Where to draw the lines

[lizzieiscontented]

DD is 13 months old and getting very demanding. Every time she is picked up she points to where she wants to go or what she wants to do and if we don't hop to, she screams. This is one amongst a serious of newly emerging difficult behaviours.

I don't want her becoming a brat and I hate to think that the empathic style of AP I've adopted so far has just taught our DD to expect everything she wants all the time. DP doesn't help as he is a big softy, hates confrontation, and lets her get away with absolutely anything. She is a happy baby but I am becoming more and more concerned that our trying to keep her happy all the time is laying the wrong kinds of foundations.

I am just after some advice on how to be a better AP mum without unwillingly encouraging DD to be a brat, lol. I know we all want to know how to do it better at times but I just feel like a bit of a failure. Like I am not being assertive enough or that her will is stronger than mine... should I be worried? Could this lead to bigger problems down the track?

THANK YOU GIRLS :hugs:

[Thermolicious]

Is she walking? I would offer to hold her hand then gradually move to encouraging her to do it by herself over a few months. Maybe try singing a song while she walks along to make it fun? I sing 'lets go walking, walking walking, lets go walking, to get your doll' (or whatever) just to make it a fun thing, she will gradually learn that it is just easier to go herself rather then wait for you lol.

[JabberJaw]

My DD was the same around that age to, i think she was just stating to walk or close to walking.

But she did get over it on her own eventually. She is now 2.5 and pretty much independant and not really demanding at all (well she is pretty demanding when her sisters and bro get home from school and she wants them to take her to the trampoline to play :laughing: if they dont do it she throws herself flat on the floor and screams till one of them gives in!)

They do grasp the concept of 'not now' or 'soon', but not until a little older. You could try to divert her attention by saying ' yes we can do such and such, but first we are going to do.....' they often forget how important such and such was!

Another thing that helps is when they develop better language skills, communication is easier and instead of screaming demands they can actually tell you what it is they want and understand why they cant have it at that time.

[sweetsugardumplin']

I would narrate :"You'd like to look at the tree, let's walk over there"

When she gets frustrated, verbalise that too "I can see that you are geting ........., would you like a cuddle" etc........

[lizzieiscontented]

Thank you so much guys! Great advice and it makes me feel so much better about where we are at right now :hugs:

She is soooo close to walking by the way too so she is definitely frustrated a lot of the time, lol