advice please girls..... I'm begging.

[spagbog]

Our Dd 3.5 years old is going all day dry undies and proud of it. As for poo she hangs on until the middle of the night. She WONT poo in a toilet. Tried charts bribes songs cranky with her, ignoring her. Tried the lot. She is in the toddlers room at daycare due to this. We have 6 months or less to sort this out or she can't start pre prep at Grammar school. What can I do? Who can I ask for help? I feel like I've failed her.

[spagbog]

Maybe there is a tt specialist?

[spagbog]

Bump tears bump

[Hollywood]

Sorry....I don't know. I used the 3 day potty training method with DS at 25 months and he was trained for wee in 4 hours with that. Poos took the full 3 days to master, and I just had to watch him like a hawk for signs that he was about to go. That helped him recognise the feeling himself. But if your DD is holding on all day and not actually showing signs....not quite sure what to do about that.

Good luck, I hope you find answers.

[Sheer Bliss]

:hugs: :hugs: You HAVEN'T failed her!!! My 3yo had a recent backwards step in TT, and on advice from another hubber - I told him he WAS a big boy and I DID NOT change pooey nappies. I popped him in the shower and got him to clean himself up. He freaked out telling me he didn't want to get poo on his hand, so I calmly told him neither did I, which is why I poo on the toilet. It took about a week, but he has finally started pooing on the loo again. The world kept revolving when he stopped to clean himself up too. He missed chuggington one morning, and then missed out on the rest of afternoon tea because he choose to poo in his nappy then. I explained to him that tomorrow, if he wanted to poo on the loo, he could finish his afternoon tea after, but not if he was pooing in his nappy.

Sounds like your DD is afraid to use the loo for poo's though? Maybe talking about it and working out why might help? good luck!

[MrsTiggyWinkle]

i'm interested in this topic too cos dd1 is 3 in oct and FREAKS if she has no nappy on and a poo coming. I can't tt her because of this. I'm just trying to expose her as much as i can. kathleen Amant books are great, i show her what i've done (and she says "well done mama" lol cute) and we watch other little friends on the loo when we get the chance. Any chance we get to de sensitize her, we take. I hope it works soon. I'll rem what pp said about making them clean self up!

[Sadaussiemum]

my ds was like that untill I explained no matter what we can come back to whatever u want to do he used to poo when he was playing, watching tv,eatting and now he says omg omg u got to stop eg if were playing lol and he goes I'll race u bet I poo before u get there lol he also had a problem with me staying around so I used to just take his shorts of and tell him to let me know when he's finished :) hope u get there soon. how does it interfear with school coming up??

[spagbog]

I thought she would have to be trained by then.

[spagbog]

Bump

[SixtiesChild]

All day with dry undies is extremely good though & I think you're nearly there.
My dd was at this stage around a year ago and would hold on even to the point of severe constipation. I was at my wits end, until......
One evening dd came to me asking for a nappy and to my surprise I discovered that I'd run out of nappies.:eek:
I told her that we'd run out & the shops were closed, which was true and that if she'd do a poo in the potty just this once, we'd go to the shop tomorrow to get some more, otherwise there simply are no nappies...... I appeared very calm about the whole thing.
I sat her on the potty & gave her some privacy and prayed for a breakthrough.... and to my surprise there was a victory.
I then made a huge song and dance about it and gave her no reason to go back to nappies and kept on telling her that she was a big girl now and just kept on praising her for her achievement. We went out to buy some 'big girls' knickers and haven't looked back.

I know how impossible it seems but One way or another you'll find a way.:)

[overitand36]

feed her something that she can not hang on, makes her want to go during the day

when she needs to go its either going to be an accident or the toilet

[Bellini]

I have heard of children not wanting to poo in toilets, and how it actually relates to a fear of them flushing part of their body away, which might explain why she has no issues urinating but a fear of pooping in there (just throwing it out there - not sure if that's the case, and also not sure how to resolve it, if it is).

Have you tried letting her phone someone close to share her achievements? My friend did this (her DS was 4) and it worked wonders. Whenever he pooped in the toilet, she let him phone his Grandma to tell her how he went to the toilet 'like a big boy'. He loved this, and before long he was pooping in the toilet every time without fail.

[spagbog]

Thanks for the advice

[ck2b]

My mum said when she TT trained me she had a friend from Thursday Island staying with her and the friend said to keep me up as late as it took to do a poo-apparently at 11pm I poohed behind the couch, ran and got toilet paper from the loo to clean it up and that was that. I was TT-i had just turned 2.

[amaliesmum]

I wish I had some advise for you :no:
I'm going through the same thing with my 3yr old at the moment, shes fine during the day and seems to hold it all in for when shes in bed with her nappy
All I can suggest is to just keep reinforcing that there should be no poos in nappies, and try to take them to the toilet every time you go...so they can see its not weird and everyone does it. We sit her on the toilet right before bed and make a huge deal of it if she does a poo and she can watch TV for an extra 20mins or so.
seems to be working slowly, in the 3 steps foward, 2 steps back kinda way!!
Good luck :fingerscrossed:

[spagbog]

She did it. My big girl went all by herself. I'm soooo happy.

[PurpleStars]

That's awesome spagbog!! I'm so happy for you both!

Emily did one during the day on the loo last week. We rang daddy (so funny getting him on the phone at work,) and she told him and was so happy. :thumbsup:

Since then its back to nap times, or first thing in the morning with her nappy. Hope we get more success soon, its so exciting when she does do it on the loo!

[spagbog]

Inevitably it will happen. I never thought I would ever be talking about poo. Ha ha.

[PurpleStars]

We're getting there!!

On the weekend Emily did a poo on the loo Friday night, then Saturday night too before bed. On Saturday she finished, went to play for a few minutes then went running back and did more!! Hubby and I were so so so happy! :yelclap:

Sunday naptime and she did one in her nappy.

Monday she was at daycare so I don't think she did one.

Today is Tuesday and I was just coming out of the loo myself and she came in saying 'I need to do a poo.' So up she got, chatted to me for a few minutes and then did one!!! :yelclap:

I think its starting to 'click' for her because she was playing with her boats in the bathroom sink when she stopped to come and do her business. :smiliedance:

[spagbog]

We'll we have had no accidents at all just undies for me mum.... I'm a big girl now. Hooray hooray.

[Bnbub]

Great news! What did uend up doing for it to work??

[brogeybear]

YAY That is awesome!

[MrsTiggyWinkle]

Yay that is great that you have had some progress! We had a breakthrough today too ( i posted above about dd1's fear of pooing on the loo). I asked her this morning would she like to wear 'big girl knickers' today, that if she wanted to do a wee she could go to the loo, and if she needed to do a poo, she could ask me to put on a nappy. And she put on knickers. And wee'd on the loo all day. And after her bath asked for a 'nappy to poo'. And went to her poo-spot (behind the couch lol :barf:) And did a poo!

She gets it, she knows what she has to do, its just the fear that is holding her back. So if she knows she can put a nappy on to poo, it takes all the fear away. :smiliedance::smiliedance::smiliedance: We have progress!!!

[spagbog]

Honestly we think it was that we gave up talking about it with her all together. We had a boy visit our work and DD said to Mr12 do you want to poo in my work toilet I'll show you where it is. They chatted. That afternoon DD just went " I'm a big girl like mr12 no more nappies for me" we had honestly come to the conclusion that she would be in university and in nappies. Pyramid gp told us to just ignore her and it worked. Good luck. No one told me I was signing up for the poo fight we had. One day it will click for your children as well. My Dd is willing to show,teach, everyone now. It is an amazing journey we as parents are on.

[Tweak]

Take her out of nappies
put her on the toilet before you go to bed that's how we did it

honestly it might get messy but soon enough laying in a bed of poop won't be so tempting :)