Child's religion

[Janelle]

I have been thinking this for a while and not really sure if my action is right.

DH is a non-practising Christian and i am a buddhist. When it come to DS, my aunt who is a christian thinks tht I should have him babtised. And she doesnt mind teaching him about the religion but now we have moved to Melbourne (she lived in Sydney) that theory doesnt work anymore.

My hubby on the other hand seems to think that I might be a better person to teach him about religion and so he should learn about buddhism. Most of Rick's family dont go to church anyway.

My feeling is i can only teach my children about my religion and it's up to them to decide wht's best for them.

[Ashleigh<3]

Just wanted to say, I 100% agree with you. I don’t enjoy enforcing religion upon anyone.
When my little is old enough to come to me asking about religion/god/heaven/angels, etc.
I will share with him/her what I believe in but I will make it blatantly heard of that they can follow whatever path they choose. Just as long as it’s not some scary cult where people self-inflict pain upon themselves. I don’t think any mother would want this for their children.:(

I would take it as a compliment that your husband is so keen on the idea that you should teach your little one about Buddhism, he obviously appreciates your religion regardless of the one he may follow. This is good :yes:

[Ana Gram]

Why is your own religion not good enough to be teaching your child?

Or you could wait until he is old enough to decide for himself.

[Janelle]

It's not a matter whether my religion is good enough or not. I dont think i am a good at teaching him about religion. I have a strong faith in my religion but not learning enough about it.

I guess i could only do my best to tell him what's good and what's bad. As long as he is a good person, tht's all matter.

[xkwzit]

My feeling is i can only teach my children about my religion and it's up to them to decide wht's best for them.

I think that you've got it exactly right just there. You can teach him what you believe and when he is old enough, he will make his decision. :thumbsup:

Cheers

[alicesmum]

hi Janelle
I am a practising Zen Buddhist (though don't practise as much as I ought!) but I grew up Catholic. My DH is aetheist but happy for our kids to learn about all sorts of religions. So I face a similar quandry to yours :)

I guess i plan to teach my kids about buddhism most of all, but also about christianity (as I understand it from my catholic upbringing). I do feel strongly however that kids can't "decide for themselves" unless you give them a baseline or foundation to work from, whether it's christianity or buddhism or any spiritual tradition. most of all, i think it's always important to state that it's what you practise because it's right for you, and that in your experience it has worked for you in certain ways etc.

That way, they don't feel like they're "being bad" if they reach a point in their life where they want to take a different spiritual path or none at all.

is this similar to what you plan to do?

[~EmsMum~]

My feeling is i can only teach my children about my religion and it's up to them to decide wht's best for them.

You are totally right there :)

[juliek]

We plan on giving our daughter a respect and understanding of ALL religions. Should one apeal to her, then she is free to make her own decisions to follow it.
I was brought up in a very strict, religous family and was forced to follow rules and beliefs I completely disaggreed with.
I think it is best to guide them with a spiritual mind, but let them find their own path.

[pookiesossige]

...I do feel strongly however that kids can't "decide for themselves" unless you give them a baseline or foundation to work from, whether it's christianity or buddhism or any spiritual tradition.....

Alicesmum, I've always thought the same as this (although I'm not a Zen Buddist :) ) While I have respect for other religions, I'm a Christian and will guide my children to understand that God loves them, 'knows them by name' and will guide them throughout their lives etc. I think they will come to see this mainly by DH and I being a living example- certainly not by 'forcing' our beliefs onto them or making them go to church. But by just being who we are. I mean, it's part of how we identify ourselves so it's not like that's hidden from our children.

[Janelle]

I do feel strongly however that kids can't "decide for themselves" unless you give them a baseline or foundation to work from

Alice mum, you are so right.

JulieK you've got a point there too.

I am raised in a multi-cultural country and i have family and friends of different religions. I should teach my children about religions other than my own too so they will learn to respect and live with ppl fr all background. I think that's what the world should learn, may be then we wont have all these wars.

Thank you all for your advise and opinions.

[~rambox~]

I am Anglican and my DH is not any religion. Our Children are not any religion either, Even though myself and DH are both non believers in the whole scenario our children have religous people around them and can Decide for themselves when they get older. I am not against anyone that believes i am just the type of person who needs visable proof.;)

[Yasmeena]

We plan on giving our daughter a respect and understanding of ALL religions. Should one apeal to her, then she is free to make her own decisions to follow it.
I was brought up in a very strict, religous family and was forced to follow rules and beliefs I completely disaggreed with.
I think it is best to guide them with a spiritual mind, but let them find their own path.

What a fantastic philosophy :yes: I try to do that by discussing different beliefs with my children but could probably improve my knowledge on other religions/belief systems/cults.
What religions are you planning on teaching your daughter about?

[Pippi Longstocking]

I try to do the same as JulieK. I think that a lot of religious wars are due to religious intolerance rather than religion itself. We need teach our children to be tolerant of the spiritual beliefs of others. The best way to do this is to help them understand that different people believe different things and that is ok.
While we are not in any way a religious family, I teach my children that the basic premise of religion is based on good. That most religious people believe in good things and the religious beliefs of others aren't to be feared. I teach them that sometimes people don't understand the beliefs of others and this causes wars rather than the religion itself being the cause of wars.

My husband and I disagree on this to a certain extent. He has been scarred by his Catholic upbringing and is a little less tolerant of religion. He believes that there are some religions that preach intollerance of other people's beliefs. He is right to a certain degree but I want to raise the children to believe in the good of other's religions rather than view it in a negative and intollerant light.
And as this is about me and what I believe, he's wrong and I'm right :D

[Mr. Ogyny]

There are many religions that preach intolerance. Christians believe that non-Christians are going to burn in hell. Muslims believe that by killing heathens (non-Muslims) one is assured a place in paradise with 72 virgins to do your bidding. Jehovahs and Mormons believe in their ideals so much they knock on my door trying to "save" me. The only truly tolerant religion I have come across is Buddhism. They accept all religions and other peoples religious beliefs. In fact, my new tactic for doorknockers is to say that I am a Buddhist and that I accept that their religion has a place in the world. Just not mine. I then laugh heartily as they retreat in confusion.

Scarred by my Catholic upbringing? When you are thirteen and read the bible and have a lot of questions you go to your local parish priest. You ask said priest about the inconsistencies and he hums and haws and then the best he can come up with is "You must believe". Right there he lost me. If I was reading a novel and it had the same discrepencies in it I would throw it away. So I did. Yay me.

I think it is much better to teach children basic morals and ethics. That way they will learn that stealing is bad without a thundery voice screaming that they will go to hell. Going to hell is not a viable consequence for a child. All you are going to do is scare the bejesus (pardon the pun) out of them. Better to explain the effect that stealing has on all concerned. The victim, the perpetrator, families. And what about honouring thy mother and father? What if they were abusive hating parents, do they still warrant honouring?

My basic point is that if you teach your children to be good you won't need a religious stick to beat them over the head with.

[Pippi Longstocking]

Eeek! Who let him in?

Bubhub, meet husband. Husband, meet bubhub.......


I agree with you re buddhism. It is a lovely tolerant peaceful religion. And you know I agree with you re teaching the kids about cause and effect rather than threatening them with going to hell etc. But where I disagree with you in giving them the impression that religion is necessarily a bad thing.

Furthermore, I am right and you know it :p

[Little Gorilla]

oooohhhh Norah....I thought he was an imposter

[Pippi Longstocking]

Yeah, an imposter, that's what he is! let's have him banned immejatly! :laughing:

No, I admit it. He is my luffly although somewhat argumentative husband - we are well matched really :D

[Janelle]

hi Mr and Mrs Titov :D