What did you "give up" to become a parent? [Archive] - Bub Hub Pregnancy & Parenting Forum

Mischief

18-08-2006, 09:55

Okay, I'm just curious as to what things, if any, you decided to give up when becoming pregnant or decided to start a family?

My hubby and I gave up our motorbikes....we decided that they are fun, but high risk, and a parent needs to be around for their child, not 6ft under because they went thru a corner to fast. (I actually nearly did go off the side of a "mountain", went into a corner that is 25kph doing about 130kph, I dont know how I saved it.....:no: Not fun, very scarey!)

I also gave up the idea of moving jobs, because I know that the one i have now(currently on leave) will allow me to work part time and if I changed jobs it might not be possible.

Of course you make lots off little sacrifices every day, and some big ones, but its totally worth it and I wouldnt change anything for the world.

What did you give up or change about your life?

~EmsMum~

18-08-2006, 09:57

I gave up going out

sleeping in!!!

gave up studying and the career i wanted (for the time being)

gave up being selfish (which is a good thing)

I stopped spending money on myself

but like you said I wouldn't change anything for the world

bronny-jane

18-08-2006, 10:04

i gave up living an alcoholic lifestyle....nothing but +++ here:D

Femme-Fetale

18-08-2006, 10:07

i gae up smoking + drinking

I gave up my all of a sudden career advancement and payrise

i gave up where i lived

and more importantly, i gave up the r/ship with the father so i could be a better mother and my son a happier child!

Rainbowbrite

18-08-2006, 10:09

I gave up a very boring life to be honest. I love every minute of being a sahm, dont even remember life before, i just existed, now I live :)

Mum2Bug

18-08-2006, 10:19

I happily gave up:

* a full time job as I was so stressed anyway

*my relationship with Bugs father as I wasnt happy with it and wouldve been a miserable mummy to Bug had I stayed with him

*the house I was living in to move into the one Im in now (although I miss the grapevines)

* life as I had known it!

But I would not change a single thing for the world. Bug is the most precious part of me and my life and I would be nothing without her now. She made me who I am!

FourAngelKisses

18-08-2006, 10:22

I gave up absolutely nothing!!! Never been a going out, party person. Never drank or smoked. Never been social....always been a homebody. So I guess I'm with rainbowbright, I gave up a boring life for total controlled chaos, lol.

Ana Gram

18-08-2006, 10:26

Freedom to put it bluntly. I had a very carefree and spur of the moment lifestyle.

bekkyboo

18-08-2006, 10:29

as i am 22 - and i had just met my DH, we were partying alot, so i gave up that entire lifestyle. I gave up work, sleep and my sanity of late.

but i get good times - even though he has been a terror this morning, i put on a migel migs cd - and he sat in his bouncer and danced to it (best a 10week old bubba can) then put himself to sleep.

Pixie

18-08-2006, 10:31

I gave up nothing and gained everything :D

Melo

18-08-2006, 10:34

I gave up my freedom, and SLEEP!

Although I would never change it for the world :D

shed

18-08-2006, 10:35

DP and I have discussed this. We gave up a boring life as well. We had stopped going out, although he still did occasionally - about every eight weeks or so he would go out with his mates but he was halfhearted about it.

I gave up living alone and DP gave up living with two feral flatmates.

I gave up working but my job was a contract that finished at the end of June anyway, so I would have just gone on to another job which I have done anyway (as a mummy).

I have never been a big drinker except for the binge drinking of my twenties which was LONG GONE.

I gave up smoking when I got my puppy two and a half years ago.

I gave up paying rent and the bills coz DP does that now.

I gave up feeling afraid that I would be one of the unlucky 'over 35 year olds' that want a baby but never have one.

SamanthaJane

18-08-2006, 10:35

I would probabaly say freedom... but thats not necesarily a bad thing either.

Niki

18-08-2006, 10:42

im not sure wat i gave up i guess i was just boring before :D

Rainbowbrite

18-08-2006, 10:50

Never been a going out, party person. Never drank or smoked. Never been social....always been a homebody. So I guess I'm with rainbowbright, I gave up a boring life for total controlled chaos, lol.

Thats me to a tee :yes:

reAllytee

18-08-2006, 10:56

I feel like ive lost my freedom.

shed

18-08-2006, 10:59

Allyoo, freedom to do what? Please elaborate (although i don't mean to sound like a counsellor or anything)

Areca

18-08-2006, 11:08

I willingly gave up

Studying and my career

My small car (ok so that's for future bub's not this bub cause she still fitted in it)

I not so willingly gave up my cat but he was super stressed and now lives a great life with my BIL so I still get to see him.

DP gave up his jet ski

reAllytee

18-08-2006, 11:11

Allyoo, freedom to do what? Please elaborate (although i don't mean to sound like a counsellor or anything)

To go out alone, to be alone, to do anything alone.

Boof wont go to anyone else besides my sister for say 30mins & even then i still have to be around so to speak.

I used to go out with friends whenever i wanted jump on a train go here there & everywhere, worked so had my own money as well as our money.
Now to go out anywhere i have to make sure Boof is in bed & if im lucky i get to go out. Ive been out & had to return home after an hour once as he wouldnt go back to sleep without me plus with DP not being fully functional it means he cant physically look after him. We are having money troubles due to DP not being able to work then its not like i can go back to work because DP again cant look after Boof & i have buckleys chance of him going into daycare ( not sure if i want him to either ) so it means we have little to spare to do things anyways.

Dont get me wrong i love Boof to death but to be honest i dont even know who i am anymore & i cant exactly say im enjoying motherhood at this point.
So here ends my rant & whinge ....

LittleBoysRock

18-08-2006, 11:13

tyler's mum

18-08-2006, 11:15

im like every one else i guess my freedom, my job, drinking, partying, spending money on myself,

the main one SEX:laughing: :laughing:

i would change it for the world being tyler's mummy is the best thing i have ever done

Sarie

18-08-2006, 11:22

I guess it depends how you look at it, I don't really think about what I gave up, more that my priorities have changed. My family and my kids are far more important than things I used to do. Sure I finished work and we don't get to go out, have sleep ins or buy as much materialistic things as we used to. But I'm so much happier being a wife and a mum than working my guts out for someone who didn't really care.

Areca

18-08-2006, 11:55

I think I gave up the opportunity to persue a career at least for a few years.
Gave up the opportunity to own my own home in the short term.
Opportunity to study full-time.
My chance to travel overseas and go on a wild contiki tour through europe! :laughing:
And my sleep!!:rolleyes:

I went on a contiki tour when I was 5 1/2 months pg around Europe..needless to say I didn't drink or go out but I still went!

FourAngelKisses

18-08-2006, 12:20

Gave up the opportunity to own my own home in the short term.

Don't think like that.....we brought our first home when we had 3 kids. It is possible!!!

Fitmumma

18-08-2006, 12:24

I gave up nothing and gained everything :D

Ditto!!!:smiliedance:

~rambox~

18-08-2006, 12:30

I gave up Sleep and Quiet :crying: But I wouldn't change a thing :thumbsup:

aprilbaby

18-08-2006, 12:31

I gave up....

Sleep - found out I don't need that much

Alcohol - found out I don't miss it and don't need it

Time on my own - found out when I have it I miss my DS!

My flat strechmark free stomach - found out it was a small price to pay for the joy of carrying a child

My perky boobs - now those I miss:laughing: :laughing: but again a small price to pay for the joy of BF my boy.

I agree with you all, there is nothing I wouldn't give up in a second to be a Mum. Nothing else could come close!

cjb/jbvd

18-08-2006, 12:41

i gave up my lovingly restored, customised convertible because i couldn't put a baby seat in it.
i gave up a few hobbies because i can't afford them and provide the best of everything for DS.
i gave up the idea of changing career (at least for another five or six years) to something i enjoy so that i can provide some security.
i gave up all remnants of a social life.
i gave up a really great looking body.
i gave up new anything for myself.

but i got back a smile that could melt antarctica, and the opportunity to contribute to the moulding of another human being.

so i reckon it was a fair trade. :D

lukaelmo

18-08-2006, 12:49

Freedom to put it bluntly. I had a very carefree and spur of the moment lifestyle.

yes... bye bye freedom...

PhAnToM

18-08-2006, 12:57

Sanity!!!!:banghead:

pookiesossige

18-08-2006, 13:04

Yes, there are some things I miss, but I know I can re-claim when the kids are a few years older.

- we used to be really spontaneous, jumping in the car and heading for the hills for a picnic, swim, romance :D Well, when the kids are older we can do this again (but save the 'romance' for when we are alone at night :p )

- I used to love my alone time- but I know that I will have this again (although in smaller doses) as my kids get old enough for activities such as kindy, school etc.

Initially I think that I miss the money DH and I made when both working full-time without dependants.. But you know what? It never mattered how much we made, we were always broke! We have very little to live on these days, but waste far less on selfish pursuits (except for the odd useless and quickly abandoned 'project' of DH's ;) )

subaruforestermum

18-08-2006, 13:07

I gave up a

= party lifestyle
= a $2000+ per week paying job
= my Diploma of Business Management, HR management & small Business Management
= drinking
= a lavish lifestyle, buying myself jewellery, clothes etc all the time.
& my friends gave up on me......

:smiliedance: But I am a mum now, and I have no regrets about becoming a mum....sometimes I miss going out with friends, or the lavish lifestyle, but I wouldn't change him being around, although I cant wait for the day I can pamper myself again.......

Briannabear

18-08-2006, 13:09

I really miss going away on weekends regularly. We'd often just up and go to the coast for the weekend or go visit family, but its not that simple anymore.
We also gave up going to the pub on a Friday night for a counter meal. (lame I know but it was a tradition of ours!)
Oh, and we gave up our social life!
I gave up my career as well. And I dont miss it at all!

But we've gained so much! An incredible little person who we adore and she adores us - and who always makes us laugh! And soon, another addition to our little family! :D
Our social life now involves doing 'child friendly' things - usually with our friends who also have children, and we love it!

Mischief

18-08-2006, 13:16

cheezelkat

18-08-2006, 13:51

I miss just going out, whenever, wherever with DP. We'd just drive till we got bored. I also gave up my law degree, hip hugging jeans and cute little bras.

I have no regrets though.

Ana Gram

18-08-2006, 14:28

cute little bras.

:crying:

Milliner

18-08-2006, 15:03

I gave up sleep!!!!

I gave up traveling around the world

I gave up work for now anyway (YEY)

RuthK

18-08-2006, 17:31

I gave up my career to stay at home and take care of my 3 little ones, one of whom is suspected autism. I do not regret my decision for one second but sometimes wish that my husband would respect that the work I do is just, if not more, important than his!

Percy

18-08-2006, 17:34

DH gave up his motorbike.

I gave up sleep!:laughing:

Not anything compared to what we have now!!! wouldnt change it for the world.

misskittyfantastico

18-08-2006, 17:38

I gave up my sleep - I hold on the hope that ONE DAY DD will sleep more than one hour during the day and sleep through the night.

I gave up my freedom/alone time

I gave up my job and with it my "fun money"

goes with the territory though.

Mischief

18-08-2006, 18:27

I just love Oliver so much...all the sacrifices are worth it! :D

misskittyfantastico

18-08-2006, 18:42

I just love Oliver so much...all the sacrifices are worth it! :D

I'm not saying I don't love my baby more than my life. I'm just being honest and saying that I find being a mother extemely hard. I often question my suitability for the role.

M O P

18-08-2006, 18:54

I often question my suitability for the role.
After reading your BF story, I think you're more than made for the job!

misskittyfantastico

18-08-2006, 18:56

:hugs: Karen, I wasn't trying to throw a pity-party. I just never realised how bloody hard being a parent could be!

M O P

18-08-2006, 19:01

I know, but it's Friday night and I've got no where to go so why not cheer myself up by giving someone some praise!!

Mischief

18-08-2006, 19:12

Hey Miss Kitty - I certainly was NOT having a go at you! :hugs:

Being a mum is bl**dy hard work! There are days when I think...OMG what did I do! And yep, my money disapears and its not on ME! LOL

I dont think anyone could say you dont love being a mum, you are doing an amazing job! We all are! Being a mum is a job and a half!!!!

I was just saying, that despite the bad things, the things I have given up...including sleep...LOL...I wouldnt change it for the world. :)

poshBecks

18-08-2006, 19:15

I gave up work!! :yelclap: I love being a SAHM!!! :D I guess we did give up DINKS (double income no kids) but we are probably more finacially stable now than we ever were!! LOL Go figure!! (actually thankyou God for providing!!)

misskittyfantastico

18-08-2006, 19:23

Sorry Mischief :hugs: I'm a bit of a temperamental bovine ATM! I know you weren't having a go.

Natsmummy

18-08-2006, 19:30

I gave up sleeping in :thumbsdown:
and I gave up smoking :D

drewid

18-08-2006, 19:39

I don't think I gave up anything, to be honest. I quit my job when I was 20 wks pregnant, but I had been planning on changing jobs anyway.

Our lives aren't much different now to how they were pre-baby. We have been blessed with a child that is happy-go-lucky and loves to sleep, so there is just about as much "us" time at night as there ever was, and we don't hesitate to do the things we love on weekends, like going for long drives in the country and visiting friends and family and shopping. Andrew has fit into our lives really well and I don't feel like I've missed out on anything.

I must be the odd one out here.

Mischief

18-08-2006, 19:42

Sorry Mischief :hugs: I'm a bit of a temperamental bovine ATM! I know you weren't having a go.

Dont worry....I'm a cow at the best of times...HEY...I make milk...so dont mess with me! LOL :D

Hugs anyway, you are doing a great job! You are allowed to have bad days!

Blessed Mum

18-08-2006, 19:45

I don't know if I have completely given it up yet but slowly I am forfieting my sanity :D .

Other than that just the normal things like sleep, work etc - it is all worth it though :)

natasha

18-08-2006, 19:50

I gave up my nice perky boobs, my ultra flat stomach, my social life, being able to just pop out to the shops looking glam without a baby/nappies/wipes/a change of clothes for DD, a snack, bottles/bibs/toys! I gave up sleep, a proper diet, running every morning, drinking, gosh the list goes on!! As someone said though, It's so worth it (most of the time), now I have to go and see to my screaming DD to won't go to sleep and has diorhea! lol

arthursmum

18-08-2006, 22:38

Gave up sleeeeeeep ins, ooo i miss sleeeeeep ins!
& my job as a personal chef, which i sometimes miss a bit 'cos i got to travel to beautiful places..

JATS

18-08-2006, 22:41

I second the "gave up nothing, gained everything" sentiment!:yelclap::smiliedance: :yelclap:

Mischief

19-08-2006, 10:08

I gave up my brain....Oliver stole it at about 5 weeks!

I gave up my heart....he stole that the second he was conceived..... *awww* :)

~EmsMum~

19-08-2006, 10:23

I gave up my brain....Oliver stole it at about 5 weeks!

I gave up my heart....he stole that the second he was conceived..... *awww* :)

yep ive lost my brain aswell :laughing:

priya

19-08-2006, 11:26

hi,

I think that i have gained much more than giving up. Yes, i will have to stay at home for a couple of years but i am enjoying every bit of it. I have gained confidence which i was lacking before the birth of Ria. I thought that i couldn't cope without any social support but i am enjoying making self decisions and parenting Ria in my own style. Yes, i am tired somedays but i think that if the part of housework is eliminated i will sail smoothly.;)

rynosmum

19-08-2006, 11:46

I will 'third' the gave up nothing and gained everything comment:thumbsup:

My husband and my relationship has become much stronger, my career has became much more successful since I changed companies to one who allowed me to work from home, we are where we want to be in life and have a wonderfully amazing little boy to share it with. We take ourselves less seriously and spend much more time at the park, the beach, picnics and generally smelling the roses.

We're blessed and truly appreciate every day :)