My mother-in-law is fretting about our cat and the new baby

[tracya]

My name is Tracy and I am expecting my first baby in April 2005. My mother-in-law (MIL) is in an absolute tizz - frightened that our cat, who has always has run of the house is going to smother the baby. Has anyone out there dealt with issues around new babies and jealous family pets. We thought of getting a custom designed cot that has some sort of hinged lid covered taut with mesh or something similar so the cat can't get in but MIL says the baby will feel jailed (an extreme view one would think). However MIL also says what about when the baby is not in the cot - perhaps in a play pen or even pram and I am not constantly looking where the cat is? Just to complicate things a bit further my husband is blind and so MIL asks how will Cam know if the cat is near the baby? I would really appreciate all input on this situation - it is also MIL's first grandchild so she is really worked up about this.

[Christine]

Hi Tracy

I'm not sure I have any real solutions, but I had a cat & dog when my son was born 3 yrs ago. The dog was outside, so of course we were always with him with the dog. Only about 4 months ago, when we moved to a new property, did we let the dog & Luke together without keeping a constant eye on him. Now of course, they can't leave each other alone!
As for the cat, we just kind of kept an eye out. We never had a playpen, but we did make an issue of the cat being in the baby's room, making sure he knew that was not his area. Other than that, we let Luke play on the floor, or mat, and just tried to keep the cat at a distance. Soon the cat got to know, he wasn't allowed too close to the baby. And before (too) long Luke was moving around and about, and then he couldn't keep away from the cat, which then annoyed the cat!
I don't know of any products you can buy for this sort of thing. Maybe a bassinet, or cot, which are up higher from the floor. In fact, I've never actually heard of this as being a real issue, has it ever happened to anyone? I'm sure your MIL is really concerned , but maybe you can dig up some facts about the chances of such a thing happening. I don't mean to make light of her concerns, but there are probably more dangerous things around your home for your baby than the cat. Good Luck.
Christine (mum of Luke)

[jakobsmum]

Hi :D

I have a cat and was a small concern for me when I first had Jakob. Tigger is like a lot of cats and curious about new things, he gave Jakob a sniff and wasn't too interested. He has slept in Jakobs cot but only when he isn't in there. The door to his room is always shut when he is having a nap. Bassinet wasn't a prob as he slept next to me and the cat prefered our bed. Jakob loves Tigger now and squeals with delight every time he sees him, but Tigger won't have a bar of him. Jakob doesn't pat gently :rolleyes: We have never had an issue with the play pen either.

Sorry if this is all jumbled but hope it makes some sense.

[bubbalove]

Hi Tracey

We never had a problem with our 2 cats either. I read somewhere while I was pregnant the first time that if you put alfoil or baloons in the cot before the baby is born, they will scare the cat and then the cat will realise that it is not to go in the cot. As with other people, we always keep Aidan's door shut when he is sleeping.
Small, squirming babies on the floor or in a pram are not really an enticing place for a cat to sleep, so I don't think this will be a problem when the baby is awake. Mother-in-law's sometimes like to put their 2 cents in, but if it wasn't about this, then is would be about something else by the sounds of it ;)
Try not to stress too much, and enjoy the rest of your pregnancy

[Lachlan's Mum]

Hi Tracy :)

We have 2 cats and 2 dogs. The dogs are outside so not a problem....when I take Lachlan out the back (he is only 5 mths so I carry him) all they do is lick his feet (and hands if he reaches out to them!) yuck :eek: They are not vicious dogs and I don't envisage any probs down the track.

With the cats - our big surprise was that we thought one of the cats ("Molly") who is very clingy and affectionate would really get jealous and be the one who paid the most attention to the new addition to the house...not that I was concerned about her suffocating the baby or anything....but she is NOT interested at all and I think is a bit put out by the attention the baby gets, so just keeps her distance.

Our other cat ("Kimba") is older (9 yrs) and NOT sociable at all...can be quite vicious if you try and pick him up etc. does not go near strangers and all that....well he has taken on this motherly type role.....he is so curious about Lachlan...rubs on him, lets Lachlan pull his fur out, pull his ears, and bascially has "watched" over Lachlan since he was born. We tried initially to keep both cats (not that Molly is one bit interested) out of the babies room, and out of our room when bub was little and in there to sleep, but Kimba was really determined to be checking on Lachlan constantly, we just gave up in the end, and again I never once have had a feeling that they'd do anything to hurt him. Now Kimba will sleep in bub's room at every opportunity.....watching over him from a chair or something. We do draw the line at the cot....Kimba has gotten comfy in there a couple of times WITH Lachlan (but up the other end) and we take him straight out and he knows he is not allowed, as soon as you go in his body language is like "i've been busted!" :p

Anyway, like some of the other mums we've just kept an eye out. Also, as with what bubbalove said, cats don't really like to be around them when awake as they move too much and make too much noise!! :p

Don't panic! Hubby and I have always been of the opinion also that the bigger deal you make out of it the more curious the animals will be...and the more put out they'll feel...remember that it was their home and they never asked for a baby to be brought home! If you are too mean to them and make a big deal I think they'd be more inclined to do something, than if you try and strike a balance and make everyone still feel at home.

Sorry this is soooo long, but I do love my animals so I definately have an opinion on this one!

[earthmother]

Hi Tracy,

I have three cats and they were all raised as indoor cats and had run of the house. My baby (Renee) is 5 and a half months old now and I was concerned at how my 'fur-babies' would react to having a little human taking up all of my time.

What my hubby and I ended up doing was getting an aluminium screen door installed on the outside of the main door and we used paw-proof mesh so that the cats cannot claw the mesh and break it. That way, we can leave the main door open and just close the screen door so there is still adequate ventilation and we can still hear her waking up, playing etc. We got the screen door made up at a door place and they came out and measured and installed it. It cost $150 but it has given us peace of mind.

When Renee is bigger, we shall take the screen door off so it is only a temporary measure at present.

I used to let the cats in the room before I had Renee just so that they could have a sticky-beak and let them know that something was happening. I have never banned them from the house and in the early days they would come up and sniff/lick the back of Renee's head whilst I was breast feeding her. I feel that the cats have accepted her and whilst I do not let them into her room, they are still happy to be able to see, smell, hear all of the different noises that baby makes.

The cats now have 'outside time' in the mornings and then they come back in and sleep for the rest of the day in one of their comfy spots (but not in bub's room).

When I have Renee out in the lounge room on the floor, I just keep an eye out if the cats come around for a look but they seem quite intrigued by her. I guess it also depends on the cat's personality and all three of mine are pretty relaxed felines.

Sorry for rambling on, but hope this may help you in preparing for the arrival of your little one.

Cheers,

[H&B'sMum]

I agree with everything that has been written. Before I had Harry I caught our cat Borda asleep in his cot and I made sure in no uncertain terms that Borda was not allowed in the cot. From then on he was scared to go into Harry's room but would do so only when we were in there. We tried to allow Borda to sniff the new furniture and other baby things so he would get use to something being there. While I was pregnant Borda could not leave me alone, whenever I'd sit on the couch Borda would jump up onto me. Towards the end of my pregnancy he got a kick in the ear and didn't sleep on me anymore.
When Harry arrived we introduced them, my Dh was holding Borda with his front paws in his hands and I was holding Harry we allowed Borda to sniff Harry and realise that he was here.
Whenever Harry is on his blanket Borda walks right around it and will not step a paw onto it. Now Harry gets very excited when he sees Borda and even though he can't crawl yet makes forward movements as if he wants to follow him. Harry also watches Borda whenever he comes into the room.
We also keep the door to Harry's room closed when he's asleep, but we have not had any trouble with Borda since Harry's been here.
Show your MIL all these posts and hopefully that will ease her mind.
An ex friend of mine treats her cat with disdain now that she has her baby and I can't handle the way she treats her cat. I heard her once say to her cat "Why don't you go play with traffic". I hate it when people turn on their pets when they have a baby. I like the term someone else used "fur-babies" that is excatly what they are.
If you treat your cat with respect and let her slowly ease into having a new addition you hopefully won't have any problems.
Good luck and enjoy the rest of your pregnancy. :)