My baby just wants to sleep all the time... can't do anything

[coffeekid]

Okay, it might sound good in theory but it is becoming really difficult - my 4 month old just wants to sleep all the time, at home, in his cot.

The problem is that my husband is out most of the time and I don't have much help. If I take DS out anywhere I feel incredibly guilty and just awful because he gets hysterically tired and I feel so bad for him. If I just stay at home with him all day and night he is a peaceful, happy, settled baby.

Is this normal/okay? He has always slept a lot, e.g. 8-9 hours at a stretch from birth! Currently his natural, at home sleeping pattern seems to be: wake up around 7:30am be up for about 1/2 hr play, feed, back to sleep until about 11:30am. Up for 1/2 hr then feed, back to sleep for up to 4 hours, up for feed around 5-6pm (sometimes have to wake him) straight back to bed. I wake him around 10pm for a feed then straight back to bed where he sleeps through to 7:30am.

Any suggestions on how I can function? I know I should not complain and I could have much worse problems but I am feeling quite isolated without much support and don't really want to feel guilty if I need to go out of the house with him. He hardly ever sleeps in the pram and is even worse in a carrier. I think if he was a bad sleeper anyway I would probably get out more because I would think "may as well take him out - he's not sleeping anyway!".

[ICanDream]

I have nothing to advise really but I'll be interested. DD is generally a bad day sleeper but today has had two 2hr naps which is really unlike her - she is a good night sleeper just the days are horrid. I decided that today I would make it about her and just work around it, but generally I just make her tag along and suffer the consequences later or I'd go insane!!

[MothersMilk]

Can you have people come over to your house for visits, that way bub can remain asleep but you get some socializing as well?

[Mmm Dessert]

That does seem like quite a lot of sleep. What happens when you cut short his sleep? Is he still cranky?

My DS is three and a half months. He's a pretty good sleeper but sometimes I just have to get out. If he cries because he's missed a big sleep I know he will catch up again later.

I think sometimes you need to leave the house for your own sanity.

[crazymuma]

I think a baby needs to fit in with a mothers life - the mother shouldn't try and fit everything in with the baby.

Take him out and get him used to either waking up and leaving the house or sleeping while out.

[LibranTwin]

Wow what a great little sleeper you have :)

I can see how you would feel bad mucking up his sleep as I used to feel like that with DD. She never slept that much but I would have to schedule 1 hr outings and be back for a sleep or I would have a screamer on my hands too.

Hmmm suggestions, I think somedays if you are going mad you need to just get out and take your chances with him. Have you got any hobbies to keep you occupied? Or like of posters have suggested can you organise friends to drop in to your place more often?

They don't sleep like forever and the older they get the easier it is to spend more time out. He will sleep less and less as the months go by and hopefully you will be able to get out more!!

[~Temet Nosce~]

I had the problem of my dd never sleeping anywhere but her cot and I could never do anything. So when ds came along I vowed that it would be different. He gets carted out and about in the pram all the time, and he just had to get used to it. Most times he will now sleep in his pram if we are out at nap time (he is 6 months) but sometimes he might miss one of have a short one, or have a nap at a different time.. but it's better than being housebound, alot more freedom. I always stick to his nighttime routine at home though and he is in bed without fail in his own bed, between 6.30-7pm.
eta. Just persist with taking him out in the pram, he will hopefully just get used to it.

[coffeekid]

Thanks everyone for your thoughts. It is so nice to know that others have had the same issue.

I think you are right KiaKai, mum2be08 and W+E+O: I do need to go out sometimes for my own sanity. Some mornings I think "Okay, I am going to take DS out and he will just have to sleep/get used to it" then my resolve wavers when the poor little tyke stops smiling happily at me (which he does for the first 15 mins) and gets hysterically tired. :(

I am just glad to know that it does get better and that it has helped others to persist and push through it... I will keep trying and especially trying not to feel guilty!