DH, DS and I ALL not coping! Don't know what to do.

[ziggie]

For the past few days, DS has been horrible. I am not coping very well, and poor DH is copping it when he gets home. Today I said I hate DS for the first time, and now I hate myself for it :crying: .
DS is not settling properly, not sleeping properly, not feeding properly, and basically spending a hell of a lot of time crying.
We try everything to settle him, and when he finally calms down from hysterical crying, we'll put him in his bassinet to sleep, and within 10-15 minutes he's crying again.
We thought it was wind, and have tried Brauers colic relief, Hartleys gripe water, and Infacol but he still cries. He even seems to be burping properly?!?! And nearly every feed, he has the first boob well, then he burps, then when I go to give him the other side, he cries and cries, shaking his head back and forth, going stiff, refusing to suckle and gets so hysterical that it takes ages to calm him down, and it all starts over again. I think he's tired so put him to bed, but he won't sleep.
He has a hernia, which is being operated on on Monday.... so I don't know whether that is causing it... but my cousin had one when he was a baby, and my Auntie said he was acting nothing like my DS, and that wouldn't be causing it.
I don't know what else to do... I can't get anything done around the house... feel like I don't want to go out anywhere.... Basically feel hopeless.
Any suggestions would be great....! :crying: :gloomy:

[Manxie]

Hi Mitchellsmum

Sorry to hear that you are having such a hard time:hugs: Could he have an ear infection? It sounds like he is pain when he is lying on one side and that could be the cause.

Just a thought

[brooke]

:hugs: Dont hate your self.. what you are feeling is what every mum feels at some point. we are only human and need a break. Paige used to bbe dificult when she was a tiny baby (nothing like you are describing) i used to find taking her out for a walk was good for both me and her and we still walk daily!
Have u maybe tried calling your child and youth health nurse? maybe they might be able to help???
:hugs:

[SnoozesWithCats]

First of all ...

:hugs: to you this sounds like a really rough patch - we all get them - some worse than others. Just keep telling yourself - whatever happens, next month will be ALL different - they change so much at this age! And almost everyone agrees that six weeks - which you're only just over - is a peak crying time for most bubs




He has a hernia, which is being operated on on Monday.... so I don't know whether that is causing it... but my cousin had one when he was a baby, and my Auntie said he was acting nothing like my DS, and that wouldn't be causing it.

just because you cousin's baby reacted one way, doesn't mean YOUR baby is going to - I don't really know much about hernias, but it could well be that, and your bub just happens to react worse than some others.

Not much help really, but ... hang in there.

It WILL get better!

(promise!)

[~EmsMum~]

aww hun, big hugs comming your way :hugs:

[daisyxs]

hi, just wondering, does bubs throw up or seem to regurgitate he milk after his feed?
if so, it could be reflux, just suggesting it cos my DD used to cry and go stiff if i tried to feed her from the 2nd side.

also dont forget that most babies will be horrible little beasts around 5ish pm til their next feed time.
hope that helps :hugs:
daisy

[Mummabear]

We all feel hopeless in the beginning - don't beat yourself up.

It wouldn't hurt to take a trip with DS to the doctor and have him checked out thoroughly. It might be nothing at all and just something you have to ride through, or it might be his hernia or an ear infection or something else completely. I was constantly at the doc's in the early days, I figured it was best to be safe and have them think I was a hypocondriact (sp) mother than for something to be wrong and ignore it.

I ended up having nurse DS 24/7 in the early days - he just wouldn't be put down without crying. Trust me, it does get better. Hang in there :hugs:

[TwoBlue]

but my cousin had one when he was a baby, and my Auntie said he was acting nothing like my DS, and that wouldn't be causing it.


Every baby responds differently to pain / discomfort / generally not feeling well etc etc..

I would wait until after his Op and see how he is, if there is still no improvement then there is probably a good reason for why he is behaving that way, i would see your Gp and talk about your options in perhaps trying to get to the bottom of it.

Or he is just an unsettled bubba (like mine !! )

Good luck with his op and try not to stress :hugs:

[kamaraj]

You poor thing, i totally understand where you are coming from. Lil cody was much the same as you are describing, i suffered for quite a while the decided to go to the dr, he had reflux and colic. The dr prescribed Zantac for him and it worked wonders it was like having a new baby. Maybe worth getting the dr to have a look at him. Dont feel bad about saying you hated him, Im sure we have all done it, I did many a times with Cody, even wondering to myself as to why I had even bothered having him. But lack of sleep and a constant screaming baby, feeling alone doesnt make it easy. Just know we are all thinking of you. Big hugs to you:hugs:

[bronny-jane]

my dd 2 was like this, it drove me insane, its so stressful and you want to help them:(
dd 2 was lactose intolerent, once i switched formula with her she was better, but she was still a handful, some babies require more attention then others.
i hope it all settles down soon, and you need a break for the night, trust me it will work wonders:D

[faery]

i only have advice about the not wanting to be put down and crying. (we are still going through this at 5 months, although not as bad:rolleyes: )
get a good sling and pop him in there when you think he is ready for sleeping but won't sleep. maybe an upright sling like the hug a bub, if he has reflux or anything he may be more comfy being upright. carry that little one around close to you and he will settle. for 5 months this has been by ds naptime. he sleeps great in it, and won't sleep out of it.
:hugs: to you, hopefully it will pass soon, and maybe the op will help if he is in pain

[Desertress]

This could be completely wrong but i though i might siggest it anyway as anything is worth a try i guess. Do you think he might be teething?
Both my ds started teething a 2 months.... they would cry and scream and not feed or settle properly. ds2 cried all day and half the nigt constantly for about a month when he teethed really bad.

Im not saying this is the problem but i might be worth looking at if you think it could be a [ossibility...... now i might add ds1 didnt get his first tooth till nearly 9 mnths and ds2 was 6 months so you may not see a tooth but maybe try panadol or bongella.

I hope that might help.... good luck

[Spewiesmum]

My DS fed the way yours does. He'd be in tears, I'd be in tears. We found out it was the quality of my milk - he'd feed all day but not be 'filled' so was basically hungry all the time. After seeking (lots of) help, I accepted that I'd have to comp feed him every feed. This really did help him, but devasted me.

If you can make it till his operation in one piece you may be able to eliminate one potential problem. Perhaps see your doctor or CHN for their advice.

[meme]

big :hugs: . the early months of baby life are intense. but you are not alone. i too have been there and it does pass. getting through it one day at a time, or one second, one minute can help.

there can be so many reasons for fussy feeding and unsettled babies, the medical check up could certainly help rule out any medical issues.
another avenue you could try for help and support would be the breastfeeding association. i have always found them quite helpful.

i hope things are better for you soon.

[Milliner]

Oh big :hugs: to you!!!! Ds was like this until we took him to sleep school, we tried everything they said it was reflux but nothing worked it turned out that he was not getting enough sleep!!! it all started when he was a couple of weeks old

Goodluck
:fingerscrossed: hope things settle down!

[ziggie]

Now he has oral thrush too! :banghead:
OMG! Still not coping, house is a pigsty (going to wait for DH to get home so I can clean and tidy up) and we've both been in tears many times today :crying: .
Thanks for all the advice, I really appreciate it.... without you bubhubbians, I'd be a REAL mess!

[Rell]

:hugs: to you. I think most of us have felt a little out of control at sometime.
House work can ALWAYS wait, The most important thing is to look after yourself first.
Crying during feeds sounds like reflux to me. Even if your baby is not throwing up it could still be silent reflux. A trip to the Dr can't hurt.

Hopeing that tomorrow is a better day for you all:hugs: