Mbrwr
04-05-2010, 16:46
I’m new here and I’m in need of some advice as I have no idea what to do… I understand that this may sound silly to some of you but I’m hurting badly and I just need some outside input.
My husband and I have been married 10 years, have a daughter and a son and we have always had this amazing relationship. We’re soul mates and best friends.
9 years ago we met this couple to whom we became friends. Our relationship grew to where we were together all the time, our kids are best friends. We would have game nights, camping trips, sleepovers. I don’t have a sister so I was elated to have such a good friend.
Well around last October I’ve noticed that she started dressing up more, always wearing high hills and pants tucked up her butt. I’ve also noticed that my husband was noticing it as well. We spent new years together and several times I noticed my husband looking at her. He even made a comment about how nice her butt looked to me and her. This past January I finally had enough and confronted him. He admitted to looking at it, that he thinks it looks really nice. He said that he didn’t think about her at all when we were not together but every time we were together he would look. Every time he knew they were coming over he would wonder how she would dress and hope she would wear those pants. But he also said he was sorry and knows he shouldn’t have been looking at her and that at the end it was starting to bother him. So he says he started removing himself from the room whenever she was there so he wouldn’t be tempted to look at her butt. Which really hurts me because I know he couldn’t stay in the same room with her and not look. . To make matters worse I talked to her about it. I didn’t say he was looking at her but I said that the way she was dressing made me uncomfortable. She did not change and our relationship started to fade away. We don’t call each other anymore but we still get together because we have so many friends in common, and every time I’m around them I feel terrible. I feel sick to my stomach.
He says it was a thoughtless act... that he shouldn't have done it, that he's a jerk, etc... But nothing he says makes me feel better. I still think that he should have thought about us, about me, about hurting me.
This situation has been going on since January, we cry all the time, both him and I. I feel no happiness, I’m mad, I’m livid with the whole thing and I don’t know what to do. He feels terrible and I believe him when he says he would never hurt me again but I can’t get over what happened. I feel like they both betrayed my trust and took advantage of me. She dressed like that because she wanted attention and it kills me that she got it from my husband.
Sorry for the vent but I just need to hear someone on the outside tell me what to make of this situation because I’m emotionally exhausted. L
My husband and I have been married 10 years, have a daughter and a son and we have always had this amazing relationship. We’re soul mates and best friends.
9 years ago we met this couple to whom we became friends. Our relationship grew to where we were together all the time, our kids are best friends. We would have game nights, camping trips, sleepovers. I don’t have a sister so I was elated to have such a good friend.
Well around last October I’ve noticed that she started dressing up more, always wearing high hills and pants tucked up her butt. I’ve also noticed that my husband was noticing it as well. We spent new years together and several times I noticed my husband looking at her. He even made a comment about how nice her butt looked to me and her. This past January I finally had enough and confronted him. He admitted to looking at it, that he thinks it looks really nice. He said that he didn’t think about her at all when we were not together but every time we were together he would look. Every time he knew they were coming over he would wonder how she would dress and hope she would wear those pants. But he also said he was sorry and knows he shouldn’t have been looking at her and that at the end it was starting to bother him. So he says he started removing himself from the room whenever she was there so he wouldn’t be tempted to look at her butt. Which really hurts me because I know he couldn’t stay in the same room with her and not look. . To make matters worse I talked to her about it. I didn’t say he was looking at her but I said that the way she was dressing made me uncomfortable. She did not change and our relationship started to fade away. We don’t call each other anymore but we still get together because we have so many friends in common, and every time I’m around them I feel terrible. I feel sick to my stomach.
He says it was a thoughtless act... that he shouldn't have done it, that he's a jerk, etc... But nothing he says makes me feel better. I still think that he should have thought about us, about me, about hurting me.
This situation has been going on since January, we cry all the time, both him and I. I feel no happiness, I’m mad, I’m livid with the whole thing and I don’t know what to do. He feels terrible and I believe him when he says he would never hurt me again but I can’t get over what happened. I feel like they both betrayed my trust and took advantage of me. She dressed like that because she wanted attention and it kills me that she got it from my husband.
Sorry for the vent but I just need to hear someone on the outside tell me what to make of this situation because I’m emotionally exhausted. L