New to B.H & need advice for non sleeping 12yr old boy..any ideas??

[Bossof3Sweeties]

:wave:Hi to all ,
I am new to this site in the hope of finding some advice for my son of 12, who says he's not sleeping, and to look at the bags under his eyes you could certainly say he is not sleeping well :no:. I have found it difficult to get any real help by just googling and I do prefer to "speak" to REAL parents. I have asked the usual questions of my son, is there something worrying you? How is school? All the usual stuff! And I have tried some of my usual bag of tricks, warm shower B4 bed, no tv/computer etc B4 bed, just lie still and relax & B4 you know you'll be asleep. He's tried exercise earlier in the day (to try to tire him out) and we have also tried quiet music on his ipod. I am puzzled by this as normally, my son included, my children are pretty good sleepers (since birth..lucky me) Are there any parents here who have had the same problem or anyone with any ideas, help would be much appreciated. Thanks!!:yes:
Sorry for the long post but mum's at her wits end:confused:

[Dannielle]

Poor thing. If he will let you (depends on how desperate he is I guess cause it might seem a bit girly) then lavender oil is meant to be really good and is meant to relax the mind and the body. Or you could have some in the loungeroom if he wont have it in his bedroom.

I can't think what they are called but there are those little bottles of the oil with sticks you stick in that release the smell in the room that are meant to be good. We went through a stage for quite a while where we used lavender oil for DD2 for night terrors. We used to drop a few drops under her pillow and around the room each night.

[Chub Chub]

yep lavendar is awesome for calming.

Have you thought of getting some professional massages for him?

Poor mite. Hope he gets some shut eye soon.

[Dannielle]

Oh, and before bed some lavender oil on the temples, across the forehead and at the back of the neck is meant to help with insomnia, stress, tension and even headaches/migranes.

[Chub Chub]

I was also thinking when I was around that age I would wake up with excruiating pain due to growing. Do you think that maybe an issue? I had pain in my legs and back. Apparently it is quite common and really painful.

Just a thought.

[shelle65]

I had major sleeping problems as a kid - and the more I worried about getting to sleep the worse it got. I would be watching the clock and panicking as it got later and later. I had it in my head that if I didn't get a certain amount of sleep, bad things would happen (I think it started with an innocent comment from my Mum that I took way out of proportion as kids tend to do).

[Pax]

Would he have access to any caffeine based drinks

red bull
coke
anything like that?

Rescue Remedy in lozenges works for my son to help him sleep, he is 13 soon.:hugs:

[Bossof3Sweeties]

:shakehands: Thanks so much for the suggestions for my :sleeping: 12 yr. old. I will try the lavender oil suggestion, that didn't even occur to me (& I am migraine sufferer who uses a multi oil blend stick on my neck etc for releasing tension) Oh der!

I have thought of the massage suggestion (for his back trouble, unrelated issue but he went hmm ok mum) he would go if I exert a little pressure, he is an awesome kid!:yes:. So he will do what I ask, I might give that a go too, I might go with him hee, great massage therapy place right near us, great chairs, try that first. I don't want to go too heavy or serious being that he is only a kid and still growing. It isn't growing pains either, only a little bit of trouble with that sometimes and a warm bath fixes that!

It did start to be that worry factor Shelle65, as you said night after night I can't sleep....etc. And that has played a big role in it, but hopefully with the trial of these great suggestions it might help ease his worry and see him finally get some real and productive sleep time.

No to the caffeine drinks Morrigan I do not let my kids have any of those type of drinks (coke maybe for a treat once in awhile) I have heard too many horror stories about kids and these "mother" style drinks it makes you shudder.

:yelclap:Thanks so much for the great suggestions and keep them coming if anyone thinks of any others (might be handy if the other ideas don't help) I really appreciate, no one likes their kids to look and be so stressed through lack of sleep.
P.S Love the avatar Chub Chub, my friends and I have these fundraiser cookie dough that we have been scoffing (very naughty) and messaging each other about and that quote sums us up right now.:yes:
Thanks again :thumbsup:

[~Temet Nosce~]

You could try a natural herbal sleeping aid like Valerian, I would think they would be safe for a 12 yr old.

[Bossof3Sweeties]

Thank you Kiakai for your suggestion, I am going to give these all a go and fingers crossed something will help DS12.
:thumbsup:

[studyingECS]

Right now I'm going through another bout of insomnia so I can relate to him:hugs:.

First time I started using, a herbal insomnia releif spray I got at the chemist, I think mentally it made me think that it was making me tired rather then actually doing anything to my system, but hey it was worth a try.

At the moment though I have no real suggestions as warm showers and relaxing music etc did not work for me either.

I just hope that you find a solution soon.:hugs:

[Bossof3Sweeties]

Hi studyingECS,
Thanks for your comment, and warm wishes for my 12yr. I wish you good luck with your sleeping (or should say non sleeping) problems, :( it makes it so hard to function at all let alone enjoy your life to the full when you aren't properly rested.
Good luck and take care :hugs:
xxBo3S

[03mum]

Hi my 12 yr old doesn't sleep when he's worrying about things, he had a problem with some boys at school a while ago which he didn't tell us about until I managed to get him to tell me after weeks of me knowng something wasn't rite, maybe it could be friend issues that hes not telling you about.
Hope you work things out soon:)

[Myztik]

I was also going to suggest Valerian, it worked for me when I was younger.

Also if none of these suggestions work then may I suggest speaking to a GP or Pead about the issues. My 8yr old was struggling to get to sleep for a month or so and his pead prescribed Melatonin which worked wonders. He took it for 3mnths and now is back to falling asleep easy as pie. His mood and temperament improved dramatically as did his school work :thumbsup:

[Bossof3Sweeties]

Thank you very much Myztik & 03mum for your comments and support for my very :sleeping: boy, we are giving some of the suggestions a try and :fingerscrossed: they will ease his tiredness and give his "real" personality a chance to reemerge :laughing:.
Will post back if there is any improvement!
Thanks again some for the help.Have a great day...:hugs:

[flowerfae]

OK, i'll go a little outside the square!

If you are sure it's not stress related then maybe medical? He isn't anemic? What about what foods he is eating?

If you google you will also find that black under the eyes can be related to food intolerances.

My DD used to suffer from this, have trouble sleeping and when she did it was very restless. Changes in her diet helped no end.

Lavender is also great.

Kirsty

[Bossof3Sweeties]

:wave:flowerfae,
Thankyou for your reply to my post, I have thought about taking my son to the doctors and I will be making a trip there as soon as I can. I didn't think about food or about him being possibly anemic. So they are things I will be talking to his doctor and find out what could be causing this lack of sleep.
On the other side he is (at present and keeping :fingerscrossed:) sleeping quite well in just the last few days and he actually looks rested.:smiliedance:
I will be still investigating what is going on....but I am hopeful.
Thankyou again for your thoughts especially because I hadn't thought of these as possible trouble makers.
:)