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Ja09
24-03-2010, 15:51
I wasnt sure where to post this but I am so frustrated.
A bit of background DD has been having big sleeping dramas over the last 8 weeks, we put her down to sleep, once she shows tired signs (this is at night time) she does not have a set bed time and has never gone to bed early which does not bother us. 3 hours later every single night she is awake, not just stirring awake but wakes up screaming, she used to stir awake and then get herself back to sleep but not anymore. We tried night light, teddy bears, too hot, too cold, teething so we give panadol or nurofen and that makes no difference. She would thrash and throw herself around the cot, headbut walls concrete and biting. She did have an amber teething necklace on but didn’t seem to be helping at the moment so i took it off.
It can take hours to settle her. We have had family staying here on and off due to floods in their home, so we try not to let her carry on too much as they work so we have been putting her in our bed. For a few weeks she was thrashing around in our bed too, hitting us, headbutting us biting, screaming, which ends up with me in tears sobbing and DH upset because I am upset. Now she gets in there and goes straight to sleep.
We stumbled across something about grapes and people having reactions to them as they are extremely high in salicylates, amines and natural MSG. She would eats loads of grapes everyday, and before bed, since stopping these the headbutting and thrashing has stopped and biting has improved.

I dont want to do the full elimination diet with her as I am already struggling with food ideas just cutting out or reducing the food she eats that contain additives. I have changed our bread so it does not have 282 or vinegar in it, I have changed cheese so it does not have 160B in it, she still has bananas, and I have been giving her pears but last night woke up screaming again and this time had heaps of wind also. We had sausages for tea which i didnt want to give her but had no other options in the house. She has also started drinking milk, never been interested before, I have been giving her normal milk, but have just changed to a2. Is it the food, teeth, milk I am so confused.
She is walking, so not milestone related. I have taken her to the doctor and ruled out ear infections, her breath smelt a bit funny for a while there but I have ruled out any throat issues. Do you think I should seek a referral to a paed?
She is an excellent eater, there is very little that she wont eat. Is there a test that she can have done to check for food Intolerance rather than doing an elimination diet.
Some days she is very clingy doesn’t know what she wants, whinging or just crying, wants to be picked up then when you pick her up she goes stiff.
I am 25 weeks pregnant tired very upset and confused and I don’t know where to go next. All i know is I want her to sleep like she used to before this next baby comes along.

KatiesMum
24-03-2010, 16:22
Its hard to say.

The whingy whiney-ness simply sounds like tiredness to me - ie a result of her waking up and night time.

How are her poo's? could it be constipation/wind/digestion related?

To be honest, if you have tried all the usual settling techniques and you feel that it is more than just not being able to settle, I would go with the elimination diet.

Start with the usual type things first, so go with
- dairy free
- gluten free
- try and cut down additives and preservatives

and see how that goes.

Banana's can cause constipation and have high salicylates as well so I would perhaps cut those out and just giver her apples, pears, peaches etc.

As for teeth - normally if you give panadol or nurofen for teeth you will notice the difference in sleeping ... they will numb the pain and she will sleep. If you have given these and she is still thrashing for 2 or 3 hours I would suggest its not teething pain.

I would book her in to the paed and ask for suggestions from them as well.

Angroc
24-03-2010, 17:00
Is your daughter like this during the day too? And how old is she?

Does she sleep well during the day or is it just night time that you are having problems with? Def ask for a paed's opinion as there may be something else behaviour related that could be the issue.

Misschief
24-03-2010, 18:05
I think that if you were to go to a paed first, he/she will advize you to do the elimination diet as well.
So perhaps try that first and if that still doesn't give you an answer to her behavior, then go to a paed.

I hope for you, that her behaviour improves soon. It must be very hard being pregnant and having to deal with a very upset toddler as well :hugs::hugs:

Ja09
24-03-2010, 20:36
katiesmum - her poos are fine they were loose but not runny for a month which I have put down to the amount of grapes/fruit she was eating, as they are now solid but not hard so not constipated.
I was told that the bananas were low in salicylates and I think the pears give her a belly ache

Angroc - yes she is like this most days, happy one minute tantrum the next, she only usually has one day sleep which is usually but not always an hour

EdensMama
25-03-2010, 14:50
hey there,

Most people here have talked over the food ideas and possible solutions thereof, so I'm just going to pop in a couple of completely different ideas!

Firstly, how old is your DD?

In my honest opinion- to me it sounds like your sweetie is acting really tired. If she's under 2 the 1hr sleep during the day may not be enough and then going until 8pm etc at night could just be too much for her and then she's overtired and cannot settle because she is too overwrought.

I have a 16 month old DD and we've just spent 2 months travelling all over the USA and the two 14 hour flights, plus the time difference have been an interesting challenge. My DD went from being completely chilled and placid when it came to bedtime- to the child from hell where she would spend hours just screaming the house down. For a while I thought maybe it was an ear infection, sickness, time difference, thirsty, hungry etc etc and would go in a try to settle her and then it was even worse. I was all over the place wondering what to do. This wasn't helping her.

Finally, I thought to myself 'I know she is so tired and she needs sleep, but now she is used to me being unsure and coming in a out etc that she is now unsure too'. So, I set aside a week and expected terrible trauma and went back to my really strict routine of naptime during the day at a certain time and a 6.30pm bedtime without compromise. I also decided not to go into her when she was crying (it was her angry cry too!). I knew she was perfectly fine- not thirsty, hungry, hurt, sick, cold, hot etc). It was just her having a tantrum essentially.

The first day she stood in her crib and screamed bloody murder nonstop for an hour. It was hard, but when she realised that I wasn't coming in all worried and upset, she finally got over herself and went to sleep! It has taken me only 3 days and now we have beautiful 3hr naptime sleeps during the day and 13 hours sleep at night again. She is a different child as a result- happy, contented, placid, funny and energetic. I am amazed at what the difference is. Its crazy how the combination of not enough sleep and an unsure mother can really affect the equilibrium of everything!

If I were you I would consider just having a bit more of a routine so that she can then expect to know what is coming next, and I would try and put aside all your fear about what is going on and decide that you know best and bedtime is bedtime and don't second guess yourself from your plan (whatever you decide that might be) for at least a few days, if that doesn't work, you can always try something else.

Just food for thought!! :)

Ja09
25-03-2010, 17:50
Edensmama - thanks so much for that post, it made perfect sense. DD is 15 months and her bedtime is about 10pm (if she goes to bed any earlier she wont get to see her daddy for very long and she has always gone to bed late which doesnt bother us as she doesnt rise early either) I agree with you that 1 hour in all that time is not enough (she wakes about 8am -9am usually).
I do feel we need more of a routine so I am trying to come up with something that works, it will probably all have to change in a few months when the new baby comes along anyway.