secondary infertility

[jbearsmum]

Hi everyone, very new to chat rooms. But found this one and read a lot of feedback and thought I would give it a try. Have 4 year old boy ( concieved naturally) and trying for NO.2. Doing cycle 2 of IVF ( male factor). First time only 3 eggs, 1 et ( no luck) Put on mega dose of Gonal but still don't feel like anything happening. Go for foliicle scan tomorrow. Not feeling confident. Anyone else had low quantity of eggs and any suggestions??
Would really appreciate some feedback. TA :)

[SuperWoman]

Hi there, I never had low quantity of eggs, but I have been through enough IVF cycles to try and help you out. My hubby and I did IVF (male factor) and while doing treatment he underwent some acupunture which we really believe helped us out with the fertilizing of our eggs. I have read alot about acupunture with IVF treatment for men and women and it does have a high success rate. Maybe look into that as well. Hope it helps a little. Im sure some of the other girls will have some more advice for you hun. Take care.:hugs:

[jbearsmum]

Thanks so much for the reply. When your doing IVF you feel like your the only one in the world going through it. But I'm amazed at how many people have problems, and it helps soooooooo much to talk to people who actually know what you are going through! Thanks again :)

[SuperWoman]

Thats ok hun:) . Come and join the "First IVF cycle in a few days, part 2" thread. Lots of girls doing cycles and treatment as well, and loads of support, we all know how everyone feels!! The girls are great, please join us.:yes: :yes:

[Kiwigirlinoz]

Hi JBearsmum- welcome!

We too are battling secondary infertility. we have a beautiful and wise little dd who just turned 5. We are so lucky to have her. She was naturally conceived post laparoscopy for endo and we started trying for #2 after she turned 2.

It has taken us a while to get to IVF- no luck so far but some encouraging BFPs and very early miscarriages so something was working.

I find the it frustrating with people assuming you are choosing not to have another (because you have 1 and surely should have had another by now) so you get the dumb questions all the time. In addition because I work and have a good career people presume I am putting my career first.

But then the hardest conversation I have had was with my dd who asked why we couldn't have a baby who stayed with us and didn't go home and was it because she would be a bad sister?:gloomy: I have had a talk with her to explain babies are gifts and sometimes we don't get given them no matter how much we want them. I have also explained to her that our bodies sometimes don't work the way we want them to lol!

Anyhow welcome - I am sure you will find the ladies here sooo supportive and full of great advice and info.

[mercimum]

Dear jbearsmum.
First time on bub hub. I know where you are comeing from. We to are going through the same thing. We have a beutifull 3yr old. Two months off starting ivf and fell pregnant naturally. It took 2 1/2 yrs for that. Now moving on to no 2. 2 1/2 yrs again, this time no luck. We did 3 rounds of IUI had 14 follicles each time. So then we started IVF, pick up was on wed 14 follicles :thumbsup: . Transfer day, 45mins before, sorry your embies have degenerated. Poor egg quality :gloomy: . I am 34 years of age and feal like somebody in my family has died. I just wonder how you go back again and again.
Its also hard talking to people about secondary infertilty. What I always get is oh well you have one beatifull daughter. The thing is that I know that and are very gratefull, but I can have one why can't I have two.

[jbearsmum]

Hi mercimum and kiwigirlinoz,
Sorry it taken a while to get back to you, had a busy weekend!
Man!!!! are we all in the same ballpark or what! I don't know how many times I've heard...well at least you have one! I wish I had a dollar! I think people think they are saying the right thing, but some just have no idea!!! PEOPLE JUST LOVE TO PRESUME!!!
I think it just that at the moment the choice has been taken away from us. It quite frustrating as James was so easy to conceive, so we just expected the same for number two. Having read through this website I am completely amazed at how many people do have problems... we are not alone.

Re the IVf I think the worst part is waiting to see if there enough eggs ( which is were I am at at the moment) and then waiting to see if they have fertilised. I was very stressed at that point. oNly one made it through from our first round and I'm not sure that I will have enough eggs this time??? The way i'm dealing with the loss each time is trying to look at the big picture! I know it sounds really corny. But I do my head in if I try and think about too much each time. I seem to have a day or two of sadness and then I know I have to keep going. Whats scaring me is if I get to a point where we need to stop. How do you actually do that??? Trying not to think about that situation yet?

Kiwigirlinoz I think you explained it beautifull to you dd. It just breaks your heart to think that they think things like that! As long as its not copyrighted I think I will use that next time James asked about a baby, which he quite often does!

Where are you both from and what the next stage ( if you don't mind me asking)
I thinkI'll be doing EPU end of this week or early next.

Take care and stay well and positive.
Good things do come to good people. I truly believe that!
Jbearsmum :)

[mercimum]

hi jbearsmum.
I hope that you had a great weekend. Firstly thankyou for doing a reply. This is all new to me, and 1st ivf attempt, so I guess I need It will be okay. Still guttered that I have poor egg quality, I am only 34. We try to keep telling ourselves that it was just a bad batch this cycle. Dr tsaltas wants us to wait 6-8wks before we try a flare cycle. I guess that one will be harder, the waiting to find out if the embies are ok:shame: . I live in geelong so it has been an exhausting 2 weeks, travelling up to melbourne every 2 days.
We have the wait so need to do something to better my chances for next time. Of I go to do some accupuncture and chinese herbs:shame: . Hope to hear from you soon.
P.s isn't bardysmum amazing she gives lots of hope and love in her messages. Every thread I go to there she is.:kiss:
mercimum

[jbearsmum]

HI mercimum,

Are you doing ivf through Melbourne IVF??
If so... so am I. My dr is Dr Gronow!.

I seem to have a bit of an egg problem too but its quantity.
I go back for another scan on wednesday morning to see if there are enough there to go ahead with the EPU. So understand the stress your talking about! Our first epu I only got 3 eggs. 2 didn't make it but the third was a big healthy one but for some reason didn't work! Whats a flare cycle???? I'm also very interested in doing some accupucture and the herbs, so let me know if you get any good info! I go to a naturopath every couple of months and she told me that while going through the stimulation cyle and prior to it that we should be eating lots of animal protein. eggs cheese, red meat, salmon and tuna chicken etc etc which helps with the eggs developement! so thats my bit of advice at the moment!

And yes bradysmum is amazing.... all of the girls are fantastic. I only joined the site last week and already feel at home. The support from everyone is amazing no matter what you are going through. I don't feel so alone anymore.

I'll keep everything crossed for you and will let you know if I hear anything that may help you too.
Hopefully hear from you soon

Jbearsmum xx

[mercimum]

dear jbearsmum.
Yes I am doing ivf at melbourne ivf. I probably have seen u there, and smiled at you:) .
My girlfriend whom I saw today went to this accupuncturist can't say for certain if it was her that helped her but she is know 18 wks. Also her friend swears by her. Its worth a try.
Maybe if we put your egg quality and my egg quantity together, we may actually get something viable:) .
If you go into the accupuncture thread somebody has suggested somebody in melb. I also had heard of the protein thing, thanks again for reiterating it though everything helps at this stage.
A flare cycle I think is done without the synarel? Dr tsalstas only mentioned it on frid,(was not in the right frame of mind to listen, too upset) I guess we will find out more closer to the time.:shame:

Hope both of us some encouraging news soon.
Speak soon. Grow eggs grow. xxx mercimum

[jbearsmum]

HI Mercimum

Just thought I would say hello. Had my scan this morning and can home very sad!
Only 4 follies ( 1 big and the rest I don't think I will be big enough when we do epu. Looks like that will happen on friday or saturday! So I think I will be very lucky to even get one out of this cycle. And speaking with the Dr not sure as to where we can go from after this. Thinks its a combination of poor response and also my age ( 37).
So feeling very crappy! Trying to find accupuncturist at the moment and spoke with my naturapath so she thinks theres lots we can do! But losing lots of hope at the moment

Hope your feeling better
Take care

Talk soon
Jbearsmum :(

[mercimum]

Hi jbearsmum.
I am sitting here reading your message to me crying a few tears. I guess I can now say that I know how you are feeling, (guttered) and if you really sat and thought about it you would break down completely. It's not meant to be like this we go through menopause at later in life so we automatically think we can still produce up until then.
I wonder how your dh is copeing with this as well. My dh's only concern right now is how to comfort me.
My thoughts of you are very much on my mind, even though we have not met.
My screen saver says that good things come to those who wait. I don't know if I can quite believe that, but I have to believe in something.
Please keep me in touch. I will be very anxious to hear from u soon. Take care.
lots of bears hugs
mercimum.

[jbearsmum]

Hey again Mercimum,
Thanks for your thoughts
I read your message on the other thread and I too have booked in to see accurpuncturist/chinese medicine! Going to se a lady in Stkilda road tomorrow @ 3pm so hopefully she can suggest something. I know everyone says stay positive . I still have a slight chance for this one to work , but I need to have plan b in my head!
My Dr sort of left me feeling there was nowhere else to go with him. Said we'll speak if we need to after this cycle lets just concentrate on this one! Which I am trying to do.... but I need to know where to go after this one! I spoke with my Naturopath and she said this lady was very good and hard to get into so maybe a good sign that she had an appointment open up for tomorrow!

I know that once I have the OPU on Saturday I will be completely stressing to see if any make it to Monday morning. I can't believe you yours stopped 45 mins before ET.

I am a big believer in things happen for a reason, but sometime for the life of me I just can't figure out why.

I will stay in touch, you have been a great support already just in these last few days
Thank you

Take care and will chat soon!
Jbearsmum xx

[mercimum]

hi jbearsmum.
Just checkin in to see how you got on today? I was thinkin of you. I would be interested to hear as to what she said?
I hope that your spirits were abit higher today. Lots of thoughts and hugs on the other thread. I am just blown away at how addicted i am to this forum.
Hope you have some encouraging news soon. Have you heard anything about you opu?
Wait with baited breath.

kerri

[macmum]

HI Mercimum

Just thought I would say hello. Had my scan this morning and can home very sad!
Only 4 follies ( 1 big and the rest I don't think I will be big enough when we do epu. Looks like that will happen on friday or saturday! So I think I will be very lucky to even get one out of this cycle. And speaking with the Dr not sure as to where we can go from after this. Thinks its a combination of poor response and also my age ( 37).
So feeling very crappy! Trying to find accupuncturist at the moment and spoke with my naturapath so she thinks theres lots we can do! But losing lots of hope at the moment

Hope your feeling better
Take care

Talk soon
Jbearsmum :(

Hi Jbearsmum

I hope it goes well for you Friday/Saturday :fingerscrossed: .

I went through the same problem and 2 days before my hcg trigger injection the Dr said I had 2 reasonable size follies and 2 small ones. I felt that he was going to stop the cycle at that point, but gave me another 2 gonal injections (making 18 in total - yuk) and said the nurses will ring with your time for the trigger. I was surprised, he was carrying on.

At the pick up they did take 4, but only 2 were ok (had ICSI). I had them both implanted and after the first blood test was told you have pregnancy hormones, but they felt the count was not high enough. After two more tests the count is rising and I have begun to feel sooooo tired. Another blood test is booked next week and then the first scan.

My OH is so excited, but I am taking 1 day at a time and waiting to see what happens at the first scan.

I really wish you luck, I found it the hardest time out of all the cycle.

Macmum

[Tonysgirl]

Macmum,

Hi, just wanted to wish you the best of luck for your next blood test and scan. Posting your story I am sure has given others so much hope - that when it looks like the cycle may be a failure to not give up hope.

I understand you being cautious but am hoping it all works out for you.

Donna
xx

[macmum]

Thanks Tonysgirl, at the moment it just feels like a waiting game which you are the only one going through it.

After finding this forum, it has amazed me how many couples go through ivf and how many times they will try it.

I have only been in Oz for just over 8 months, so finding this site has been great, as I have no idea about the hospitals, obs, midwives etc.

Good luck to everyone :fingerscrossed:

Macmum
x

[jbearsmum]

Hi kerri & Macmum,
Well feeling better and a bit more postive. Felt like a complete lunatic on Wednesday, but feeling more postive now. I went to the accupuncturist yesterday and came out feeling quite good. She said I have two options if this cycle doesn't work ( which finger crossed it does) .She can work as an IVF support by just doing accupunture or if I chose to have a break for a couple of months to go onto the chinese herbs ( hubby too) and build my body up that way. she says in chinese medicine the import organs are the kidneys and the liver and these need to be sting and working correctly to achieve pregnancy. The herbs build up all the organs in you body that are more than likely not working properly and the accupuncture get the energy in you body flowing to where it should be. Also she said it was really important for the lining of the uterus to be as thick as possible to make it as cosy as possible for the egg to embed into!

So after all that I came away feeling better. There is still a chance this month so I'm focussing on that at the moment.
Mac mum it sounds so similar what you are going through with the egg issue. I have everything crossed for you and hope all goes well. Please keep me posted and please send a message if you need to talk.

Kerri, thanks so much for you support. I never thought I would get into the whole chat room thing but it has helped me soooooo much. I keep on quoted experiences to by hubby that I have read on here from the girls. So I think he thinks I'm pretty obsessed too. OPU is happening Saturday morning 7.30 ( so many other things I wouyld rather be doing on a Saturday morning) and if we get any eggs transfer will happen on Monday. Tossing up at the moment if we are lucky enough to get 2 whether we put both in or just one! Doctor is reccommending just one but I think thats just him being a doctor!
Will make the decision when we now whats happening.
How are you feeling, hopefully a bit better.When do you see accupuncturist and dsoctors next? Lets know when you get a sec

Take care of yourselves
So glad we have hooked up through this forum
Leanne XX

[mercimum]

Hi jbearsmum.
I am so happy that you got some good news from the accunturist. I was waiting so eagerly to hear if they could help you. I am more than eager to go now. I have a little smile of hope on my face right now. Did you come out of there feeling that she could improve your chances.
Maybe you may not need to go down that path if all goes well on the weekend:fingerscrossed: . I will be thinking of you.

I guess you will be pretty busy on the weekend, so I hope to catch up mon. I am working, so I will be racing home to read the threads( this is bad). We have already gone over our monthy mg limit, but I just tell my Dh its therapy and awhole lot cheaper(ha).

Okay jbearsmum take care.
kerri

[jbearsmum]

Hey Mercimum

Yep I did come out feeling much better about the chances of things working!
I went there thinking that I was getting too old and missed my chance at having another but she assured me that age had nothiing to do with it! So that made me feel good to begin with. Also in her opinion because we have conceived naturally and have had tests checking that everything is ok with the ovaries and tubes etc. That there is NO REASON why it won't happen again. She said my body already knows what to do! But basically she said due to already having a child life get so much more bust and our bodies get run down easier, thats where the chinese medicine comes into it by building up the areas that need to hand! But even by just doing the accupuncture without the herbs I feel will help a lot too. See sadi that it directs the energy in your body to where it needs to be. So that was really positive aswell. I feel like it was chalk and cheese with her thoughts and my doctors.

Thansk for your thoughts
will let you know how I go either Sunday or Monday.

When do you see your accupuncturist?

Have a great weekend and take care

Leanne :)

[jbearsmum]

hi kerri & macmum,

How are you both? Hope you are travelling ok and feeling a bit more positive about things. Just thought I would let you know the latest. Had a ET today at 12pm. Had my EPU on Saturday and got 3 little eggies out, not great but something! spent the weekend stressing as to whether they would fertilise. Went in today and got the news that all had fertilised BUT..... one had not gone past a 2 cell embie, the other was shwoing abnormal things so didn't survive, and the the third one was a great big juicy one! So that was great news. So Nemo has been put in and now we WAIT!. BT on the 28th August!
Going to get some more accupuncture on Thursday so hopefully that will help!
Any news with you Kerri and your accupuncturist visit?

Where abouts are you based Macmum?
and which IVF are you going through?

Anyway lets know the latest with you guys
Looking forward to hearing from you soon

Take care

Jbearsmum xx

[macmum]

Hi Jbearsmum

Glad the ET went well, :fingerscrossed: for 2 weeks time.

I am in based in Melbourne and using the Freemasons hospital for ivf.

Feeling a bit nervous about BT tomorrow, I can feel that things are moving on, but after the nurses saying that my count was not high enough, I just hope that things are ok! I have read various ivf sites and I feel my count is average. Will have to wait for the scan, which I think will be next week.

I have just done the Down Regulation Cycle.

Look after yourself and 'no jogging' :D

Take care

Macmum
x

[jbearsmum]

HI macmum

I'm in melbourne and goinig through melbounre IVF too

Whos your doctor if you don't mind me asking?
I'm going through Dr Gronow!
We've probably sat opposite each other reading those crappy magazines!

Stay positive for BT tomorrow!
i'll be thinking of you.
Lets know how you go

Take care

Jbearsmum
xx

[macmum]

Hi Jbearsmum

I am going through Dr McBain, who has been great.

I know what you mean about the magazines, I just flick through and look at the pictures most of the time!

We probably have sat opposite each other at some time, I was there 2 - 3 times a week at one point.

Oh well, back there again tomorrow! At least I know my way around Melbourne a bit better now :laughing: .

Take care

Macmum
xx

[mercimum]

Hi jbearsmum.
Hi sweetie. had my fingers crossed for you on mon. Raced home to hear some great news 1 transfered. I bet you felt relieved for at least 1 to have made it? It only takes one.
I am having my accupuncture app thurs night. I am hopeing that she will beable to help me? Did u watch aca last night on chinese medicine/accupuncturist and fertility? My DH thinks that this is a sign. God I hope that he is right. I am having a mix of emotions at the moment. My sis rang the other night, was telling her about it(poor egg quality). I said to her that if all else fails we will have to look for a donor. Her response oh are you going to go that far. I am thinking not the answer I need to hear right know, especially because it would be her eggs that I would be after. My beautifull new friend/neighbour has offered for us to have her eggs, she is as fertile as a rabbit. We just hope that we don't get to that:fingerscrossed: .
How are you feeling today?

I guess our main concern right now is that my DH is having a back operation next friday at the epworth. Having a the rest of a disc removed the plate and screws. He doesnot do sick well at all, so I guess if I get through all this I can do anything.
Anyway off for my walk now speak soon.
kerri.

Dear macmum. That is absolutly wonderfull news for you & dh.I hope everything goes well, keep us updated on your progress. take care. kerri

[jbearsmum]

Hey kerri
thanks for the thoughts. I was stressed all weekend hoping that we had at least one to put in. So now the waiting begins. I did watch ACA last night, was wrapped with what they said about the accupuncture. Glad to hear that your going on Thursday night, I have another appointment on Thursday during the day. She told me to come back if I had an embie put in and she would do some more on me. So hopefully it will help. I think ist great that we both had appointments prior to this airing otherwise it would have been really hard to get in I think! I think it is a sign!!!!! And a damn good sign!!!!

Try not to think to much about what your sister said. I think sometimes people just don't know what to say when your going through ****. In general people don't deal well with stressful conversations and they say strange things cos they don't know what else to say. In particular if they have no idea what you are going through. As for you neighbour.... what can I say, what a very special person. Hang onto her... we all need friends like that!

I'm feeling ok at the moment, I think still a little sore from the EPU. I said to DH last night... it is a nice thought that I won't have any doctors poking and proding me for the next 2 weeks!
Yucky news about your DH , hope it all goes well and hes not too bad after. My theory is that men in general don't do sick good at all! As my DH says if men had to go through all the things that we do to have a baby, the worlds population would be alot smaller!

Also I was speaking with my naturopath again today filling her in on the weekend.
You probably know this but thought I would let you know just in case. Make sure your iron levels are ok or you take an iron supplement. She said this is almost as important as taking folate for a health pregnancy. So I had to go and get some today!

Anyway.... I've been raving on. I hope everything goes well on Thursday. Lets know how you go!
Take care and hopefully talk soon

Leanne T xxx:wave:

[jbearsmum]

HI Mercimum

Hope everything goes Ok tonight with the accupuncturist!
I hope its a really positive experience for you!
I was at mine again today and fell asleep on the table! T'was very relaxing!

Hope you feeling ok
Hopefully talk to you soon


Hi mac mum

How are you feeling?
Has it started to sink as yet.

Whats next for you??

Talk soon
Take care
Jbearsmum xx