Whats with peoples comments about my DD

[Sugarplum2809]

During my pregnancy I had people looking at me and asking if "there are twins in there" and BIG BABY!

http://www.bubhub.com.au/community/forums/showthread.php?t=300347

Soon as they see DD :cloud9: they say "shes huge" or they think that she is 3 months. I reply and say yeah she was 4.1kg when she was born. I am happy that she wasn't underweight or premature.

I got annoyed :hair: when some ladys 3rd child was born a day before DD said that my baby is huge and was telling someone else that her DD is not even 4kg at 7 weeks. My family said that I am too sensitive and that I should take it as a compliment that my DD is a good size.

Can't anyone ever say something nice anymore. I hardly get "shes cute":bee:. I also had somone say that she has mature features - what does that mean? Or that she looks like a boy.

Why is it that I see the cuteness in every other baby?

[kylza]

My Ds was 4kg at birth with a mop of hair, every one told me he looked mature as well and that he was an old soul who had been here before.
It really didn't worry me, I know when I first saw him myself I thought OMG! Are you sure this big haired chubby kid just popped out of me! :laughing:
People just state the obvious, just think yourself lucky you have a big healthy bubba :)

[Chunkydunks]

DS was 4.08kg. I don't remember the comments about his size but I'm sure there were some. i just remember the comments about how cute he was and how content he was was. You'll remember the nice comments more than the negative.

[Sugarplum2809]

I do have to admit that people are suprised how placid she is.

We had a doctor come home to check her eye, which she said was a blocked tear duct. The doctor was suprised to see how good DD was, she said that when she sees bubs at 7 weeks bub is screaming and crying and mum is stressed out.

It did take me a while to pick up on DD signals. Soon as she wakes I feed her and do not wait for her to cry, and do not let her cry. Although I have had people telling me to let her cry so her lungs can open up (old wives tale). It would be harder to settle afterwards. I do know when she wants to sleep - she starts winging and grizzling. Soon as she does I wrap her and hold her in my arms for 2 mintues and pat her bottom and she sleeps.

[NonnyMouse]

They're not being deliberately mean or insensitive, they're just making an observation. DS was over 4kg when born and looked like a 3 month old in size we got a lot of comments, but of course he WAS a big baby compared to the average, so I just agreed with them and said "yeah, he sure is!"

Now he's under the 3rd percentile for his weight and looks a whole lot younger/smaller than his peers and I get comments about that. "Wow, what a littel baby!" "Wow, he's so advanced!" (because he's walking well but only looks around 6 or 7 months old) etc... and again I just smile and agree with them because, yeah, he's small for his age.

Try not to read too much into the comments - people wanting to make conversation are prone to random and blatantly obvious comments, and in most cases they're just not thinking about the fact that you may be feeling extra sensitive about it.

[elwoodgal]

My DD was 4.6 kilos & was the biggest bub on the ward that week.
I often had people saying what a healthy little fella he was! Even when she was dressed in pink!
I agree with the other comments. Try not to let it get to you. I hope your DD is as healthy as my girl was/is.
My DD turns 5 on Sunday & we still (and probably always will) get comments on how big she is. Not on how cute she is, which of course we think she is! :D

[gothmum]

My DD is the same 4.1kg born and now is 10 weeks and 6kg and 60cm long. I always get comments about how big she is and how much hair she has. Im still not used to the comments i get when out in public.

[sandy cheeks]

Try not to listen to other people, dd has very fine hair and not much lol and so many people say "oh what a cute little boy" (often when she's in pink) I just say no it's a girl. It used to bug me but I know dd is as pretty and girly as a doll, so who cares what they say.
BTW I'm sure your dd is a big cutie pie.

[Deserama]

awww I know how you feel, two of mine were about the 4kg mark....my son went from 9lbs to 11lbs in 3 weeks!!! And yes I got all the comments, but I would just look at them proud as punch and say how healthy they are.

(I've also had a couple of 7lbers too that didn't grow all that fast and got 'she's tiny' too...so it comes either way really.

[SassyMummy]

I wouldn't worry.

Mine was born bigger than yours (4.67kg here), and I got "big baby" comments a lot... but meh. I think it's just an observation. People also comment on small babies.I do - just because they're so little and delicate... which is kinda sweet to me because DD was never a tiny little baby like that. I'm sure people get annoyed when I say it too.

Most people who comment on the size are not doing it because they're trying to hurt you, so I'd just try and not worry about it.l

[cate]

I'm hearing you!

DS was 4.2kg born....but was 5.8kg last week at 5 weeks!

What are you feeding him?
How many months is he?
You shouldn't feed him so much!

All standard comments I hear all the time.....particularly the oldies at Woolies!

I just brush it off and say that he is healthy and happy. Midwife used a lovely phrase...."He's a well covered lad!"

[guerin]

Can't anyone ever say something nice anymore. I hardly get "shes cute":bee:. I also had somone say that she has mature features - what does that mean?

She looks wise and knowing. Well that's my guess.

[Boobycino]

Jasper was 5 kilos by 1 month, 6kgs at 2 months - and continued like this until he was 10 kilos at 7 months.

....


My mum, who is normally wonderful with her advice and guidance implied I was settling Jasper up for childhood obesity! I was shocked and ALMOST hung up on her - she wouldn't let it drop, so I tightly told her I had to go, said good,but and hung up. She did call me the following day to apologies, she was just worried....

But yeah, at 3 weeks, people would go "WEEKS?" thinking I meant months.

Though, its funny when people would go "gee, how big was he when he was born!" and I say "3.5 kilos" they go "oh... okay... hey that's alright"...

But yeah, paed and midwife and CHN all told me I was overfeeding him.

But I was demand feeding him, and he was DEMANDING to be fed 8 times a day.

He still probably between meals, snacks and breast feeds 'eats' that often and he's 15 months old, 13.1 kilos. He's still a BIG boy!

I started automatically when people see Jasper, either new people or people who've not seen him in a while, before they comment I say "I know, he's BIG right?" and then its not them saying it, so they don't say it.

And then they say something else, like, "gee he looks like you." Why thank you:cloud9:



*** oh, and I'm fighting commenting on a friend every time I see her, she's 16 weeks and I just want to say something like "are you sure you're only 16 weeks?" or something dumb, but I bit my tongue, but she seriously looks 6 months pregnant... .... ..... I wont comment!!!! I have foot-in-mouth disease though and sometimes just say whatever dumb thing pops into my head***

[peanutbutter&jelly]

My DD is 12 weeks and 7kg. I get told how big she is too, but I can't help but laugh. She started off at 3.3kg, a little under average but has never lost weight (even in that first week when they're 'meant' to). She's healthy :goodvibes:
Her brother, was born at 3.56, a little over average, and gained for the first few weeks, then due to reflux lost weight and we weekly weighed him. He sat on the 3rd percentile, she's sitting on the 90th. Trust me, its a hell of a lost easier this end of the scale, than weekly weighing and worrying about whether they've gained enough every damn week, then having to grin and bear it when someone asks if you're feeding them enough :hair: Yup, he just then projectile vomits it over my lounge room, thanks :rolleyes:


People will always make comments, its a pain at the best of times :hugs:

[~*clairesmum*~]

Both my children have being 4.1kgs and 4.5kgs and i did get the weight comments but i was just happy that they were a good size n they looked healthy... My sister just had a 5lb 14 n he looks so tiny n skinny

[Bellini]

I agree with Nonny, the people commenting aren't being mean, just observant.

DS is very long, in the 95th percentile for height, but average weight. Most comments I get are "he's so long"!! I think it's normal human behaviour to comment like that :)

[Little-Pink-Hen]

You can't win ppl have opinions and think you want to hear them. My bub was 3.4kgs born which is average I'd say she was born at 37 weeks so ppl said how big she was when she was 7-8 weeks she was still not 4 kilos and is only pushing 7 kilos at 7 months now
ppl are forever say how tiny she is, I used to hate it
ppl would tell me to switch to formula but she was demand fed and some chn told me I was feeding her too much :hair: now I just "yeah" or "she is average/petite" ppl assume she needs to be big as dh and I are both tall and not skinny ppl
just let ppl say it and try not to get to you :hugs:

chel- jasper and lilly weighed the same both fed on demand up to 8 times a day yet at 7 months Jasper was 10kgs and Lilly is 7 kgs we're proof that you can't over bf a bub, birth weight is not a liftime indication of size, breastfed babies are "smaller", feeding on demand sets baby up with bad eating habits :)

[iMischa]

i hear ya! my boo was born 7.5 pounds but got really big really quick, hes a big boy, around 11 kilos at 9 months.. and people always ask how old he is and then the whole 'omg hes huge, omg my 1 yr old isnt that big, omg he's a monster' etc and it does really p1ss me off and upset me... but doesnt matter what i say in return ppl still go on and on... i just fib now and say he is older than what he is, and they still say he is big and i say 'yup he is perfect' and walk off.

*massive hugs*

[CluckySC]

Got the same thing with DS. He was born 3kg, but was 5kg by 6 weeks and was in size 1's by 4 months. I remember taking him out at 6 weeks old and being stopped by a number of people to tell me he's enormous. Felt like telling them perhaps their children were just undersized :p

He's now about to turn 2 and is in size 3's and about 14kg. He's tall but so are many of his friends. He's a gorgeous boy.

People just feel the need to comment on something. Ignore em.

[lovelymum]

You know when I had DS one of the girls in my pre natal class had her DD at the same time. My DS was 2.4 kg and her DD 4.1 kgs and can I tell you her baby looked a WHOLE lot healthier than mine! I would have given my right arm to have a big bouncing bubba, little babies are hard work, hard to feed, hard to settle etc.. Take pride that your body helped you make a wonderful healthy baby as I will always feel a bit sad that my body let me and my baby down :(

[Rileysmuma]

Yeah same here :laughing:

DS was 4.7kgs and was the biggest baby born on the ward that week. We always got "wow what a big healthy bubba you have there" I always took it as a compliment though I would always reply " yup, i do make them well":laughing:

Or id get the other side. People assuming he is older then 8months and saying that he is underdeveloped. That gets me a little frustrated as he already says dadda and mumma although only just started sitting but i dont see that as a bad thing.

We would also get people telling us what a beautiful little girl we had even though he was in blue overalls :laughing::p

[SimplyMum]

A friend of mine has a 4month old DS and he is 10kg. He is a big boy- there's no getting around it. But he's also very cute and extreamly placid (well, when I've seen him anyway). Mum is a GREAT mum! I know that hearing 'he's a big baby' can get a little disheartening, I mean people were asking her if she feeds him steak! :eek: So, although he is a big boy- I try to repeat the other things that pop into my mind when seeing him as well- like how cute he is, and what a placid baby he is and what an awesome mum she is.

One thing I've noticed she does do though is turn what negativity there is in the comment 'Wow- he's a big boy' into a positive. She just replies with, 'I know- we're so proud of him' with a jolly great big smile on her face and very loving eyes.

She really is such a great mum!

[airliesmum]

People just love to comment don't they! It can drive you mad if you let it. My DS was 4.7kg at birth and I have heard it all, things like 'how did he come out of you'. 'what did you eat while pregnant?', 'gee you must have been sore', 'you must have had soooo many stitches' (I had none actually). All comments made by people who I hardly know.
Its funny though cos now he is 10 weeks old and people who know his birthweight see him, I get the opposite....like 'oh hes not THAT big', 'are you sure they weighed him right?' Its like they expect him to be a full grown man already. You just cant win! He is VERY long, so actually doesnt look as chubby as his weight suggests.
Sorry for the rant, but I am soooo sick of all the comments and comparisons! I take them with a grain of salt, but sometimes its hard.

[Misschief]

I get the opposite.

My bub was 3kg and 49cm when he was born 4 weeks premature. I got sick and tired of being told that he was soooooo tiny, just because he was premature. Fact is, when I was in hospital for 10 days after his birth, I have met many babies that were full term and tinier than my premmie bub.

3Kg and 49cm is NOT tiny:mad: Especially not for a premmie. The midwives guessed he would've been at last 4.5kg if I had gone full term.

Now 14 weeks later he's more than doubled his birthweight (6.6kg) and has gained 14cm in length. Now people keep telling me how much he looks like a "normal" baby. THAT pee's me off even more. Since when did my bub turn into "abnormal"??? Just because he was 4 weeks premature??? You've got to be kidding me!

[iMischa]

thats awful misschief that really gives me the poops, thats a hreat weight for being premmie, my bubby was born on time he was 3.5 kg and 48cm long! only a little heavier than urs!!

he got big really quickly, which apparently 'isnt normal' pfft.. i wonder what would happen if we walked around commenting on adults like this? it would never be allowed!! but for babies its apparently ok? meh its worse imo!

[reAllytee]

I had a big babe too ...

DS1 was 4.5kg & 57cms long so everyone was coming in to see the big baby & were always commenting on his size.

They meant no harm though so I just started to laugh in the end but at first it did upset me especially when at one mothers group & it felt like he was this running joke on how quickly he grew because he still even now at 5yrs is in at least a size larger & a head taller than his peers.

With DS2 he was born round the 'normal' range but due to other issues always lost weight etc & that was also commented on ... I found that more heartbreaking tbh.

[Bambibambino]

I know what your saying OP, unfortunately though not everyone is as kind and sensitive as you are. I have a big boy too and in the beginning it would annoy me how much people harped on about his size. Unfortunately you just have to accept that some people are a bit insensitive and move on though as it doesn't go away :rolleyes:

[Misschief]

I think people really should start to think before they speak. Even when they mean well, it can just come out the wrong way and before you know it you have an argument on your hands. Than again, some people dont even know what the word "tactful" means :rolleyes:

[Sugarplum2809]

Thank You ladies, I thought I was the only one that felt that way!

I do feel blessed to have a full term baby considering I was a premmie too (my twin and I). If you look at both of us now, you wouldn't know we where premmies. We had no hair, eyelashes, eyebrows or nails when we where born.

[toyswillkillyou]

I get a lot of comments about Lottie being 'huge' or 'chubby'. Well, she is. I have to wipe under her chins (yup, she has a triple chin) everyday because she eats so fast, she slops milk everywhere!:laughing: She was 3.98kg at birth and is now 8.5kg at 4 months old. She has humongous cheeks and I wouldn't have it any other way. She is such an easy baby and is obviously content.

A lot of people say she has a lovely smile but I don't get told she's cute much either. She tends to frown at people like she's thinking they're peasants or something.:D

You know what? Every kid is different and I don't fit into the acceptable 'mould' in society either, so I try not to care. I understand though, because every now and then everyone has a 'down' day where things really tick you off.

[iMischa]

I get a lot of comments about Lottie being 'huge' or 'chubby'. Well, she is. I have to wipe under her chins (yup, she has a triple chin) everyday because she eats so fast, she slops milk everywhere!:laughing: She was 3.98kg at birth and is now 8.5kg at 4 months old. She has humongous cheeks and I wouldn't have it any other way. She is such an easy baby and is obviously content.

A lot of people say she has a lovely smile but I don't get told she's cute much either. She tends to frown at people like she's thinking they're peasants or something.:D

You know what? Every kid is different and I don't fit into the acceptable 'mould' in society either, so I try not to care. I understand though, because every now and then everyone has a 'down' day where things really tick you off.


well i dont think having 3 widdle chins is cute, i think its absolutely ADORABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the frowning lol so cute, my bub does the same, i think he just knows people are being jerks at him...i look at my bubba and i just wanna squeeze him!!!! im always pinching his cheeks and nibbling his chubby knees (which he cracks up at)

[Liddy]

Aww don't let peoples insenstive comments get you down, my DD2 was born 3.9kgs (8p11o) so abit bigger than average but now she is 7 months old and 10.1kgs! Yep you read correctly! She's so heavy but she is BEAUTIFUL! She has the cutest chubby cheeks and beautiful big blue eyes and a head of blonde hair. DD1 was quite chubby too but not as chubby. I prefer them like that haha, I quite often have people pull me up in the shop and say how gorgeously chubby she is and how lucky I am! Fortunately nobody has said anything nasty to me about her size! Be proud, some people seem to think that because some babies are big it means the mother is over-feeding or something stupid, it's a joke! Infact DD2 eats less then DD1 ever did.

[Sugarplum2809]

I have to admit that my DD is a cutie, I am so happy that she is putting on weight. Her thighs have chubbed up, just want to take a chunk out of them! I can't stop kissing her, esp her cute chin.

She is such as social butterfly like her father, cooing and giggling from 6 weeks. Smiling from her first week.

[iMischa]

thats so cute mia :):)