Experiences from mums feeding nb and have a toddler how did you cope/manage your time

[Mum2Mimi]

ive recentley found out im pregnant with #2 and have had thoughts about differnt things and one is...

i remember with dd the first 8weeks i felt like all i was doing was sitting on the couch breastfeeding! the first 8weeks as a new mum establishing breastfeeding was tough and took up alot of time especially in the first 2weeks and i had a great little suckler who latched on well right from day dot and no problems with supply ect

i would love to breastfeed this lil bubbalub and give it the same oppotunitys mia had, but am wondering if i can manage breastfeeding in thoose first few weeks without packing it in as i will have dd who will be 2yrs when bub arrives and i wont have the time to just sit and feed like i did with dd1, i remember how demanding and stressful thoose first few weeks were with her so am not sure if it would just be easier to put bubs on bottle but then i know if i did that i would forever feel guilty and i really do want to feed again and hopefully last longer then 5months this time to but suppose it all just depends on how i go when bub arrives

so is it hard to establish breastfeeding with your newborn when you have a toddler too?


so did anybody experience these thoughts?

any tips/advice?

am i just worrying? will i manage? did you? share your expereinces?

also some thinsg i could buy for dd to keep her occupied whilst im breastfeeding or things you did would be helpful :)

[Mum2Mimi]

bump :flowerz:

[MimiGrace]

not speaking from personal experience, but the two things that i know my friends found with bub nr 2 and beyond

you already KNOW how to breastfeed. with the first baby, chances are it took a long time because you were still learning (and so was the baby), so this time YOU will know what to do :thumbsup:

but yep, during the first 6 weeks, bubs often need to be on for a long time, so i'd look into getting a sling, and see if you can find a way to breastfeed hands free, so that mia can still get your attention too.
And involve her with the whole process. maybe have some snacks for her, so it becomes a 'some food for you, and some food/boob for the baby'
otherwise, always have a dvd in the player JIC.

if you do go the sling route, maybe make a little sling for mia to carry her dolls in?

Thats all i can think of right now :wave:

[Mum2Mimi]

the sling for mia is a cute idea :p

[katieinwa]

i will find out very soon! (dd will be almost 21 months by the time this one makes an appearance)

but yes, ABC2 will be very helpful , have the crayons and paper out on the floor, make sure she has a drink and snack. worse case have all this stuff up in my room with the tv on while i am on the bed feeding (so it will be one big playpen for her )

its also very helpful that we have been there done that so we should be old hands at bf a newborn second time around!

[peanutbutter&jelly]

I didn't find it hard (B went away for a week when Bella was 3 weeks old :dizzy:)... As long as the rest of the house is child proofed (which I'm sure yours is!!) you should be fine. I made sure I had books near me, as Phoenix loves them, and room next to me for him to sit.
DVD's if Bella needed to be fed at a bad time (for Phoenix I mean) were priceless and yeah, a sling, but I think I would have preferred a ring sling to a set sling like a peanut shell. I can't feed in the peanut shell, but can in the ergo with the infant insert.
Organising things like snacks (pop some crackers or something into plastic containers for Mia while you feed) and making sure there's some for you too was something I really needed, drinks as well.
Pre-preparing meals was good too, it meant that I could BF while holding bub with one arm and chucking in some home made chicken nuggets to heat through in the oven, or popping in a pre-frozen lasagna. Meant i had tonnes of time for both bubs and I could make dinner and pop in in the fridge or freezer at whatever time I had when the bubs were being settled :goodvibes:

[AM]

Mimi you are so clued up for someone who has yet to have children! :D

Yes, a sling, and I always cuddled my toddler, or had a book to read him, or a dvd, or sometimes had a special toy which he hadn't seen before...

But the sling was the lifesaver really... having quick snacks around for the toddler to eat... pretty much it has all been said! It's a real juggling act to begin with, but soon you get into a bit of a loose routine and things get a lot easier.

All the best :)

[kath87]

I couldnt feed dd1 so I was very motivated to try the 2nd time around, my dd1 was 2.5 when dd2 came home, it sure was tricky and very time consuming but I guess I had the added pressure of it all being new where you will have a good idea of what your doing. I had a lot of problems with suply and so was feeding between 2-3 hourly which I kept up for 6 weeks but after that I made the choice to go to formula as it was taking all of my time and I was very mindfull not to leave dd1 out. I'm very glad I gave it a go. If I was you I would give it a go and see how it work if it does great if not you can alway move to formula.

[Mum2Mimi]

ok so sling sounds like the way to go...i wouldnat have a clue about names,designs,where to even purchase as i only brought abjorn carrier with dd so what would you all recomend and are they pricey or around same as bjorn? what weight do they go up to?

[AM]

I cannot fault the ring sling for ease, comfort, multi positioning, breastfeeding is awesomely easy once you get the knack, and I got mine for 40 bucks - a hatchling sling...

And I use it for toddlers as well, and my 5 year old used to like it occasionally when he was being a silly bum!! :)

[MimiGrace]

ok so sling sounds like the way to go...i wouldnat have a clue about names,designs,where to even purchase as i only brought abjorn carrier with dd so what would you all recomend and are they pricey or around same as bjorn? what weight do they go up to?
the general consensus seems to be that the 'ergo' is the best (i have one, and yeah...well worth spending $170 on. even without having my own kids :p), but while bub is a newborn, you'll need an infant insert (theres one for $30, which is basically just a blanket folded up behind bub, so most people i know make their own - or there's a new own called the heart2heart, which looks AWESOME, but costs around 50 :() - it all has a really good re-sale value though.

otherwise, ring slings are awesome too :yes: because you can adjust them to your size (or to dads size if he's carrying), and the fabric spreads out across your back so its not putting heaps of pressure on just one muscle

but i'm sure someone else can give you a good brand, cause i haven't gotten around to buying one yet :( (they range from like $30-$120)

[Mrs Nietzsche]

Sorry I haven't read the thread, but I had stations set up around the house of failsafe toddler distractions (instruments, favourite toy, etc). I am tandem feeding though so if all else failed, I fed both.

[kittentas]

I am sure you will go fine feeding your new baby and managing your toddler. L was born when C was 23 months, and yes is difficult at times but u get through and is worth it. We were toilet training at the time for C but gave that away after a few weeks :) and have just picked that up again now.
I suppose what im saying is you will be able to do it and as others have said i found second time around you really do find breastfeeding more straight forward as it is something you have done before.
Give your daughter her own dolly and she will probaly feed dolly along with you :)

[Mum2Mimi]

thanks ladies will deff look into this sling stuff :yes:

kittentas for the reasurance im sure it will all work out fine and things will just seem to fit!

[kiwichuck]

not speaking from personal experience, but the two things that i know my friends found with bub nr 2 and beyond

you already KNOW how to breastfeed. with the first baby, chances are it took a long time because you were still learning (and so was the baby), so this time YOU will know what to do :thumbsup:

but yep, during the first 6 weeks, bubs often need to be on for a long time, so i'd look into getting a sling, and see if you can find a way to breastfeed hands free, so that mia can still get your attention too.
And involve her with the whole process. maybe have some snacks for her, so it becomes a 'some food for you, and some food/boob for the baby'
otherwise, always have a dvd in the player JIC.

if you do go the sling route, maybe make a little sling for mia to carry her dolls in?

Thats all i can think of right now :wave:


This is great advice!!

Also, I found having a box of 'special' or much loved toys very close by helped - only opening the box at baby feeding times. Also, regularly rotating the toys & activities that were kept in the box kept it exciting and engaging.

[cindye]

Hi miamarshmella:wave:

I have a 22 month old and a little one who will be 3 months old in a week.

I was very lucky that my DH had 6 weeks off work when DD2 was born. Without that I don't know how I could've coped as both our families live interstate, and our littlest one has had terrible reflux with screaming for hours on end every day. We're finally getting her reflux sorted with medication and chiropractic treatment, etc, but we had a really tough time for the first two months. Sorry, I digress...

The thing is, breastfeeding is SO much easier the 2nd time around. And already DD2 only feeds about 3 times during the day when DH is at work, which takes 15-20mins each feed. It's not a lot of time that I need to keep DD1 distracted and busy. Snacks, books and special toys come in very handy. As does ABC2:D.

Personally, I'd rather avoid the extra work involved in preparing bottle for formula, sterilising etc. Bottle feeding still requires you to sit down for a length of time with your new bub, and then extra time sterilising and preparing bottles.

Instead of spending money on formula, put it towards getting a cleaner for a couple of months so you don't need to worry about cleaning, try and get some meals in the freezer so you don't have to cook, or get takeaway, and try and spend some one on one time with your DD when your baby is asleep.

It's going to be a busy, tiring couple of months when your little one arrives, regardless of whether you bottle or breastfeed. And you'll find your routines, and get yourself organised and find what works best for you and you'll be fine!

[Gabi]

When your little one arrives it's important to remember that the first few weeks don't last forever. You can be a little relaxed about your normal rules for a few weeks and your toddler will get used to the baby and the baby will get more efficient.

What works for me is
to allow some television while I nurse
to nurse on the floor where I can interact with my toddler at the same time
to offer finger food to my toddler while I nurse the baby
to nurse lying down on the bed and cuddle my toddler and read stories at the same time (this way we all get a rest)
to have a special one on one activity with my toddler at another time. The baby is not included in his activity ;)

To be honest, the activity my toddler prefers above all others while I nurse it to stand next to my chair and cuddle and kiss the baby the whole time.:bee:

[misskittyfantastico]

This is great advice!!

Also, I found having a box of 'special' or much loved toys very close by helped - only opening the box at baby feeding times. Also, regularly rotating the toys & activities that were kept in the box kept it exciting and engaging.

We had that too - DD's "special booby box":p Just little bits and pieces that only came out when I was feeding.

A lot of the time, as PP have mentioned, DD was just happy to cuddle into DS and I while we fed.

I had a ringsling and a Moby Wrap - both of which you could make or have made really cheaply. It does seem so daunting but you'll make it work.:)