need to vent

[LoveULilly]

im so angry right now i have a 4 month old baby for over a year my best friend has been tryin to get pregnant for most of her relationship she has been depressed cos her boyfriend treated her like **** she found out she would have issues gettin pregnant and was continuing to try while this guy was being emotionaly abusive callin her names and spittin in her face anyway just before i had my baby her relationship became open and she started sleeping around ( while tryin for a baby still and having unprotected sex with another guy not tellin her actual bf and takin fertility pills this ended bout 5 weeks ago cos her boyfriend started being nice to her and they were still tryin to get preg like a week ago they found out she was bout 5 weeks preg and im so disappointed in her i feel as though she is being selfish her a bf treated her like dirt until the thrill of the chase was back and i know it will be a matter of time before it happens again and this time they will be hurtin a little baby swell not to mention she doesn't know who the father is i don't think she really knows what having a baby means or how stressful it is she refuses to ever take responsibility and i think this isn't going to be any different im happy that she's gonna be a mum but i don't think she will cope. her bf is only 19 and im almost 100% he will leave the hardest part is she has told me she is with him cos he's the only person who's paid attention to her not me and he's the only one who will want her which makes me feel responsible

[Blue&Pink]

You're NOT responsible honey.

You didn't drag her into the bed, shove them together, open her legs and slide him in.

SHE is responsible. SHE chooses her own actions.

NOT YOU.

:hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:

I'm sorry she's making you feel like rubbish.

[BabelFish]

Wow! Reckon you could have put a full stop in there somewhere? I had to read that three times just to understand it!! :laughing:

I think you might be pleasantly surprised by your friend.

People do stupid things when they are being treated badly, but you said she had been trying to get pregnant for a year, and is now taking fertility drugs. This means to me that she actually WANTS a baby. She tried very, VERY hard to fall pregnant, clearly.

This also means to me that she will probably be a loving mother.

It's hard for EVERYONE to have a baby. Not just young people or people in difficult situations. I am in a loving relationship, I am 35 years old, I have a tonne of support - guess what? Parenting is still hard work! And I had no idea what to expect either - nobody does, no matter where you come from or your situation in life.

The only thing that will tell is time. She might be a fabulous mother and really settle down and come into her own. If her boyfriend is changing his tune, perhaps he will accept this baby and treat it as his own.

You never know. But all you can do is be her friend and be there for her. If you can't do that then that's ok, but if you can, you should.