completely gone off my partner

[Melbs77]

Hi all,

I'm 7 weeks preg and really worried about my state of mind in regards to my partner. We've only been together 5 months and everything was going well and we were over the moon at news of the preg. Now all of a sudden I feel like I may not love him anymore and I can't stand him to touch me or kiss me or want any kind of affection from me. I'm being really horrible to him and picking on him all the time. Everything he does seems to be amplified like if I ask him something and he doesn't give me the right answer I start screaming at him about how unsupportive he is and that he's the worst person to talk to. I'm worried that maybe I never really loved him and that I was just in a 5 month long honeymoon period. He's also not circumcised and I'm finding that hard to deal with as well. He often smells down there and I've had bacterial vaginosis 3 times, thrush and Group B Strep since we've been together. I know docs stress these aren't sexually transmitted infections but I believe the bacteria that live under the foreskin cause infections in women. I feel terrible for feeling these things but I'm really worried that I don't really love this man and I'm making a huge mistake and will end up a single mother. Are these normal preg hormones making me a bit crazy or could I really be feeling this way? :confused:

[Idonttrustjelly]

:wave: Hey there,

Sorry you feel this way. Being pregnant can sometimes have a big hormonal affect on us. I'd say that since you guys haven't been together all that long, give it a shot. It may just be hormones... and if it isn't, you'll def find out with a bit more time to get to know each other.

Re; the circumcision... each to their own, but my DH is not circumsized and has never given me anything. but I have given him MY thrush from time to time! :p lol!

Hang in there... you'll be so happy to meet your baby :cloud9: , and it's nice to have someone that loves the baby just as equally as you to enjoy it with :)

xx J

[HunterzMummy]

They say to never make major decision in your life while you are pregnant lol.

Was it a sudden click or have you been thinking it for a while? Cause i know i have days when DH drives me insane, i want to kill him. I yell scream, am in the most awful mood.. Its disgusting, but luckily he understands that its not me talking lol.

Pregnancy messes with emotions big times, we cry at the drop of a hat, we laugh at inappropriate times, we yell and scream when we normally wouldnt etc.

Give it time... Be open about it with him - and keep you comunication lines up. And make sure you make time for each other, even if you dont feel like it - go on a date.

Hope things start looking up sooon :hugs:

[Lily of the Nile]

I'm not sure if it's hormones or not, I was definately cranky and didn't want to be touched or stand smells 1st trimester especially with m/s.
I think also being pregnant and with someone for 5 months is a pretty big step, you're still getting to know each other and your building something up which doesn't happen overnight, I'm sure your going to have alot of fear and thoughts run through your mind. You're about to become a family and responsible and connected for the rest of your lives, I had those fears about my husband 2 months before I married him (we were already together for 7 years) so I do understand.
I would suggest maybe doing some couples counselling, I know it's not for everyone, but I think it really helps your relationship and put things into perspective. With a baby coming which will take alot of your time, building your relationship will be hard, maybe a little fast tracked help to get out what your feeling and how to deal with things when they come up.
Good Luck

[Melbs77]

Hey everyone thanks for your replies. The truth is I want a baby more than anything and so does he. This change in feelings towards him seems to have happened suddenly which is why I'm not sure if it's hormones or if perhaps his little flaws, which I have overlooked, seem to be more amplified now as I subconsciously size him up to be my life partner. It's so hard to know if what I'm feeling is real or just hormones :confused:

[butterflywarrior]

My husband is a beautiful, lovely and wonderful man. He is honestly the sweetest guy I have ever met yet since being pregnant (I am 6 weeks), I could quite cheerfully and happily divorce him. EVERYTHING he does annoys me. I don't want to be touched. When he talks I want to scream. I constantly want to ask him if he has any idea how stupid he is.

I really think its your hormones especially as it came on so suddenly. That is exactly how it was for me. Even though you have only been together 5 months, I think if there were some things that annoyed you previous to becoming pregnant - you would have been aware of them and may have just thought they might go away or change.

I think the key is to talk to your partner and just be completely honest. My husband and I often talk about it and sometimes even have a joke (well, I am allowed to joke about it!!). He says that I was the same with my son however I don't remember.

I hope everything works out for you! :hugs:

[GraceUnhearing]

men are annoying at the best of time
just seems more when pregnant

as for the un circed thing
my partner isnt circed and never had a problem
my ex was circed and i always got utis

[Melbs77]

My husband is a beautiful, lovely and wonderful man. He is honestly the sweetest guy I have ever met yet since being pregnant (I am 6 weeks), I could quite cheerfully and happily divorce him. EVERYTHING he does annoys me. I don't want to be touched. When he talks I want to scream. I constantly want to ask him if he has any idea how stupid he is.

:laughing: that absolutely cracked me up! So you're 6 weeks?? Can I ask, did these feelings suddenly appear for you around the 6 week mark? I think I'm approaching 8 weeks now and I'm having the odd 2 second glimpse of realising he's not that bad but then the moment he wants a hug or some kind of affection from me, I could scratch his eyes out.

I don't mean to harp on about the non-circ thing (I've had discussions about it it the circumcision thread). Maybe we need to just get him checked out and cleared of any infections.

[butterflywarrior]

Hi,

How are you going with DP?

As I am IVF, I knew the second the embryo went in so I was hyper aware for PG symptoms. I really noticed the nastiness start at probably 2 weeks? It was my first sign that it might have worked.

I am 7 weeks on Tuesday and its getting better however like you I DO NOT want to be touched and am still pretty much every day struggling with being civil. I have always tried to treat DH how I want to be treated and it is HARD when I want to treat him SO badly because I am sure it would make me feel MUCH better. :D

I have extremely one sided views on C so I cant really give an unbiased opinion however I will say this - my DH is not C and I have never had thrush. I have never smelt anything off down there on him either. DH has a cleaning regime that he does every day in the shower - it takes him 2 seconds. FS back, quick wash, rinse, FS forward. Maybe get him to try this? Or if he already does it, spend a bit more time? It might make you a bit happier. :D

[Pulp Fiction]

Ha ha. I am 8 weeks along and (through no fault of his own) my partner has been driving me crazy for the past week or so. Seriously, even him putting his glass down on the table or walking past me when I'm sitting at the computer is enough to put me on edge. And to make it worse I am sitting here typing and he keeps saying 'Whats wrong? Have I done something to upset you?' etc etc, and its making me even madder. I vary between snapping at him all the time and ignoring him completely. And for some reason, last pregnancy, I would feel really nauseous and go throw up everytime we finished having sex. That hasn't happened so far this pregnancy knock on wood. Anyway (in my case at least) its just hormones. I'm sure when they pass I will feel very bad for how I've been treating my partner. But for now he is annoying me too much. :p

[Pulp Fiction]

Oh, btw I saw your comments in the circumcision thread. Bacterial vaginosis is caused by just that. Bacteria. If he isn't cleaning under his foreskin properly it stands to reason that there would be a bacteria build-up under there and that probably IS whats causing your BV. I'm no doctor, but that makes sense to me. No biggie- Just make sure he cleans under his foreskin properly. :thumbsup:

[notquitesupermum]

In the first trimester my husband drove me nutters, I couldnt stand him and I was moping around cursing myself for falling pregnant to a man I didnt love and didnt want to spend the rest of my life with
Not to mention sex repulsed me (still does unfortunately, maybe a pink baby???)
Infact since we got married I have felt like this (fell pregnant 1 month later)

I put it down to the realisation that I had just made a couple of the biggest decisions in my life and it was abit scary to face that im growing up. Im no longer free wheeling fly by the seat of my pants AWESOME, I now have a resposibility to 2 other human beings!! :eek:

Now im 18 weeks and have had a complete hormonal swing! for the last 4 - 6 weeks I have been SOOO clingy, I just want him around and his love all the time! I just love love LOVE him (just like i did before we were married)....its wierd....

My suggestion is just hang in there and see how you feel, as your body adjusts to the hormones and your head adjusts to the prospect of having a child with this man you might find its perfect or you might be SURE its not. but give yourself time to adjust first.

[M2bee]

I'm so sorry to hear that you are feeling this way...but I completely understand how you feel.

I've just had a beautiful little boy to my lovely partner but in my first trimester, right around the 6-8 week mark, I decided I had made the biggest mistake of my life having a baby with him. I questioned if I was attracted to him, in fact I just questioned everything about him. I was horrible to him and I couldn't seem to stop myself. I hung in there and saw a psych about how I was feeling...I am so unbelievably grateful that I didn't leave him because I love him more than ever now :valentine:.

Its so hard to understand how much your hormones can affect you but I know in my situation it was a combination of pregnancy hormones and being overwhelmed by this huge life decision. I would recommend waiting until well into the second trimester to see how you feel, or if you can, seeing someone to discuss how you are feeling. It really helped me!!

Good luck!!