View Full Version : Panicing that they won't give me an elective??
I'm really stressed...I've had two vaginal deliveries, but my last birth was just horrible and my bub got stuck due to being posterior, I went into shock from blood loss, and I ended up with cervical erosion which caused me to literally cry during sex for 2 YEARS it was that painful! I was told it was listed as a traumatic birth. As such I am very adamant that I want an elective c-section next birth. My partner and I are planning on having another bub this year and are currently ttc, but before even starting to try I made sure I went into the gp for a pre-pregnancy chat to make sure that I coudld get an elective as I honestly don't think I could even have another bub if I was forced to go through another vaginal birth. They told me however that they couldnt' give me a yes or no answer until I was actually pregnant as I would have to discuss it at the hospital I would be delivering at. So we are now ttc and I am so so scared they they won't let me have an elective...what do they consider to be enough 'medical evidence' to warrant one? And at what stage during the pregnancy will I be able to find out if I can have one (as I will be stressed the whole time up until I find out). Who approves the elective c-sections - the gp or the hospital...and can I just change gp/hospital if they so no and find one that lets me?? I will do everything I can to get my elective as I am just terrified at the thought of having to go through a vaginal birth again. Please tell me they will let me have one :(
Look, I have no great advice, and I know it is different for each hospital.
I was in your situation. Only I was pregnant with bub 4.
I was stressed out, panicking, didn't want my baby. All because of the horrible natural births I had experienced.
Technically my births were not deemed traumatic. Well not medically any how.
But for me, they were the worst experiences of my whole life. I found because I had a FEAR of labour and birth, due to my first one.
I actually made my subsequent births worse. Mentally, I just panic. SO instead of listening to my body, I fight it.
I was experiencing nightmare, day mares (even). I could not think of my baby, or my pregnancy in a positive light. I was just Consumed by terror, of what was to come.
AND I couldn't get any one to give me a yes or NO about having a c -section.
I came in here lots, for advice, and What am I going to do stuff.
Go search my username. YOU will see how messed up I was when I first came in here.
Eventually, I broke down with my doctor one, day, and just cried for 30 minutes in his office. I couldn't take it any more.
He sent me to talk to a counsellor, and I also chatted to the midwives.
My doctor decided for me, that my mental health was More important then my physical ability.
So he booked my c -section. Which scared me too. I have never had major surgery in my life.
But My c -section was the best thing I could have done. I bonded easily with my baby. I wasn't exhausted or sore, really. (the drugs they give you for pain, work really good).
Don't get me wrong, My c -section still caused me discomfort. I rellied on the nurses to help me feed bub. And stuff.
But mentally, I came through it with my head in the right place. And I didn't suffer pnd, unlike my other bubs where I believe I had it, but never got treatment for it.
Sorry for the :ecomcity::ecomcity:
I just wanted to give you back ground.
GO talk to your doctor. It is up to your doctor to decide what is best for you.
Mental health Matters. Good luck.:hugs:
One option would be to take out private health insurance, that way if they refuse, you can go private and get one. I know nothing about it, but in other threads, Latrobe is suggested as an insurer with the shortest waiting period for obstetrics.
I understand that you emotionally need the answer before TTC and think that you should pressure your doctor further about it. Though, it may be impossible to get a difinitive, you could perhaps get a letter from a counsellor or psychiatrist stating how detrimental they believe a vaginal birth would be to your mental health, and that might give you a little piece of mind that you have some evidence to support a c/s that you need.
So sorry you're going through this :hugs:
I've been scared of childbirth for as long as I can remember. I don't know why.
With both my previous pregnancies (my first one ended in miscarriage), I pretty much fretted from the time they were confirmed. Lots of tears, sleepless nights, feelings of dread and hopelessness.
I had a private ob and he was happy to go with whatever I chose. He gave me the pros and cons related to the different kinds of delivery and said it was my choice.
I chose a c/s. I may have been able to have my son vaginally, but I really don't think I would have got through it mentally intact.
I hope you get the kind of birth you want. Stick to your guns. Get written support from other health professionals (your counsellor, your gp etc.). And don't give in if the first ob you hit says no - keep looking. Your body, your choice.
I would go see a psychologist to seek help for how youre feeling because having another baby isnt going to fix this, it will only compound things. Then, once youve developed a history with the psychologist they will be able to do your doctors up a report letting your GP and doctors/midwives at the hospital know what your circumstances are.
It will just help in my opinion to have it coming from you AND your psychologist.:shakehands: Come visit us on the Trauma threads if you havn't already.. we're always willing to empathise and listen!:wave:
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