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If the FOB had sexually assaulted you and their own daughter (one of a few children that they have) some years ago. The FBO had over 21 weeks of generic counseling and had not seen the children for 4 years would you have a problem if they
1. Had school photos of their children?
2. had school reports sent to them?
3. was informed if any was any serious or life threatening problem for the child?
4. If the FBO was to sent letter, cards and gifts to the children?
sockstealingpoltergeist
20-02-2010, 09:19
Yes I would have a problem with it. If someone sexualy assaulted my child I would never want them to know where we lived or what school they went to.
Carebare10
20-02-2010, 09:36
If the FOB had sexually assaulted you and their own daughter (one of a few children that they have) some years ago. The FBO had over 21 weeks of generic counseling and had not seen the children for 4 years would you have a problem if they
1. Had school photos of their children?
2. had school reports sent to them?
3. was informed if any was any serious or life threatening problem for the child?
4. If the FBO was to sent letter, cards and gifts to the children?
Do you have a problem with it?
I'm asking about others opinion and their reasons
Yes, I would see it as being inappropriate as they obviously did not see themselves as a parent. Only parents have the right to that kind of information about a child. I would consider him to have given up his parental role when he betrayed the child's trust.
I suppose the issue is how does it affect the mother or the child if the FOB
1. Had school photos of their children?
2. had school reports sent to them?
Fuchsia!
20-02-2010, 10:40
Yes I would have a problem with it. If someone sexualy assaulted my child I would never want them to know where we lived or what school they went to.
I agree, I would do everything in my power to completely wipe him from my childs life.
MagicalLeopluradon
20-02-2010, 10:40
I would have a big problem with it, if anyone close to my children assaulted them I couldn't want them anywhere near them EVER again or have any contact whether it be by email/phone/mail etc IMO they loose all rights.
codswallop
20-02-2010, 14:49
he would have nothing!
if that happned to me or my child they would cease to exist
little bean
20-02-2010, 19:53
I think there would be a huge concern for the children's safety if he were in contact with them. :no: Not a good idea.
Legally the father would have rights to have reports and school photos unless of course a court had decided otherwise.
crazymuma
20-02-2010, 19:59
I suppose the issue is how does it affect the mother or the child if the FOB
1. Had school photos of their children?
2. had school reports sent to them?
Really simple - it affects them both as its opening them both up to assault again. IF a child especially is sexually abused then there address and school info should never be handed to the abuser.
Sorry but I don't believe any man that is capable of messing with a child can be 'cured' after a little counselling.
In no way would this be in the best interest of the child.
Phyllis Stein
20-02-2010, 20:17
I suppose the issue is how does it affect the mother or the child if the FOB
1. Had school photos of their children?
2. had school reports sent to them?
If I was the child victim, I'd feel completely violated and unprotected, even further victimised, if the person who had assaulted me had access to *any* personal information about me. If I was the mother, I'd feel despair at my inability to protect my child from the above, and anger at whatever was forcing my child and I into any contact with our abuser.
ETA. biology does nothing to mitigate the harm of sexual assault. Imagine an adult woman having to send photo and life updates to her rapist!
JabberJaw
20-02-2010, 22:08
:yes: i would have a problem with it.
If it happened to me, this would be why....
Because the piece of **** hurt me and my babies so why would i want him to know about my baby who's life he damaged and ruined.
Pretty simple and obvious one would think. I would be disgusted that he would even ask for such things, i would possibly attend court again to make sure the person did not come near me or my children again.
Why would you think differently OP? Do you think the person should have access to those things?
JabberJaw
20-02-2010, 22:11
21 weeks of generic counseling
:laughing: what a joke, no wonder people take the law into their own hands. 21 weeks and cured? Highly doubt it.
No way to any of the things you asked, no way in this life time.
MummaBear03
20-02-2010, 22:28
:laughing: what a joke, no wonder people take the law into their own hands. 21 weeks and cured? Highly doubt it.
No way to any of the things you asked, no way in this life time.
Yep it's sucky isn't it. Slap on the wrist, if anything, for them.
I wouldn't be giving any information. If the court ordered any information to be given then I would put it to a child psychiatrist and submit that to the courts.
crazymuma
20-02-2010, 22:33
I can tell you if that was my child then the man wouldn't have a chance - I would have ****ing killed him!!!
peanutbutter&jelly
20-02-2010, 22:55
I can tell you if that was my child then the man wouldn't have a chance - I would have ****ing killed him!!!
I'm with you on this one :(
lochiebearsmum
20-02-2010, 22:58
Id hope that is sorry a$$ would be in jail for a long long time!
Its interesting to hear "i'd *%#*ing killl him" I think most would hope that actually do but in actual fact when this sort of thing happens your first and foremost response is to protect rather than defend.
This is an actual case that my sister is going through and there has been three lawyers his hers and the children's. The children's has been the most compelling saying that the fatherless children are more likely to fantasy about their absent father than a child who has lose their father to death. And that the photos and the reports will not affect the mother or the children.
My sisters argument is that these facts included the increase of mothers by choice and the increase of the divorce rate not particularly by children who have been separated to save them for further abuse.
My sister has spent the last three days in court and has emotionally broken down in the witness box but in two weeks the court will be in deliberations about what rights the father still has and what will benefit the children.
I am devestated for her because as most of you have said and any decent person would say that he has fore gone his rights.]
JabberJaw
21-02-2010, 00:03
Hopefully the law will be on her side.
i would be scared if he had pics of the kids from school, he could easily know what school they go to and that could have devestating effects on their future, he could follow them, stalk them and whatnot.
:fingerscrossed: the law does what it is suppose to do in this case, and protect the innocent.
crazymuma
21-02-2010, 00:07
Seriously what is wrong with this world.
In my eyes its simple - if someone abuses a child - doesn't matter how much rehabilitation they do - they should NEVER be able to contact that child again.
Fathers rights going to far once again :rolleyes:
Phyllis Stein
21-02-2010, 00:12
I'm so sorry, to your sister, her family and yourself, Edweena.
This sort of thing really needs to be publicised, as I don't believe it would receive much public support at all. :no:
he would have nothing!
if that happned to me or my child they would cease to exist
:iagree: I would basically live my life as if this person doesn't exist anymore. No contact whatsoever would be taking place with this person...no photos, report cards, no information at all. He'd be a bad memory and that's all he'd be.
Seriously what is wrong with this world.
In my eyes its simple - if someone abuses a child - doesn't matter how much rehabilitation they do - they should NEVER be able to contact that child again.
Fathers rights going to far once again :rolleyes:
:iagree: Absolutely.
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