View Full Version : Who has a day off work with sick kids?
MummaBear03
11-02-2010, 20:06
It occurred to me that the first person we call (in a 2 parent family) when a child comes down sick at childcare is the mother and I've never really thought to call the father other than if the mother is unavailable.
So who in your family takes time off work with kids? Or do you then call on friends and family to help out while you both continue to work?
Just wondering because I'm sure it can't always be the mother who takes time off work, surely there are fathers who take that time off as well :D
missie_mack
11-02-2010, 20:11
Whoever has the most family leave and will cop the least flack... and at times we have had to ask my mother to utilise her family leave
Mrs Nietzsche
11-02-2010, 20:11
my dh does but only if i am wrecked, but i dont work. He has taken DS to the doctor tonight actually.
This is actually a major reason for women not getting promotions etc
eta what i think is disgusting is that DH got a written warning 3 weeks ago for taking a day off work because DS was sick, they said he has to bring a med cert to prove DS was sick, even though he is only casual anyway (but ongoing, he works 5 days a week) so they dont have to pay him for days off
I had to take Monday off work due to a sick child, have only had about 4 days off (due to sick child) in the last year. I'm lucky he doesn't get sick too often.
I'm lucky enough to have a good job - they even let me bring him in if he's not 100%.
MummaBear03
11-02-2010, 20:15
DD very rarely gets sick too which is lucky, but being a single parent of course there's no other option but for me personally to leave work for her.
I agree this must be why women are often not promoted because like I said, the mother is normally the first one we call without even giving it a second thought.
~BEXTER~
11-02-2010, 20:19
Usually me but there has been times when I just can't have another day off work, or if I have got work through my agency so Ashley Keiaras step dad has taken the day off a few times.
DD very rarely gets sick too which is lucky, but being a single parent of course there's no other option but for me personally to leave work for her.
I agree this must be why women are often not promoted because like I said, the mother is normally the first one we call without even giving it a second thought.
That's true MummaBear, although unfortunately in most cases the dads won't pick them up anyway as you say!
My ex has a relationship with his son but I think I'd be laughed outta town if I ever asked him to take time off work for sick DS!! No matter how much time I'd taken off his job is more important :rolleyes:
ETA: My mum has watched DS while sick and I also wanted to mention I think being single the hardest is actually when you're both (kids and mum) are both sick at the same time aaaaaaaaaargh!
3'llhavetodo
11-02-2010, 20:21
Me, always me
missie_mack
11-02-2010, 20:23
eta what i think is disgusting is that DH got a written warning 3 weeks ago for taking a day off work because DS was sick, they said he has to bring a med cert to prove DS was sick, even though he is only casual anyway (but ongoing, he works 5 days a week) so they dont have to pay him for days off
As a casual he may be entitled to leave and it cannot be required to be medically confirmed unless it was a standard requirement before the incident (I know when I was a casual as a teen I was required to provide medical certificates despite not being paid for it)
Most people in the country since Jan 1 and the workplace changes are entitled to 10 days family leave :cool:
Dh would take it off. I am about to go back to work 1 day a week and have started ds in care. He has sick leave and as a casual, no work no pay. he is more than capable.
Ana Gram
11-02-2010, 20:26
I had this discussion with my ex a while back when looking at my options. His work basically said that it was the mother's responsibility to take take leave for child needs. I was less than impressed to say the least.
singlemumma82
11-02-2010, 20:28
I am usually the one they call if DD gets sick although I am also lucky that her dad, his mum, sister, or best friend will also help me if I am unable to get her or have a day off work. I also have the option to take her with me if she isnt 'too' sick yet not well enough for school IYKWIM.
sam's mum
11-02-2010, 20:34
it depends on what we have on that day.
Even though I am a higher level than DH at the moment, it is often still me. that is mainly because I want to be with them when they are sick.
DD2 dislocated her elbow a couple of weeks ago. even though DH had the day off with her the second day, I still took it off as well. (of course she would have been fine by then if they had managed to put it back in the first day)
I work days,DH works nights so someone is always available to look after the kids.
DH has taken a couple of nights off tho.His work is pretty good like that.DS1 cut his head open just before DH went to work,so he got night off.Then I had to call him home when DS2 had an accident.ANd we had to get test results back so he got the night off too.He just got family leave:yelclap:
~*clairesmum*~
11-02-2010, 20:44
Its always me that takes the time off work... Only cause i choose to cause Dh gets more money then me so we can live with out mine. DS is the one thats get sick the most but its always things like high temps which mean that he cant go back for 24hrs after his last temp. which is always teething lol. bt work is pretty good cause im causal plus i work where my kids go to childcare so they no its for real lol
The Girls Only Club
11-02-2010, 20:51
I take time of when girls are sick.DH drives a truck and sometimes its hard to find him
Me, always...
Childcare centre is 15 mins from my work, DF works all over Sydney, although very rarely in western Sydney where I work.
I also work for government so get good sick pay. My DF is self-employed so no sick pay.
biscotti
11-02-2010, 21:00
My husband most of the time.
If I take a day off I have to organise for someone to come in to relieve me and that can be really really hard to find someone, whereas DH can *usually* just take a day without too much hassle, depending on what he has in his diary for that day and the office girls just re-arrange any appointments etc for him if needs be.
TripleTime
11-02-2010, 21:01
Me, DF only has time off if someone is in hospital or im sick.
His used all his leave in the last month. So if anyone gets sick between now & June, my mum will be using her leave.
Usually my dh looks after him.
My ds is sick, but getting better. We were trying to work out an option for tomorrow if he got worse as he's meant to go to cc tomorrow. My dh & I both have full days tomorrow, so our backup would be my mum.
When my ds had chicken pox and had to stay home for 10 days it was a little crazy. Mum was away & she usually had him 3 days a week. My dh took as much leave as he could, but I needed to cover 2 days which I thought wasn't too bad.
He had surgery at 15 months and we both took the day off.
Well right now They wouldnt have to call me as I am at the school anyway lol but once she is at her school by her self it will be me.
NonnyMouse
11-02-2010, 22:54
DD was sick a lot at one of her daycares and DX and I both had jobs that we couldn't easily take a whole day off so we compromised.
One of us would do the morning shift looking after DD at home, and the other would do the afternoon shift. That way both our bosses could see that we were still willing to come in and do our work as best we can for at least half the day, and we didn't miss out on too much pay or lost sick leave for one person (bosses are sometimes happier to let you take a half day off without docking your pay or taking it off your sick leave entitlement).
If she got sick in the middle of the day our daycare centre would call me, as I worked only 10 mins away and DX worked about 40 mins away) and then if I wasn't able to come get her, I'd call DX and he would. It depends on who was more able to leave their post for the afternoon.
Aaliyahsmummy
11-02-2010, 23:30
As a casual he may be entitled to leave and it cannot be required to be medically confirmed unless it was a standard requirement before the incident (I know when I was a casual as a teen I was required to provide medical certificates despite not being paid for it)
Most people in the country since Jan 1 and the workplace changes are entitled to 10 days family leave :cool:
:iagree: We require our casuals to provide med certificates, we have had dodgy staff in the past who would claim they are sick at like 8.30 (when start time is 9) simply because they decided to go to the beach:rolleyes: They got busted, we now ask for certificates from everyone. I personally think its sad that the dodgy people stuff things up for the people who do the right thing!
When hubby and I have kids, I'm sure it will be me staying home 99% of the time when they are sick, because I work in my families business, so have unlimited paid leave!
Myztiks#1Fan
11-02-2010, 23:34
well there is only me now so i would have to have time off work sick. i am lucky coop very rarely gets sick now as well and hope it stays that way.
It depends on what's currently happening in our jobs. We usually take it in turns.
Being a contractor means that I get no sick pay, holiday pay, personal leave pay etc. Basically if I'm not at work I don't get paid so taking a day or more off work plus the expense of CC makes it very expensive very quickly.
On the other hand, DF is the Operational manager where he works and is the only person qualified to do many of the activities. It can be a case that if he's not at work then production stops which can jeopardise the hours of 20+ other people so that's not real good either.
We just don't have anyone else.
Last Queens Birthday long weekend was a shocker, we had 6 infections between the 3 of us. :(
MummaBear03
11-02-2010, 23:55
It depends on what's currently happening in our jobs. We usually take it in turns.
Being a contractor means that I get no sick pay, holiday pay, personal leave pay etc. Basically if I'm not at work I don't get paid so taking a day or more off work plus the expense of CC makes it very expensive very quickly.
On the other hand, DF is the Operational manager where he works and is the only person qualified to do many of the activities. It can be a case that if he's not at work then production stops which can jeopardise the hours of 20+ other people so that's not real good either.
We just don't have anyone else.
Last Queens Birthday long weekend was a shocker, we had 6 infections between the 3 of us. :(
Oh wow that sounds tough!
DH and I both get carers leave with our jobs. So we can essentially both take the day off if need be, although we wouldn't because then we would have less carers days in our book.
SimplyMum
12-02-2010, 06:09
Me. They call me and I come running. But DS doesn't get sick that often. I think it's been about a year since I've been called.
Raising Leprechauns
12-02-2010, 12:21
Daycare always calls me. But I work less than two minutes away, and I am the one that does the drop off etc - so I am the person they are familiar with. That being said - if its urgent and they dont get me on the phone they will call DH. They have a policy of working down the list of numbers until they speak to a person.
As for time off - we tend to share it - depending on whos been off most and what we have on at work. when its something that means a few days out - then we sometimes call in Grandma.
I agree with the point about it being career limiting.......... I can no longer do overtime or travel for conferences and training and come winter - with two daycare kids there is a lot of sick days.
its always me!!!
which sucks because i cant really leave my job at the drop of a hat if something happens. I work one on one and until I finish what I'm doing, I can't go. but because I'm always out and about with my job, once I finish with one person, I can usually get there quickly..
if we know he is sick, we just go on who has more leave available or who has the biggest day. DP usually wants to stay home cos he would prefer to be home with a sick kid than at work usually :rolleyes:
FearlessLeader
12-02-2010, 12:45
It occurred to me that the first person we call (in a 2 parent family) when a child comes down sick at childcare is the mother and I've never really thought to call the father other than if the mother is unavailable.
:hair: gaaaa, this used to rile me SO MUCH when i worked in child care. all the women i woked with seemed to have this "dads are useless" mentality. And they would have no problem b!tching about a hardworking mum who said "i will be there in 2 hours, I have a really important meeting", but wouldn't even blink an eye when Dads refused point blank to come in and pick up their sick kid!!! Centres (and schools) should ask parents to indicate on their contact details forms who should be contacted as first point of call- i bet in many cases it wouldn't even be mum or dad, but grandma or someone else. Mamabear, maybe you could implement that at your centre??
when ours go to childcare i will be requesting that DP picks up sick kiddies, as he drives and i don't, and he's able to work from home and I'm not. Bet you anything I'll get all the calls, though!
FearlessLeader
12-02-2010, 12:47
its always me!!!
which sucks because i cant really leave my job at the drop of a hat if something happens. I work one on one and until I finish what I'm doing, I can't go. but because I'm always out and about with my job, once I finish with one person, I can usually get there quickly..
if we know he is sick, we just go on who has more leave available or who has the biggest day. DP usually wants to stay home cos he would prefer to be home with a sick kid than at work usually :rolleyes:
:laughing: that will be my DP as well- sit around at home watching Disney DVDs, witrh his laptop on, pretending to "work from home"
:laughing: that will be my DP as well- sit around at home watching Disney DVDs, witrh his laptop on, pretending to "work from home"
mmm yeah he'll claim that he'll "get something done around the house" if he stays home and then i'll come home to find the two of them napping on the couch!
FearlessLeader
12-02-2010, 13:02
mmm yeah he'll claim that he'll "get something done around the house" if he stays home and then i'll come home to find the two of them napping on the couch!
awww, :goodvibes: that's gotta be pretty adorable tho, right?
mum2bubba
12-02-2010, 13:18
I am not working so obviously I stay home with them while Grant works, but if we were both working I guess we'd take it in turns. If I had just gotten a job and had only been working a few weeks and the kids fell sick I'd most likely speak to Grant about taking time off cos he's been at his job a few years.
awww, :goodvibes: that's gotta be pretty adorable tho, right?
yeah it's pretty adorable :bee: i can't understand why everyone thinks men are so imcompetant lol.. they are different sure but they can be such great parents.
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