How can I get rid of FOB from my life?

[ladybugblue84]

FOB & I have a crappy relationship. We haven't lived together for a long time but we are still in an on/off relationship & it's literally driving me mental. I wish I could just let go & get on with my life but I just can't seem to be strong enough to follow through. He doesn't provide for us, he is happy living his bachelor teenager style life without a job or any income of any description (living with his parents) & for some reason I just can't let go.

How have you ladies just burnt that bridge forever? I just feel like I have been stuck in a rut for years. Tell me how to get out?

[Princess Drama]

My ex was a cheater but I put up with it for much longer than I should have because we had been together so long I didnt think I could live without him.

It wasnt until the last affair that i realised this wasnt going to end and I had to grow some backbone.

The first few months were hard I wont lie. For the first month I almost went back about 5 times. Im so glad I didnt.

[ladybugblue84]

How did u actually stop yourself from going back those 5 times? I am terrible when it comes to self control & I often easily forget the pain he has caused me 2 days earlier & call him. I need to harness the pain & the anger of when he initially hurts me & use that to give me the strength to just not call, EVER!

I've deleted all his numbers from my ph. Hopefully that works.

[Maia]

Read "Its called a breakup because its broken" by Ruotola Behrendt and Greg Behrendt I swear its a great book. Even for just a giggle. ;) And it has some great advice in it.

Unfortunately because you have a child together, you will always have some sort of contact.

FOB here has nice times, then...he falls out of his tree... its during the nice times that I wonder what could and should have been. I solved this by doing a pros and cons list. No seriously i did!

I had an A4 page of cons... in contrast i had 4 lines of pros... that was my answer. And whenever I feel like remincing about the good times, i get out the list. Its a pretty stark reminder as to why we arnt together and should never be!