When will she poo in the loo?!

[sebmum]

Hi there everyone

My 3 yr old DD will wee in the toilet no probs, but will absolutely NOT poo in the loo. She goes beserk if you try to get her to do one on the toilet.

I know I shouldn't compare, but all the other kids in my mother's group (all 3 yrs old) are pooing wonderfully (that sounds wrong, doesn't it?!) and I get concerned that she's being left behind.

It's a real pain as she insists on having a nappy put her on when she needs to poo, even though the toilet is right there. We've tried bribes with stuff she loves. We've tried getting her to sit on the loo whilst wearing her nappy. We've tried EVERYTHING!

Anyone else out there with a DD or DS like this? Will she ever poo on the loo????:hair:

[sebmum]

Wow, I really am on my own with this problem......:(

[Myztiks#1Fan]

she will get there. i dont have alot of advice as i havent been through it as my son does both wees and poos in the toilet. maybe just let her go for a bit longer, she obviously isnt ready. the toilet is a big scary thing to all toddlers and some take to it quickly while others dont.

could you maybe continue letting her poo in the nappy for awhile but then get her to flush the poo down the toilet perhaps? make it fun so to say?

[Nemmy]

No you aren't the only one, my DD1 was EXACTLY the same when she was 3. We tried everything, but like your DD would only poo in a nappy. In the end we got some help from her paediatrician and managed to get the situation sorted. It turned out she was constipated and felt much more relaxed pooping in a nappy than on the toilet. She started taking lactulose to help soften her poo and with a lot of encouragement she started to go on the toilet. I also decided to remove the nappies out of the question (as she was still wearing these to bed at night at the time) and bought her special pull-ups with pretty pictures on them, telling her they were her 'special nighttime undies' and we didn't have to use nappies anymore as she was a big girl. It did take many many months to sort the situation under the guidance of her paediatrician but everything is fine now and she's 4.5 years. Hope this helps.

[splish n splash]

My DS was the same he was going wee's in the toilet since 2 but poo's always wanted a nappy on. we didn't push me to much would just say use the toilet but he refussed.

Low and behold about 3 months ago at just over 3 he said he wanted to do poo on the toilet and we haven't looked back at this stage he also decided that he could go all night without a nappy or wee. so nappy free house yay

it will happen just let nature take it's course and don't push them.

[SalTheGal]

I was talking to a GF the other day bout this very thing- you are definitely not alone!!

A couple of suggestions:

Do you still have a potty/or can use a potty, instead of the toilet?

Or atleast a high step she can put her feet flat on whilst on the toilet (not tippy toes)

When we did toilet training one thing that my wonderful MCHN said is that kids need to have their feet firmly grounded on something to be able to do a poo- and even better if the can have their knees raised quite high, such as when they are on a potty.... the reason being that we all need to have our feet grounded to be able to do a poo- in order to 'bear down' and push if that makes sense (have you ever tried to do one with your feet dangling?!?!), we always made sure that we did this with DS when he was learning, and I noticed he would never be able to do a poo on a public toilet/other toilet early on till he got the hang of it- and I think its cause there wasn't anything to place his feet on.

The other thing we do is to make the toilet a relaxing safe place... in fact as dodgy as it sounds (and so typically male :p) we will often send DS into the toilet with a fave book to read whilst he is sitting there, so he can chill and take his time and not get bored.

Just a couple of suggestion, hope it works out for you!

[sebmum]

Ok thanks guys.....will try your ideas.

Am feeling a little deflated though as was at a friend's house yesterday and her daughter (who just turned 2) was starting her first day of TT and did a poo on the toilet first go............NOT FAIR!!!! My DD was standing beside her doing a poo in her nappy. Grrrrrrrrrrrrr.

I'm sure she'll come around to the idea soon.:fingerscrossed:

[AshleeClaire07]

you are not alone!! My daughter was exactly the same about 3-4 months ago (she's 2 months shy of 3 now) - because she's been pooing standing up in her nappy all this time, she refused to poo in the toilet..

I think patience is important - if you push too hard, they will get stressed. Couple of things I did:
- I would show her when I went to the toilet and let her know that mummy sits down to do a poo
- DD has a cousin who is 2 months older and was toilet trained well before DD. When we went over and DD saw her cousin sitting down to do a poo, I would gently point it out to her,making sure I wasn't comparing or putting DD down
- Kids have this expression or face when they're going to do a poo - DD's face goes red when she does a poo. If I notice that early enuff, I would carry her to the potty and pull her nappy out so she can do it on the toilet - this didn't happen very often tho...

HTH... you'll get there, don't worry. :yes:

[2toddlers]

Hi Sebmum

Sorry can't help with issue. I have DD just turned 3 and DS just turned 2 and same problem but getting worse as I've just started TT DS and DD thinks it's now ok to wee on floor!? :hair:

I've searched the web but got no solutions yet - :confused: will keep you posted if i get somewhere (hopefully soon & fast) as I've just joined bubhub


Cheers
2toddlers

[~Candy~]

Having similar problems here with my 3y/o ds.
He now gets a chocolate frog each time he does a poo on the loo and it's working :smiliedance:
I just have to keep reminding him..."no poo's in your undies, do it in the toilet like a big boy and you can have a chocolate frog!".
It may not be the healthiest way, but after months of pooing in undies, I'm over it and am happy to reward with junk!

[sebmum]

I've tried the chocolate thing. She absolutely lives for Tim Tams so we got desperate and told her she could have TWO Tim Tams if she did a poo on the toilet and still she refused!!!!

Changing her nappy is getting really gross now as she's a big girl and it's like changing a grown-up's nappies!

It's just super frustrating, that's all. :no:

[beancounter]

I now have a 10yo, but went through what you are going through - though much worse. My daughter used to get so constipated that we ended up in hospital a few times for enemas - just awful. She used to get so nervous about going that she wouldnt go. In hindsight my advice is dont worry about it. truly. She is 3 years old and doesnt poo on the toilet - she could live till she is 90 so in the scheme of her life it doesnt matter.
I have been where you are and I know how caught up you can get thinking something is wrong if they dont poo on the toilet at 3 - but I would just relax and give her a nappy. She is not going to be wearing one as a teenager, and if it takes till she is 4 or 5 it doesnt matter. It is society that has decided that children should poo on the toilet before they are 3. I think we should let the children decide and not treat it like a big deal.
If she is still in a nappy and about to start school - then maybe worry. But please dont stress about this because it is not a black and white rule and doesnt matter.

[Darrietta]

Hi there - I'm not sure if this is any help but I'm having exactly the same issue with DS1 who is also 3.

(Not sure if this is true, but I thought it was kind of funny!) When I was talking to a friend about it, she mentioned that she'd heard of a study that found that so many kids are afraid to poo in the toilet because they feel like they're losing a part of themselves?

Anyway, I'm living in hope that DS1 will get it sometime in the NEAR future. (On a good note - at least he's not playing with it anymore) Goodluck!

[codswallop]

Hi there - I'm not sure if this is any help but I'm having exactly the same issue with DS1 who is also 3.

(Not sure if this is true, but I thought it was kind of funny!) When I was talking to a friend about it, she mentioned that she'd heard of a study that found that so many kids are afraid to poo in the toilet because they feel like they're losing a part of themselves?

Anyway, I'm living in hope that DS1 will get it sometime in the NEAR future. (On a good note - at least he's not playing with it anymore) Goodluck!
ha ha i get the whole not playing in it!
cracked me up!!

we had the same issue with DD, you would walk in to see he pooing and id say quick quick lets put that poo in the toilet and she would say no thank you its not finished yet
and then one day boom she ran off and pooed in the loo all on her own first thing i knew about it was when she ran out all pleased as punch saying mum mum i pooed on the toilet!
just hang in there!