acknowledging relatives...

[Fil]

:wave: guys,

am in a bit of a quandry about my eldest son, 2 and 2 months.
He has a real capacity to just be horrible (for want of better word) to family members. My mum for example, sometimes we turn up at the house and he'll see her and tut and will not even greet her. He does the same to me and his dad regularly, especially me but with regard to my mum and his uncle, do I insist on what he should do? or do I ignore it? But if i ignore it will he not just think it's ok to enter or leave the house without saying bye or giving a kiss?

Thanks,

Fil

[sunflowermummy]

Personally if my children are rude to their grandparents etc, I pull them up on it. To me its a common courtesy that they should learn to say Hello and goodbye when being spoken to.....If they are spoken to and dont answer, I also tell them they need to talk to them as they are being very rude and if they dont, they get in trouble, eg time out on the lounge...I strongly believe in manners..Now if the grandparents were rude and disrespectful to my children, then I wouldnt make them talk to them...Give respect to get respect...

Be interesting to see what others say....

[3lilcutipies]

I wouldn't ignore it, but at his age I wouldn't stress too much either. He is only just learning what is acceptable social behaviour and you are there to teach him, so I would just say "say hello" and try it a couple of times but not much point pushing him until he gets upset. Maybe playing some games with teddies or puppets where they all greet each other, play, then all say goodbye to each other might help? :)

[JabberJaw]

Meh, he is only 2, so i wouldn't be stressing to much.

I would just repeat something along the lines of 'say hello to Nana' or 'say bye to Nana' every time you greet them and he will get it soon enough.

At 2, they are still learning so give him time to pick up on it, don't rouse on him if he doesn't.

[Hollywood]

I think it's easier to teach them good manners right from the start, than to undo bad manners later on.

Our DS is 2y10m and people comment on how polite he is and how quick he is to say hello. But if he forgets his manners I gently remind him but I don't make a big deal out of it.

[Mummita]

I think it's easier to teach them good manners right from the start, than to undo bad manners later on.

Our DS is 2y10m and people comment on how polite he is and how quick he is to say hello. But if he forgets his manners I gently remind him but I don't make a big deal out of it.

:iagree: I'm a bit of a stickler for manners and politeness. However, obviously a child's age would determine how strict I am about them. I regularly get comments on how well mannered my kids are, but they're still kids, and even the best mannered kids have their bad days. I wouldn't make a huge deal out of it though as your son has only recently turned 2.

Oh and I liked the idea of the teddy / puppet role play 3lilcutipies. Might use that :thumbsup:

[MummaBear03]

I think it's easier to teach them good manners right from the start, than to undo bad manners later on.

Our DS is 2y10m and people comment on how polite he is and how quick he is to say hello. But if he forgets his manners I gently remind him but I don't make a big deal out of it.

I agree with this, however I don't push it if DD doesn't know someone well or at all. She's polite, but I don't push her to give out kisses and cuddles. She was 5 when she met her paternal grandmother for the first time, she said hello to her and had a short conversation, but refused to give her a kiss or a cuddle or sit on her lap and I refuse to push a child into doing those things simply because someone's related.

Just recently we were walking past a really expensive private school and on the way past the 2 men at the crossing were just setting up and said good morning to us both, DD said "Good morning, I hope you 2 have a great day" and they both smiled and wished her a good day as well. She said "I will, I'm going to school now to see my friends and teacher" and on the way back they remembered me. The kids from that school were just getting there and the 2 men were saying hello but with no response from the children or parents. One of them looked at me and said "You have a delightful little girl, and I hope to see you both walking again" :D

But I still refuse to push a chld into being physical like kisses or cuddles or sitting on laps if they barely know a person or don't feel comfortable doing so.

[sweetsugardumplin']

Don't make a fuss, just be a great role model!

Make a big fuss of Mum and Uncle, give them a kiss and a cuddle, he'll observe this and maybe imitate.......but don't make a big deal about it.

He's only two, and two year olds are still in the very early stages of working out how the world works!

(also two year olds are on a bit of a mission working out how they can some power/control over their lives) if you take his power away here, by forcing the issue, it will manifest somewhere else ;)

[Fil]

Yes, all very interesting points made and lots of food for thought too.

Thing is he knows what to do, it is a control thing, absolutely it is, I also agree that it would be much harder to undo bad habits later on.

He is polite and says please and thank-you etc. we all demonstrate hi and goodbye with kisses etc, I just want him to demonstrate respect, his attitude at times just really stinks!

thanks for all your words of wisdom!