jelous auntie

[Loz286]

I have an auntie who is a spinster who is not a saint in any way and have always had issues with she is one of those people who no nothing but to be bitter and jealous anyway had a family function on the week end and she was slagging out the choices people make like having children out of wedlock (me), want to have their children in their wedding(me), and wat do they expect their children to beat them down the isle and how dare they wear a white dress(haven't decided on that one haha) if they have children.. im an emotional person as it is and then to hear that being pregnant and in that exact same situation i was so hurt of cos got upset and im in the wrong for getting upset and walking out so I didnt cause a scene.. what do i do?? help!

[Orris Apjoko]

If she does it again, say "thanks for using me as an example but how dare you when you have done things other people wouldnt imagine doing and if someone were to judge you in public to others how would you feel?

See if she'll do it again.

[Dreambeliever]

next time she does it, say loudly to the person next to you :
"it's so sad how some people have to belittle other peoples situation in order to feel good about their own pathetic lives"
:yes:

[Mummita]

Wow what a nasty so & so. It's bad enough she made those outdated judgemental comments, but to say in front of everyone is really low. Seriously, what age is she living in? Meh, wear white, wear black, go naked. Your day - your way. I know it's easier said than done, but I wouldn't worry about what she says, she's probably jealous.

[JabberJaw]

Don't worry about it, seems she is stuck in the dark ages with her 'old school' thinking.

[Little-Pink-Hen]

I think children part of weddings of their parents are beautiful :yes: it's like a family commitment then. ESP when the kids walk mum down the isle or stand in attendance of dad and/or mum!
I'd say to someones " sad how ppl judge others about life choices they wish the could diliberare over themsleves"

[Loz286]

Thanks for your advice.. Ive been going over it again and again in my head and cant see how all the other aunties and Nana are saying I should just get over it. As far as I can see I did no worng and did the mature thing by leaving.. most people would have caused a scene and had a go bakcv at her..but my mum's been told that "thats the way she is and she can say what she likes you have to learn to let it roll off your shoulders"

[Bubmum]

I really hate that way of thinking...that just because they are "older", they can be rude, etc.
Respect is a two way street. I hope you aren't inviting her to the wedding....seeing as she has such strong opinions about it.
At the end of the day, it doesn't matter what she thinks. She is just another petty person trying to ruin things for other people. Women who live alone, and have sad bitter lives like to try to spread the bitterness..

[BitterSweet]

She sounds like a old prune.

[Theophania]

I have one son and a baby girl on the way, not married yet either and I am so excited to wait till they are a bit older to include them, I can't wait to see my little man in a tux... SO CUTE :cloud9:

Anyways if I were you I would definitely wear the brightest white dress you can find :laughing:

I know its easier said than done, but if I hear people speaking like this I just ignore them, it just shows me how ignorant they really are. I let them live in their little dream land where everyone courts for a year then gets engaged then marries, then has sex :laughing: then buys a house..... How naive some can be lol, don't get me wrong some people do it this way but it is less common these days. I HAD a friend who was about 3 yrs older than me that thought this way and was very judgmental of friends of ours who had a baby first :eek: None of her business..;

Good luck with the bub and eventual wedding :D

[Loz286]

How do I get one of those beautiful signature things???

[Ana Gram]

Don't invite her to your wedding. If she asks why, say that you chose to do things that she found offensive so thought it best she didn't come.

[JasmineLouise]

She sounds like a old prune.

:iagree: maybe her attitude explains her 'spinster' situation. Sounds like she has nothing better to whinge about.

Im with chelle, dont invite her :shame:

[WorkingClassMum]

How do I get one of those beautiful signature things???

Click on User Control Panel on the LHS of the second blue info bar

then click on Signature on the LHS

There is a post on how to get tickers in FAQ

[Loz286]

Oh she def wont be invited! ive totally wipped her off my radar! yes she is a spinster and the reason is def her attitude and wants to bring everyone down to make herself feel better!

[WorkingClassMum]

Oh she def wont be invited! ive totally wipped her off my radar! yes she is a spinster and the reason is def her attitude and wants to bring everyone down to make herself feel better!

I think she needs to know why she's not invited. I agree with Chelle, you wouldn't want to invite her along when such an treasured invitation to such a beautiful celebration would only be offensive to one such as herself...

Maybe you could very politely tell her that as she's made her thoughts known, you really wouldn't want to put her in the position of refusing the invite, so you'll just not invite her...

[Theophania]

Oh she def wont be invited! ive totally wipped her off my radar! yes she is a spinster and the reason is def her attitude and wants to bring everyone down to make herself feel better!

'off topic' Nice signature :p

[Loz286]

Thanks!!! i think its an awesome idea to let her know she's not invited and why!!!

[mumma sienna]

Loz286- wow this is exactly like alot of people in my life, aunties, uncles, friends, etc... all they could do was criticise my choices!! the way i dealt with it was to cut them completely out of my life and let them know why! if they can't be happy and supportive then there is no room for them in my life!

This time of your life should be the most exciting and anyone that wants to rain on your parade because they are jealous, to put it simply tell them to **** off!! if they aren't going to be considerate of your feelings then why should you be considerate of theirs!!

sorry if that was too blunt, but have been through it years ago and i learnt to be very straight forward with people!!

good luck!

[Loz286]

I have cut her out, I also learnt that people like that are not worth being part of your life let alone my baby. I dont want my baby to face the bitterness and torment I had to face with her.

The issue is do I cut out the rest of my family for making excuses for her, protecting her and telling me I just should get over it and thats she way she is and she can do and say as she likes.. Im really hurt by all of them but of cos her mostly.. I don't no how long my nan will be around but she was the key person who stood up for the aunty and didnt give a hoot about my feelings....

[Stretchmark Diva]

The next time someone says about Aunty "that's just the way she is," say "well, this is just the way I am. I'm not going to tolerate such rudeness and nastiness any longer. Get used to it!"

To quote Dr Phil: You teach other people how to treat you.

Congrats on your pregnancy and your engagement!