Vag or c/sect for second time birth?

[susmamma]

Hi there,
Would be greatful for some feedback on decision for second birth.:)
After long/difficult and terribly traumatic first birth (felt like I'd been hit by a car and then raped, not a very good combination) it has taken me some time to heal mentally and be ready to give birth vaginally for the second time. My daughter will be 20 months old when we have our second due mid october this year. I was feeling really confident and happy about giving birth vaginally for this second delivery (had come a long way from thinking I'd never even have sex again!).
I had a bladder prolapse from first delivery which I understood would not be further effected by second vaginal birth and I figured I could just get it all stitched up after I'd finished having babies anyway. So I got over that hurdle, started thinking about getting a doula and once again focused on a vaginal delivery.
It now seems that the third degree tear I sustained from the first birth may get worse if I deliver vaginally again. Currently I'm seeing a colo-rectal surgeon who is going to do anal ultrasound (gross!:eek: ) to see if I've healed properly and therefore if can do a vag birth.
But here's the thing. Now I dont think I want to have a vaginal birth anymore. The idea of pooing myself for the next 50 years because I tore again in my rectum, fills me with dread. No longer do I have visions of a happy nurturing natural birthing experience, now I'm scared witless I'm going to tear from pillar to post again. Even if the anal ultrasound results in a positive for vaginal birth, I'm still worried, even healed that it will all go pear shape again.
So... if I can have a vag delivery should I try again? Should I just request a c-sect anyway? If I request one after the colo-rectal guy says I'm ok to have vag delivery am I required to pay for it under the public system? I'm booked into a public hospital in Sydney - currently at RHW but transfering to RPA in Sept.
Any advice would be genuinely appreciated.
Nervous mum:(
xx

[SilverStarfish]

:hugs: What a huge exerience.... that must have been a tough time for you. I'd suggest going with what you feel is right. If you want to try a vaginal birth, then do it (letting the midwife/doctor/hospital know about your history, jsut in case) but if you feel that you want your baby to be born by c-section, then stick to you guns and ask for that. I don't think anyone would blame you for considering your options after everything you've been through!

[Missus S]

Wow.....I don't blame you for thinking about a C-section this time round! But then again some people have terrific vaginal births whilst others have terrible C-sections, and vice-versa!

I know that here in Adelaide you can certainly have an elective C-section even in the public hospitals.....so I presume it would be the same in your state.

There really are pros & cons to both methods of delivery, so just do your research and speak to lots of girlfriends about their deliveries if you can. Understandably, your anxiety about a vaginal delivery seems extremely high. In my experience, the thing I hated so much about my emergency C-section was having to spend 3 hours in recovery away from my family after what was just the most exciting time of my life, so I'm hoping for a VBAC next time.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do x :thumbsup:

[SilverStarfish]

I know that here in Adelaide you can certainly have an elective C-section even in the public hospitals.....so I presume it would be the same in your state.



Yup, ditto for QLD.

[OscarTheGrouch]

You poor thing, you really went through a terrible time, I don't blame you for having those feelings toward a VB. My DS was delivered with forceps. It was really horrific at the time. But after I delivered I was able to get up, have a shower and walk. I haven't even considered having a C-section. The thought of having abdominal surgery frightens the life out of me. I'm sure you'll make a decision that's right for you. Good luck.:fingerscrossed:

Edit: RPA is a great hospital. I worked there for a few years. I'm sure you'll enjoy your experience.

[tickle]

My SIL had a third degree tear with her first and did some research, I think she found there was only a 1% chance of it happening again. That said, if you are uncomfortable with the whole v/birth thing, the c/section is always an option. People definately do have good and bad experiences with both, so do as much research as possible. Did you have an assisted delivery last time?
My c/section was not the best experience by any stretch but you have to do what is right for you. They tried to push my SIL into a c/section with her second (she was public), so requesting one would be no problem.
Good luck with it all. Do what's right for you.;)

[RaryGirl]

I had a very traumatic VB with my first child and an extremely long recovery time. It's now 8 years later and we're having our second child and I have opted for a cs. The OB was very understanding (went public first time) and he agreed the mental trauma/stress of going through it all again wouldn't be good for me, let alone the chances of some of the physical problems that may occur.

This was a decision I didn't take lightly, but it is what is best for me. I'm positive and I feel I will heal quicker this time around and I'm looking forward to a positive birthing experience for me.

The whole thing is you need to do what is best for you and bubs. :yes: Do your research, talk to your OB and then do what you feel is best.

[susmamma]

Thanks everyone for your feedback.:)
Found a forum (from USA) where women were discussing vb after 3rd degree tear, some had great results but most were in a worse state and wished they'd had c/s. Some of the stories were horrific (mental note: must not cruise internet sites getting info :o ).
Have been trying to feel inside what the right decision is but am so confused that one day I'm completely for a c/s and the next I'm trying to sort out doula's for vb. Maybe preg hormones making brain activity harder??!!

xx

[tickle]

I did the same thing (the googling), when I found out about my complications in my pregnancy. At the time I told myself not to do it, but on reflection I'm glad I did. I then knew what *might* happen and this really helped me to remain calm when things went wrong when my DD was born. Sorry blabbing on now.
Try and get your hands on some statistics. Obviously the results of your scan will help in your decision too. My SIL had another third degree tear the second time round but hasn't got any ongoing issues from it. Wishing you the best.:thumbsup:

[reAllytee]

Id be interested to hear about what your advised to do etc as i too had a 3rd degree tear after a traumatic labour & yeah im still suffering 16mths on.
I was told straight away that i wasnt to vb again but the fact i dont know what im in for with a c/s & the horror stories that come with them freak me out. Im by no means ready to even ponder a vb yet even though im clucky as anything hehehe.
Good luck i hope your happy with whatever path you choose :hugs:

[Leeny]

I understand where your comming form completely, as i had a smiliar birth. If i was ever to decide to have another child, i'd be electing for a c-section from day dot. Just make sure YOUR happy and comfortable with whatever you choose. You deserve a nice experience :)

[susmamma]

Hi allyoo,
I just got back from the bum doctor after having 3 different sorts of test performed on my bum. To say it was awful is an understatement. They put a ballon up there and I had to squeeze it, then they put electrodes up there to see if I had nerve damage and finally a ultrasound probe to see if there was muscle damage from the tear.
OMG if I wasnt 30 weeks pregnant I would have gone out and got totally drunk after that little experience.
ANYWAY. The upshot is this. I can pick VB or C-sect. If I go VB and all goes well then I will have no further damage done to rectal area. If however it goes the same way as last time then I'll do long term damage. Aparently because I have a weakness there already this make me more suseptible to worse damage than someone without previous damage. Which frankly is just common sense I think. I have healed really well from the first birth and my levels are all within the normal range for muscle control, nerve control etc but I'm on the low side.
When we asked what most people would do in our situation he said most women would have a c-sect. He also said that it was my decision in the end but that statistically I would be better off selecting a c-sect.
So there you have it.
If you decide to investigate your 3rd degree tear I'd recommend it as at least I know what's going on down there now (plus why miss out on such an exceptional experience to have such lovely tests performed in front of 3 total strangers!:eek: )
Am now going to think long and hard about it all but think I'll be going the c-sect. Dont want to play russian roulette with my butt hole. I just dont think I can take the risk that it wont go pear shape again.
Thanks for all the feedback from everyone.
xx

[Kelle]

Hi Susmamma,
Sorry to hear you had such a terrible experience. I had a bad experience as well with my 1st, had a vaginal delivery ended up with numerous stitches and NO control over my bladder and when i say NO control I mean no control. As we are trying for our sencond at the moment I was also thinking of a possible C section but it scares the begeegbas out of me.
I think its what you most feel comfortable with. Playing russian roulette with your bum hole is a bit scarey :eek:
Good luck

[busylizzy]

Yup, ditto for QLD.
uh ah:no:. I begged for one & they wouldn't give me one. Think it depends on the hospital & doctor. Just check this out well in advance.

[busylizzy]

Susmamma - I wish you all the best with whatever you decide.:hugs: Hope you have a much better experience this time round.

[SilverStarfish]

uh ah:no:. I begged for one & they wouldn't give me one. Think it depends on the hospital & doctor. Just check this out well in advance.

Wow.. which hospital were you at? I had a non-emergency c-section at the Mater Mothers in Brisbane.

[busylizzy]

Wow.. which hospital were you at? I had a non-emergency c-section at the Mater Mothers in Brisbane.
Redlands (public hospital). Having #2 at the Mater Private with a private ob this time & after hearing about my traumatic labour last time he had no problems whatsoever about me having an elective c/s:thumbsup:.

[SilverStarfish]

:hugs: Poor you. How awful! I'm sure you will have a much more positive birthing experience this time :thumbsup:

[2s'nuff]

To all of you who had horrid experiences the first time round I feel for you.

I had an emergency CS the first time (didn't start labor at all) and experienced no problems at all during or after it. Although there are horror stories about CS, they can also go very well.

I had both an Epi and Spinal block. The spinal block to get me through the surgery and the Epi to deal with the pain until the next morning.

I had bub at 5.40 pm, was only in recovery for about an hour and and was up and about the next morning by 7am. With little discomfort and medication to deal with the pain.

If you are feeling at all scared about a VB I would choose the CS. I can only imagine that if you are scared/worried going into the birthing experience, you probably won't be relaxed enough to enjoy it anyhow.

Keep well,

Lisa

[GuruMama]

I understand your worries. I had a very long labour (34hrs) wih my first child and I too was EXHAUSTED! My daughter was delivered by emergency c-section after her heart rate dropped. Recovery took a long time, and mental recovery took even longer. Experiencing so much of a labour I felt for my second time around that I had laboured enough for the two already. A planned c-section for my second baby and it was a breeze. Your well rested, and have plenty of energy for the recovery, leaving heaps of energy for baby too. I had a pleasent experience 2nd time around, I was up and about within 12 hrs. I could have tried for a VB but there was a chance my scar could open (my babies are 14months apart) and I didnt want to risk a thing. I would advise a c-section if there is any chance you could undergo any risk of tearing, mental worries etc. Happy mother , happy baby. Good luck!

[susmamma]

Hi everyone,
Saw my ob yesterday and the colo-rectal surgeon had sent through his letter of recommendation. His advice was for me to have a c/s for this birth. Ob said "if colorectal surgeon says c/s, then you're getting a c/s".
I can't tell you how relieved I was. Part of me thought I might have been in for an uphill battle to justify having a c/s. We've booked in for early October and I felt quite teary (in a good way) driving home with DH that we were going to be able to deliver this baby by c/s.
I've been really sick with cold/flu this week and this morning I woke up breathing through both nostrils (I know this sounds silly but having been blocked all week it was a huge relief to feel air coming through my nose) and I remembered that yesterday we'd been booked in for a c-sect. I felt soooo relieved and even felt like doing a little dance :smiliedance: .
Didnt realise how stressed I'd been about the whole affair. For the first time in 7 months I felt like I was looking forward to meeting my baby. I was actually starting to get excited about what sex the baby was going to be and looking forward to the day he/she arrives.

I know now that going elective c/s is the right thing to do, the smile I've felt on my face all day confirms it!
Thanks for everyone's feedback, I've really appreciated reading all the posts,
Cheers :kiss: