Daycare-what's your opinion?

[MflUicM]

:wave:

I am currently at a crossroads in my life, confused and at a complete loss on what to do. I am hoping you can help me!

I am wondering whether or not to return to work 2-3 days a week and putting my ds, who will be one when/if I decide to do this in day care. I have tried researching but it's all so confliciting. Honestly though, more people seem to be against it then for it at his age.
Ideally, I would love to stay at home. I love spending my time with him, watching his development, sharing his smiles and tears. However, we do need some extra money-even just an extra $100 a week would be great! And the idea of getting back into the work force part-time is appealing. My DP thinks it's a no-brainer. DS will be happy with other kids, and DP was a daycare kid and he said he turned out fine, it's a simple and easy as that.
I am not so easily conviced.

So, what are your thoughts on this issue? I do know they range dramatically from parent to parent. But I am very interested in hearing different opinions.

I just want what is best for my DS, and I would hate for him to think I am abandoning him.

TIA. x.x

[Myztiks#1Fan]

i say go for it. i love daycare and wish i put my son in earlier than what i did. he has gained so much from it and i honestly believe its been one of the best things i have ever done for him. hoping to keep him at the same centre right up until he starts prep now as they have a kindy program as well.

[Refresh]

My personal opinion is that 1 is too young. I strongly believe that if you can stay at home to raise your kids then you should. They are only tiny for such a short time, they reallly are. No one can ever look after them as well as you and there is no one better to teach them and model life skills than you.

I believe 4 or even 5 is a good age to start....no younger.

Good luck with it. :)

[MumNeedsCoffee]

Don't go googling the opinions on daycare, it scared the s*** out of me.

It depends on your situation, you're doing nothing wrong if you need to put your child in daycare to earn the money to provide for your family. Daycare can be beneficial, your child has the chance to interact with other children and can play games etc.

But you're also doing nothing wrong if you choose to sacrifice some expenses and stay home with your child as long as possible. After all, no one can care for your child better than you.

Sorry I'm not helping you make a decision but I think if you're uncomfortable putting your child in daycare and you can stay at home then do that.

[Myztiks#1Fan]

another thing i want to add though is if your heart belongs at home with your DS and your not into working all that much, perhaps staying at home would be for the best for time being. working is a part of who i am. when i stopped working, i lost a part of myself and i also didnt enjoy being at home either. i couldnt do SAHM.

i wish you best on the choice you make as i would hate for someone to regret to go to work when they dont want to. sometimes work can just appear to be all that however after a few weeks, sometimes not even that long, people regret their choice

[nothanksbye]

I am totally anti daycare lol...so expect a different opinion.:D

I think its a necessary evil.
I think its not that good for children and especially under 3.

IMO They dont learn socialisation, they learn survival of the fittest.
Children that young need to learn sharing and it is best learned with mum and dad.
Mum and dad wont hit back or scream or snatch.

IMO a worker does not have the time to sit and teach one child all day. Kids learn to copy and mimic and daycare isnt always the best place to learn.

I just think that kids are better off at home with a single care giver and learn slowly and lovingly.

This is just my opinion and I totally respect that some parents have no choice.

[Refresh]

I am totally anti daycare lol...so expect a different opinion.:D

I think its a necessary evil.
I think its not that good for children and especially under 3.

IMO They dont learn socialisation, they learn survival of the fittest.
Children that young need to learn sharing and it is best learned with mum and dad.
Mum and dad wont hit back or scream or snatch.

IMO a worker does not have the time to sit and teach one child all day. Kids learn to copy and mimic and daycare isnt always the best place to learn.

I just think that kids are better off at home with a single care giver and learn slowly and lovingly.

This is just my opinion and I totally respect that some parents have no choice.

:iagree::iagree:

[kylza]

My ds was exactly one when he went to daycare at first I felt a little guilty, but now he is 20 months old and has come ahead in leaps and bounds.
The daycare he goes to is reasonably small (approx 6 to a room 0-2 age) with 2 teachers.
He loves it and it has helped him develop in more ways than one. He was always a VERY fussy eater but gobbles up all his food when seated with the other kiddies. He brings paintings/artwork home nearly everyday he goes.
He attends 2 days a week, one day I work from home (bookwork for our business) and the other day I actually work in our shop.
Do your research, suss out a few daycares and don't rush into anything.
Goodluck :)

[Opinionated]

Personally, I don't think a day care center is great for kids so young, but I think family day care is awesome. My youngest started at 18 months in family day care. At most, the carer has 4 pre-school age children. Being such a small group in a home environment, they are much more able to cater to the child's individual needs like nap times, and rather than your child having to get to know or deal with a number of carers and relief staff when carers are away there is only one. I think it is a much more natural environment.

I was really dubious about family day care initially. I worried that there was no one but the carer there most of the time, so how do you really know what goes on? However, after meeting with our carer, I just knew that she was the one and she is regularly "popped in on" by management of family day care. Most days, she only has her kids and mine. Occasionally when one of her kids is elsewhere there will be a different child. It is great and the kids love going to daycare. When I ask what we will do tomorrow, they usually answer "go to xxxx's house?" They love it and so do I.

The other bonus of family day care is that since they come into contact with a lot fewer children, they pick up a lot less bugs.

Check out all the care options available before you decide.

[Lily of the Nile]

I'm not in your situation but if it was me I think after 2 or even 3. 1 seems so young to be able to interact and socialise with other kids and I think they still need loads of one on one interaction especially when they are just starting to walk and talk? And for me I want to be the one who will influence my child the most in these early years.

[Deserama]

I am totally anti daycare lol...so expect a different opinion.:D

I think its a necessary evil.
I think its not that good for children and especially under 3.

IMO They dont learn socialisation, they learn survival of the fittest.
Children that young need to learn sharing and it is best learned with mum and dad.
Mum and dad wont hit back or scream or snatch.

IMO a worker does not have the time to sit and teach one child all day. Kids learn to copy and mimic and daycare isnt always the best place to learn.

I just think that kids are better off at home with a single care giver and learn slowly and lovingly.

This is just my opinion and I totally respect that some parents have no choice.

I agree with this too UNLESS a mother can honestly be a better mother working. But in all honesty you only have those first few years then they're off in institutionalised surroundings for the rest of their lives! You can always work later.

[Teley]

Don't go googling the opinions on daycare, it scared the s*** out of me.




:laughing:Yeah don't do that.

I'd say 1 is too young. Give it a year or so if you really want to go back to work - you'll never get those early years back, and they don't need that much socialisation that young.

[Pink Kisses]

Daycare has been a positive experience for my family but I know that isn't the case for everyone...maybe we are lucky to have found a great centre?? It's a personal choice and one you have to feel comfortable with. Good luck!

[nothanksbye]

anti day care?

Why?

I have one family member close by that works full time. I cannot rely on anyone to watch my kids. I had to go to work when my kids were young. Sometimes, people have to. I stayed at home with my second and I went nuts, and became severely depressed.

Childcare centres DO help children socially. I have watched my children play numerous times, and there certainly is no survival of the fittest stuff happening when I have watched them. I also have good relationships with the carers, and chat to them while watching the kids play.

Whether it be family daycare or a centre, kids are well looked after. I like the idea of centres a bit better than family day care. I had my kids in both, and they did better in the centre. Depends on the kids and the carer though, I've heard both sides of the coin and positive things about both.


thats why i said...its MY opinion.
if it works for you thats great.

I have spent a lot of time researching it and this is my findings.

[garfield13]

My personal opinion is that 1 is too young. I strongly believe that if you can stay at home to raise your kids then you should. They are only tiny for such a short time, they reallly are. No one can ever look after them as well as you and there is no one better to teach them and model life skills than you.

Good luck with it. :)
:iagree:

My dd is 18mths & i couldnt imagine sending her into care. We have mothers group once a fortnight & one friends kids and she is fine with this amount of socialisation, we are starting a playgroup next year also for 2hrs a week.
But you have to do what you need to do for your family, if you need to go back part time to help get by, then you need to. If its going to cause stress at home you not going back, then it may be best to go back

[nothanksbye]

Just an idea if you need the money..

I did night fill and then cash office at woolies.
I worked from 8 pm till midnight and got good money and NO daycare!

[guerin]

You really shouldn't look at other peoples opinions on whether you should put your child into daycare.

Think about how you feel and from your post its sounds as if your not ready even if your child is.

So my answer is get a job a night and don't put him in.

As to Family day care when I put my child in I chose against this due to the uncertainty of care. This is because it is only one person and if they are sick then you have no care and in the first year your child will get sick enough and you will have to take enough days off without having to worry about the extra days needed if they are sick or just decide they don't want to do it anymore.

That is a risk you may want to take, it was not a risk I wanted to take.

As for survival of the fittest that I have not seen and to be honest in the centre my DD goes to they try very hard to have the children play nicely.

[nothanksbye]

I respect your opnion, just asked why?

Maybe a poll should be conducted? Get an average?


ok...deep breath lol..
I think daycare was a savvy business idea. Parents were not too keen though.

So it was marketed as being beneficial...or necessary for social interaction.
It helped with the guilt and daycare took off.

Now we are only just starting to see the ramifications. ( I wont go into it as its something some parents dont want to know...but google it.)

Now some parents actually feel inferior and that daycare will do a better job then they can.

This is terrible.

Its a means to an end. A great system for the parent who needs it but honestly it makes me sick tomy stomach when I hear it praised as better then being home with mum or dad.

[MsMummy]

I think optimally a young child is cared for by one or two primary caregivers, but I don't think good quality daycare in moderate doses is harmful.

My son has been going to family daycare for 2 days a week since he was 3 months old. He is now 14 months old.

I was always going to have to return to work, so I thought I'd put him in sooner rather than later so he could get acquainted with the carer. The carer says the kids who start at about 1 year don't always take it as well, as they're reaching that peak attachment phase.

I must admit I'm not a fan of commercial centres. In saying that, I only visited one, which was an ABC one in the outer suburbs. It was horrible. Like a baby jail. There were two young women in the babies' room with slightly glazed disinterested looks. They were so busy feeding and changing the 7 or so young babies, that they didn't have time to do a lot else. We left very quickly.

Whereas the family day care mum I use has been doing it for 15 years, and the she has 4 kids of various ages (between 0 and 3) so it's not as demanding as 4 tiny babies. But, of course, it's not the same as one-on-one time like we would have at home.

I'm not a big fan of full time care for very young children either. I think 2 or 3 days isn't too bad. Even if it's okay for the children, it's hard on you.

I work 4 long days (he's in childcare 2 days, and with my partner 2 days) and I really miss him some days. My office overlooks a city square and I sometimes become despondent when I see parents and their young children out and about in the sunshine. It really breaks your heart some days.

But I wouldn't want to be at home full time either. I find the standard conversations at mothers' group makes me want to repeatedly bash my head against a wall sometimes. Seriously, you can only talk about Tupperware and the sleeping habits of babies so much. I enjoy the sense of control I have at work.

So, from my 1 year of doing this, I think the ideal is working 2 days a week with the child cared for by a family member (preferably) or a family day carer. But, that's just me. Ten other people with have ten other opinions.:D

[Mrs Nietzsche]

I think you have to ask this question for every child you have, at every stage they are in. There's never a clearcut one size fits all answer.

My DS is 16 mths and goes 4 hours a day, 3 times a week. Through a little trial and error we've found this works well for us, he enjoys his time there, I get uni done and spend time with my baby.

(This is another point - I think that because I have this time with just me and my new baby, I am much mroe bonded with her than if I had DS at home always - he is soo fullon, she would not get a lookin.)

This is what is working for us, with our setup, personalities, needs and lifestyle demands. I can't speak for anyone else's child, I don't even know what will suit my other children yet.

I do think that DS spending this time at daycare is better for him than spending it at home with me at the same time as I try to study. If I was to spend all day taking him on outings and whatnot then perhaps not, but I am not interested in doing that.

[MsMummy]

I do think that DS spending this time at daycare is better for him than spending it at home with me at the same time as I try to study. If I was to spend all day taking him on outings and whatnot then perhaps not, but I am not interested in doing that.

Maire, I strongly agree with that. I tried to work and look after him at the same time. That lasted for about 10 minutes. It was awful for both of us.

[FionaV]

Not working was never an option for me, so daycare was essential. The older two were in FDC, the younger two in a centre. I've been very happy with both and, so far, see no signs of major damage to the kids. I'm a teacher, which is a pretty kid-friendly occupation, and have never had to worry about school holiday care, which is a big plus for me.

What works for me (or was essential for me) isn't necessarily for everyone, though.

[cja]

Daycare has been a positive experience for my family but I know that isn't the case for everyone...maybe we are lucky to have found a great centre?? It's a personal choice and one you have to feel comfortable with. Good luck!:iagree:

[missie_mack]

anti day care?

Why?

I have one family member close by that works full time. I cannot rely on anyone to watch my kids. I had to go to work when my kids were young. Sometimes, people have to. I stayed at home with my second and I went nuts, and became severely depressed.

Childcare centres DO help children socially. I have watched my children play numerous times, and there certainly is no survival of the fittest stuff happening when I have watched them. I also have good relationships with the carers, and chat to them while watching the kids play.

Whether it be family daycare or a centre, kids are well looked after. I like the idea of centres a bit better than family day care. I had my kids in both, and they did better in the centre. Depends on the kids and the carer though, I've heard both sides of the coin and positive things about both.

Its interesting when you look at the case studies relating to cortisol levels in children who attend childcare as opposed to children who don't particularly those under the age of 3. Childcare is not so great for the mental health of most children, to put it quite simply.

I returned to work a couple of months before DS turned 2 and even then I really had to umm and ahh about it. Until he turned 2 it was only 2 short days a week and eventually 3. Despite DS being an only child and craving the extra interaction with children in hindsight I think he would have been better if I could have waited until after he was 2. At one they are still really babies.

Have you looked into options on how you can earn the extra money at home?? I understand that sometimes we have to work however if it were me I would be waiting another 6 months to a year when their more mobile and speaking a little better :)

[Little-Pink-Hen]

speaking from a preschool teachers POV
id say yes put him in if your comfortable
i dont think bubs at 1 are too young, my dd is starting at 4 months. but i understand child care isnt for everyone at this age. and it is very nerve wracking putting bub in :yes:
but some bubs thrive in day care. day care isnt just babysitting ;) so its a whole environment designed to develop key learning areas for each developmental stage and age. it can be beneficial for both parent and child

benefits of care, bub can develop socially and be exposed to a lot of language development opportunities. he will be challenged to develop milestones and new skills.
children of you ds age dont generally make "friends" but i have seen children in this age at preschool make friends.
since your in NSW id go on to the NCAC website and search centres in your area. KU centres are great centres

id recommend at least 2 days and spaced out if you can during the week so he can settle in faster.

when you go in, look for carers who are in with the kids, on the floor, hopefully you get introduced to each staff member by name, ask for different staff qualifications, and look to see they have a lenience and are accredited. notice if it smells nice, if there is art on the walls hopefully they arnt all "cookie cutter the same" (may have it taken down or maybe all christmas stuff) ask about menus and programs and record keeping for your child

good luck with your decision

[Babblings]

I am totally anti daycare lol...so expect a different opinion.:D

I think its a necessary evil.
I think its not that good for children and especially under 3.

IMO They dont learn socialisation, they learn survival of the fittest.
Children that young need to learn sharing and it is best learned with mum and dad.
Mum and dad wont hit back or scream or snatch.

IMO a worker does not have the time to sit and teach one child all day. Kids learn to copy and mimic and daycare isnt always the best place to learn.

I just think that kids are better off at home with a single care giver and learn slowly and lovingly.

This is just my opinion and I totally respect that some parents have no choice.

:iagree::iagree::iagree:

And this is from someone who has left child care centres as a worker and now operates a family day care business.....for many reasons (being able to stay home with ds and contributing to our income are two of the main pros)

I am anti Long Day Care- Child Care Centres and i realise not all family Day care providers are ideal....but i am reasponsible for the care i provide and will not provide anything less than what i would expect DS to receive if he were in care. I love the ratios as well.....i believe they are more beneficial

But as a parent i don't think it is appropriate to put kids into childcare until they are atleast 2.5yrs old.....IMO and not full time care either!

[lochiebearsmum]

hi i was TOTALLY anti day care to the point where i said i would never ever put lochie in... however as a single mum i had my hair done for the first time ever last week and lochie was a mess... he was left with my mum and could not handle the seperation process at all... it broke my heart to think that to a degree i have let him down by never leaving him ever, and thought how will he ever survive going to kindy or prep without being away from me so after a huge long mental struggle with myslef i have decided to put lochie in one day just for 2 hours from 9 till 11.... in someways daycare is hard for children at a young age but i also wonder if i have also been cruel by leaving it this long to do so... if you need to return to work pop him in but check your centres and go with your gut i looked at many many centres before i found the right one

[delirium]

I personally would put a 12 month old in care 2-3 days a week, my feeling is that's too young. My DS, 2.5, not long started DC half a day per week for my sanity. Being a boy part of me says he may be about 6 months too young still, but I had to weigh up me coping as a mother with him being in DC a few months earlier than I planned.

But you have to follow your gut. I guess what you have to weigh up is what benefits your family best right now; being home with your child or a few hundred dollars more to make things a bit more comfortable. Only you know the answer to that ;)

[Boobycino]

If you feel comfortable with day care, definately consider it.

I'm not a fan of putting my own son in childcare, but I'd consider it after he's 2 years old if I wanted to work doing something other than childcare.

Though, I'm currently earning an extra $100 per week and next year I'll be earning $200 as I'm picking up extra hours - and because I work with children I dont have to subtract the cost of childcare from my earnings.

I think its something well worth considering for parents who want to make some more money - and the more people I talk to and the more I think about it myself, being a mother yourself should be a prerequisit (sp) for working in childcare :yes: There are also non-centre childcare options (like creches at gyms and community centres) that a more likely to take on untrained, inexperienced carers, or mums with bubba in tow.

[little bean]

Due to necessity, I put DD into daycare 2 days a week from 11 months. Although I had always been against it, I believe it has been really beneficial for her. She is now 2 and a half and is doing really well - she's very outgoing and confident, and she loves all the art activities and singing at daycare.

Some friends waited until later to start their kids in care and have difficulty because the older children are much more aware of what's going on and they're afraid to be separated from mum (making both daycare and babysitting very stressful for both mother and child). DD has learned social skills, learned to listen to other adults, gets to take part in games and art activities, and most importantly she has learned that mum can go away but she always comes back.

I think 2-3 days is ideal (sometimes these are short days at daycare if I'm not working). That way, she gets some interaction with others but still has plenty of time with me.

Do what's best for you and your family. :hugs:

[ChelsLuke]

I have my DS1 in care but i also work in his place of care whilst heis there, so some of the time he is with me and other he is with the ECW whom i have a good relationship with.

Its a tough situation and i think its each to their own. I put my DS4 in to care at 3 as he was so full on, and once his sister started Kindy 2 days a week and then school his behaviour got wrose due to separtion anxiety with her. There is a 19 month gap between my eldest the Occasional Care is in a room attached to the kindy and they allowed my son to go spend time at the kindy to help with his issues. It was like having twins and then pulling them apart. and making them live in seperate houses. This said i was involved in the kindy and often helped out where i could.

I have seen parents who drop their kids off and really i dont feel that they should soem kdis scream the enitre time and its jsut heartbreaking but others lvoe it and need that interaction. its such a tough call to make. I cant help with different care I tried FDC and hated it i was a studying mum and would get given placement then had it pulled because someone who was working needed a spot and i was not top priority, even though my kids had just got used to the carer. After putting up with this onand off for a couple of months i pulled them out all together. \

I do agree though Cherish your kids while they are young, If you have to wrk make sure it is worth it, you can not get back time you lost. I worked for 6 months when DD was 2 and DS was 6 months I missed out on so much and I hate myself for it i cannot even say that finanically it was worth it cos it wasnt. the negs outweighed the positives, extra petrol, second car, More takeaways, dirtier house, not seeing my kids. My CC provider knew my kids better then me i hated having to ask her when they slept last why they are so grouchy etc. It was horrible.

But thats me some people make it work and dont have any dramas. I hope you find what is best for you just please please donot do anything that you dont want to do it will make you and your family miserable and none of it will be worth it, and you will end up hating yourself and its not a good feeling.

Have you tried study, i understand money is tight but there are government grants that will pay for you too study. I did this to get me through the toddler years when i needed to find and keep my identity. It helped me learn I am not who i was 7 years ago. if you want help with it let me know
Bec

[melbryan]

You will get told that they don't need it but you know your kid and you'll realise what is best.
Next year I will return 2 days per week because I don't want to leave my job so I do the minimum. A nanny will come to the house to look after them and one day I am off they will go to preschool together (Ds 2 & 3) 2 and 3 year old. I will be able to spend one on one time with my little girl who is turning 1, she is always competing with 3 brothers for my time so it will be nice. My kids don't need it but I figure I can't always do everything with them I did with Ds1 so it is their time away to have fun, play , sing and do some structured activities.
My DS1 I had to put in an extra day be because he needed the stimulation he is a very bright boy and was wasting alot of time in front of the tv or computer which I am not fond of. Good luck with your decision you sound like ur a great mum and trying to do the best for everyone. I couldn't be a stay at home mum I need time for myself even if it is work, always been a juggler and have tried to reach a balance between everything in my life.

[Deserama]

Its interesting when you look at the case studies relating to cortisol levels in children who attend childcare as opposed to children who don't particularly those under the age of 3. Childcare is not so great for the mental health of most children, to put it quite simply

It's not something that is NEEDED despite being bombarded with the neverending barrarge of ....social development this and social development that when social development is designed to be developed within the family structure. Yes they will survive but there's more to life than merely survival. We want kids to thrive not just survive. As I've said....they will be stuck in institutionalised surroundings for the rest of their lives....I think it's important for the first 2 - 5 years to establish the family unit.

[Jezzy]

My boys were put into day care 2 days a week when they turned 1 so that I could go back to work after my maternity leave. I was very happy with the day care they were in and when I go to pick them I look thru the window first to see where they are and what they are doing, they are always happy and playing (I tell my DH that this is my way of spying on the boys and the centre's staff)
Having said that they have been endlessly sick with one thing after another and I know people say it is great for their immune system it is not great for mummys (lack of) sleep and it is horrible having sick kids all the time.
The other thing I found is that when the centre ring if the boys are sick and need to be picked up early that I have to call in sick for work or leave work early and it is really late notice for them to be replacing me (I am a nurse) and i felt terribly guilty about that but what can you do. Now i no longer work and the boys go one day a week because of the increase money out of our pockets now that I am not working, in the new year I will be looking for some night fill work as well just to keep a bit of money coming in.
There are a lot of things to consider but for some people the option of staying at home with their children is not a viable one.
I think you have a good array of input from this thread and I hope that it helps you make the best decision for your family.

Cheers:santa:

[poppie]

I think everyones circumstances are so different that it is hard to comment on what you should do. Personally, if money was not a MAJOR issue, I would not use daycare for such a young child. I don't think it is a good idea to let someone else 'care' for your children, especially before your child can talk. Just have a look on here for posts of people saying things like 'I am not sure what happened' at daycare. I have a few friend who have their 1 year olds in care and I often here the comments about how their DS or DD had a dry nappy in the afternoon but 'i know they would have given DS/DD enough to drink??' or 'he/she is so grumpy after daycare....I am sure he/she is fine'. I am sure in most cases that they are fine and they did get enough to drink and they are totally happy. You will never really know though because you were not there and they can not speak for themselves. JMO.

[alexsmom]

hi- day care has been a great experience for my ds! he went in for 2 days a week when he was 8 mo, hes 2 1/2 now and loves it! The center we are in are exceptionally good- they seem to genuinely love the children and are very afectionate towards them. I went back to work beacause- like some of the others-it was something I needed to do for me. I do not feel in any way that my ds has been harmed by daycare, in fact I think he has thrived there. He is a loving, friendly outgoing and independent little boy. At day care they do a lot of activities that i always mean to do but dont- like painting, cutting and pasting, play doh, sand play etc. the socialization aspect is good to (SO NOT! survival of the fittest as someone esle said!!!) -he has little friends at school and we see some outside care now too :) I really think its been good for him!

i do agree with Jezzy- ds does catch a lot of colds flu etc from daycare which he then passes on to his sister:rolleyes: but he could actually pick up bus anywhere really!

i TOTALLY agree that we should cherish them when they are little because it goes by wayyyy to fast, but IMO day care 2 days a week isnt neglecting or not cherishing them lol. Its what works for our family.

You could try it for one day a week for a while and see how your dc (and you!! ) cope with it. I hope you figure out what works for you!

[ILovePink]

I am all for daycare! I think it is great. I believe it does teach children the social skills that are necessary to deal with going to school etc.

I put my son in full time day care from 6 months old. His centre was really close to my work so I spent EVERY lunch time with him. He was so used to me coming and going and didn't get phased by me leaving at all.

There were a number of children who started much later ie 1.5-2 years and didn't always get used to the fact that mum (or dad) was leaving and would be quite unsettled. I believe the later you leave the harder it gets.

When my son started school it was very obvious who the daycare kids were. They were all noticibly well adjusted and adaptable to change. The teacher was very quick to comment on this as well and even went as far as to say that she prefered the daycare kids cause they were used to some sort of routine and structure. Not all but most of the non-daycare kids were running a muck and not following instruction.

I guess there are plenty of arguments for and against day care and of course it really depends on the child. I do however some people have a very narrow minded view of childcare but that is their issue. I don't understand why you would think it is bad, but that is my own narrow minded view.

Each to their own I say.

Good luck with your decision. It is a hard one! If you do decide to but you child in daycare it will be a hard adjusment to make but it does get easier!

[Jaspat24]

I hate leaving my son in daycare...but we need the money. I work the bare minimum (1 day a week, and one weekend shift a fortnight) and was going to increase it next year...but now i'm having second thoughts cos i don't want DS to go to daycare more than he has to. we're just going to have to make do with what we have.

[MflUicM]

A big big thankyou to each and everyone of you for responding!

The array of opinions is exactly the conflict I feel in my head. After more discussion with DP and sleeping on it, I really do feel in my heart it isn't time. I think the differing opinions of daycare aside, it's more I am not ready for this. Im confident I would regret it, and I am forever aware how precious this time is.

There is the possibility of occasional day care, just to get stuff done etc. I certainly have no objections to placing in in ODC for a couple of hours Once or twice a month. Unless we are REALLY struggling, which we aren't, I don't think I will consider it again until his over 2yrs old.

BUT thankyou all again. All your reply's have helped. I am glad you have all found a way to make yourselves and your families happy :)

xxx

[UmmInayah]

My personal opinion is that 1 is too young. I strongly believe that if you can stay at home to raise your kids then you should. They are only tiny for such a short time, they reallly are. No one can ever look after them as well as you and there is no one better to teach them and model life skills than you.

I believe 4 or even 5 is a good age to start....no younger.

Good luck with it. :)

:iagree: i went through a similar issue with my dd who is 2.5. i didn't want to send her to daycare, but dh did. we ended up not sending her as we agreed that she was too young to go to daycare and if i could be at home to look after her, all the better.

problem with researching stuff on the net is that you can find anything to support any side of any argument.

i guess ultimately it is up to you. but if it were me, i would stay home as long as i could with my little one. there is plenty of time to earn more money when your baby is older.