What to do with overtired bub?

[Rainbowbrite]

MJ is 14months old & is usually bf to sleep, which was working great but lately have been having problems.

I decided not to bf her between about 7pm & 4am which is ok, but if she doesnt fall alseep on the breast at night, she wont settle, same if she does fall asleep but wakes when i put her down.

She screams, yells, cry's etc. Pushes me away & basically it upsets all of us.

Should I give in, let her play for longer then when she gets whingy, clingy etc bf her again till she falls asleep? I did it tonight & she is asleep on the lounge with DH :) I really hate hearing her cry so cc is not happening :no: I know for a fact she is tired, but fights sleep. Some nights i leave her with DH so i can go have a bath & she almost goes to sleep, but as soon as she realises she's nodding off, she screams & wakes herself back up :crying:

Does anyone have any advice?

[tickle]

Sorry RB not much advice from me. I know it is no substitute but have you tried to introduce a new comfort item for MJ? I found when I was weaning DS off the hourly night comfort feeds, he found himself 'attatching' to his pillow. He isn't breastfed anymore and his pillow case is now his security. Now when he wakes he finds his pillow case and drops back off. Sorry I'm not much help.:hugs:

[SilverStarfish]

:hugs: No advice... but I'm jsut the same. I hate to hear my DD cry :crying:

[draught]

Have you tried patting her to sleep? DD2 loves it - now if she is overtired and can't settle herself when I go in she will ask "pat mummy" and it always works (and this from a mother who you know has used cc as well :rolleyes: )

[Goosie22]

Hi RB
I used the patting too, with a nice cuddle and a song. I dont think there is anything wrong with feeding her either if you feel you need too. Also I know its cold right now but a walk around the block slinged up always sent my boys off too (maybe you could strap her in and do laps of your house?).

Hope you work it out.

[Rainbowbrite]

Thanks for all the advice & support posts :hugs: I'll try the patting but MJ refuses to lay down if she's tired. I think she knows she'll fall asleep so fights it. On the comfort item, she has a blanket she loves & a teddy who she will put to bed, cover with a blanky, lay down & cuddle for about 30 seconds then she gets back up & runs away :rolleyes:

On the sling idea, she's gone off it :crying: she just won't settle in the sling anymore. With her wriggling in the ring sling, she loosens it too much & i worry she'll fall out. Really wish i had a hug-a-bub. Must invest in one :yes:

Thanks again, have to try things out.

[elissas]

Maybe try a different position in the sling? Maybe pop her on your back or something? I pop DS in the sling (belly to belly at the moment) and go about my business. Sometimes he gets wriggly, so I put him on the hip carry and then move him around when he starts getting a bit quieter.

Sometimes if I give all my energy to helping him get to sleep it makes it worse because he finds the interaction stimulating.

Instead I'll do something like vacuum, hang out clothes, go for a walk, tidy the house, do shopping, or ring and talk to someone else while pacing the house - all while he's in the sling. It all becomes backgrund noise and activity for him and he dozes off easier (sometimes quicker, but if not quicker then at least there's no energy struggle between us).

[miss_moe]

we all read books in bed together, then we tell her its time to sleep, sing a lullaby and lay with her until she is asleep. it works well for us. DD is 14months too.

all the best

[babylover111]

A technique the baby whisperer recommends is pick up put down. Which i have used and works very well!
When she cries pick her up and comfort her but the second she stops crying put her back down, and just place your hand on her back to let her know your there for her. If she continues crying pick her up and put her down as soon as she stops again.
Wait in the room with her until shes in a deep sleep and the more you do it she'll fall asleep faster, its teaching her to fall asleep by herself.

It takes a lot of patience but hopefully it will work for you! :)

[reAllytee]

I usually find sitting with Boof & rocking him a little just soothing him patting his head or something helps settle him down.
I also have to say that i do the put down then if he starts crying i pat him & reassure him but if he keeps going then i pick him up & cuddle him again then i start all over again until he is ready to sleep.
I only do that if i know he is really really tired because even me holding him ends up in him feeling over stimulated so he screams more.
But we mainly use the first way to get him off to sleep & also through the middle of the nite if he wakes up.
I think the main thing i found was finding something they we liked that obviously didnt let him cry his heart out so we were comfortable with & then stuck with it. It takes time for a "routine" to work even if its not a routine as such because as soon as you change something they arent happy. Thats probably also why MJ is crying etc is because you have stopped that feed so she is against the change in her routine. So try & stick with something but if you find after a week or so its not working then i would try something else.
Good luck its soooo hard to work out what to do i still have some nites where im wondering whether he will go off to sleep !
Stupid thing is though if DP puts him down at nite or even for his day nap he may talk to himself for 10mins but he falls straight off to sleep :banghead:
One of these days he may do it for me :rolleyes:

[Rainbowbrite]

Stupid thing is though if DP puts him down at nite or even for his day nap he may talk to himself for 10mins but he falls straight off to sleep
One of these days he may do it for me

Oh i wish MJ would go to sleep for DH. He has gotten her to sleep ONCE! Thats it. Mind you, he doesnt try :banghead:

Might try laying down with her in bed feeding her till she goes off. That way, i'm not moving her & walking through the house etc.

Thanks so much for the help, i'll let you all know how it goes.

[4mumnbub]

DS gets up at 7am, i give his milk then let him play around the house. he loves pushing his walker...at 9am, i give his cereal then let him play again for ages...between 11am and 12nn, i give his lunch...then take him to his bed by noon and give a bottle of water or milk and he'd sleep until 3pm :D then give his snack and let him play again until 6pm when he gets his dinner and bed time at 7pm :)

[reAllytee]

Oh i wish MJ would go to sleep for DH. He has gotten her to sleep ONCE! Thats it. Mind you, he doesnt try :banghead:


Oh we only worked this out last month because i forced DP to actually do something as i was going nuts !!!!!!
Sometimes i wonder whether im a single parent or not :banghead:

[Rainbowbrite]

Oh we only worked this out last month because i forced DP to actually do something as i was going nuts !!!!!!
Sometimes i wonder whether im a single parent or not :banghead:

Sounds like us :yes:

[Rainbowbrite]

DS gets up at 7am, i give his milk then let him play around the house. he loves pushing his walker...at 9am, i give his cereal then let him play again for ages...between 11am and 12nn, i give his lunch...then take him to his bed by noon and give a bottle of water or milk and he'd sleep until 3pm :D then give his snack and let him play again until 6pm when he gets his dinner and bed time at 7pm :)

Sounds great in theory but we've never been one for routine. Too many things get in the way & stuff it up.

[jessgray]

this is how i get ds off to sleep...
its a never ending battle lol

i will give him dinner (sometimes he refuses it) then a bath then he will cuddle up next to me and have a bottle (if he is super tired this will put him to sleep) then if he isnt asleep, he has a play till he is tired and then when he is tired he cuddles up to me and hugs my belly and goes to sleep.

[Notchalk]

:hugs: Rainbowbrite!

Just wondering why you have decided not to feed after 7pm? I might have missed something tho.

What we do at night is after dinner, a quiet play time, then when he gets a bit whingy its time for a shower, massage, sleeping bag then lights out completely and breastfeed. Either this puts him to sleep, or he comes off and shakes his head (I can feel it - he's saying no ;)) then I put him into his cot. Sometimes the dummy is all he needs. He doesn't have another comfort item. There are two small teddies in his cot, but honestly, he couldn't care les whether they are in there or not!

If this doesn't work, I pick him up and sway while singing "Daisy" until he stops fidgeting. Then I put him down. He usually sleeps for 2 - 3 hours... then I BF him to sleep again, and again and again all night.... every 2 - 3 hours, or more often, sometimes.

If MJ wakes over night, what do you usually do? DS sleeps the same whether co-sleeping or cot sleeping (in our room). She seems like a smart girl. I might steal the idea of having a stuffed toy going to sleep at the same time, too... see if that makes a difference.

Oh, and that pick up put down thing doesn't make sense to me... but YMMV!

Jo

[Rainbowbrite]

Just wondering why you have decided not to feed after 7pm? I might have missed something tho.

I decided a few weeks back that i would bf MJ at about 7pm, & 9times out of 10 she sould go to sleep. She would then wake every 1-2hrs through the night & it was killing me. I was exhausted etc so stopped it.


If MJ wakes over night, what do you usually do?

When she wakes during the night, i just wait till she's ready for hugs & she goes back to sleep. Sometimes she'll have a scream but she's right there with me, & after a few minutes will lay down with me again.


Oh, and that pick up put down thing doesn't make sense to me... but YMMV!

Glad i'm not the only one. MJ would go balistic if i picked her up then put her back down.

Last night, I bf her to sleep at 6pm (she was very tired), then put her into bed at 7.30. She woke, fought it, but went back to sleep after no more than 5 minutes. She didnt wake up till after 11pm. Then it was business as normal, slept with me hugging her till she woke up at 3.30, i bf, she went back off till just before 6 & has been awake since.

All in all, not a bad night.

THanks again for all the posts :)

[Notchalk]

OOh, not too bad a night for you then?

DS had a really good night, too... Asleep by 8, woke at 11 for BF and settled straight back into cot, woke at 12, so brought him to bed with us without a feed, and he stirred all night but didn't wake until SIX AM!!! Then he BF back to sleep until just after 8am!!

Oh the blissful sleep.

Hope it works out for you :)

Jo