Public tolieting your thoughts/feelings/opinions

[Little-Pink-Hen]

I have had a few convos relating to children going to the toilet in public recently from family and friends and just wanted to know other peoples thoughts and feelings on weather they think it is socialy acceptable and if not is there ever a time it could be acceptable ??

Story 1 : little girl 9 yrs, parents pull over to let dd go to the toilet on side of the road. They had been in the car under and hour and was less than 500 meters from the planed pit stop at mcdonalds. It was obvious to the car in front that was travelling with them that DD was doing number 2.

Story 2 : girl 3.5yrs. Riding on train home. Been on train for 30 mintues when she needed to do a wee. Adult with her put a towel on the train seat, sat girl on and let her go directly onto the towel

story 3 : talking about toileting with mum if boy 3.2yrs and she says "I let him go every where he wants, it's the best thing about having ds, I tell him the world is his toilet"

What would you do in each situation?

[bumMum]

WHAT?
lol i couldnt not respond.
that is weird..
and I am not at all weird about people toileting their kids "in public" i.e. if you go to the park and there is no bathroom and you walk them into somewhere private.. espescially when they are young and are not good at all at "holding on"... or I dunno.. camping.. a long road trip where there is no bathroom... I don't think it is a good idea to tell kids to go in their nappy if they are aware of what they are doing and I don't think you should ask them to hold on...
BUT
in aaall of the scenarios you explained.. I am confused.. are you sure?
with scenario one.. did the girl have a problem where she couldn't hold on to her number twos? bad tummy?? if traffic could see.. that seems wrong.. I dunoo what to say. maybe they didn't mean for that to happen
scenario two...that is foul... i thought they had toilets on trains.. ? I don't understand as I can't think of a reason why you would be on a train for 30 minutes with a child if the train had no toilet.. but I would not use a towel. worst come to worst I would get off the train and get on the next one!

[Myztiks#1Fan]

I don't understand as I can't think of a reason why you would be on a train for 30 minutes with a child if the train had no toilet.. but I would not use a towel. worst come to worst I would get off the train and get on the next one!

its easy to be on a train for 30mins. if i take coop to the museum or city, its a 40min train ride. same with bus, bus is about an hour trip. most of the trains in brisbane dont have toilets on them. i think only the ones heading to the gold coast generally do but i am not too sure about that.

[bumMum]

its easy to be on a train for 30mins. if i take coop to the museum or city, its a 40min train ride. same with bus, bus is about an hour trip. most of the trains in brisbane dont have toilets on them. i think only the ones heading to the gold coast generally do but i am not too sure about that.
ah ok well i didn't realize that! i have never been on a train longer than 10 minutes..
except the long distance ones.. which do have toilets..
so what do you have to do with the toilet situation then?

[codswallop]

i wouldn't in #3 encourage DS to think of the world as his toilet
but with small kids some times now means now!!!

#1 i have been there my self, sometimes even if it is only another 30 odd min to that maccas by the highway you need to go (like i said) now!!

scenario #3 is probably the strangest
but yep id do the same thing!
those train loos are filthy, i wouldn't let my dog pee in one let alone my DD and as we are only just starting to be able to go out with out nappies (one week tomorrow big girls pants :D ) then yep id consider doing that
if i was to get of at the next station(which could still be 10-15 min away) it would be any where between 1-2 hours till my next train, that and the fact that most of the stations dont have public loos any way

[Leisa21]

Wow! My sons just come out of toilet training and yeah I've stopped on the side of the road to let him wee but that was 200km from the nearest town! DH said he had to pull over in peak our with ds to wee on the side of the road, it's an emergency and he wasn't even 2.

I try and avoid buss travel, although DS doesn't seem to have trouble holding on. I offer him to go but there's always mor important things to do. When he asks for toilet I know I've got a couple of minutes up my sleave. I'd get off the train!

[codswallop]

ah ok well i didn't realize that! i have never been on a train longer than 10 minutes..
except the long distance ones.. which do have toilets..
so what do you have to do with the toilet situation then?
im on a :country line" hahaha
and its a 45-1hr trip from my stop to town

[Myztiks#1Fan]

ah ok well i didn't realize that! i have never been on a train longer than 10 minutes..
except the long distance ones.. which do have toilets..
so what do you have to do with the toilet situation then?

coop is geneally fine as he always go before hand at the station before train comes. however if he needs to go, i dont have any hesitation getting off at next stop. i wont let him wet himself and make him go backwards esp since he is fully toilet trained and i never carry spare clothes around either as i have faith in him. sometimes we will just jump on the local bus that takes an hour to do the loop(he loves buses) and he is fine not to go.

[bumMum]

it seems like toilets are more convenient for me than most people hahaha... I don't see a problem with anything people do if they have no other choice really.. I would not like to encourage a toilet training kid to hold on or wee in a nappy as I said earlier. sorry to be so stupid about 1. trains and 2. toilet training... I will probably soon start learning about it though as my son is 2 and starting to say "wee" and "poo".. oh no
anyway here the train stops every 5 minutes and the toilets aren't that bad.. ok well they are pretty bad but I will go there if I have to..
if a child pees on a towel wouldnt it go straight through to the seat?
maybe they should invent pee mats that absorb any moisture! :ecomcity:

[sweetseven]

I have problems with Miss8. She goes to the toilet before leaving drama, but halfway through our 40 minute drive home, is desperate and screaming if I dont stop to allow her to go. I used to have to let her go by the side of the road, but have since changed route so there is a park with a public toilet on the way to stop at.

I do not understand how she can be fine for several hours at home, or at school, but cannot handle a 40 minte drive (when she has emptied immediately prior to departure).

In Brisbane, the trains typically stop every 2-3 minutes (unless express in which case it theremay be a 20 minute stretch) but the small station toilets are almost always locked. If the towel was in a plastic bag that might've been okay, but I still dont like the idea.

[Cordelia]

heheh sometimes you just dont have a choice

altho going on a towell!!!! :P hahah - that is desperation... I'm trying to think of alternative if it was ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY. .... really, little kids dont have a huge amount of wee do they - like when DD has an accident in her undies it's not going to wet everything in sight.

Lesson to be learnt: Go before you leave!!! Plan regular toilet stops!!!

[Theophania]

Hmmm the number two on the side of the road freaked me out a little.... I would be mortified if I had to stop in traffic for Coop to do a poop :laughing:

The towel on the train thing... hmm well its better than the child just wetting themselves which would have been worse for the chair, I would imagine the towel would have caught most of it and saved the seat as someone else said I don't think a child could wee through a towel that easy.. Me on the other hand :laughing: I remember so many times getting on the train to/from the city after many many drinks and just about bursting my bladder on the trip... I did always manage to hold on though even if it did bring a tear to my eyes :laughing:

As for the little boy and 'the world being his toilet', I mean its grose but its true. Men don't know how easy they have it... (I will show my penis envy here lol). Whilt I would not encourage Coop to 'pee freely' anywhere he wanted, it is alot easier if a little boy or even a man need to go as they can pretty much do it anywhere.... I hate having a party at my place with lots of men as they seem to forget I have a toilet inside and all head towards the corner of the fence or something and I am forever reminding them that we do have a toilet inside lol... bloody men :rolleyes:

[Little-Pink-Hen]

WHAT?
lol i couldnt not respond.
that is weird..
and I am not at all weird about people toileting their kids "in public" i.e. if you go to the park and there is no bathroom and you walk them into somewhere private.. espescially when they are young and are not good at all at "holding on"... or I dunno.. camping.. a long road trip where there is no bathroom... I don't think it is a good idea to tell kids to go in their nappy if they are aware of what they are doing and I don't think you should ask them to hold on...
BUT
in aaall of the scenarios you explained.. I am confused.. are you sure?
with scenario one.. did the girl have a problem where she couldn't hold on to her number twos? bad tummy?? if traffic could see.. that seems wrong.. I dunoo what to say. maybe they didn't mean for that to happenen
scenario two...that is foul... i thought they had toilets on trains.. ? I don't understand as I can't think of a reason why you would be on a train for 30 minutes with a child if the train had no toilet.. but I would not use a towel. worst come to worst I would get off the train and get on the next one!

Secnario 1 no nothing wrong she just needed to go they were only 5 mins from the maccas

Secanrio 2 we live in nsw the suburban trains stop every 2-5 mins max than trains come every 15-20 minutes. Most ppl in the out suburbs of Sydney catch a hour long train to the city to work. The country trains have toilets but like a pp said I wouldn't let my dog wee in them.
They were on their way home from the city on a suburban train.

[Deserama]

Wow...ummmmm I don't know what to say. We've only had one situation happen where my 5 year old was that desperate that she was crying and we were driving around the suburbs and couldn't even find a service station so we ducked into the university and let her go in a bushy area. 1. it was nightime and 2. no one was around.

Other than that, in all my years of parenting I have never come across any other desperate situation *shrugs*

[mum2bubba]

What the heck?

They let their kids pee on the train seat and tell their little boy 'the world is his toilet?'

Yuck! :barf::banghead:

[SassyMummy]

I've peed on SO MANY roadsides... lol. We were travellers when I was young... we drove long distances often, and so I've peed on many rural roadsides.

Toilet has already been preferable, but if the option is p*ss all over the car, or pull up and pee... well, it's pretty clear which is the better choice.

I'm not sure about the train situation... I don't drive so I've been on 1-2 hour train trips with DD before... but she's never had to go to the toilet on there... I make sure she goes right before we leave. Before that, she was just in nappies so it didn't matter anyway. When she was starting to use a toilet rather than a nappy, I'd still keep in a nappy on long trips for fear of her needing to pee.

TBH, I'd probably GET OFF the train at a station then wait for hte next train if the situation arose. I've done it so she can spew before...

I don't think little boys (or big ones either) should be encouraged to pee wherever they damn well please. I think a toilet should be ideal, same as for a girl.

[KatiesMum]

For your scenarios

# 1 - 500m from a toilet and they let her go on the side of the road? My DD is 3.5 and she can hold on for a minute or two to get to the toilet. A 9yr old should be able to run that far and go to toilet ...

# 2 - I would get off the train at the next stop, then continue on the next train. No I would not let my DD go on a seat ...

# 3 - I wouldnt be teaching a young child 'the world is your toilet' ..... but I have let DD go in the park where there is no toilets available. (In fact the park that we usually go to has no toilets, so all the kids usually go near a tree. Even No 2's :eek: sounds gross ... but its a dog park, so picking that up with a dog bag is not really any different to picking up the doggie doo-doo .... and my chances of getting her to a toilet from the park are non-existant.)

[CheekyChicken]

#2 is disgusting and not ok! Other people have to use those seats, it could make someone sick!!!

My DH seems to have toilet emergencies... true story- this is gross... we were at a resort in Asia and had had a large, rich dinner. We were walking back to the hotel and somehow ended up going a back way... they were building so it wasn't the best place to be (machinery and scaffolding about). DH decides he needs to poo right then and there (we are in the grounds of the resort so less than 5 mins to our room). He ducks under the building behind some bushes- it's night time as well, so dark. I am standing there by myself in a place I shouldn't be and a whole group of staff start approaching including a manager. They want to know what I am doing all alone, at night in the back part of the resort that's being renovated. They spot DH but I am trying to sidetrack them. I guess they assume he is peeing or something.

Incredibly embarrasing and kind of fits both #1 and #3. Not something I'd want my kids (or husband) to do but I suppose when you gotta go.

[RmumR]

#1 - i think 9yrs is more than old enough to hold on for an extra 500m. would have taken just as long to pull the car over and stop as to get to the destination and to the bathroom.

#2 - yuck other people will sit on that seat, and although a towel was used what if some missed it or soaked thru - public train seats are yuck enough without adding pee to the situation. train toilets are gross yes but the parent could have held the child so she was hovering over the toilet seat not actually touching it.

#3 the world is not a toilet and no little boy or girl should be taught this. who wants pee all over god knows what.

Sure i would pull over for my DD to wee if we were on a long trip and there wasn't a toilet nearby. if she needed to do #2 i would make sure she was not exposed to other people driving past - would try to do this for wee's too.

[sandy_1902]

if we were far away from the next stop that would have a toliet i would let him do number two's on the side of the road..

if it was about 20 mins no.. unless he had the runs.

the toliet thing.. most have toliets.. i put DS on the toliet before most train trips so i dont have this problem

and he knows you do toliets on toliets only and hes two

[Nowhere]

I take DDs potty with her everywhere we go, to me toilet training is toilet training if you are training for something you train all the time. We tr and encourage her to hold it til we get to where we are going and then she can go too the poty when we get there, she has only had one accident in the car and that was cause she fell asleep.

if she needs to wee I pull over and put her n the poty in the boot of the car ( its a open boot lol not dangerous)

[Lily of the Nile]

I remember when I was younger and being on a picnic or out somwhere and instead of walking me to a toilet they would make me squat in the bushes for convenience even with people watching. I remember feeling very self consious and embaressed and this memory is as young a 3 or 4. So no if I wouldn't do it, then my kids won't do it. And if there's absolutely no way of getting to a toilet, it will be in the quitest place with no people around.

[~BEXTER~]

Story 1 : little girl 9 yrs, parents pull over to let dd go to the toilet on side of the road. They had been in the car under and hour and was less than 500 meters from the planed pit stop at mcdonalds. It was obvious to the car in front that was travelling with them that DD was doing number 2.


I would think at 9 the girl could waited to get to maccas Keiara is 4 and if there is no where to stop, such as a petrol station she can hold it

Story 2 : girl 3.5yrs. Riding on train home. Been on train for 30 mintues when she needed to do a wee. Adult with her put a towel on the train seat, sat girl on and let her go directly onto the towel

I would never let my child do this.
i would get off take her to the toilet and get back on again. How disgusting.

story 3 : talking about toileting with mum if boy 3.2yrs and she says "I let him go every where he wants, it's the best thing about having ds, I tell him the world is his toilet"

I have never understood this.
If I have a boy he will have to use the toilet like my daughter does.

What would you do in each situation?


My replies are in blue