willl not stay in bed

[k&Hmum]

I just wondered if anyone has any tips on how to get my 16 month old daughter to stay in bed when i put her there. She only last month started sleeping through the night because we put her into a bed. she hated the cot. Now she gets up after i put her to bed and when i put her back there she cries and i end up having to lay with her till she falls asleep the creep out without waking. Now she has again started waking during the night and i have to lay with her several times. she barely gets any sleep, gets up early and will not nap through the day. she is so tired she cries all day over little things and its becoming very difficult to handle.
Any tips would be appreciated.

Thanks, Tracey

[mamafelix]

Hi Tracey..

just wondering if your daughters bed is in your bedroom? If not maybe this might help? Even if you just put a small mattrass next to your bed? or you could have her in with you at night.
We've always co-slept with Felix and it has made night times so much easier- he's happy because we're right next to him, so if he wakes he goes straight back to sleep. Currently we're sharing a queen size bed, but as he gets bigger we'll probably pull up a mattrass next to our bed and make a transition to his own space (when he's ready).

I know it's not for everyone, but even if she's in your room you might be able to reassure her-lean over and pat her back till she settles again- without having to get up and out of bed.

Good luck with it! I'm sure she'll settle down to a good nights sleep soon anyway.

[Miss_Vicki]

i found my little girl used to do that alot when she was about 2 till now still tryin to do it, I found themore i slept with her or she slept in my bed the more she want to continue with it , Do u lady have sex lives? sorry if that a bit blunt i think a Night lite an a bit of tuff love will work over time, just be patience an dont give in
my girl is 4 in dec an i surely dont want her still three 1 yr later, Occionaly ill let her on weekend But as soon as i go to bed she go to hers
I found music helps out or the tv on , But now she has her toy hose It is so huge it can barely fit on the bed

[Lily]

I agree with the "tough love" approach too, My youngest which is Jacob was a shocker at bed time, However I persisted with him and now he is 18 months old and isn't intersted in our bed at all, I found going through the motions and always keeping the end result in my mind is what helped me get through it, it was painful for a while as we went through a few sleepless nights, but soon Jacob realised that we weren't giving in and he had to be a big boy and sleep in his room. He would cry and scream, I would go back in and pacify him etc etc.... and now he is better than his 3 year old brother and loves his bedroom to be pitch black... whereas Ethan needs his door open... I don't think kids need to be in our rooms as well...... don't we suffer enough??? :eek: LOL

[mamafelix]

Well, personally I much prefer sleeping with my bub, we all get a better nights sleep that way- he's never cried at night unless he's been in pain or had a nightmare. Ever since he was born he's only had to grunt and I was there with a boob for him to have a feed and go back to sleep. I never have to get up in the night either (I usually breastfeed lying down) which has been a godsend (especially on those noghts when he was small and fed all the time!).

Plus its so nice, frankly, to be able to snuggle up with a sweet baby on one side and a warm hubby on the other. We all feel very connected and safe. Now that he's bigger, Felix just gets up in the morning and starts playing with his cars or whatever on the floor of our bedroom.. which is great- we can have a little nap too.

As for sex... well surely there are more places for it than the bed your bub happens to be sleeping in?? I have been fortunate enough to have an even better sex life after giving birth than before... so its all possible.

Sure, as I've said before- It's not for everyone- and not all babies like to co-sleep, some much prefer their own cots. But it's a viable option- and I wouldn't knock it if you haven't tried it. ;)

[mandymum]

Hi Everyone,

My name is Amanda, i have a 2 year old and a 4 month old, and i also problems with bed time, it has only just started the last few weeks, previously my son went to his bed with pooh bear at 7.00 and would sleep to the next day , but now i am lucky if he is in bed by midnight, i put him in he comes straight back out, and this goes all night, i have tried music, toys in his bed. HELP PLEASE tired mum.

Does anyone know with 4 month old if they also start getting unsettled at a certain point, my son was always unsettled as a new born. My 4 month old daughter was also sleeping right through the night until recently, and i am not sure if it is a stage or if she is not getting enough from the breast milk.

I have had a horrible few weeks, my son goes to bed at midnight and my daughter is up at 1,2,3,4,5, and then up for the day,

Please some advise ! very tired

Amanda

[Angel]

My advice to everyone is to read Elizabeth Pantley's The No Cry Sleep Solution. It is full of ideas for newborns upto children around two years old, and covers the range of situations that arise with those age groups.

I agree with Mamfelix too. For the best part of three years our DD has slept in our bedroom if not our bed. There is plenty of evidence that children naturally grow out of co-sleeping between 2.5-3.5yrs as they develop their own need for independence. Frankly, that says a lot to me about the way that humans were meant to nuture their young, and when I say 'meant' I mean as far as nature is concerned. I have a lot of faith in (and have a had a lot of success with) the methods that encourage a strong attachment in the early years which leads to independence with self-confidence later on.

I'd also suggest reading www.askdrsears.com for lots of tips on sleeping issues. I think there's a FAQ page there too.