View Full Version : New here - RIP Blake Michael
Im new here. I gave birth to my son on tuesday night and he was stillborn. I was just over 26 weeks pregnant.
If you would like to read my story its in the Grief and Bereavement section under loss of a child.
I dont know what to do with myself. I just feel numb and empty inside. I havent buried Blake yet. That is being organised atm and will probably be at the end of the week.
I really just dont know what to say.. I have alot of family support but dont know what to say to them or how to act around them.
I guess im looking for someone who has gone through the same thing to talk to.
RIP my beautiful boy Blake :angel: xoxox I love you so much and miss you so much xoxox
Hi there :wave: i'm so sorry to hear of your loss :hugs: no words will probably help right now, but just know your not alone in how your feeling right now :hugs:
I lossed my first boy comming up 7 years ago now, and the pain of loosing him still hurts now, its just easier to deal with, and when I lost DS3, the feelings and pain from loosing DS1 all came flooding back, and now reading of your loss brings back memories
my only one advice I have for you, is don't keep your feelings in, express how you feel and greve they way you want to, there is nothing that is expected of you, no rules, or ways that your supose to do things, take each day as it comes
the one thing that helped me get through my pain and heartache, was talking to others that had been through the same thing, loosing a child, wether is be still birth or SIDS, MSN became my saviour and a few websites that I could chat on
If you ever wanna chat, feel free to PM me, i've always got a ear to listen and a shoulder to cry on
be strong :hugs::hugs:
RIP Blake :angel:
I'm so sorry for your loss :hugs:
RIP Blake :angel:
I'm so so sorry for your loss. :(
It's just not fair that these things should happen to anyone, and you'll probably spend a long time wondering 'why me?' and there's usually no answer as to why it was you. I've spent a long time wondering 'if I had done this or that' what would be different? But while there are often reasons why these things 'happen' there's never any reason as to why these things happen to US if you know what i mean? Sometimes life just doesn't make any sense and this is one of those moments.
I lost my son at 19 weeks, we found out at our scan that he had died and I had no idea. I was induced and gave birth to him also, and I really believe it is one of the worst feelings being in labour and knowing that your child won't be born crying. :crying: I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy but then I'm also really glad we had the time with him to say goodbye.
There are many beautiful ways to remember your little boy. Even though it all hurts so much at the moment, with a little bit of time that will ease a bit. I can't say in my case that it has ever stopped hurting but it's definitely easier to cope with as time passes. I can talk about him now without crying and wonder what he would be like today.
Did you get some pictures and/or other mementos? I read in your journal that you were sent some teddies from the TLC which is wonderful, although they don't operate in the hospital I went to I have since discovered the organisation and this year on Ethan's first 'birthday' we sent a teddy off to them and hope to every year. We also buy a rainbow themed Xmas decoration for the tree every year.
I just read your story and your loss diary and wanted to say that you have chosen a beautiful song for your sons funeral. We also used Smallest Wingless for our sons memorial and to this day I can't listen to it without crying, but it is beautiful and very fitting.
Also just wanted to let you know that you can also post in the general m/c section if you would like as there are often more people in there etc. I have made the most wonderful, supportive friends through this part of BH. It's awful that we met in such a way but (besides my husband) they are the people who really got me through this and it really does help to talk to others who have lost bubs, whether it be at 8wks, 19wks, 26 wks or even full term. A small group of us experienced our losses at various gestations last year and then all went through the rollercoaster of TTC and 'the next' pregnancy and all the scary things it brought with it. I know you probably haven't given any of that a thought yet but there's a big support network here for you if and when you do decide it is time.
Anyway, hope I haven't rambled too much, I just wanted to touch base and send you some of these. :hugs: Try to rest as much as you can the next few weeks. Do you have a lot of family support? :hugs:
I'm am very sorry for your pain and loss.
RIP baby Blake.
I am so sorry for your loss hun xxx :hugs::hugs:
I am so sorry to read your story.:(
No words I type will take the pain away of loosing your baby boy....
But please know that there are always lots of people here that you can count on for support.
The sun will shine again for you my sweet
I am so sorry to hear this, there is nothing I can say that will take away any of the pain :(
RIP Blake :angel:
I'm sorry for your loss :hugs:
I am so sorry for your loss. I don't know what to say or what to offer in the way of comfort. I just couldnt not reply to the post. You are in my prayers. :hugs:
I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your baby boy Blake :angel:
I don't have any first hand advice on losing a baby but I have experienced grief. I wouldn't worry about what to say or do around your family - just do whatever you feel like at the time. Some days you'll want to talk and other days you may wish to say nothing at all. Then of course some days you may want to scream, shout, cry etc. There's no right or wrong way to grieve. I'm glad your family are very supportive, and they are probably worrying about what to say to you as well.
Perhaps when you feel up to it, you could join a support group or get some conselling? Make sure you get plenty of rest and be kind to yourself.
Thinking of you :hugs:
:hugs::hugs: so so sorry for your loss, RIP baby blake :angel:
I am so sorry to hear about your baby boy- Blake Michael.
I think you've been given some great advice so far by other mum's on BH who have experienced the same pain.
I totally understand the feeling of wanting to 'connect' with someone who has been through the same thing and will understand. I still feel like that.
I noticed you live in WA. I do too- SOR. I haven't really found any support kind of groups where i live...but i will keep looking. Feel free to PM if you'd like chat.
Be kind to yourself over the next little while...and talk to people who are willing to listen and be supportive.
Let us know when you arrange the funeral/memorial so i can be thinking of you that day.
I am so very sorry for you loss.
I lost my baby girl, Layna Belle at 24 weeks on the 14/09/2007.
I know you will hear this from alot of other people but i want to let you know that the pain you are feeling right know will fade. You will always grieve for you little Blake, i shed tears every now and then. But it will become easyer to cope with it.
If you ever need anyone to talk to feel free to contact me. And its ok to cry, dont feel like you have to be strong.
Wishing you and your family all the best during this hard time.
I am so sorry to read your post - my heart goes out to you.
I have just read your pregnancy diary and i just want to say that you are a beautiful mummy.
I hope you find support & comfort on here with women who have had a similar experience.
Thank you ladies for all your kind and supportive words.
Blake will be buried this Saturday ( 2 days from now) at 10am Perth, WA time. Im really not looking forward to burying my son.
I do however, want to know how you ladies coped with getting pregnant again. I want to have another baby soonish but i know that i will stress throught the whole pregnancy wondering every minute if the next bub is going to die too... I pray everynight that next time, i will get to have a full term baby that lives... I dont understand why i had to go through this.
So sorry for your loss. No words can make it better so here is a big hug:hugs:
RIP little Blake:baby:
hi i am so sorry for your loss having experienced similar myself I know that it can be hard to get the support you need
i hope you do not mind I did a little research for help in WA of course did not talk about any of your personal details
Bonnie Babes have support and people available to talk to if you need it their contact number is 1300 266 643
My thoughts and prayers were with you and your family on saturday.
Buring my daughter was one of the hardest things i have ever done.
I have just had my son, he is 18 weeks. I was a nervous wreak during my pregnancy. I found it helped me to make goal weeks. For example.. When i got to 26 weeks i could by one outfit. So instead on focusing on losing him i was focusing on what to get him. Then when i get to 32 weeks i bought the cot. And so on. After the 24th week when i lost my daughter was the hardest but once i was clearly through it, 28 weeks, i was alot better. I also had to get my cervix stitched up. Ask you gyn about it you may be able to do the same thing it helped alot.
Good luck and best wishes through this hard time :hugs:
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