Help Please - Establishing routines

[V8]

Hi, has anyone got any information on what a 9 month old baby should be doing, i have no routine and am really getting to the point where i think it's necessary. I have just been 'going with the flow' for the last 9 months and it doesn't seem to be working. Anytime i think he is in his own routine, something happens and we are all out of whack.

If someone can help with this and please spell it out for me, i feel really at a loss as to what to do and feel quite useless and incompetent. I have no idea how much he should be eating, how much he should be sleeping etc etc...

I was hoping someone could write specifically a day like (for example):

Morning - Wake up, breastfeed, breakfast, up time 2 hours, sleep 1 hour

Lunch - Solids (lunch), breastfeed, up time 3 hours, sleep 30mins etc etc.....

I have no idea!!

Any help would be greatly appreciated!! :D

Thanks!

[Mumshmum]

Hi
Check out this websit, www.babybliss.com.au. I had a quick look and it might have what you are looking for.

[V8]

Thank you thank you thank you, you are gem for finding that info, that's exactly what i was after! :D

[Will]

also www.raisingkids.com.au is a good one. It is also government run, so is pretty good.

[Mumshmum]

Thank you thank you thank you, you are gem for finding that info, that's exactly what i was after! :D
You're welcome. I wish I'd had a computer when my girls were tiny.

[pookiesossige]

Those sites look good, but I was also going to recommend you remain flexible in some ways and don't get down on yourself on the days when a routine just doesn't happen... No matter what routine you latch on to, it all changes just when you think you have it right!

Also, you will establish routines yourself by following what your baby is comfortable with and repeating this each day- what's written down in a book wasn't done so with your particular child in mind. You might be following a routine already without even realising it, it just may need tightening up!

Pick your battles- stay firm in some things, as these increase bub's feelings of security as they become an older baby and venture into toddlerhood. For example, things like a regular, predictable, quiet and comforting nighttime/bedtime routine. Other things aren't as important- like the time they have morning tea or the exact time they go down for a nap during the day. These things change depending on activity levels, such as on playgroup days, or during times of decreased appetitie or growth spurts. Keep this in mind when reading set, published routines from books that have been recommended.

I'm sure you are doing a wonderful job and that your son is thriving- because you have met his changing needs throughout his infancy. Well done!

[Mumshmum]

[QUOTE=pookiesossige]Those sites look good, but I was also going to recommend you remain flexible in some ways and don't get down on yourself on the days when a routine just doesn't happen... No matter what routine you latch on to, it all changes just when you think you have it right!

Good advice.
I often found that I would get stressed if I read too many books etc, as our lives are all totally different and one routine may work for one person and not another.
I guess i would just use that information as a guideline, but change it to suit your needs. When things don't go as you've planned, don't worry too much - life is too short.

[V8]

I totally understand that, i don't want to be a stickler for routine, but it would help to establish some sort of regularity in our day. Those sites have been very informative, i just can't believe how much info there is on the net, you just gotta know where to look for it ;) Thanks very much! :D

[pookiesossige]

Oh yes, life as a bub flees fast from our lives... and hindsight with the first often leads us to make choices with our subsequent babies that can involve being more relaxed about certain things anyway. And more content to do so!



By the way, I've really enjoyed that Raising Children Network site that was recommended before. Some great stuff about building your child's self-confidence ect for when they are older, I've had a great read over the last half an hour or so.

[V8]

Oh yes, life as a bub flees fast from our lives... and hindsight with the first often leads us to make choices with our subsequent babies that can involve being more relaxed about certain things anyway. And more content to do so!



By the way, I've really enjoyed that Raising Children Network site that was recommended before. Some great stuff about building your child's self-confidence ect for when they are older, I've had a great read over the last half an hour or so.

Yeah that website looks really good especially for the older child too. :D

Also i think half my problem sometimes was being too relaxed with parenting and very much was 'against' routine and just wanting to 'go with the flow' but i can now see the benefits of a little more structure to our days, I hope it makes DS a lot more settled at night and a bit easier to deal with. :D I think it's true about hindsight, and you learn as you go with parenting that's for sure, by the time we have our fourth child i think i'll know what i'm doing! haha!

[Lauz]

Going by some of the 9 months olds I care for... they have bottles... but their routine goes a little like this...

6-7am up, nappy change, some bottle
8am creche for breakfast (half a weetbix and rice cereal with formula) & water to drink
8-9.30 play
9.30am fruit snack
play
10am nappy change, bed
11-11.30 wake
11.00-11.30 nappy change (15 mins after wake unless poo) and lunch (bowl) some bottle if desired by child (only has 1 bottle during day)
play
2-2.30... 2 quarters of sandwich, nappy change and bed
3-3.30 wake, nappy change some bottle if some left
4.00 bowl of veggies (sometimes some meat in it)
play
6.00 home
7.00 dinner (depending on how much had at creche)
7.30 bath, nappy, bed


This all depends on the child... e.g. sleep times in general go back or forth and hour... activity of child makes this go back and forth.. when a child is conserving energy to crawl/walk their sleeps become longer/more important... hope this helps!

[SassyMummy]

My DD has a routine (though it's not exactly to-the-clock...it can be slightly adjusted), and has had the same routine for a while (probably since about 7 months...she's now ALMOST 12 months).

*Just note that we get up early and go to bed early because DP is in the hospitality industry and by being late-starters, we get to spend more time with him...so adjust the times for your own situation.*

She gets up whenever she wants...(and then I get out of bed too...I'm lazy). It's usually about 10.30am...and has a bottle immediately.

1 or 1.30: Meal and drink

2 or 2.30: Nap for about 2 hours

4 or 4.30: Meal and drink

7 or 7.30: Meal and Drink

10pm: Bedtime

She gets little snacks here and there...but that's just if she seems to want one. She sometimes has catnaps too...but not often. I don't schedule them...they just happen. Playing or whatever goes in between feeding and such...I just do whatever makes her happy at the time.

I find that feeding and napping to a schedule makes things a lot easier for me...I can plan my day around it...

If you want ot find your own schedule, perhaps record your babies activities for a few days...and then notice if a pattern occurs (like if your baby wants to feed a few hours after waking up each day or whatever). YOu can then make your own schedule from that info.

[li'l mac]

Hi there,
I used to be the same, just following bubs lead WRT sleeps and feeds etc. At about 6 months, things started to settle into more of a routine naturally so I kind of began encouraging it more. I used to wait until DS showed tired signs to put him to bed but I started putting him to bed at around the same time each nap and found he settled straight away. I know what you mean about wanting some kind of schedule, it's nice to be able to predict a bit about what's going to happen in the day! Here's a run down for my bub, as he is almost the same age as yours:

7am wake up. bottle straight away. breakfast (farax and toast) 45mins-1 hour later

9-930 bed. sleep for about an hour

12 Lunch (veg etc). Followed by a bottle at around 1.

1-1.30 Bed. Sleep for an hour to an hour and half.

5pm Dinner. Veg, meat sometimes, pasta, whatever!

6-6.30 Bath

6.30-6.45 Bottle and straight to bed.

If he's looking for something, I offer fruit/cheese/biscuit mid morning or mid afternoon. My DS is a great eater and would probably eat as long as I offered it!

I'm not strict with these times, but it might give you an idea of what's possible. As other people said, each bub will be different but there's nothing like getting a few handy hints from a few sources to make your own decisions! I find it's really helpful to have a routine when planning appointments or catching up with friends, as I can work around sleep times where possible. I hope this is useful for you and your bub. Good luck!

[SassyMummy]

I forgot to add in my post that DD has a bottle at 10pm and THEN bed...not just bed.

[nkenward]

Hi there,

I am not a stickly for routine as i have found as soon as you settle for one - something comes along and changes it. I have just found that if you try and settle for a basic routine and allow for changes then it gives a good foundation for your baby.

The only set routine we have had for Connor is bedtime - we have had the same routine each night and he is in bed from about 7-7.30pm.

Sleep during the day has always been difficult, as sometimes we are out, or he is teething and we have had a cold too. But I figure I am not going to force him to sleep at set times, because it will only make me frustrated and upset if he doesn't follow through. I just work around it and he lets me know when he is tired.

We have 3 main meals a day & 2 snacks + 3 bottles. These are set out during the day - but I don't say b/w 7-7.30am is breakfast, I allow say 2 hours 7-9 to have breaky - otherwise he doesn't eat it all and gets stroppy.

You have to be flexible, depending of course on how you & your family operate. Because all of sudden they can change and you get a huge shock cause you don't expect it.

[Karstens Mum]

Hi Proud Mumma,

Like Emma has said Routine is not always gonna work and being flexible is a good thing.
My lil one is 9 mths end of this week and we kinda follow a routine but not strictly.

I have just managed to get him to sleep all night within the last week and have cut out his last feed at 10pm. So far so good.

Our day goes something like this.
6.30am - Wake Up, Bottle 250ml but doesnt normally drink it all.
7.30am - He cant keep his eyes open most days and goes back to sleep.
Other days he is full of beans and will stay up for 2hrs.
If he stays up he gets some cereal (baby cereal) and a piece of toast which most of it ends up on the floor.
11.00am - Mid morning sleep - Only 30mins if lucky.
12.30anm - Lunch, solids first, lots of finger food at the min and he loves custard.
1.00pm - Bottle 200ml
3-4pm - Afternoon sleep - again 30 mins at most.
5.30pm - Starving and wants his dinner, vegies, meat
6-6.30pm - bath time
7.00pm - Bottle 250ml and bed.

Like I said it doesnt work that way all the time. Just yesterday lil bugger stayed up from 8.00am to 5.00pm, LOL
I am sure you are doing just great though without a routine, as long as baby is happy thats the main thing really.