So, so confused???

[Wookie1]

DS and I have happily been plodding along, putting each other into a reasonable routine. He has been generally a good sleeper and coped fairly well when we've gone out, he has never demanded food so is feed roughly ever 3 1/2 hours (FF).

I understand they change but he is waking earlier and earlier, sleeping much less during the day but he doesn't want to be feed when he wakes, so is up for hours.

Maybe it's just me that can't cope with the changes (I have trouble with giving up control, I am getting help for this) but I've never really had to resettle, so not sure how, all I want is for him to get more sleep.

I'm questioning myself about the changes - what have I done that is different?? - how can I fix it?? The feed, play, sleep cycle is all out of whack.

The only change we have had recently is we have moved into a sleeping bag but I don't think this is the problem as he is still doing long stretches at night.

Anyway, I'm not sure what I asking or whether I just need to share my frustration.

Thanks for reading. :confused:

[TripleTime]

He sounds like Aleah. Now she can move, which i am quite impressed about. She's all over the shop. Ive kept her feeds the same but she sleeps for about 3 hours during the, 4 if im lucky.She does sleep all night & wakes once for a feed.

[~BEXTER~]

Have you tried a wrap and dummy?

Maybe try leaving him when he wakes and see if he will self settle?

They do go through stages of waking different I know when Keiara changed I didn't handle it to well.

Maybe try putting him in bed with you in the morning and he may go back to sleep?

Maybe don't use the bag maybe he just doesn't like it?

[CheekyChicken]

Sounds just like my DD. At around 4 months it is usual for sleeping to change- my DD stopped sleeping through at 3 months (this normally happens according to books at 4 months). She also went through a rough period with her sleep at 4 months and now again at 5 months. I believe these are due to her teething (IMO though doc also said she was teething at her 4 month vax). Also they grow alot/growth spurts and reaching milestones eg rolling over and gaining mobility can throw out all of their old routines. Just hang in there and go with the flow!

[kar]

How early is he waking and how little sleep during the day?

If he is sleeping for 1hr+ at a stint during the day I wouldn't be worrying. Not all babies do the feed/play/sleep thing or at least it may change back and forth a bit at different times. My boy had 4 sleeps a day for ages due to early rising and short sleeping. Its annoying I know.

[Aries7]

My DD went through similar thing. Do an online search or google "4 month sleep regression" & you'll find it's pretty common.

[em1984]

yep 4 months was a turn around for us too....noah went from having a really nice routine, sleeping all night etc to waking every couple of hours at night and only sleeping in 30-40 minutes stretches during the day...everything went completely out of whack and it was really frustrating! I think its one of those things you need to ride out, its too hard to try and change them and exhausting trying to figure out what you have/havent/can do. There is so much going on for them, I found it helpful to think of it from their perspective. Their brains are working in overdrive, the world is confusing and probably quite scary for them. I seriously spent months that felt like all I was doing all day was trying to get noah to sleep, and I look back and just think I wasted so much time and energy when I should have just been enjoying him more. I'm a bit of a control freak, and completely losing control was a fairly major source of anxiety for me, but I know for next time and I have learnt a lot from it all. Noah is MUCH better now, he has one or two long sleeps a day and sleeps pretty well at night so it does get better, they do eventually get back into a rythm. Its just riding this time out and supporting them and making them feel safe and secure that is important. They also pick up on your anxiety so I feel its really worthwhile just relaxing a bit and going with the flow.

[Wookie1]

How early is he waking and how little sleep during the day?

If he is sleeping for 1hr+ at a stint during the day I wouldn't be worrying. Not all babies do the feed/play/sleep thing or at least it may change back and forth a bit at different times. My boy had 4 sleeps a day for ages due to early rising and short sleeping. Its annoying I know.

I'm not really sure how early he is waking as he lies awake in the cot. He has started making noises from 6am (which isn't too bad) but was sleeping till 7am. Day sleeps are 3 of between 40min - 1hr but I was having to wake him until now. (again not too bad but it has all hapeened at once)

I know I need to relax and go with the flow, its just hard.

Thanks for your support and advice.

[kar]

Pfft, telling people like us to relax and go with the flow is pointless :rolleyes:

IF he is happy in his cot I would leave him. He might start taking himself back to sleep for a little nap (mine has just started to at 8mths) I feed him when he wakes around 5 then back in the cot. SOmetimes he sleeps sometimes he sings songs, talks whatever but I have decided I am not getting up for play time until 6 and luckily for us he seems cool with that (for now!)

I found F's sleeping really settled a lot at around 6mths. Was a shocker up til then.

PS - Em I just saw your post and entirely agree int theory, jsut can never quite manage it myself!!

[em1984]

ha you and me both, I read over that again and went jeez I really need to take my own advice haha. It is really hard, I feel like I've just come out the other end of a few really shocker months so its easier to say that now, its more that I look back and think far out I really needed to relax a bit more. Noah's sleep was controlling my life and just consumed my thoughts for so long, and now I just go WHY did I do that to myself! But hey, maybe we wouldnt be in a better place now if I hadn't I dunno?!
wookie have you tried going for an early morning walk in the pram? I also agree to let him play in his cot for a while, I still do that every morning with noah. If he is happy their, leave him, and have a little lie in yourself. I have heard somewhere that they have that deep sleep before 12pm and night, then they go into a light sleep until early morning and this is when they should go BACK into a deep sleep until they wake for the day. It could be possible he is struggling to get back into that deep sleep, so he may need some assistance. I would honestly try the walk in the pram, or even just trying to settle him in his cot. Patting their bum works well, or rocking him to sleep. A drive in the car always works for us too. I read a great book, babybliss, its all gentle sleep approaches and also talks a lot about sleep patterns for different ages. I have found it really really valuable!

[Lateralus]

Hi Wookie... I hate to say it, but my DD is almost 9 months and her sleeping patterns still change on a weekly basis... There always seems to be something that upsets the apple cart - whether it's teething, the heat, wind pains from something she's eaten etc. Could it be your little one is waking earlier in the morning because it's getting light earlier as we move towards summer?

I agree with whoever suggested leaving him in his cot 'till he actually starts crying... I used to rush in as soon as I heard DD awake thinking if I got to her before she started crying that I'd have more of a chance of getting her re-settled (but she rarely resettled if I had come into the room). Now I find if I leave her - sometimes she will self settle, and if she doesn't - I haven't lost anything and maybe got another 15-20 minutes dozing in myself. I also turned off the baby monitor so I wasn't woken by every little noise she made... that I would only actually wake up when she was yelling...

We ended up taking DD to sleep school because her sleeping used to be SO bad... they said during the day, to leave them in their cots for a minimum of 1 hour for day sleeps - even if they aren't asleep that whole time... It gives them time out with minimal stimulation which is what's important for their brain development! If they wake and are upset within that hour... go in and keep resettling them every few minutes until they fall asleep or until the hour is up... then try again next time they start displaying their tired signs... This worked for us and now (most days) DD sleeps reasonably well during the day (when she's not teething, or hot, or windy or..... ;))

[em1984]

oh yeh what katejo said! :D Have you tried making his room darker?? I'm off to spotlight today to get some balckout fabric to do just this, I also just discovered yesterday he actually has an outside blind on his window (yeh I know duh, how did i not discover this months ago?!) which has helped a bit.

[kar]

Babybliss fan here too. I still refer to it quite often. Em I look back on the first 5 mths or so and think the exact same thing - why didn't i just relax. Easy to say now when I can count on him having at least one decent sleep a day and he doesn't scream all afternoon if he doesn't get a good sleep.

When we went to day stay settling school they said the same thing about leaving him in the cot - it is timeout if they are calm and quiet even if they don't have their eyes closed the whole time.

[Nemmy]

I know exactly how you're feeling Wookie. My DD (now 14 weeks) was, up until about a week ago, quite happily sleeping through the night and I was enjoying the feeling of not getting up in the morning like a zombie. But that's changed and now he's waking anywhere between 2am-4am and though I try other methods the only thing that usually gets her back to sleep is a feed. Also, she used to wake in the morning about 6.30am/7am, but the last few days has been waking at 5.30am (yuk!). She doesn't cry just babbles and squeals to herself in her cot. This morning I was so tired that I thought I'd just leave her for 15 minutes because she seemed happy enough and soon enough all was quiet and she was back to sleep. I was in shock but quite happy to roll over and enjoy another hour of sleep:yelclap: yep, sometimes you just have to go with the flow, which is also hard for me as I'm quite a 'list' person who likes routine and structure in life. unfortunately babies don't think the same way as me!:laughing:

[Wookie1]

Thanks everyone, I know my woes aren't as dreadful as some. It's more my approach and expectations that are creating the issues.

Today, has almost mirrored yesterday - but I mustn't tell myself that this is the new structure otherwise the confusion will begin again.

I'm trying - thanks again!!!