16 mnth old climbing out of cot!!

[LAMmum]

Hi everyone,

Just wondering if anyone has had this problem. I'm having alot of trouble resettling 16 mnth old DS. He stopped self settling at 7 months when he started crawling & I have had to wrap & rock him to sleep ever since. 1 month ago he got sick for the 1st time and started refusing to be wrapped. I still have to rock him to sleep & most of the time it takes an hour to get him down. Lately if he wakes & needs to be resettled he wants to be rocked in my arms & every time I go to put him back in the cot he screams.

Last night he had me up for 1 & a half hours @ 4am. After trying for an hour to get him back in the cot I gave up and left him in the cot screaming. I just had to leave the room. After about 5 minutes of him screaming I heard a thud. I thought he was banging his legs against the side of the cot but to my shock & horror he came toddling down the corridor weeping & looking for me . Somehow he got out of the cot!!!!:confused: I couldn't believe it!!!!

He was physically ok considering that it's a 3-4 foot drop but I still can't work out how he managed it. Has this happened to anyone else? I feel like such a bad mother for him being distressed to the point that he threw himself out of the cot!!!! I rang the parent help line & they told me to convert the cot to a toddler bed or put a mattress on the floor as he will continue to climb out. I think he's too young not to be in a cot and I have now made some modifications to the cot so he can't get out of it (too hard to explain how...this post is getting too long as it is). I would appreciate any comments from anyone who has had similar problems.

[Seacretsquirrel]

I think that you have to weigh up the "too young to be out of a cot" with the risk of him hurting himself climbing out. My DD was in a single bed at 13 months and we never had any problems (though she didn't realise she could actually get out till about 20 months :D).

You may actually find him being in a big bed might actually help with the settling as you could lie beside him rather than trying to get him into a cot after settling him, and long term sitting beside a bed patting him to sleep will be much easier than trying to do the same in a big bed. He may also sleep better with more room too (I know both mine were better in the cot than the bassinette and DD was better in the bed than cot) I found my 2 are so restless they tend to bash hands and feet etc on the sides which woke them up.

Sorry don't think I have been any help perhaps a sleeping bag might inhibit the climbing (though it may be worse if he did manage to climb over if he didn't have his legs free ????)

Hope some else is more help but in the meantime :hugs:

[Belula]

I think the sleeping bag idea is a good one.:yelclap: Together with the modifications you have made to the cot should keep the little one in the cot. Maybe put a mattress on the floor just in case. I know my DD1 slept better once in the sleeping bag, but I was still rocking/cuddling to sleep. At some point you will have to consider taking the plunge and refusing to rock and cuddle to break the sleep association. We did this around 18 months together with dropping the last BF. DH did the resettling at that point because I just couldn't stick to it. Also we started it on a Friday night that way we had the weekend to recover if the nights were difficult. It is easy to suggest these things I know, but hard to put them in place.

My DD1 also slept well in the big bed when she outgrew her cot. I was able to lie next to her which was more comfortable than sitting by the cot. There are challenges with every new stage of development (ie. being unwrapped, moving to a big bed) and things do sometimes go backwards before they go forwards. You just have to come up with new ways to meet the challenge. It can take a while, but you get there in the end.

[LAMmum]

Thanks girls for the suggestions. I am going to have to think about what to do because even though I thought the modification I made to the cot would work he got out again tonight:banghead:. He wasn't distressed this time as I was just getting him down for the night not resettling. I managed to catch the tail end of his efforts and he was coming out feet first so at least he's not landing on his head. Now I can't bring myself to go to bed because I'm scared he'll wake in the night and just climb out without me knowing. He usually yells out first though so I'll just have to get in there quick.

[Seacretsquirrel]

Yikes little houdini! (this is my fear with DS he is already a bit of a climber at 7 months and he up stairs and over obsticles the cot is to high as yet but I am on the watch for any signs)

Hope you find a solution soon - I have heard that you can get little canopy things that zip up that are supposed to stop them getting out - no idea where you get them from or how expensive they are but it might be an interum though!

[butterfly85]

what about a portacot? would that help, they look harder to climb out of ? if youve got one, or could borrow one for a trial, could be worth a try??? just an idea :)

[LittleBubbles]

what about a portacot? would that help, they look harder to climb out of ? if youve got one, or could borrow one for a trial, could be worth a try??? just an idea :)


I've heard that portable cots are no good for bigger children. Yeah they do look harder to climb, but are easier to tip over. So i've been told anyway...

Have you tried introducing your DS to sleep in your bed? I know a lot of mothers wouldn't agree with this, but it seems you have a very sensitive little boy who loves his mummy too much to go to bed on his own!

Do you use a baby monitor to listen out for him during the night or is your room close? I only ask because if you decide to put a matress on the floor for him to sleep on - you'll need to keep his door closed. I'm guessing that's something he's not used to aswell?

It seems like a very difficult situation. Perhaps if you adopt the matress on the floor idea - you may need to stay in the room with him till he goes to sleep. (easier said than done - I know) Maybe read him a book, sing some lullabies, or put on a light show to watch together... Anything that might settle him down. It sounds like he's experiencing seperation anxiety.

If he's particularly attached to you then maybe your DH should maybe swap routines with you and try getting the little one to sleep?

Not sure if any of this is helpful. I wish you luck though. :thumbsup:

[Seacretsquirrel]

A baby gate might help with keeping him in his room if you do decide a mattress on the floor is a viable option for you - that way he can still hear you and most importantly you can hear him but he is safe if he wakes in the night - he can't go wandering around the house in the dark.

[3'llhavetodo]

Was too lazy to read everything :laughing: but just wanted to mention both of my 2 were on a matress on the floor before they turned 1.

[LAMmum]

Thanks for all the suggestions ladies :). I never thought about a portacot. My parents have one at their house for when he sleeps over but he hasn't slept there since he started climbing out of the cot. I'll keep that idea in mind but I think he might be able to topple it over...he's a strong boy!!

Not tried co sleeping but knowing my little one I don't think it would work. To be honest I don't really want him getting in the habit of being in our bed. My DH is 6 foot 4 and 105kg so bubs would get squashed :laughing:

Our room is close so I don't need a monitor to hear him & I do have a spare baby gate so that could be an idea if I end up using a mattress or converting the cot to a toddler bed.

I have modified the cot again and actually watched him trying to climb out & he couldn't get his long legs over the side so I think I'm ok for the moment. I think the trick with him is to somehow teach him that it's ok to go to sleep (he has fought sleep his whole life :hair:) & gradually try to settle him in the cot instead of in my arms. I think that may help with the separation anxiety.

Thanks for all your help :)

[~BEXTER~]

Haven't read replies but i think its time for a bed with a rail. Climbing out of the cot can't be good and now he knows he can do it I think he will keep doing it.

As for still being rocked to sleep. I think you need to stop it.

Put him to bed say goodnight and walk out.
When he cries lay him down and tuck him in, DO NOT SAY ANYTHING TO HIM and walk out again.

Keep doing this until he goes to sleep.

First few weeks will take ages and you will fell like giving in, Don't this is what all those people do who come into your home to help settle your baby.

[LAMmum]

Ok. Little Houdini is still getting out so cot has been converted to a toddler bed and I have attached a side guard so he can't roll out. He can climb out easily when awake so he's not going to hurt himself & I have put a gate on the doorway so he can't get out of the room in the middle of the night. Still have to work on the 'rocking to sleep' issue. If he is REALLY tired he will fall asleep in the car (that's only happened recently!!) or with only a few minutes of being held & then it's easy to just put him in the cot. I don't know if I'm trying to get him into bed too soon.:confused: His routine is roughly up at 7:30 - 8am, daytime nap between 1:30 - 3:30pm (after 30 mins of rocking) & then the 1 - 1.5 hours of trying to settling starts roughly at 8:30 - 9pm. Anyway :ecomcity::ecomcity: will see how we go tonight.

[EquineMum]

This may sound a bit 'over the top' (and I could get flamed for saying it), but anything you are doing to stop him climbing out isn't actually treating the issue as to WHY he's climbing out :no: I think the fact that he's still being rocked to sleep and relies on you so much to settle him is the issue - no wonder he's coming looking for you!:yes:

You've definitely taken the right steps with the toddler bed and the baby gate - safety absolutely needs to come first. I totally agree with the PP who said just keep putting him back to bed, take the 'hard' approach of saying "night night, it's bed time" and then walking back out each time he gets out of bed. This will get so repetitive and frustrating it will probably do your head in (no more so than 1.5hrs of rocking though!), but persistence will win out. He needs to learn to settle himself to sleep and to learn that he can do it without you :yes:

The one thing I say to myself when my DS is going through a patch of something that drives me crackers is 'this too shall pass' - and remind myself that these young years pass in a blur. Soon it will be girlfriends and drink driving you'll be worrying about!! :laughing:

Hopefully your DS settles soon...hang in there!

[Annabella]

My first is a little monkey and started climbing out around age 1, she was still in our room then though, I think we took the side off the cot and put a safety rail up so she wouldn't hurt herself climbing out, she was gonna get out anyway! But we put her in a bed with the safety rail thing in her own room when we moved house just after her 1st b'day, and like PP suggested, put a rail up across the doorway so she couldn't come out when it was bed time.

Sorry to break it to you but I think even if he does learn to settle in his cot, he knows how to climb out now and will probably keep doing it even if its just when he wakes up, but would probably be safer without the side on.

[LAMmum]

Thanks again for replies. EquineMum - you are totally right in regard to the fact that I need to stop rocking him to sleep. I should have nipped this habit in the bud ALONG time ago but I was not in the right frame of mind (I have been suffering from PND & anxiety). I was in the process of trying to do this when he started getting out of the cot. The first night he went into his converted bed he fell asleep in my arms while I was reading him a book in the lounge room - 5 minutes, no rocking - great :yelclap:. 2 hours later he woke up spewing his guts out :barf:. He has had gastro ever since. Last night we had spew & poo everywhere. I can safely say that being projectile vomited on is not one of lifes pleasures :laughing::laughing:. So of course now he is clinging to me like glad wrap. Will wait until he's better to try the whole 'self settling' thing again. Yes, when things get difficult I too try & think 'it will pass, he'll be 18 (or younger!!) before I know it & coming in after a night on the turps & throwing up in the hallway'. He can bl**dy well clean that up himself though :laughing::laughing:.

[ChristyRZ]

Definitely time for a big-boy bed. If you're worried about him falling out in his sleep, you can get one of those baby bed rails (http://babybedrails.net). But that won't keep him from climbing down when he's awake.

I agree that the issue isn't his ability to climb or not, the issue is why is he climbing down. Not to judge, but sounds like maybe the nightly routine needs to change a bit, with him having a bit less control.