how early were your bubs? helping a friend...

[bearsmummy]

Hi my girlfriend is in hospital as of today due to preeclampsia. She is 26 weeks today. The doctors have said it is pretty definite she will have her bubba in the next week or so.

Just wondering how early some of your bubbas were and how they coped being born so early.

I feel so helpless, :confused: she has chosen me to be her support partner as she doesnt really have any other support (father did a runner) as i have had 3 kiddies, but im so clueless about this scenario... can anyone help me with how to help my friend deal with this? :crying:

Just so i know what to expect would be good so i can help her as best as i can.

Thanks:thumbsup:

[Lambie]

Hi bearsmummy,

Preclampsia and toxcemia seem to be a common problem in my family. My niece was born 8 weeks early and I was born 10 weeks early and weighed only 1440gms. This was back in 1975 and my mother was in an induced coma at the time. Medicine has come a long way since this and now hospitals and staff are extremely well equipt to handle these situations.

This will be extremely tough on your friend as her child will need instant medical attention and she will at times find herself helpless over the next few months. All I can say is that you are such a good friend being there for her, and hope you continue to offer support in the coming weeks/months...(you deserve the first cuddle!:hugs: ).

:fingerscrossed: this little miracle is a fighter!!!

[sshellzp]

My girl was born at 26 weeks, she has been out of hospital now for 10 weeks and is doing great. PM me if you would like to talk.
Shell.

[bearsmummy]

thanks so much for all of your help.... just got off the phone to my girlfriend then and it looks like bub will be here within the next 10 days. :fingerscrossed:

[newmum2one]

I had my DS in February this year at 30 weeks due to pre-eclampsia and my son was in the special care nursery for 6 weeks afterwards. Except for jaundice and aneamia (sp?) which have both long since passed, my son is perfectly healthy and thriving. My little cousin, born in May was very premature too (not sure how early) and is thriving. While at the special care nursery I got talking to a couple of mums who had their babies earlier than 30 weeks and their babies as far as I know are also thriving. Your friend is going to need lots of support especially when she goes home from hospital herself and when she comes home to an empty nursery from each hospital visit and a shoulder to cry on. If she needs to talk to someone who has been there done that (or if you want to) then pm me and I can try and help - sometimes it helps just to talk to someone who's been there.

[gidgeroo]

Hi
I had my DS2 at 28 weeks but not due to pre-enclampsia. He was born 1.27kg and around 37cm long. He was in NICU for a couple of days and then in special care for 8 weeks. It was really hard work but the nurses and doctors were fantastic with him and with giving us all the access to him we wanted. The bubs I met in special care who were born after 25 weeks seemed to be doing really well.

He's now 6months old, 6.5kg and doing wonderfully well. He is up to date developmentally for a 4mth old and is totally gorgeous.

Your friend will need your support - in the best case scenario she'll need someone to help pass the time while she waits for her baby to come home. She'll need support with expressing milk and looking after herself too. Please feel free to pm if you want to talk about what she might be going through. :hugs: these help heaps!
cheers
georgia

[FOURtunate]

My beautiful Aimee was born 6 years ago at 26 weeks 4 days. She was 986 grams. She is fine now, at school, goes to dancing, and has lots of friends.

She spent 71 days in hospital, and suffered infections, lung disease, a cerebral haemorrhage, sepsis and more. In winter she normally get pneumonia, and her lungs are still not as mature as they should be. Her kidneys become infected easily. She is anemic. Her fine and gross motor skills are a little affected, and she has a learning difficulty. But we are working on all of this. To the world she looks like a perfect, healthy little girl, apart from her size.

From the outset, she appeared to have no traces of any issues related to her premature arrival until she reached school age. But we keep cheering her on.

I had her baby brother 2 years ago, at 33 weeks. He was 2.1kg, and had no health issues. But then at 4 months old we found that he had torticollis due to lying transverse from 16 weeks (I had Placenta Praevia so he had nowhere to lie but across). His motor skills are affected by this, and due to his low birthweight he gets sick often, has asthma and we found out yesterday that he needs speech therapy.

I hope that this helps. I know it's not a perfect story, but you need the facts. I'd do it all again today if I were again blessed with the same beautiful bubs. Tell your friend that miracles happen. :smiliedance:

[bearsmummy]

thankyou to all who have given me advice on this. :hugs:
i just got home from the hospital and my friend had to be sedated last night to bring down her blood pressure... looks like bub may be here sooner than later.

:fingerscrossed: everything goes fine. his mummy is a fighter so im sure he will be too.

hope your bubs and older kiddies are all doing well, u are all doing such an amazing job:yelclap:

ill keep you all posted on what happens... :D

[bearsmummy]

hi mums, just wanted to thank you all for your support.

beautiful baby Landon was born stillborn yesterday afternoon as my friend renee had suffered a placental abrubtion due to her blood pressure being so high and clots forming behind the placenta:crying:

i was with her from 6am till i knew she was fast asleep at 10 last night. i just sat there holding Landon whilst she was sleeping, he is a beautiful ,perfect little boy. just breaks my heart.

renees blood pressure has improved dramatically and she should be able to come out of ICU tomorrow:fingerscrossed:

off to spend today with her as well, not sure what else to do.... guess thats all i can do......:crying:

thanks again girls.... take care:hugs:

[FOURtunate]

Oh you poor sweetie. It's tough for a friend to go through that. :hugs:

You will need to be so strong for her, for a long time to come. She will need you to just be there. Not necessarily saying anything. Just as a caring presence.

I do love that you held him, and kept him loved and safe while his Mummy gained strength for the tough road ahead. Holding a born sleeping baby is both heartbreaking, and amazing. There really is no way to describe it is there?

Please tell your friend that we are here waiting for her, and look forward to supporting her when she is ready to come and meet us.

With Love,

Michelle (a Mummy to twin stillborn Angels)

[bronny-jane]

:crying: thats so sad, i hope she gets help, and im sure she appreciates what you've done, your a great friend:hugs:

[gidgeroo]

I am so sad to hear that your friend is going through this. :crying: Its so unfair. You are such an amazing friend. I'm so sorry that things turned out so tragic for her. Grieve with her and support her through whats to come - you are truly an amazing friend and she will need you now more than ever.:hugs:
xo Georgia

[bearsmummy]

thanks girls for your support:hugs:
just got home now from being in there all day, im soooo exhausted yet cant sleep.
Renee is a little better today physically(still in ICU though), emotionally is another story... like alot of you suggested we mostly just sat in silence today and hugged.:crying: im off in there tomorrow again.... keep you all posted.

thanks again so much for your support, you have helped me so much.

[little mermaid]

Mel,
I dont know what to say.... but I will say I am so sorry to hear about little Landon and want to give you and Renee all my love. :crying:
She is so lucky to have such a beautiful friend like you to help her through the loss of her little angel and this traumatic time.

Please send my love to her and I hope she is doing as well as can be expected.:hugs:
I hope you are coping ok as I know it is such a hard time for you as well.

[bearsmummy]

hi girls, well id just like to say thankyou for all your support and kind words that helped me get through this with Renee.
Renee got out of hospital last tuesday but still has to go for daily check ups but shes getting better as the days go on.
We say goodbye to baby Landon on tuesday:crying:

well girls once again thankyou so much, i really appreciate it. hopefully ill see you all round the boards chatting bout happier things.

take care, mel:wave: