36 Weeks Pregnant and Experiencing Pre-Natal Depression

[beaver]

Not much to say, just want to vent. XP left me in July, been quite unsupportive, I yearn for him to be part of this to care for me and to love me but no, he picked up with a woman with three children and a criminal record supposedly. Diminished my self-worth even further, sad but I would take him back in a heartbeat. Feel guilty cause I want him back so much and my poor self-worth and low mood has developed into a pre-natal depression, I think. I don't know whether or not I want him or if it is just to fix how I feel about myself but either way, I just wish he would care about me and baby and be here instead of yelling at me and treating me like I'm a really bad person. I don't know, it's all too confusing, thank God I am commencing counselling tomorrow cause I really have no idea what is happening inside of head. . . I feel depressed and at times, have thoughts of suicide that I'd never act on. Be harden the f**k up cause not long and DS will be born and he needs a strong Mama. Thanks for listening or reading etc.

[MumNeedsCoffee]

:hugs:
It's completely understandable the way you feel about XP.
You will be a strong mama but I hope you have lots of people to support you.
Good luck at counselling tomorrow, it helps to be able to pour out all your feelings.
Maybe start an online journal here to keep track of your feelings.
Wishing you all the best for the birth of your son very soon and hope you keep us up to date with how you're doing.

[Dortygirl]

Ohhh beaver :hugs:. It's hard enough to get through pregnancy even with a supportive partner but to have yours run off with someone else is terrible. All I can say is that counselling is the best thing that you can do for you and your bub. I have suffered with depression for the last 3 years and gave up the meds to fall pregnant and I have to admit it has been a bit of a rollercoaster through the pregnancy. I think the meds are great if you need them but my only concern was reading up on Zoloft that they can cause breathing difficulties for bubs when third trimester comes around.

I'd say go get as much counselling as you can and forget your ex as he is not worthy of you and your child. Once that baby arrives (while I know it will be tough) the fact that you will love each other so much will really outweigh anything else. Situational depression passes and even if it is a chemical imbalance then it can be helped. Remember there is light at the end of the tunnel for you with this bub and once they arrive you will feel very differently !!

All the best and keep up the counselling :hugs: