Things they don't tell you when you are having a baby

[Californication]

Hi all,

I was up expressing at 5am and William was making all sorts of noises in his sleep and it got me thinking that there are a lot of things people don't tell you when you are having a baby - like how noisy they are. I'm not talking about the crying, more the unexpected noises. I never knew a baby could be so noisy in their sleep!!! He makes more noise than my DH and dog's snoring combined!

[crazymuma]

They never tell you how much they poo!
They never tell you how hard it is when they are sick!

I think thats all they didn't tell me :D

[RoseKathleen]

Yep! Noisy noisy noisy - snuffles, groans, snores! With my first I jumped up at every sound and raced to the bassinette. I have now learnt to ignore most of the sounds and I am getting so much more sleep!

Another thing they don't tell you is to watch out for explosions - of the poo variety! My advice is never to stand directly behind a baby when you lift their bottom to put the nappy under. The pressure on their tummy can cause a "pooplosion"! I know of a baby who managed to hit the wall on the other side of the room! :laughing:

[MrsDribbleDrawers]

Riley is very quiet (there's nothing in the world that could drown out DH's snoring :laughing:), but it's the poo-splosions that get me... the midwife in hospy reminded me that breastfed bubbas can go up to 9 days without pooing, but it seems that every other nappy is filled!! Neither of the girls filled their nappies quite as much :D

[elleandsam]

They never tell you babies have a two week sleepy honeymoon period!

They never tell you how wriggly they are!

Or how loud they burp lol.

[bingo27]

Everyone always joked about getting use to the pooey nappies, but for me the real killer is the baby spew. There is so much of it, and it smells. My house smells of it, I smell of it and the baby constantly smells of it. People say that you don't mind so much when its your own bub, but I still think its gross!

[sim081005]

There is so much for me but that could be due to the fact I was scared of babies even when preggers but for me it is the fact you have someone constantly wanting your attention & that you need to let go of your old life and accept & imbrace the new.

[sandy_1902]

how loud and stinky there fluffs can be

[Excitednewbie]

Definitely agree with all of those especially the noises they make when asleep and the farting. I can't believe how loud and often C farts and it sounds like an adult fart, not a cute baby one, whatever that is meant to sound like!! With the noises in the night, I agree with RK! I started of getting up at the first noise so I could wheel the bassinet out of the room so DH didn't get woken (work days only!!!) and then found C didn't wake for another 2 hours so I was left sitting/dozing on the sofa waiting instead of curled up comfy in my own bed! Now I have learnt when C is actually waking up so I make my move then.

[SomewhereOverTheRainbow]

They don't tell you that you'll be so exhausted that you fail to notice your bed is covered in a combination of dried breastmilk (from those leaky night times) and dried baby vomit (from those night feeds)...it will still feel like the most comfortable thing in the world! And that you just won't care, you'll sleep in it anyway!
They also don't tell you that for some reason stuff won't fit properly..even though you might be the same weight as before everything seems too short or too tight across the hips. And that sometimes if one boob is really full you'll look really lopsided!
:laughing:

[sharonnscotty]

DITTO alll of the above :yelclap:

Leaky boobs, mastitis, baby vomit, poo explosions (they are my favourite LOL), sheet changes in the middle of the night, clothes changes in the middle of the night, leaky nappies, oh and the grunts and noises,,,, sheeesh there are lots of thoses, i must be really tuckered out, cause now week 2 none of these wierd noises are waking me up. Oh except for the random little giggles last night. :laughing:

[tummy fairy]

:laughing: All the stuff here is so true! I'm listening to Willow whistle thru her nose as I type (so annoying).

Leaky boobs, milk and spew stained sheets....even my dogs won't sleep in my bed anymore.

For me, there isn't enough prewarning of how hard BFing can be! It definitly doesn't come naturally to me. Not as easy as the women with massive nipples make it look in the dodgy 1980's videos that they show at prenatal classes.

And don't get me started on mastitis....ouch

[WTK]

What about boogies? :eek: How can something so BIG come out of something so small ... wait, that can apply to so many things :laughing::laughing:

[Californication]

I must be lucky - I haven't had any poo explosions or leaky boobs (I don't have enough milk, so am supplementing), but I can relate to the huge boogers and loud (and stinky!) farts and burps! Can also relate to the difficulties with BF Tummy Fairy.

William has also started imitating a chicken - he makes this weird noise while I'm burping him that sound just like a chook! It cracks me up every time :)

[Brood Mare]

I was kinda have expecting most of this stuff because I took care of my nephew the first 6 months of his life.
I however never realized how exhausted I would feel at this stage!
The difficulty of not giving in and falling apart and just to stay SANE!
Also the amount of medical and social appointments you have after they are born. I have never been so busy like this in my life.

But the stuff they never told me about having a baby, was half the stuff I experienced during pregnancy.

[MiracleMum21]

They may poop at one end.....but it can find its way up the back to the neck! :eek:
and......
Baby Boners!