Bad Midwifes

[Kamaikia]

Alot of people have got a story about a bad or frustrationg midwife and i'd like to hear them.
I rang the hospital at 11pm when my waters broke only to be told to see what happens, that i'd never had a baby so i was just confused. I ended up going to hospital about 8 hours later. I got an older midwife who hooked me up to the machine to moniter my contractions and the babies heartbeat but the strap kept slipping and it wasn't reading properly. I told her that my waters had broken - she said, and these are her words "no I don't think they have i think you have lost control of her bladder"- I think i would know the difference. At 11am she told me that seeing as though i was still on my feet I should go home. As she hadn't done a internal in all this time my sister who was there put her foot down and told her to do one before we go anywhere. She did it then just walked out of the room. Turns out my waters had broken and i was about 5cm dilated.
I wasn't going anywhere. it wasn't long after that i asked for some pethedine and was told by her to wait half and hour. Exactly half and hour later i asked for it only to be told no it was too late. (this was approx 4 hours before my son was born) so i went through without any pain releif but the gas. (which i was not happy about)
Luckily her shift ended before my son came and i had an amazing women deliver my boy but i couldn't help feeling really angry toward the other midwife for treating me like an idiot.
She made what i felt was a great experience into a real drama because of her "I am the midwife so I know everything" attitude

[madvoice]

When I had my first Glucose Tolerance Test 28wk blood test the midwife rang my husband and told him that there was nothing to worry about. I just needed to take some tablets?? That got my heckles up. I rang back and she told me that I'd FAILED my first test and that my iron levels were really low and I needed to do something about it NOW! No we're a little concerned we want you to do it NOW. I got really angry. I said why couldn't you have told my husband the truth. She said privacy issues. I replied "why did you tell him everything was ok when it wasn't". She got really catty with me and I told her that I wasn't going to put up with it and hung up on her. I made sure that the rest of my midwife apointments WEREN'T with this woman.

Also after Raleigh was born I had very sore/cracked nipples. I was using a nipple sheild and I got YELLED at for using it because it was BAD for my baby. I told her that it was MY choice and to get lost (had this happen with two midwives). They made me sign an indemnity form in order to use a nipple sheild AND a dummy. I couldn't wait to get out of there fast enough. They also got up me for getting up and moving around so soon after my c-section. I got very angry with all of them and told them that it was MY choice to move around and I'm not going to just sit her on meds.

I also had to tell one midwife who was about to give me pethadine for the pain after my c-section to go away because pethadine does absolutely NOTHING for me. Well it does make me tired but the pain doesn't go away. I found 3/4 of the midwives at Darwin Private Hospital to be really horrible. If there is a next time I'm going to be just as difficult to live with LOL :D

[mummycloud]

For some reason the midwives at public hospitals around here don't believe anyone is in labor till the head comes out.
Thats' happened twice to me. I get told I'm not in labor and then end up screaming that the baby is crowning beofre they finally believe me :mad:

I guess that because they have so many women coming in with false labor, they assume that every time is false unless the baby comes out :rolleyes:

[aardvark]

The midwife who looked after me when I was in labour with #1 should have her registration revoked.

I'd been in labour for 3 hours, and I asked how much longer I was likely to be, and she tol me at least another 5 hours. On the basis of how much pain I was in, I determined I could not endure 5 more hours of that, and asked for Pethidine.

It took at least another 30 minutes before the pethidine was given.

My daughter was born approximately 20 minutes after the Pethidine injection, and needed to be resuscitated. Thank god my OB made it to the hospital in time.

The reality was that she had given an opinion as to how long I was going to be based on NOTHING other than it was my first baby, and that it should take about 12 hours. If she'd had a look to see what was going on, (which she didn't), and told me I was in transition, and it would not be much longer, I would have coped fine, and she would have known I was too far along to have the drug in any case.

[Briannabear]

The midwives who looked after me took 28 hours of labour in hospital, and 5 or so internal examinations to work out that my baby was in breech position! :mad:

[BJelly]

I did meet some lovely midwives, but they were few. As my husband said about the ones he met - if they weren't weird, they were mean.

I had a third degree tear and I was told to get up and get my own cold pack by one midwife, and was refused by another. I also had to organise my own discharge medications - I had to be on antibiotics for 5 days and I left on day 3 - I was just about to leave, when I realised I hadn't been given anything for the next 2 days.

I also had to walk to the car park after picking up the discharge medications. No one in the ward offered me a wheelchair, and I didn't think to ask for one, so I shuffled past the nurse in charge of the ward and the doctor. So by the time I got to our car, my insides felt like they were falling out!!

I also got told by the paediatrician on the day of discharge that there was a mix up with my 20 week ultrasound, and when I asked the head nurse to find out what had gone wrong - I was told to fill out a form and she would get back to me in a week!! She also patronisingly said what was the problem - me and baby were fine. I said that wasn't the issue - the issue was that without the correct ultrasound, the obstetrician couldn't have known if my placenta was in the right place - and the fact that baby and me were fine, was more a case of good luck than good medical care.

Also just before we left the ward my husband had brought up the baby capsule and bub didn't look quite right in it. We asked a midwife if she thought bub was positioned correctly - and she said something like - I shouldn't have to tell you, you should already know how to use it! And more or less tsked tsked us for being bad parents because we hadn't used baby capsule before.

ARRGH! I can't tell you how glad I was to leave that place!!

[dee dee]

I met a couple of doozies at my hospital!! My dd was overdue so my ob sent me to the hospital to be hooked up to the monitor just as a precaution to check that everything was ok. The midwife hardly spoke and just made disapproving noises. When I asked her what was wrong, she demanded to know how much I had eaten that day. When I answered her she shot back with "well thats not enough is it?" She left to get me a glass of water and then hooked me up for another half an hour. After an eternity she returned and unhooked me and despite asking if everything was ok she wasn't very forthcoming with the information. I will never forget the words she said to me as I was leaving- "you wouldn't starve your baby when it is out, so why are you doing it now!"

Needless to say, by the time I got home I was in tears. I rang my ob who was disgusted about what had happened, and he rang the hospital immediately. He rang me back shortly afterwards, saying that all was well with the bub and there was nothing to worry about.

To continue with my saga.......
I was due for an induction on a Wednesday night, so hubby and I decided to go out for dinner on Tuesday night. Our 'last supper" so to speak. When we got home we had a message from the hospital asking where we were as they were waiting for us :confused: Well I rang the hospital and told them I wasn't due in until Wednesday and they proceeded to tell me that I was mistaken and to come on in. I mean I have heard of being forgetful in pregnancy but this was something else!!!! Surely I couldn't forget something as important as the date that my first child was due to be born on.
I rang my ob who assured me that I was booked in for Wednesday night, and that he would sort out the drama for me. The midwife then tried to tell the ob that he too had the incorrect date. Well to cut a long story short my ob seems to think that they had overbooked and the midwives were then asked to try an dconvince us that we both had the wrong day.

Like madvoice I too had to sign an indemnity form, but mine was to alow me to give my 'starving' daughter a bottle of formula (as we had alot of trouble breast feeding). I felt so belittled having to sign this form before being allowed to feed my daughter. The midwives mad me feel like I was the worst mother in the world.

But don't get me wrong there were also some life savers, I remember one in particular giving me a huge cuddle when the three day blues hit. She showed me how to express my milk so that dd could get some precious breastmilk but she also offered me formula without making me feel guilty.

Sorry for the ramble, dee dee

[aardvark]

I forgot about the other bad one I encountered when in hospital after having #1.

She was about 24 hours old, and I needed some help with feeding, as you do.....

So I rang the bell for the midwife, and she came down, and when asked about some assistance with feeding, she told me "It's not my place to tell you how to feed your baby".

Probably contributed to me developing mastitis not long after going home.

[pregasaurus]

Man, I hate midwives. When in labour with no.1, I went in with 5 minutely contractions having been in labour already for 19 hours, only to be told the last 19 hours weren't 'real' labour, and that I was only 3 cms and they would count labour beginning from now (oh, ok, so when I was pacing up and down the hall all night I was just pretending then?). I asked if I could please have some Panadol, I didn't want anything stronger. I was told they wouldn't give me panadol, only pethidine. I said 'I don't want any pethidine', she came back with a needle and I said 'I don't want any pethidine', she rolled me over and pulled my dress up, I said 'I don't want any pethidine' and she stabbed me in the leg with the needle and gave me the shot!

After 4 hours of being completely out of it, I came out of the drug haze the pain was unbearable. I asked for a spinal block, which they agreed to. I checked again that I was getting a SPINAL BLOCK and that I WOULD be able to move around and have a shower etc, 'yes, yes, you're getting a spinal block'. As soon as the anaesthetist left she insisted on breaking my waters. After, I asked if I could please get up and have a shower and she turned around and sneered at me 'you're not going anywhere, you've just had an epidural put in' and walked out of the room! My husband had to go hunting through the cupboards to find a towel to soak up the mess, as she hadn't even given me a pad after breaking them, so I was sitting in a massive pool of meconium stained water, unable to move or feel my lower body.

My daughter was posterior and they left me flat on my back (the WORST thing you can do for a posterior woman) for 7 hours.

I was left so traumatised and upset after my first birth I refused to go back to that place to ever have another baby ever again. I wouldn't even send my dog there to have puppies.

[pinkandblue]

Hi

I went through the midwives clinic when I was pregnant and also had a different set of midwives to deliver my baby. I just want to say that every midwife I saw was fantastic! I didnt have a problem with any of them.

Natalie

[jamb]

I'm with pregasaurus- i won't go to back to the birth centre i had bub at, i will go to a delivery ward with OB's on close hand.

I endured 12 hours of full on labour, with 4 hours of pushing that was not moving bub. I was told, no i couldnt have an epi as i was nearly there (12 hrs later i got one from the OB), i had to stay in the bath (i wanted out), i was not pushing properly (despite the fact i was pushing everything out of my bowel) and she kept asking can't you feel the baby and don't you feel like pushing- no and no.

She finally had to go and do her home care duties and the junior MW went and got the OB who said- she is in maternal exhaustion, her contractions are fading and she needs an epi and to be induced- half an hour later my beautiful baby was born with the help of the vacuum.

To top it off the lovely lady returned while we were having our first cuddles and said "I see you jumped ship as soon as I left".

OMG it makes my blood boil. I've shared this before so sorry to vent again but ggrrr......OB for me next time!!

[Chickadee]

With only one exception, I had lovely midwives after my birth, mostly Irish it seemed. I'd definitely go back to that hospital (private) if I ever have another.

The exception was some b*tch who I'd never seen before and wasn't one of my regular midwives, who walked into my room on Day 4 to pick up a sample or something, I forget what. I'd spent all day trying to get dd to attach - my milk had come in and nothing was working. I'd literally had her on and off my breasts every 20 minutes and so hadn't bothered recording the feedings. What would I have written, 8am - 1pm? She took one look at the chart and told me off for not recording the feedings and then stormed out of the room without even waiting to find out why or offer to help with bf. I burst into tears. Never saw her again thank goodness.

[Kamaikia]

I'm all confused now. People keep mentioning OB's midwife clinics etc. Whats the choices avaliable. When I had my son there was only ever one option and that was delivery by midwife and they would page a doctor if there were serious complications.

[red crayon]

MarthaM - I had a fantastic midwife who was Irish and assisted my Ob to deliver my baby. Her name was Mary and she was fabulous.

I'm sorry to hear so many awful stories. The midwives were pretty good at the hospital I was at. I even had a male midwife, Darren, who was great.

[Kamaikia]

do you mind if I asked what your first thoughts were when a male midwife walked in. What was the reactions of your family?

[madvoice]

You know, I think there should be more male midwives. One was at the Private Hospital I was at and he was absolutely LOVELY!(I only saw him once) Much much much better than any of the grouchy uppity snobby women I had to deal with. He actually showed genuine interest and concern. BRING ON THE MEN!

[Bep]

I agree! Men seems to be more compassionate in this area!

Some midwives are WAY too rough! The one of the ones I had! She was more painful than giving birth!

[pregasaurus]

My last birth and this one I have hired private midwives, a male and a female (same ones both times).
Gary is awesome. He used to be a panelbeater (!), but changed professions about 20 years ago. He has a great sense of humour and is a very laid back, easy-going kind of guy.
It costs a lot of money to go private, but if someone said "you can pay $1200 and never have to see any of those cruel, sadistic b*tches who work at that meat factory up the road ever again", I'd say "yep, where do I sign?".
The best thing was that when things went pear shaped and I had to go into the hospital to deliver anyway, Jean and Gary never left me. I distinctly remember the midwife trying to do something revolting to me and Jean calmly saying "This lady does not want that done to her, thankyou". When there's an independant witness around, the other midwives tend to behave themselves! :D

[red crayon]

wow, pregasaurus, they sound fabulous. Darren the male midwife I had was lovely. Very gentle and respectful when helping with my breastfeeding issues.

[BugBias]

When I went in to the hospital when I was having my DD, the mw didn't believe I was in labour and wanted to send me home (despite the fact she did not moniter me, do and interenal) she just rfused to believe that my waters broke instead saying I wet my self (If only my bladder could hold that much!lol)
Anyway I was in tears and my mother went and called my ob who came in thrity minutes later and did an internal and I was 8cm diolated and said if I had been sent home I would have had my baby in the car park!

[3cherubs]

I had an awesome midwife named Shelley for my second baby.
The ones to me that seem grouchy are the old ones that have been doing it for way tooo long and need to retire.
Midwifes deserve more credit than we give them, they are under a lot of pressure and have a very important job to perform. The OB's get all the praise, they walk in when the baby is ready to drop or we are having trouble.( aslo get payed way more).

So, i say congratulations to all midwifes out there. You ALL do a fantastic job.

Remember: When in labour us women do yell, scream and abuse the midwifes.


sandra

[Rainbowbrite]

When I was in hospital i had 2 GREAT midwives, 1 bad and the rest were just there :rolleyes: The great ones spent the whole day with me teaching me to breastfeed and really helped me with the baby blues. The bad one was just a *****. MJ would not feed properly till day 3 so on night 2 we begged to give her a bottle, which she *****ed about and made us sign the form, then when MJ did feed, I had to use a shield on the left and she condemned me for that and refused to let me use it :eek: . She had me in tears on numerous occasions. After 2 days of her narky comments I asked to never see her again, which the good midwives made sure of.

Its like all hospital stays I hate to say. You always fing there are good and bad nurses etc everywhere :(

[drewid]

Just a quickie.. I've noticed a few of you mums who have had (or been forced to) give your bubs formula early on whilst still in the hospital, and have had to sign some sort of release form?

Just curious as to whether this is standard procedure all over, or just in certain hospitals? My little one had one bottle of formula in hospital as his blood sugar was low and my paediatrician recommended it. But i was never asked to sign anything? I never thought about it until now.

[Rainbowbrite]

Just a quickie.. I've noticed a few of you mums who have had (or been forced to) give your bubs formula early on whilst still in the hospital, and have had to sign some sort of release form?

Just curious as to whether this is standard procedure all over, or just in certain hospitals?

The midwives told me that because we were doing it "against their advice" that we had to sign the form. Maybe because yours was recommended by a Dr not by parental choice you didn't have to?

[alicesmum]

it's sad to read that so many of you have had bad experiences with midwives. what's going wrong with the system??!!!

i went through the RBWH Phoenix Program and all the midwives I saw on that were great!! The two who helped me through my labour were nothing other than awesome. Some of the ones on the ward were pretty grumpy and over-worked, but i could cope with that given my positive experiences during labour.

i hope your future experiences are a bit more positive. :p

[AM]

I'm saddened to hear such a lot of unfavourable stories out there, but all it does is reinforce my decision to always engage my own independant midwife for homebirth.

angie

[kaydensmum]

I don't think i could have 'done it' without my midwives, they were fantastic - mayb i was just lucky??? I was in hospital for 6 days so as u can imagine, i encountered a lot of different midwives/nurses and often with different views, especially re: breastfeeding. However, i have quite a few friends that have been 2 William Angliss and Mitcham Private & boy did they have some unpleasant experiences with the midwives they encountered!! Maybe it's just the luck of the draw - ime not really sure. By the time i was ready to push it wouldn't have worried me if the doctor hadn't turned up, i had complete faith in the staff. :eek:

[Kamaikia]

the one other thing that worried me was the fact that there was only 1 midwife in the room when I had my boy. She walked out for something (after telling me I had a few hours left) and thats when I needed to push. By the time my mother went and got her there was a little head coming out. Throughout the pregnancy I always assumed that there would be more than 1 person in the delivery room??

[aardvark]

I think it is usually standard practice for there to be two attendants - either an OB and a midwife, or 2 midwives.

I remember at my second birth there was some concern if the doctor would make it on time, and the midwife attending me had phoned the ward to get another midwife to come around to the delivery suite. The doctor finally arrived in time, though.

I know that if you are looking into a home birth, while you might have just the one attending midwife providing pre and post natal care, they ask you to book a second midwife to also be present.

[BlueGin]

As a quick side-note; in the past there were always 3 midwives or 2 and the doc (it was standard practice for midwives to do most deliveries and the doc to get there when he could to make sure all was well/stitch if needed). There was always 1 midwife solely focussing on the mother's progress, and keeping her calm, 1 as the main deliverer/baby focus, and a backup in case something went wrong and they would run off and organise any emergency stuff.
Quite scary to hear your stories as it shows that my expectations are way off, I will just have to prepare to look after myself it seems!

[aardvark]

On the strength of the bad experience I had the first time, and subsequent good experiece the second time, I'm considering booking an Independant Midwife to be with me in the hospital in addition to having my OB.

The second time, I went to a private hospital which ran a "Know Your Midwife" scheme, and you could choose the midwife you wanted to attend you, and she was put on call for you, and stayed with you regardless of shift changes etc until you delivered. The hospital has stopped running that programme, and it bothers me that getting a good one, or getting a bad one will depend one who happens to be rostered for labour ward that shift/shifts.

The only things which have put me off going the whole Homebirth route with a midwife is that hubby is not at all keen, and the notion of a few days away from home with just baby to myself for most of the day is VERY appealing, and at home, I won't get that quiet "us" time.

[Rainbowbrite]

I only had 1 midwife present throughout my labour, then when I was ACTUALLY delivering, they called in a second just incase the baby needed help (which thank god she didn't) As soon as MJ was born and they saw that she was happy and healthy the second midwife left.

Thats what my husband thinks happened anyway, we were a bit pre-occupied :D

[shellbell]

this thread reminds me of something that the midwife who did our antenatal classes said.

she told us that giving birth was one of the most important things we'd ever do, so if we got a midwife that we didn't like, we should ask for someone else.

i'm curious as to whether anyone actually did this ...

[Lucybelle]

I would have asked for another midwife had one been available - no one bothered to tell my ob I was there (they THOUGHT he had called in sick - which he hadn't). Despite me telling her I would go quick (4hrs with #1), despite me telling her something was wrong (my back was badly damaged and I didn't know xpt for the horrible pain that was NOT contractions) - she would not dicuss pain relief "for at least 4 hrs" and told me to have a bath instead, and told me to call if I needed to push in a charming smartass tone. Bub was born 10 min later - one push, my sister had to drag her out of another room or she would have missed it.
the so-called dr stood in a corner in shock, then the midwife screamed that he was too small. He was over 6 pounds.

[chellegoth]

Two things spring to mind for me. One that I am glad there are other women who had terrible midwives as you get left thinking you are the only one. And two I am appalled at these midwives and how they treat their patients.

I did not meet one good midwife during my 31 hour labour. My entire stay in that hospital was so traumatising that I will never have another child.

My initial midwife also told me that my waters hadn't broken without actually checking and hooked me up to that drip that speeds up contractions to break my waters ( which had actually broken at 4pm the previous afternoon but was told I wasn't allowed to come in till about 7am). The result of the drip was no break in contractions and me screaming and unable to even think of one swear word. A doctor did come in after he heard me screaming and asked if I wanted pain relief. I nodded as I couldn't speak, but the midwife told him to go away and that I didn't need drugs. After he left she then turned around to me and said " Why are you screaming, it's really annoying. Just breathe and the pain will go away." She also said my attire was inapropriate and demanded that I take it off.

They finally did an internal after this midwife left, at around midday. They discovered that my waters had indeed broken and now my daughter was stuck and had been for quite a while. At this point all they would give me was pethadine. I managed to get a little bit of rest after this but it quickly wore off and I was back to where I was. I eventually got an epidural which again wore off quickly so they called someone else to do another one. When he started tutting about what the first guy did I was a little concerned and now my back is stuffed from it. A few hours of pushing they realised that my daughter was not going anywhere and was now starting to suffer. This is when they decided to take me up to surgery to get her out. Signing lots of forms and having lots of doctors talk to you when you have been in labour for more than 24 hours with almost no sleep and no food is never the best. This is the point when I started throwing up. More epidural and they finally got her out with forcepts and lots of cutting.

She didn't cry even when they were tryign to stimulate her which was a worry, I continued throwing up and was shaking. The doctor wass having trouble stopping the bleeding even after I told them that I am a carrier for haemophillia which makes me bleed more that most people.

Once I hit the maternity ward, the nurses just got worse. I had to stay in for 4 days and was lucky to get out after that. One nurse made me get out of bed for something, yanked me up and I broke my stiches and bled everywhere. After many requests I didn't get a change of sheets for the entire time I was there. The breast feeding was a fiasco, first with them telling me I would have a lot of trouble and pinching me so hard they left bruises and made me bleed. Breast feeding after that was pure agony. Not only did I get the baby blues but my mother told me that her best friend had died 15 minutes after my daughter was born. I did finally escape the hospital after a ton of other crap and now will never have another child because of this.

To the person who said all midwives need to be thanked because we swear at them, I think there are plenty of us who have had very bad births because of them and will not be thanking them for it. They should not be able to treat their patients like that, ever!

[Briannabear]

Hear, Hear!!

[pregasaurus]

Well, this thread was confirmed for me today as I did my last official shift at the hospital before my baby is born. I walked into a room with a very scared looking lady in the corner and a hideous, agressive midwife throwing her newborn son around the room. I walked in and introduced myself as the lady from the Breastfeeding Association, to which she barked back "Well, good you're here, this little sh*t won't feed. I'm going to **** him off by taking all his clothes off!" To which she threw him on the bed and reefed his clothes off.
I just said in a very gentle voice "No baby's a little s***, he just needs to be taught what to do". "Well, you bloody fix it then!" She snapped at me before storming out of the room and slamming the door shut. The poor mother was in tears sitting in the corner with her shirt off and her bra undone, icepacks(!) on both breasts.
Well, eventually we sorted it out but poor Mum and baby were so wound up and distressed, both were very traumatised by this revolting woman. ANYONE in the medical profession should KNOW that gentle and calm gets you MUCH further than agressive and rude.

[Briannabear]

Oh my gosh thats disgusting. That poor woman and her dear little baby. :(

[madvoice]

OMG that midwife was disgusting and she should be barred from being a nurse or a midwife for that matter with that attitude. That poor woman. At least I had enough guts to stand up for myself and give as good as I got. Some people aren't that strong. Poor little baby. No little baby is ever a sh!t. Their emotions are pure. Poor woman and poor baby for having to deal with such a b!tch.

[Chickadee]

Pregasaurus,
That midwife needs to be reported, reprimanded and either have to go through re-training or removed from the ward. I'm not sure if you can do the reporting as only a bystander, or if you want to get involved (I know it's a lot to take on), but no woman or her child should ever have to suffer through treatment like that ever again.

[lil monkey]

I was warned about midwives by my ob before I went into hospital but I was pleasantly surprised.

At 25 weeks I had a scare where I thought my waters had broken and I called the hospital and they said to call back in an hour to see if I still had cramps etc. Anyway, to cut a long story short, they insisted that I go into the hospital to be checked out and they didn't treat me like an inexperienced mum to be but they thoroughly checked me out and called the ob in to check me and they insisted I stay the night. At midnight when they noticed that I was still awake and stressed, the nurse came in and offered me a glass of warm milk to help me sleep!

Then when the day came to have bub, and through my stay in hospital, I had various midwives and all were different but wonderful. They all helped me with breastfeeding and there was one in particular who I thought was rough as all hell but she was the one who sorted out my cracked nipples and breast feeding attachment problems! I was a pro at breastfeeding by day 2 when other mums were still struggling by day 7! I had a c-section and I was walking around the 2nd day and showered by myself even though the midwives wanted to help me out. WHen I said I was in pain, they handed over the drugs and were always checking on me and making sure i was getting rest.

For anyone who's interested, i had Tayla at St John Of God Hospital murdoch in perth!

On reading these other posts, i thank god that I was given great midwives otherwise it would have really affected my first few days after the birth. I feel awful for that poor woman who's baby was nearly abused. What a horrible woman!

I believe it takes a true strength of character to make a good midwife and if you do meet a good one then let them know. If you meet a bad one then fill in the comment card when you leave hospital!

[pregasaurus]

A formal complaint has been made. I will let you all know of the outcome. I feel sick that in 2005 there are people in the medical profession that think this is appropriate behaviour.

[Briannabear]

Im glad to hear that you made a complaint! Keep us posted!

[jessica]

I'll start by saying that some midwives are brillant, and I know that hospitals are understaffed and that midwives working long shifts with lots of mums and babies to look after are understandbly exhausted BUT...

I was an unexperienced and probably very naive first time mum in hospital, I had had a caesar so wasn't too flexible and getting bubs out of her crib for a feed was very tricky and uncomfortable - when I called for help MOST nurses were only too happy to help and stayed to check she was attaching etc.. as I said I was naive! I had no idea that when your milk finally came in your boobs went red hot and felt like they were about to explode!! Well this happened at about 2am in the morning of my second day in hospital and of course I was horrified, tired, frightened and alone! When I buzzed for a nurse she stormed in and said, "What's wrong" I said "my boobs really hurt and are all hot?" She said "well pick up the baby and feed it!" and stormed off!! Naturally I started crying as number one I couldn't roll over to pick her up and number two I thought something was wrong with me and three as you imagine getting a baby to attach to engorged breats is no easy feat!! Anyway lets just say that I didn't have too many happy experiences in hospital and was glad when they asked me to leave on day three because they needed my bed :eek: !!!

[red crayon]

I wonder if the mums who had bad midwife experiences have hospitals in common? Should we start a log of places to be avoided? Or is that legally a bit dodgy?

[pregasaurus]

As has been said before, there are good midwives and bad midwives. It's unfair that their are bad apples that taint the whole barrel, or in this case a whole hospital. I don't think avoiding the hospitals is the answer, but putting in complaints whenever we recieve bad care will soon get the message through that this behaviour will not be tolerated.

After having said all that, EVERY SINGLE DEALING I've had with the Launceston General Hospital has been terrible. Every ward I've come into contact with has had people who should reconsider their careers, from the Emergency Department, labour ward, post natal ward, kids ward, oncology and general.

The two most severe examples I can think of was while I was in anaphylaxis, a doctor injected 3 times the recommended amount of adrenaline straight into my vein, and my heart stopped and I had to be resusciated.
My husband went into 8 hour life saving surgery , despite me repeatedly telling them they had the wrong guy, as the wrong person. The person had the same first and last names, but different birthdate and middle names. As I said, I told them several times, but of course I'm just the stupid wife, what would I know. It was finally the ICU nurses AFTER the operation who listened to me.

[jessica]

I don't know about the legality of naming hospitals - if I can't please feel free to delete this post! I have to say in addition to the above post about my birth experience we recently had a very negative and traumatic experience at the same hospital after expereincing a miscarriage - I will never return to Brisbane's Mater PUBLIC hospital!! I'm sure there are positive stories about this place out there but I have very little good to say about it!

[red crayon]

I hear you, pregasaurus. I just hate reading about these awful experiences women are having. And that experience your poor husband had just takes the cake. I guess we need to keep supporting each other and doing what we can to make women's birthing experiences positive.

[chellegoth]

how many of us were in the position to actually put a complaint in? I know I certainly didn't want to make my life more difficult when I was in hospital and once I was out I never wanted to go back there again.

It's all well and good to say we should complain, but during my labour I wasn't really in the frame of mind to take names for future reference.

[aardvark]

The other thing to consider is that a lot of midwives are from agencies, and that means you could end up with the same dodgey midwife at any number of hospitals.

[Kamaikia]

As far as I'm concerned its not worth it complaining to a hospital about anyone. I put in a formal complaint about a doctor I saw at a antenatal appointment not long before my son was born. This women was terrible. She put me down, questioned me about having no husband, was really rough and the list goes on. I walked out of the hospital in tears (and trust me i am not a crier usually) swearing never to go back again (stupid, as it was the only hospital avaliable. Anyway after the complaint was lodged the hospital contacted me (by phone and letter) saying that they had taken the complaint to the doctor involved and that a mark had been put on my record for future that this doctor was never to treat me again.
The day my son was due to go home from hospital I was waiting for a doctor to give him the all clear and who walks in - yes this doctor that wasn't supposed to come near me. There was also a nurse in the room. She went through everything then discoved I was going to be bottle feeding - well I had a 15 minute lecture from her about how disgusting it is that a parent would take a risk like this. I calmly explained to her that I had made an informed decision and that I expected the hospital to respect that. Then she started on about me being single again - I just walked out.
Again I made a complaint about this doctor. Same response
4 months later my son stopped breathing while out shopping - we rushed him the emergency where the put him on oxygen and admitted him for 48 hours observation. Next morning the same doctor walks in. I told her to leave the room - that i would only see another doctor. She came back with another (great) doctor who checked my son over and said that he would keep watching him for another night. This female doctor then told me she thought there was nothing wrong with my son - it was my first child and I was overreacting. She said it was no more than a cold, that I should take him home, put some saline up his nose. I flipped - swore and abuse her - told her to get out of the room before I broke her jaw (yes i can get nasty when i need too). I asked to speek to someone about what happened with my complaints - I have never heard a word back from them.
Oh and for the record my son had a viral infection and that last night in hospital my son stopped breathing twice.
Not even worth the 25 cents for the phone call to put the complaint in if you ask me

[Merlion]

I had all good mid-wives while i was in hospital for 12 days due to the fact Ms Jessica had low blood sugar levels and had wires, drips coming out from every part of her body (well it felt that way - first was her nose where milk was given, then her stomach - which caused her to have an infection which caused 41'C temperature, then her hand and then finally she was breast fed but was in neo-natal for 10 days. All the mid-wives bar one were great. The one horrible mid wife was brutal and said that I should leave the neo-natal as I had spent 4 hour sitting by my daughters bedside worrying about her as her sugar levels kept on dropping every four hours (her sugar levels were tested every four hours for the first 9 days she was neo natal.) She said not to worry that she would be released soon & they knew what they were doing.

I left the room and was called 5 mins later saying that her heart beat was erratic and that she stopped breathing. I practically ran downstairs (mind you I had a c-section and it was only the 3rd day) They resucitated her and her heart went back to normal. I was so mad at the nurse that I had to actually calm down before I could screamblue murder at her for being so insensitive. I never saw her again for the rest of my stay (thankfully!!!)

My milk supply took 5 days to start flowing. All of a sudden I had a crying streak due to the fact hubbie was going home and I was stuck in hospital by myself (it was to expensive for hubbie to stay the night) and I really wanted him to stay and all of a sudden my milk came through in a rush through my breast pad, through my clothes and then on my hubbie :eek: . It was very embarrasing as I was in the foyer and had to go past all the people in the foyer upstairs to my expressing machine too express my milk.

I had a older midwife who was very patient with me and who was very gentle with me especially when my boobs were so big and heavy and all Jess wanted to do was sleep and was not interested in feeding. She showed me how to express and use frozen cabbage leaves (these really work :) ).

I think everyone was glad to see me and jessica leave as she was a talk of the hospital as everytime their was change over in paedetrician they would compare who had the lowest sugar read for the night. As every night her sugar levels would raise and then fall and raise and fall. It was scary as the last 3 days before i left the paed said she could be released from neo-natal if her sugar levels stayed above 3 for 24 hours it stayed above 3 for about 18 hours and all of a sudden it dropped to 2.5 we had to stay another day due to this and another so i could learn to look after her myself.

[Merlion]

Well, this thread was confirmed for me today as I did my last official shift at the hospital before my baby is born. I walked into a room with a very scared looking lady in the corner and a hideous, agressive midwife throwing her newborn son around the room. I walked in and introduced myself as the lady from the Breastfeeding Association, to which she barked back "Well, good you're here, this little sh*t won't feed. I'm going to **** him off by taking all his clothes off!" To which she threw him on the bed and reefed his clothes off.
I just said in a very gentle voice "No baby's a little s***, he just needs to be taught what to do". "Well, you bloody fix it then!" She snapped at me before storming out of the room and slamming the door shut. The poor mother was in tears sitting in the corner with her shirt off and her bra undone, icepacks(!) on both breasts.
Well, eventually we sorted it out but poor Mum and baby were so wound up and distressed, both were very traumatised by this revolting woman. ANYONE in the medical profession should KNOW that gentle and calm gets you MUCH further than agressive and rude.


Poor woman. They don't have a right to that.

on another note. I call my bubs a "little s***t" sometimes especially when she screams and cries all morning everytime I put her down in her rocker to do something ie make her bottle up or get a drink or feed myself but as soon as mum or dad get there to look after her for a couple of hours so i can go to work she's all smiles and laughs and waves at me while i walk out the door. I say that lovingly but if a mid wife said that to me i would have been liable for decking them and saying how can you say that to someone's child

[mumof2girls]

I had both male and female midwives when I gave birth to both my girls (2 years apart) and they were great, I was tired after 14 hours of intense contractions starting at 5 mins straight away and even when their shift had ended they still didn't leave till my girls were born, they would be on the bed with me holding my hands while I was pushing my bubs out (hubby was watching), they gave me so much encouragement and advice it was great, not only during but afterwards as well, I can't praise them enough and I had a 3rd degree tear and wasn't allowed to even sit up for 3 days and they never once complained when I wanted to hold my daughter or put her back in her crib etc. I'm glad I had such good experiences and I'm sorry for everyone here who has had such a bad time. :)

[mummyb]

hi
ive had experinces with both realy bad and realy good midwifes ,i think the main problem is lack of funding and education .
women need to know there rights and responsbilits before having there bub and who to talk to if things arent going well.
when i had my second baby iit was a vbac ,i slept through a lot of it but when the pain was so intense i just shut my eyes,
it wasnt till just before i pushed hi out that i saw a room full of very anxious looking women ,midwifes and doctors .
even then it didnt register that somethng could be wrong ,i had a healthy baby boy but only because of those women .and one very cute(not in a sexy way ) male midwife student that just helped me so much i would ask for him again if i went for num 3.
when i had my first ds a midwife walked in spread my legs to put a catheda in i just went mental and in the end the other midwife asked her to leave cause she was upsetting me so much ,i dont know why i got so upset by her i just did .
i ve realy enjoyed reading al your stories .goodluck everyone with any future midwifes you may meet ;)

[StormAngel]

Hi

I had my four kids in small country hospitals where there is only one midwife on at a time plus an EN, and i found the midwives to all be pretty good.

There was one though who, when she found out that my GP was going to induce me with bub #4, gave me a big speach about induced labour being longer and harder than usual (is this true?) and that i should reconsider, at this point i had been in & out of hospital for 2 wks, with false labours & high blood pressure, basically i had had enough and my GP agreed it was time for me to have this bub.

Needless to say, i told her to get lost (she went off shift 1/2hr later)

Sorry for rambling!

P.S the next morning she came back on and couldn't beleive i'd only been in labour for 4hrs before bub was born! LOL

[Benandrewsmum]

It is amazing reading all of your stories.

I had an absolute angel of a midwife during my labour and given that my entire labour only went for 4 hours (lucky me) I was fortunate not to loose her to a shift change!

However, once I got to the ward after delivery I encountered some very very dodgy people who had the nerve to call themselves health care professionals!! I was a first time mum who was experiencing great difficulty breastfeeding. After getting 3 different sets of advice each day (at each shift change) I finally asked to see a lactation consultant to help me out.

I had sent my hubby to the ward desk to get a bottle as I needed to express before I started feeding....he came back to the room with the midwife from hell hot on his heels. I was in the middle of a session with my lactation consultant when this lady stormed into my room and chastised me for requesting a bottle given that I already had one in the fridge. She went mad on me like a school child and told me I must store milk in little yellow bottles and label them correctly blah blah blah! She was virtually yelling at me!

I told her that I was in the middle of something far more important than little yellow bottles (learning how to feed properly with the help of lactation lady) and that she was to leave my room and never enter again without knocking first and having my express permission to enter!!

I do not know where this show of strength came from considering how fragile I was!! I do not care if this lady was having a bad day because I am quite sure that there were a lot of first time mums on that ward who were having a worse day!!

To be a midwife is such an important role, it is such a shame that people like this lady spoil it for the good midwives and tarnish our baby experiences!! It seemed to me that the maternity ward at my hospital (Mater Private in Brisbane) was so crowded and the nurses were so over worked!!

Cheers

Ben's mum

[Grubincubator]

I hired my own doula for our birth (and ante and postnatal visits) and I'm so relieved that I did. In hindsight I don't know how I possibly could have managed without her.

Unfortunately it's quite an expensive option but worth every cent in my opinion.
She's quite a regular at the private hospital we chose so the midwives there have learned to leave her well alone. You still can't have everything exactly as you like it due to hospital policy but she's put an enormous amount of time and energy into 'educating' them.

She's also a vigorous campaigner for changing the maternity health system in Australia and more power to her. A midwife-based model of maternity care would save the health system a lot of money and provide a much happier birthing experience for all.

I had to have an obstetrician just to get into our hospital of choice - also a VERY expensive option - which absolutely stinks. But that's just the way the system works unless you are willing to use a (and have a good local) public facility.

/rant off :p /

[lani]

I sympathise with all the women that had bad experiences.
I however had great midwives and obs with all my false labours/bleeds/etc and both my actual labours.
I've worked in my local hospital since the start of 2002, while I have come across many nurses and doctors alike who I feel need to re-evaluate their careers, all the midwives there are great both to work with and to labour with.

[Harmony83]

I had a really great midwife for the first half of my labour, she was so encouraging and supportive. I did get annoyed with the older midwife that came in when I was about to deliver!! She reminded me of a drill sargeant, and start pushing me into having an episiotomy (sp?)!! (I didn't have one and didn't even tear - yay!!)

[melzy]

I went into hospital for my checkup on my due date and had very high bloody pressure. They were going to induce me but an emergency took priority and had to wait until Monday as they didn't like to induce on the weekend. During my stay in hospital I was hassled by another patient who didn't seem with it. She would fart in my room before I even knew she was. She'd walk in, start talking and farting. I was in complete shock. If I ate, she would barge in, when it was time to check how far dilated I was she walked in on me. Even after 17 hours labour and I had to be taken to surgery for a possible c section she was hassling me all the way. I lost it and said to the nurse, please tell her to F*** off. She even walked in on me when I was walking to the toilet and there was mess all over the floor (if you know what I mean without getting all yucky). I was at breaking point!

After the birth I was taken back to my room and my partner and sister went and looked after my new baby girl. I was in the room, on the bed, alone, in pain still, couldn't reach a button for assistance, nothing. I waited an hour, alone. :(

I was very exhausted and wasn't sleeping well the next couple of days. One midwife said to me "that's it, top her up after her last feed and ring for a nurse. Tell her to take bubs for the night so I can get a rest". Ah wonderful I thought. The time had come, I rang the nurse. I asked her to take bubs and she asked why. I told her I was completely exahusted and was told to rest. She responded "this is not a child care centre. You have had a baby now and you must accept responsibility" and she walked out. I sat there in the chair crying my heart out.

The next day the midwife who advised me to put bubs in the nursery came back. She enquired on how well I would have slept. I broke down and told her what happened. "Right, have a shower, you and your bf go and put her in the nursery and go and have a coffee" she said. So I had a shower, did my hair and face and off to the nursery we went.

We walked up to the midwife who was looking after the bubs in the nursery and my bf said "We are just heading out for a coffee, where would you like us to put our baby". She shrugged her head, "I am busy, just dump her over there" and she spointed to the direction. "Pardon" we both said. "Dump her over there" she repeated. That was it, I WENT OFF MY HEAD! "Dump her over there, I am not dumping her over there, I am not leaving her in here" and I took my daughter out of the nursery in hysterics. I yelled all the way down the hallway, repeating what she said.

The nice midwife came out and asked me what happened and I told her. I was that devistated and crushed that I collapsed and couldn't feel my legs. I completely s*** myself as I have heard stories about what an epidural can do to you. She and my bf lifted me up and a couple of minutes later they were fine. I couldnt breathe, complete panic. I told her that she was to be sacked and I told her that the midwife was so fat she looked like she ate children. I wanted to beat her up, I wanted her to lose her job. I felt completely crushed.

This cow had to apologise to me before she left. When she came in and apologised she admitted that she HAD to apologise before she could leave work and that was the only reason why she was talking to me. I did not accept her apology and told her that besides looking after the newborns that she and all midwives should be considerate to how the mother is coping. She agreed.

After spending about 6 days in hospital after the birth due to infections and high blood pressure still I was allowed out. My bf drove us home and I recall us sitting in the back on a beautiful day, wind in my hair, holding our precious and beautiful gift and I said "We have finally left the prison and are going home".

[alindrina]

What an evil midwife! How evil and strange and insensitive! I hope she is sacked. I'm sure if she keeps carrying on so ridiculously, some more patients will complain and some action will be taken? I hope so, anyway.
I had great midwives mostly. When my first baby was stillborn I had a very kind midwife who helped with funeral arrangements and she was so kind, she made me think I would like to be a midwife despite the terrible ordeal of losing my child.
I was lucky to have other great midwives with my son William, except one midwife or nurse seemed to think I was about 14 (I was 19) and I loved my son so much but when she saw me wheeling him around the hospital taking him for walks she said "Are you trying to sell that baby?" I was dumbfounded! I didn't say anything. There was a nice midwife who helped me establish breastfeeding and when the other girl in my room left and a few other women and babies left, she had more time and was always chatting to me.
I had a midwife who was good at delivering Sarah but she seemed to think I was not going to have her for ages, and she kept wandering off to check on another lady who delivered 4 hours after me. I asked how dilated I was and she refused to check, but she was lovely when Sarah was born and I managed to escape tearing because of this midwife's skill when she delivered Sarah.
I had no midwife attention at all when I had Maverick!! I don't blame her..... she obviously thought I had ages to go. I went from 3 cm to 10 cm in about 2 and a half hours and nobody checked me in all that time. 10 minutes before I had Maverick I was in the shower and the doctor popped her head in and I said "I'm in a fair bit of pain" and the doctor said "Pain is good!" and walked off. I am not blaming her as she is a lovely person and she ensured I had heaps of supervision when I had Harrison, but I delivered Maverick myself in the shower, with nobody else there! I was sitting on the toilet and felt the head had crowned. I calmly told DH to get the doctor. I stood up and involuntarily pushed his head out!! I was screaming "Help me!" and then involuntarily pushed his body out. He landed hard on his side on the shower floor. Luckily he was fine. The doctor ran into the room just as he was coming out and she couldn't catch him. The midwife was on her tea break.... she should have checked me earlier but I don't blame her and I don't like people poking and prodding at me.
I had a wonderful midwife, Fiona (the nice one in Moree was also called Fiona when I had William, and my name is Fiona too lol) who delivered Harrison. The doctor had told the midwife not to leave me under any circumstances and she only left me a couple of times and had two nursing students with me the whole time. She was wonderful.
I have largely had good experiences with midwives and these stories are horrifying! I feel sorry for people who have had bad experiences with midwives, especially the one who called the baby a little sh!t ( my friend called William that once but I wasn't offended but I would be if it was a midwife) and some of these terrible ones who give people pethidine without consent, accuse mothers of starving their babies and say "Give me a call when you start pushing" and then scream that the baby is too small!! What is the world coming to !!!?????
Fiona 28
DH Peter 34
DS William 13.11.96
DD Sarah 6.12.98
DS Maverick 22.5.01
DS Harrison 22.9.03

[supermiddy]

as an appropriate health care professional currently working in the field it's good to see some positive feedback :o - truth as opposed to fiction...

[Briannabear]

truth as opposed to fiction...

What are you implying is fiction?

[shniks]

Every single one of the midwives at Melbourne's northern hospital were amazing! They were so helpful, caring and knowledgeable, after reading this post I realise how lucky I was.
However there was one exception - this aggressive midwife that was a lactation consultant as well. I was having trouble get DD to latch on one side, she got angry at my baby and told me 'she should just go on, she is being difficult' and proceeded to shove my poor crying baby's face into my breast, she was very rough. Of course it did not work, my baby was hysterical, and I managed to get her on later with the gentle help of another midwife. This nasty midwife also told me I was starving my baby even though I had BF her continuously nearly all day - I think my low supply paranoia and failure to successfully BF began with that very comment from her. I wish I had reported her.

[redbaby]

I am really sorry to hear about all of these people having such horrible times with their midwives,...when you need the most support in the world,.to have a terrible person 'assisting you' would be the pits,. I had a team of BRILLIANT midwives and lactation consultants when I had Scarlett,...... All of them were divine,.... We were at Royal North Shore Private,..so maybe that is the one difference between public and private? God,..if that is why we paid to go to a private hospital, then it was worth every cent!

[madvoice]

What are you implying is fiction?

I'm with you Briannabear. What fiction was there in my story? If I dreamt it then I must've been mad

[pregasaurus]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Briannabear
What are you implying is fiction?


I'm with you Briannabear. What fiction was there in my story? If I dreamt it then I must've been mad


I'm with you guys, the thread is called bad midwives, and we've all posted our experiences of midwives who we felt did not do thier jobs properly. What is ficticious about that?

[Chickadee]

Ok, Can we please all lay off supermiddy until she's had a chance to respond? No fair ganging up on her.

I suspect that her comment wasn't addressed to anyone in particular who has posted here, but that perhaps in her experience she mostly hears about bad midwives - lets face it, most of us (not all) are more likely to complain and take action about a bad experience than to go out of our way to write a note of thank you to the good midwives we've had. I certainly meant to write a note, but in the hectic days and weeks just out of hospital I found I'd even forgotten their names.

[Funkychicken]

Hi there,
Thought I'd share my experiences with midwives. My first bub was born in 1998 and apart from being induced (drs orders, not midwives) I had some beautiful midwives come and go throughout the day. When it was all over I was looked after very well and couldn't have been happier with the way the labour ward midwives had helped me throughout the whole experience. The next morning I wandered back to the labour ward with my newborn son to "show" him to the midwife whose shift had finished before he was born. She was wonderful-holding him and congratulating us although we had never met prior to 24hrs before. On returning to the maternity ward I was chastised heavily for having entered the labour ward-apparently I wasn't meant to be in there, and also for carrying my child, not pushing him in his plastic crib. What a downer after my wonderful experience in the labour ward. I wasn't upset at being told the rules, it was the tone and manner used by the ward midwife. I was still on cloud nine(hundred) though and didn't think a lot more about it. I then had another midwife come to 'inspect' me whilst I tried breastfeeding my son. This was a tricky thing to do first time and she ended up yelling at me and grabbing my breast in one hand and my baby's head with the other and tried to make them connect! I asked her to leave as my son was a basket case at this stage. An hour and some tears later, I was visited by the next midwife who happened to be filling in for someone and was also a lactation consultant. This lady was the most wonderful thing to happen to my son and I. First she spent ten minutes talking to me, then explained a bit about breastfeeding and finally assissted me to attach my baby correctly. Twice, other midwives came and told her to hurry up as she had more mums to see to but both times she defiantly said she would move on when she felt I was OK. This lady was a godsend. The contrast between labour ward midwives and maternity ward midwives was amazing. It took me quite some time to see the experience in perspective. I hope if you have more babies you get to experience the "nice" side of midwives. We all deserve to be treated with respect and kindness. As a final point, I had my 2nd baby in a birth centre and found this to be a wonderful experience all round and I am also booked at another new birth centre for my third. Good Luck for the future.

[busymidi]

I am really sad to hear all these terrible stories about midwives. As a midwife currenty working in a continuity of care model, we look after lots of women with different personalities. While I am sure there are personality clashes and midwives may not always seem to do what women in labour want them to do, we are there to try to make your labour a good experinece. I think that a lot of you do not really understand that labour is not predictable. While you may think we should know how long your labour will be, we don't. Even your Obstetrician will not know!!! :eek: We also do not make decisions regarding inducing people with drugs or breaking your waters without consulting a obstetrician. So when you all rave about how great the Ob is and how crap the midwife is, remember that more often than not, the midwife is really the messenger coming from the Ob. do you see your obstetrician sitting with you throughout your labour? The ob will only come when the baby is ready to pop out and even then they will cut an episiotomy if they think they will be waiting around for too long. :(
I think that before you all complain about your birth experience you should consider how flexible your birth plan was and did you discuss your plan with the midwife prior to labour?
Some birth experiences are traumatic, and this is unfortunate. For those of you who are still distressed, debriefing with a health care professional may be waht is needed for you to move on. I really think there needs to be a page called "All the Fabulous Midwives" or at least one called "My Bad Obstetrician Experience".

[tickle]

I have to agree, the ob I got on the day was a really weird a**hole. It was so strange, people say you have no inhibitions after giving birth, but I felt weird when he was putting me back together. Not a friendly guy!! I guess you can get the good and the bad with both.

[madvoice]

I am really sad to hear all these terrible stories about midwives. As a midwife currenty working in a continuity of care model, we look after lots of women with different personalities. While I am sure there are personality clashes and midwives may not always seem to do what women in labour want them to do, we are there to try to make your labour a good experinece. I think that a lot of you do not really understand that labour is not predictable. While you may think we should know how long your labour will be, we don't. Even your Obstetrician will not know!!! :eek: We also do not make decisions regarding inducing people with drugs or breaking your waters without consulting a obstetrician. So when you all rave about how great the Ob is and how crap the midwife is, remember that more often than not, the midwife is really the messenger coming from the Ob. do you see your obstetrician sitting with you throughout your labour? The ob will only come when the baby is ready to pop out and even then they will cut an episiotomy if they think they will be waiting around for too long. :(
I think that before you all complain about your birth experience you should consider how flexible your birth plan was and did you discuss your plan with the midwife prior to labour?
Some birth experiences are traumatic, and this is unfortunate. For those of you who are still distressed, debriefing with a health care professional may be waht is needed for you to move on. I really think there needs to be a page called "All the Fabulous Midwives" or at least one called "My Bad Obstetrician Experience".

Giving birth is never predictable. That is a given FACT! However, RUDNESS by medical professionals should NEVER EVER be tolerated. Bedside manner these days often leaves a lot to be desired.

Funnily enough the midwife I had problems with was also rude to two friends of mine. Once, benefit of the doubt, twice? co-incidence maybe? Three times? Hmm that starts to set off alarm bells.

I don't think those of us who have suffered at the rudness of some midwives (note I did not say all) should have to justify ourselves.

[Goddess_Mamma]

I can empathise with all the women here who had their birth experiences ruined or damaged by insenstive, incompetent and mean medical staff - I too was experienced care that was so inappropriate, incompetent and rude that I am currently on my fourth page of a detalied complaint letter to the hospital that I ws cared by. But I did and have previsouly came into contact with good people, good and caring and competent and DEDICATED midwives.

I am a direct-entry midwifery student, this means that I have not had to obtain a nursing degree, I am straight up and all about maternity care. As I have no nursing background I have not been institutionalised to treat pregnant, birthing or postnatal women as 'sick' or as 'patients.' The new midwives who are coming out from our degree are culturally safe, competent, women-centred, and sensitive to the needs of fellow women.

While in hospital after my caesarean I was assualted by a midwife, intimidated and rudely spoken to by another, and left completely alone to my own devices regardless of my pleas for help or the ill health of my baby. What I refer to as my assault, was when a midwife harshly grabbed my breasts to attach my baby without asking me if I was comfortable and consented to this.

It is important to know that there are many people in all professions who should leave those professions - they have lost the spark for it, are imcompetent and cannot provide quality care for the people they deal with. I think that if you work with people when they are at valunerable times in their lives, and you hate your job, then you NEED to quit to protect people from the damage you are going to inflict upon them, conscioulsy or unconsciously. Unfortunately when these are the only people that you come into contact with they are what you base your opinion upon the profession which they represent - these people are giving the rest of the competent and wonderful midwives a bad name.

I am immensly saddened that this topic is full of so many posts, and stoies much like my own. My experiences and those of fellow women make me even more determined and dedicated to be the best damn midwife I can be! THank you all for sharing your stories

Goddess_Mamma

[mytwolilprinces]

I also had a bad experience with a midwife at my first birth ( 2nd baby due in 6 weeks ). I don't mind telling anyone that it was at St George Private. My waters broke at midnight on my due date, I rang the hospital and as I had GBS I was told to have a shower then come straight in. Upon arrival, I was met by the midwife from hell. She showed me to my room and then promptly left me. I called her to come back after about 15 mins as I had started having contractions and they were exactly 5 mins apart. She felt my stomach as I was having one ( and yes, they were painful and I could barely breath ) and told me - you are not in labour, it's "pre-labour". She then gave me 2 panadols and a sleeping pill and turned out the light telling me " we'll see how you are doing in the morning.

By this stage I was getting frightened and worried about the baby, the contractions were getting closer and really painful. As I had GBS it was important for me to have antibiotics at least 4 hrs before the arrival of the baby - I was worried there wouldn't be much time. I called her back again and she watched me have a contraction - she yelled at me for not breathing properly. I asked if there was anything I could have as I was in a lot of pain by this stage. She reluctantly gave me an internal and I was 5cm dialated and definatley in labour. Luckily her shift ended before the arrival of my beautiful son.

I am now having this baby at another hospital to avoid this midwife who I know still works there! I was admitted with pre-term labour symptoms to Kareena Private a couple of weeks back and I would like to say that the midwives there are fantastic!

[Mamaduke]

Hi,
I know this is the bad midwives section but I first must begin with giving a huuuuge plug to all the wonderful midwives in the maternity unit and the special care nursery at....
BOX HILL HOSPITAL - BIRRALEE!!!!!! YEAH YEAH TREMENDOUS APPLAUSE!!!!!!!
When I had my first DS I ended up having an emergency c/s 4 weeks prem. The midwives were fantastic. I was in labour for 12 hours (but I do tell people 18!!!!) and they were so caring and reassuring. Anyway, I thought so much of them that we went back a year later and had DS have photos with the girls!!!
Now, back to midwives from hell!
Last year I had my second DS in Mitcham Private (for the purposes of not being sued I will not mention the particular midwife, nor is this a reflection on Mitcham Private as a whole) that said, I had a pretty traumatic time with 4 unsuccessful spinal blocks, then g/a, then a huuuge spinal headache! One of the midwives (from an agency), refused to give me any pain medication when I had the wretched headache (it had not been confirmed as a spinal headache yet), and told me to wait for a couple of hours and then she could give me a Panadol (I know where that Panadol would have ended up!!!!)
Then after I went back to theatre to have the spinal headache sorted out, I was finally back in my room and really struggling with breastfeeding. That's when this big oaf of a midwife comes in, doesn't introduce herself and states, "you're ready to go home tomorrow."
I told her that my ob said that because of the extra trip to surgery I was to stay at least 2 more days. She started to argue with me that it's not his decision and he didn't say anything like that to her, that there was no reason for me to be there, that they have mothers waiting for my bed and generally trying to intimidate me into leaving. I told her that it wasn't my problem that they had a shortage of beds as I've paid my private health insurance premium like everyone else and that I wasn't going anywhere, but at the time I did feel quite intimidated by this 'woman' literally standing over me. Luckily for me my basic '*****' instinct kicked in and I was able to put my foot down and refuse to go. For a moment, I had visions of me and Lucas standing out on the street with no one to pick us up!!!
So I guess it really doesn't matter whether you go private or public - I thought that private would be better and more courteous but (I'll give them a plug again!)
THE BIRRALEE BABES ARE THE BEST!!!!!!
Carly

[marinaW]

I am going into my 7th month of pregnancy. Unfortunately, I've had to be warded twice at the hospital... once public and the other private. In both cases, the midwives were excellent. And the mothers I met have not complained when using the two hospitals... So here you are mothers to be... if you've had bad midwife experiences... try the North Shore Public or North Shore Private hospitals. They have treated me so well that I am inspired to consider a career change in that direction. :D

[brideofjabba]

I was actually happy with my midwives. I had 1 to start with and then she went off duty and she was replaced with 2. They were great! But as my baby wasn't in the right birthing position(he was facing sideways instead of down) i was assessed by 2 drs, who didn't seem to know what they were doing! Eventually the midwives got another dr who was great! He eventually delivered my baby 17 hours after it all started.
What i wasn't happy at all with was the ward staff. I was told to take my ds temperature before every feed. They didn't give me a thermometer so i had to call someone to give me one. I did that and since the staff had changed during the night they had no idea what i was talking about and i was told that no i didn't need to take his temperature! What!!??? They did that the whole time, tell me something and then someone else would tell me that wasn't right and tell me something different. For a first time mum it was very confusing.
My ds was born in February and we were having some sort of heat wave, the hospital has no air conditioning in the ward!!!!We were drenched in sweat the whole time. Twice my ds was given a boiling hot bath. It was too hot for even me to put my hands in comfortably and he screamed the whole time. when i bathed him at home in normal temp water he didn't scream like he did there.
And when i was finally released they made me feel like i wouldn't be able to care for my baby. It was horrible. I really really don't want to deliver there again, but unfortuately i can't afford to go private :( and its the only public hospital near by.

[LilShenanigans]

I know I've only had one baby, but I'm very attuned the way midwives work (I grew up around them as another post says my mother is one) - btw, even though my mother can be a cow sometimes, she is a fantastic midwife! :)

But on her advice, I urge anyone who has been treated unfairly, rudely or with no respect to please lodge a complaint with the hospital - you could be helping someone else out there!

I know of a couple of midwives my mother warned me about, and if I was to be contacted by them I was told to treat THEM badly and tell them to stay the hell away from me!
I'm honestly quite an upfront person, so if I did get treated just slightly badly I reacted in turn - this usually makes midwives wise up or pass you onto someone better!

Even if you had your baby 6 years ago, it's never too late to complain! The way the system works within that small area is if a nurse/doctor/midwife gets enough complaints they will usually lose their job... but all complaints are investigated - even if you don't hear anything about them - it's all internal!

Oh and they have a record book that everything is in and passed on whenever they go to a new job. Fortunately, most don't know about the second - some think it's a bit of a myth actually lol But the second book contains EVERY detail, good bad whatever, things they don't want the 'owner' to read and can only be passed onto a new employment via employees.

Lastly, most of these stories are horrendous, and by the sounds of it some of the midwives will be standing on their last legs in that profession and just need another voice to push them over.
Oh, and speak up when your in labour. Some of you may be shy, but be it the only time in your life you can let those alter egos fly! And it's labour - have fun with it :p

[rebeccamum]

I gave birth to my daugther 3 month ago, the midwife was fastastic and I actually had a good experience of my labour even if it was an emergency ceasarean. Unfortunately, the good part seems to end there right at the operation theatre because once I was transfered to the recovery room the whole thing turned pretty ugly. My midwife was great but some nurses were nasty. I got treated pretty badly and this is a private hospital I'm talking about :eek:

The first night was a bit blury because I was on a lot of pain relief. I was hooked on several drips, a catheter and couldn't move my legs due to the epidural. The nasty bits kicked in on the second day when my baby cried for hours. She was hungry and my milk didn't come yet and no one offered any help, all they said was "you had a ceasarean so it will take a while for the milk to come." What? So you're gonna let my baby starve?? Just because I said that I wanted to breastfeed my baby so everyone only focused on the position, and didn't pay attention on my baby's clue. She was screaming because of hunger (I didn't know it at the time) but a nurse just make me rock the bassinet for hours and kept saying "All babies cry". I rocked her for hours and I had a ceasarean!!!

At night the baby cried again and when I rang the bell for a nurse, they came in and gave me a nasty look. At 2am I had to ask them to take my baby to the nursery room because I really needed to sleep, they woke me at 6am to go and bring my baby back myself. Boy, it's so difficult for them to bring my baby to my room?? I had a ceasarean for goodness'sake!!! I decided to come home on the 3rd day as I couldn't take it anymore but didn't forget to leave a complaint letter. A hospital officer rang the next day to apologise and I said to her "if these nurses feel disturbed because I asked for help, tell them to quit their job. What, they expect to just sit down and read a paper at night? They'd better be a security guard then".

Sorry about my rant, I just really needed to get it out.

[~beckkles~]

My bub arrived early but it still doesn't help with the situation I still to this day have flash backs.
My waters broke I was a private patient and admitted on NYE ( not my usual obst)
He did a scan and told me that he didn't want to do an internal because of infection..fair enough.
I was admitted and through the night midwife kept coming and checking temp for infection never bothered to look or check anything. At 5.55am I went to the toliet and felt funny came back to bed and it got the better of me so I went back and buzzed a midwife. 50 minutes later she arrived to find me on the toliet floor with my baby still attached due to placenta problems. (she had died) for all this time due to a staff changeover...Thankfully the women in the next room head me screaming!
Gotta love hospitals
Bec

[dee dee]

oh bec, what a sad story. Sending hugs to you, and warm wishes for the holiday season.

dee dee

[reAllytee]

~beckkles~ Your loss must be so heart stopping i could never imagine.
Sounds similar to a friend of mine .... makes me angry people are in jobs they shouldnt be in iykwim sometimes they need to listen to what us birthing mums have to say !
Im hoping that even though this time of year has bad memories that you also see the joy & happiness that there is also.
*hugs*