Post Natal Depression - Real or Imagined?

[Mischief]

Well I was having a discussion with some people the other day, and it seemed to me as though they felt that PND was just a cop out for NORMAL tiredness after having a baby.

As someone who has experienced it, I was rather hurt that people could feel that way. I wasnt just depressed, I was irrationally depressed. Suicidal, terrified of leaving the house, terrified of my husband leaving the house, everything was an effort, even simple things like brushing my teeth.

So I'd like to know what others perceive?

Is PND a real thing, or is it just an excuse that lazy women use to not take care of themselves?

[3 Little Pigs]

OMG :eek:.
Do people really feel like that??
They obviously didn't see 'insight' last week.

[Mischief]

I think it sad, since there is so much stigma involved with depression already.

It took me MONTHS to seek help. Because I felt as though I should have been able to suck it up.

[jag5000]

I have a family member (a few actually) with these thoughts. It's so sad and so frustrating.. and frankly downright insulting, that people have these attitudes! but they do :(

the only positive is that they must have been the lucky ones that haven't experienced PND.

I had AND and because no-one in my family had heard of it they were very unsupportive too.

It IS real Kat.. too real.. and the greatest thing is that you came out the other side :hugs:

[M O P]

going by what I felt physically at my down times,
def real
Kat, knowing part of what you've been through, I am so sorry you had to hear that

[whatwasithinking]

IT IS REAL!

For someone who has had it pre and post births and constantly for 7 years I will hunt down anyone who says it's imaginary!

[Angelmist♥]

Well for me, who was one day a happy-go-lucky person and the next a suicidal, paranoid, "wanted to live in my bed for eternity" person....I definitely believe it's real. Anyone who says otherwise is ignorant IMO.

[Deserama]

Oh it's real! Do they think that about depression too? Because PND is just that...depression. It just happens to hit after childbirth.

I wonder if they think that antidepressants somehow dampens our imaginations or something?

Gosh I thought these were outdated attitudes...are they from the older generation perhaps??

You might like print out some information from the internet for the next time someone craps on about it being a figment of your imagination...hand it to them and tell them that it's educate them because they clearly have no idea.

[workin'mumof2]

society really sucks in this area. but create a poll and you would be surprized.. (or maybe not) there are some people on here to dont believe its real..

im sorry but it is.

i am still suffering from rubys birth and really miss my old psychologist. because the ones here SUCK.

im constantly told to get over it

even from people who i think are close

i go through major spouts of it myself. one day i can be fine then the other i just get so upset seeing pregnant women or newborns. as you can imagine its hard to avoid.

but i am trying. and quite frankly it looks like im going to have to help myself as no professional here seams to think i should be suffering this long:(:thumbsdown:

[megaminz]

omg its so real I have seen friends go through it and there is no way they are bringing it on themselves...

I think for the grace of god only I narrowly missed out on having it myself, but perhaps I did have it in a small way.

I think the worst hting is other people really dont notice you going through it necessarily as a few of my friends who have had it still go out, smile and laugh but its all a facade, noone actually asks and really really cares if you are coping or not

[girly]

It's SO REAL! :gloomy:

[shockinamillion]

It is VERY real. My DP went from happy guy no problems for a good 5 years now to having thoughts of hurting himself, the babies, he was tired and cranky and did not want to do anything.

I was the same almost, fine all the way through the pregnancy and first 2 months and then bam, I cannot be happy or nice, or stop thinking about bad things. Sleeping constantly and not wanting to hold touch, or even look at my children. I did not want to be near them sometimes.

Oh those people are so freaking dumb!

[sweetsugardumplin']

To be honest, I think anyone who believes PND is imagined, has not experienced PND (and how lucky are they :yes:)

I remember reading (many years ago) an American Psychiatrist (male :rolleyes:) who proposed (and this was widely accepted) that PND was really latent psychosis that surfaced because the mother was not of strong character.

A disclosure of PND (although women rarely knew they were experiencing such a thing) or a diagnosis, resulted in non-voluntary admission to an asylum.

Women were seperated from their babies and family and subjected to a variety of treatments. (This would have included drug and electroconvulsive therapy :()

Once released, women were often labled as being `crazy' and were placed under the guardianship of their husbands (this power was often exploited and women were often threatened with re-admission if they were not compliant to their husband's demands :crying:

So women stopped telling their husbands, their Doctors, the MCHN , they stopped telling anyone how they were feeling for fear of having their basic rights (and their babies) taken away.

I believe the stigma of PND and the reluctance of women to disclose how they feel, stems from attitudes that have been carried through from this time.

Women say nothing because: they are so scared of having their babies taken away, they are so scared of being labeled as crazy and women are often told or are made to feel "Hey what have you got to be depressed about?.................you've got a healthy baby, you're paying off your house, you've got food in the cupboard, blah, blah, balh.....!"

Sorry, got a bit carried away there :o

PND is very real, and like whatwasithinking says: "I'll hunt anyone down who says it's imaginary!"

:hugs: to all those out there who have been affected by PND

[Whispers]

I've never actually experenced it so I wouldn't know. But I don't think it could be imaginary when there have been so many people who have been through it.

[mamajess]

Give me a break. PND is a real ILLNESS.

[Tam-I-Am]

Kind of 'no' (dont' shoot me yet).

PND is 'just' depression that happens to occur in the post-natal period. I don't really understand why it continues to be given it's own special categorisation - it's symptoms are exactly the same, it is diagnosed the same way and treated the same way to 'standard' depression. I guess it may be a little more socially acceptable to have PND than 'standard' depression.

But depression is definitely real, and new mothers are very vulnerable and can experience depression in the post-natal period, and that can be debilitating, definitely.

[Whispers]

Just thought I would add whilst I beleive it is real I do not believe it should be used as a excuse when you have harmed your child.

[sweetsugardumplin']

PND is 'just' depression that happens to occur in the post-natal period. I don't really understand why it continues to be given it's own special categorisation - it's symptoms are exactly the same, it is diagnosed the same way and treated the same way to 'standard' depression.

I always thought that the drop in certain hormones following pregnancy and birth produced similar symptoms to drug withdrawal.

With such a rapid decline in these hormones, women often experience feelings of helplessness, despair, sadness etc........because the depression that women experience is connected to pregnancy/birth (even though the tools for diagnosis and treatment are the same) then perhaps calling this type of depression PND illustrates it's connection to a life changing event and the implications this may have for the woman and her family..................just a thought ;) (Not as articulate as I used to be :o)

[Deserama]

Kind of 'no' (dont' shoot me yet).

PND is 'just' depression that happens to occur in the post-natal period. I don't really understand why it continues to be given it's own special categorisation - it's symptoms are exactly the same, it is diagnosed the same way and treated the same way to 'standard' depression. I guess it may be a little more socially acceptable to have PND than 'standard' depression.

But depression is definitely real, and new mothers are very vulnerable and can experience depression in the post-natal period, and that can be debilitating, definitely.

Yep that's what I said. I believe this to be true.

[Beckybug]

I can't believe people think its just a cop out for new Mum, FFS how insensitive can you get.

I haven't had kids so I don't know what its like, I have only had depression, but I have seen a few friends suffer PND to the point it almost cost their baby its life. IT'S A VERY REAL CONDITION!

[MumNeedsCoffee]

Kind of 'no' (dont' shoot me yet).

PND is 'just' depression that happens to occur in the post-natal period. I don't really understand why it continues to be given it's own special categorisation - it's symptoms are exactly the same, it is diagnosed the same way and treated the same way to 'standard' depression. I guess it may be a little more socially acceptable to have PND than 'standard' depression.

But depression is definitely real, and new mothers are very vulnerable and can experience depression in the post-natal period, and that can be debilitating, definitely.

I have suffered from depression pre-baby and postnatal depression and totally understand why PND is given it's own special categorisation.

Because their are tiny, vunerable babies involved.
Yes, it is just depression but with the added stresses of motherhood on top it can escalate to a critical situation very quickly.
It doesn't help when you're depressed and you have the overwhelming needs of an baby on top and exhaustion from lack of sleep.

For me it was depression x 10, it came on very quickly and got severe very quickly.

I'm so grateful that there is such a focus on Postnatal Depression.
I was referred to a specialist at the hospital during my pregnancy as I had a prior history of depression, although during my pregnancy I had never felt better.
The specialist came to see me at the maternity ward, where I was still ok and made follow up appointments at my home every week.

I called my family crying and begging for help and I was told that I was just experiencing the baby blues and I'll get over it.
I was told there is no such thing as depression, and it's just an excuse weak people use and I should just make myself be positive.

Due to this I didn't confide in the specialist the horrors I was experiencing. But there must have been certain signs that I wasn't coping and she kept making follow up appointments.

I started hallucinating about killing my baby and I was so scared I was about to lose touch with reality altogether and made a plan to take my own life to save my baby.
Thankfully I was taken off to the psychiatrict hospital and seperated from my baby.

[Mummita]

That is so offensive and ignorant! It's sad that there is still such a stigma attached to PND and other mental health illnesses.

[Deserama]

I always thought that the drop in certain hormones following pregnancy and birth produced similar symptoms to drug withdrawal.

With such a rapid decline in these hormones, women often experience feelings of helplessness, despair, sadness etc........because the depression that women experience is connected to pregnancy/birth (even though the tools for diagnosis and treatment are the same) then perhaps calling this type of depression PND illustrates it's connection to a life changing event and the implications this may have for the woman and her family..................just a thought ;) (Not as articulate as I used to be :o)

What you are decribing is the 3rd day blues. You feel like this for a day or two or three ;) But depression takes this further, it's ongoing :)

[Sheer Bliss]

Definately REAL, very, very real!

I do however think it might be one of those things that can be over diagnosed....being a new mum IS hard (As a mum of 4month old twins, a 2yo and 4o....i know, lol) and it can be overwhelming, exhausting and scary. Sometimes I think the 'normal' stuff that mums experience can be diagnosed as PND, when maybe they just need a good sleep and some more support. Not all cases though.....I do believe it is real, and can't imagine the pain of being there, let alone someone saying it's a cop-out :banghead: very rude.

[Tam-I-Am]

I have suffered from depression pre-baby and postnatal depression and totally understand why PND is given it's own special categorisation.

Because their are tiny, vunerable babies involved.
Yes, it is just depression but with the added stresses of motherhood on top it can escalate to a critical situation very quickly.
It doesn't help when you're depressed and you have the overwhelming needs of an baby on top and exhaustion from lack of sleep.

For me it was depression x 10, it came on very quickly and got severe very quickly.

I'm so grateful that there is such a focus on Postnatal Depression.
I was referred to a specialist at the hospital during my pregnancy as I had a prior history of depression, although during my pregnancy I had never felt better.
The specialist came to see me at the maternity ward, where I was still ok and made follow up appointments at my home every week.

I called my family crying and begging for help and I was told that I was just experiencing the baby blues and I'll get over it.
I was told there is no such thing as depression, and it's just an excuse weak people use and I should just make myself be positive.

Due to this I didn't confide in the specialist the horrors I was experiencing. But there must have been certain signs that I wasn't coping and she kept making follow up appointments.

I started hallucinating about killing my baby and I was so scared I was about to lose touch with reality altogether and made a plan to take my own life to save my baby.
Thankfully I was taken off to the psychiatrict hospital and seperated from my baby.

Don't get me wrong, I absolutely believe that new mums are extremely vulnerable. I've HAD post-natal depression - I've also treated lots of other women with PND (I"m a psychologist), but I've also treated many MANY people with depression - and PND is no better or worse than any other kind of depression, iykwim.

What you're describing (having hallucinations, losing touch with reality, etc) is actually more extreme than depression - it's moving toward post-partum psychosis, which is an emergency situation and is EXTREMELY important to get treatment for. I'm glad that you were able (eventually) to access the support and treatment you needed to recover.

[OneNowOneLater]

I believe that Post Natal Depression AND Pre Natal Depression are totally real. I've had them both.

There's nothing worse, while being pg and completely over it, and not having any physical control of your emotions or actions. At the time, i hated my friend and my bestie for dragging my @ss to the hospital, when i decided i'd had enough of being pg, and decided that i was gonna try and induce labour. Only, i used a hammer against my stomach.

I've only been able to talk about my PND and PreNatal Depression for about 6 months now, and this is the first time i've spoken about it on here. I dont know how many times i've almost written it here on BH.

Now, whoever says that PND and PreNatal Depression arent real, try going through that!

[MumNeedsCoffee]

Tam-I-Am: I agree with you that all depression needs to be taken seriously.
I had a friend who commited suicide because of depression related to a relationship breakdown.

I also think there are certain factors that can cause depression to escalate into a serious situation much more quickly.
I know many people who due to severe financial difficulties have suffered depression and also made plans to take their own lives, and thankfully got help.

I had postnatal depression which within a matter of weeks progressed into postnatal psychosis.

So if there are known factors such as the prenatal and postpartum period which can cause severe depression then it it should be given special attention.


I once read an article that said that the reason why people may not be taken as seriously now when discussing depression is because to say you're feeling depressed has become commonplace.
Eg. "It's so depressing that it's rained all week"
So to alot of people feeling depressed just means you're just not feeling happy that day.

[MumNeedsCoffee]

And also the other difference in this situation of depression is that their is a child involved who is very vunerable and forming her impressions of the world.

I'm being treated by a perinatal pyschiatrist who not only treats me but is very observant of my very young daughter and how her behaviour are developing and are affected due to this traumatic time.

[Mischief]

I have to agree with Tami about the logistics of it all, but at the same time I know PND was/is worse than the depression I struggle with on a daily basis.

I wasn't just depressed and thinking that maybe things would be better off without me. I was CONVINCED that my children would be better off without me. Some how there was a tiny little rational part of my brain that kept telling me to hold it together.

How do we go about educating people that PND/Depression is real?! Its not just something you shake off, you aren't a whiner and a complainer for being down (I get this distinct impression often). There is such a huge stigma attached to it.

[Mischief]

Oh and to all of you who have been brave enough to share your stories, thank you! :hugs: Its nice to know you arent alone.

[Angelmist♥]

I wasn't just depressed and thinking that maybe things would be better off without me. I was CONVINCED that my children would be better off without me. Some how there was a tiny little rational part of my brain that kept telling me to hold it together.


:hugs:That was definitely the most difficult thing to overcome for me. I too was CONVINCED that my children and husband would be better off without me. I was 100% sure that people (friends/family) were saying I couldn't cope at motherhood behind my back. It's not a fleeting thought :(

To anyone who has ever been through it or is going through it, I wish you all the love and peace in the world :hugs:

[sweetsugardumplin']

What you are decribing is the 3rd day blues. You feel like this for a day or two or three ;) But depression takes this further, it's ongoing :)


I do know the difference between the two ;)