Do you leave bubs with your Other half overnight?

[Just Add Water]

For those of you who aren't comfortable leaving your babies with someone else overnight does this include your partner? Have you ever had a night, or even a full day where you went out and left your partner to do it all?

I don't even hesitate to leave DS (or the older three) with his father. I go to early markets with a girlfriend and leave him to tend to all 4, I've gone away for a weekend and left them all at home. I don't see it as any different from him going out or away and me being at home with the kids (obviously if you're breastfeeding exclusively then this is different, I understand that).

Just curious :D

[Mrs Nietzsche]

I am struggling with this right this second. DH wants to take DS (will be 15 mths) to see his family in Sydney for a night. But they are really boisterous and there's about 12 people living in one house etc. I just feel really uncomfortable with it.

For the night just here would be totally fine though, I often go to the movies or whatever (htere's been no call for me to go overnight).

DH will be taking DS through the night once the new baby arrives.

[traseal]

I BF and also the bread winner in our family so DF has DS full time at home. He does wonderfully!! I have nor problems leaving him and i love sharing the parenting 50/50!! And they have a really close bond which is grat too.
I cant leave him with anyone at nights though, he gets very up-set at night time if he wakes and im not there....but i dont mind

[kar]

Yep, aside from the BF issue don't even think about it. Haven't done all night but just last week I went out for dinner with my friends after giving F his dinner milk.

He is just as capable as I am of looking after him aside from boobies. Things may not get done precisely how I would do it and the house might look like a bomb site when I get back but a small price to pay for some time out and he likes having time alone with F.

[Boobycino]

I haven't left bubba with his dadda over night, but I have gotten roaring drunk on 2 occasions in the last 10 months and so I consider those times that DP was 'on his own' because I was having some me time.

DP has also taken bub with him out for the day, or I've gone out for the day.

I haven't had the oportunity to, but if it came up I'd leave DP and bub overnight, no problems!

(I've seriously considered grabbing a hotel room, getting a late check out and just having a good nights sleep!)

[Areca]

Yep absolutely. As soon as they are able to go a decent stretch of time without needing a bf then Dh takes all the kids somewhere.

I'm going away this weekend and leaving DH at home with the kids. I'll be three hours away and it's the first time I won't have DD2 overnight but I have no hesitation in going....DH is a fantastic father! I trust him with the kids 100%....if I didn't I wouldn't have had kids with him.

[kar]

(I've seriously considered grabbing a hotel room, getting a late check out and just having a good nights sleep!)


Chel me too! When we were on 'holiday' in the US at one point I was very serious about getting myself a different room, telling DH to give F a bottle and to leave me alone from 7pm to 7am. It still sounds pretty good.

[Me]

DD1 no prob, DD2 is exclusively bf, so wont be apart anytime soon. i left DD2 with dh for about an hour though when i got my first tooth pulled about 3 weeks ago and he struggled and she was upset so I think that's a definate sign that the 2 of them aren't ready to be left without me just yet.

[MothersMilk]

I haven't left DD with DH alone over night but he has taken DD for the day.
If i have an assignment due or i'm studying for an exam or even if i'm just stressed and need time out DH will happily take DD for a day out.
He is a great father and i have no problem with him looking after DD without me. They always have fun together and i am a happier mum after some space (or sleep) sometimes. :D

[Wookie1]

I need to do this more often, we are only at 11 weeks but I do trust him just haven't really taken advantage yet. Funnily enough I have left him with MIL for a few hours and my mum with no hastle.

Must give it a go.

[Rydens Mummy]

Well i must be the odd one in the group. Ds has never been left with DP for mre then 15mins. Its just worked out that way with DP work. He is gone before DS wake and is back whe DS is in Bed, On his days off we are running around after DSS. DP admits that he would never remember to feed change or even give him a nap. So i dont bother leaving DS with him. This has been an issue between us, because i feel DSS is getting favoured, etc etc, and i dont feel comfortable knowing that my babies needs will not be met. I can not and will not leave my son with ANYONE knowing that his basic need will not be meet. So untill DS is able to tell his dad that he is hungry thirsty etc, he will not be left with him for any extended period of time. Mind you I have only le DS for a total of about 4 hours his enitre life.

[Bunnyhugs]

Yep DS has been left with DH over night - not very often though because usually if I need someone to have him overnight, it's because DH and I are doing something together.

[MsMummy]

I BF and also the bread winner in our family so DF has DS full time at home. He does wonderfully!! I have nor problems leaving him and i love sharing the parenting 50/50!! And they have a really close bond which is grat too.
I cant leave him with anyone at nights though, he gets very up-set at night time if he wakes and im not there....but i dont mind

We're exactly the same, except my partner studies as well so we use part time FDC.

He's just as capable as I am.

I don't know if I could leave the baby all night though as he gets very distressed when he wakes up in the middle of the night with no boobs!:D

[~Temet Nosce~]

He has been left with dd for a few hours at night after shes gone to bed and I've gone out, but I've always been back to get her up in the morning.
That's not to say I wouldn't though, I'm sure he would manage fine and the need for it just hasn't come up yet. The only reason I'd feel weird about it is because I am yet to not be there in the morning when she wakes up and I'd miss her :p

[Sheer Bliss]

DH always has our kids....overnight if need be (not happened since I finished work though). I trust him completely. He hasn't had the twins alone overnight, and won't for a while as last time I was gone for a few hrs in the day, they both refused the bottle, and since they both wake overnight still, they need me at the moment.

[angel_cakesau]

i leave my kids with dh all the time i need a break too i am in this house 24/7 practically except for shopping and stuff but the kids come with me

dh lets me go out every few weeks

[CaelsMum]

I guess I'm also an odd one out as DH is almost like another child and needs to be told to do everything (it drives me mad). He also doesn't cope too well with our 3 yr old DS and has little patience. Even when left for short periods of time he will forget what needs to be done with them so for everyone's sanity I don't.

[Hollywood]

I haven't yet stayed away overnight (the need hasn't arisen yet), but when the time comes I have no problems with leaving DS with DH. I work for 5 hrs each Saturday and DH stays home with DS, and I know that I don't have to worry about a thing :thumbsup:

[workin'mumof2]

i cant. dd still breastfeeds during the night and will refuse a bottle.

during the day i have tried. the other day i walked out the door to go to a placement interview for my study and ruby screamed her head off and took 45mins to settle. if i had walked back in i wouldnt have made it in time to the family day care:crying: it broke my heart. lets just say she was happy to see me when i got home.

im more then happy to leave dh with ds as he copes better with him then i do:gloomy::shame:

[ontheway]

We both haven't yet stayed away overnight (the need hasn't arisen yet), but when the time comes I have no problems with leaving DS with his God -parents or each other.

[*Chels*]

I leave the kids with DH when I go out at night but have only spent one night away in 4 years.(Have been breastfeeding for 3 1/2 of those years)
I am going to Sydney for a weekend in March,kid free!!2 whole nights away from the children which I have never done and will probably miss them dreadfully.Or else I will be so drunk I wont even know;):laughing:

[smog]

id leave my older 2 with dh but not bubba who is 16 months. mostly beacuase i am selfish and cant stand to be away from my boy for long and also because he is a total mummies boy (most likely due to me smothering him to death:laughing:) longest i leave him with dh would prob be about 3 hours? if on the rare occassion i go shopping or something and dh is home. dh is more than capable but he works long hours so isnt here a lot and i just prefer to be with my bubba all the time at this stage

[FionaV]

Except for the boob thing (which we are past), no problem at all. He's the parent as well, after all, and nobody would bat an eyelid if he went away overnight and left me with the mob. Fair's fair.

[kar]

Fionav I completely agree, it always strikes mr as strange when mums refer to their partners as babysitting. I know one family who get a baby sitter the night the mum
goes to uni because the dad can't look after the two kids for the evening on
his own.

[Gabi]

I can honestly say it's never occured to me.

If I'm going away for the night without DS, I want DH to come :D

[Gabi]

it always strikes mr as strange when mums refer to their partners as babysitting.
:iagree:

If DH is 'babysitting' while I go out to run errands, then I 'babysit' all day while he's at work.:laughing: You can't babysit your own child, you parent them.

[BabelFish]

Haven't read the whole thread but yes, absolutely I would. We parent absolutely equally in every way, including time spent and every, single duty.

So, even though there's never been any call for me to go anywhere overnight away from DP, I would leave our daughter with him without a second thought. He is just as good at being her parent as I am! I'm very lucky that my DP has been so hands-on, and so in love with her, and so involved as a parent - 50/50 and often even more especially when I'm tired. I know that it isn't that way for everyone.

[bumMum]

yer I do it all the time! i work evenings and sometimes I go to a friends party or something like that.. no issues here... when he was very young, say the first 3 months, I can't recall ever doing it.. my mum had him once over night when me and DP went out for my birthday! and I was really nervous and he was a boob baby all the way but it went o.k... it's not that I didn't trust DP, I just felt like.. I dunno.. he wouldn't be as good at it as a woman.. which is terrible.. it took me a while to realize he was fantastic parent, but he just has a different style to me.. it always horrified me he would have the baby fall asleep in his arms in bed.. I could never do that.. and he used to jiggle him to sleep, I never liked that.. but I have learnt to let go :)

I also find it weird when people refer to the father as " babysitting" I only think of a babysitter as someone besides mum and dad.. I find it annoying some men are unable to "babysit" their own children.. ARGH

[jag5000]

yep.. have done and will again

last time was a couple of weeks back when I took DD to canberra to go to the homebirth rally. DS was at home with DH for 2 nights.. and was sick as with gastro! poor guy. I only felt bad as I know DH has a big problem with vomit! :D

[PeppaH]

I wouldnt when DS was just a wee bubba, but now no problem. Only because I know and so does DF what he can manage and a little tike isnt one of those things :p

[updaduff]

i agree Kar about the term 'babysitting'. We used to say it a lot and then one day i was in a bad mood :rolleyes: and snapped at DH saying 'he is your son - you are not doing me a service you are doing your fatherly duties." So now its called being on baby duty :D my poor DH having to put up with me!!

Any way back to OP. DS is only 3mths and breastfed exclusively. so i havent spent an entire night away yet. I have stayed out with friends for dinner/coffee until 1am though. and since DS sleeps his first block of sleep from 7:30pm - 3am i feel absolutely no guilt in doing it. DH doesnt even have to do any thing (only check on the bub for me every time i ring:D)

I love the idea about hiring a hotel room to get some good sleep. knowing me though, i'll probably wake every hour wondering why its so quiet (DH snores).

[Just Add Water]

It's good to see the couples who parent equally! I understand if you're breastfeeding then it makes leaving bubs an unrealistic option for more than a short while, but I have to admit that I don't understand why it's such a fuss for some people to leave their kids with their partners... I really don't get it. Surely you make them together you parent them together?

[Angelmist♥]

Absolutely! If I didn't think he would be a good parent, I wouldn't have had 3 children with him haha.

[Lilyloo]

DD is 2.3 years, I'm not still breastfeeding, but still haven't left her alone with anyone during the day or night, including DH.

It's nothing to do with him. I'm sure he's 100% capable, just something I haven't felt comfortable doing just yet.

[Lilyloo]

Surely you make them together you parent them together?


That makes sense, but I also think it has a lot to do with the child. My DD has always been very clingy and needy, very mummy, mummy.... Not so close to daddy (mind you he works 6 days a week, and I'm with her 24/7, so this may have something to do with it) I would just hate to think she was scared, crying and worried about where I was if I left her for a whole night.