Not Coping with a Strong Willed Child

[kimcam]

Hi There,

I have a DD who is 3 yrs 3 mnths on Friday and finding it really really stressful and find myself constantly yelling.

Every morning when getting DD dressed ready for playgroup, preschool or whatever else she tells me "no I do not want to and tells me to go away" and starts hitting out if I start getting her dressed.

If I tell DD off for climbing on the furniture or throwing toys around she says go away mummy go away. I put DD in her room to calm down but it only makes matters worse.

Today I went to the drs and DD did not want the puppy dog lead on and did refused to walk and told me to go away. DD wanted to be picked up but I said no I cannot pick you up as I am pregnant 34 weeks.

I am finding I am getting rather frustrated and yelling at DD constantly. To make matters worse my mum told me I am not firm enough with her.

If anyone has any suggestions I am desperate for some advise.

Kim
DH
DD - 3 yrs 3mnths
D? - due 26 October

[sockstealingpoltergeist]

Hi There,

I have a DD who is 3 yrs 3 mnths on Friday and finding it really really stressful and find myself constantly yelling.

Every morning when getting DD dressed ready for playgroup, preschool or whatever else she tells me "no I do not want to and tells me to go away" and starts hitting out if I start getting her dressed.

If I tell DD off for climbing on the furniture or throwing toys around she says go away mummy go away. I put DD in her room to calm down but it only makes matters worse.

Today I went to the drs and DD did not want the puppy dog lead on and did refused to walk and told me to go away. DD wanted to be picked up but I said no I cannot pick you up as I am pregnant 34 weeks.

I am finding I am getting rather frustrated and yelling at DD constantly. To make matters worse my mum told me I am not firm enough with her.

If anyone has any suggestions I am desperate for some advise.

Kim
DH
DD - 3 yrs 3mnths
D? - due 26 October
:hugs: Things can be overwhelming when we are pregnant.

Just remember she is just trying to test the boudries and is no worse then most three year olds.:)

With my DS I just try and remain calm, and I still use a lot of distraction. If he doesn't want to get dressed I make a sock into a puppet and put on a silly voice or something like that.

I also like to explain why we are doing what we are doing, so I am not just demanding he does things, and I also try to provide choices "which shoes do you want to wear, the green ones or the blue ones?"

If DS doesn't want to walk, I take the pram and then I say, either you have to walk or hop in the pram. If he throws a wobbly I just put him in the pram and if I don't give in he knows he can choose, but that I won't carry him.

If she is rude to you, I would say something like, "It's not nice to be rude to mummy, I can't talk to you untill you speak nicely" then walk away.

That's just some of the things I do. :hugs: Good luck.

[reAllytee]

Yep this is the age the 'attitude' comes out ... They become even more egoccentric if thats possible & strong willed in that they want 'power' so to speak ...

And all of thats ok :yes:

Learning to embrace their strengths & their determination will help ... Honestly it does !

Also at this age because they want more 'power' its a great time to start allowing them more so allowing her to dress herself, even if that means mistmatched outfits & shoes on the wrong feet.

They havent got much they can control in this world cause all us big people run it ;) so just give in to a few things that can allow her to feel like she has a say will have her back off fighting you on everything.

My now 4.5yr old is VERY strong willed ... He drives me mental but I love to bits the fact that he is who he is & I would never want to change him for the world ( although its tempting at times :cool: ).

A few things we now do are :


He dresses himself & chooses what that outfit is.

He brushes his teeth & washes his face as needed.

I now allow him to pretty much get his brekky & lunch organised as well as his little brothers ( got a great step stool from IKEA that he can use as needed around the kitchen ! ).

I have also given him 'responsibilites' ( clearing up toys at set times & helping with certain cleaning taskes ) so that he feels important & does his chores as needed.

He also gets a say in setting the weekly meal menu so that he cant throw a total hissy fit over it iykwim !


I started a lot of these when he was around 3yrs btw ...


Oh & have a look in this area at 'The Padded Cell' loads of us are all in there willing to offer support !