Waking 3 hourly at night for feeds (7 months)

[bublie]

I was hoping for some suggestions to our problem.
7 months old bubs is sleeping well during the day, self settling for the most part at bedtime BUT is waking every 3 or 4 hours in the night wanting a feed.
Once she cries theres no consoling her other than with a feed (after which she promptly returns to sleep). We've tried giving her a drink of water, letting her cry, using self settling techniques ...but to no avail - she's insisting on a feed.

Im fairly sure that by now she no longer needs the additional milk, and I fear this is now just a bad habit thats being going on since birth and I'm having trouble fixing it
Has anyone had a similar problem with a successful outcome, or any suggestions ??

Many thanks

[kar]

no solution, but we are exactly the same, F is 6.5 mths. He has his 'long' sleep from 7 through to around midnight then it is is 2 - 3 hourly after than and up before 6am.
I don't really know what to do.

I think one and even two feeds at say 11 and 4 would be OK, but 12, 2.30, 4.30 and up at 5.30/6 is ridiculous.

And he really just has a few sips at at least one of those so it is just habit for us.

[wocket]

she probably does need the milk if water isn't doing the trick. shes at an age thats getting ready for the next growth spurt.

[JiminyCricket]

No solution sorry My 13 month old does the same he goes through phases each couple of weeks sometimes sleeping hours and other times only for an hour at a time.
I just keep him in bed with me to make life easier.

[lupa]

Hi Ladies,
Once you bubs wakes what sort of cry is it? If it's just a night winge you could try leaving them, most often they'll go back to sleep. If it's a real cry then that's different. What are you doing with solids? are you on 3 meals a day?

[kar]

For us it generally is just a whinge but he will keep whinging for up to half an hour at which point it becomes a real cry. He rarely if ever falls back to sleep when i leave him - just gets more difficult to settle with or without boob.

We are having 3 full meals a day, incorporating protein (lentils in one and ricotta/yoghurt the other) into two of those and have been for a while now. Might start on some chicken this week.

Caladenia, have tried that too, he thinks it is play time. I do sometimes (like this morning) get a bit more sleep out of him after 5am with this tactic.

This has been his basic pattern since he was a newborn - it was pretty good for a newborn but not so good for a 6 mth old! During growth spurts he adds in an extra feed early in the night and has good feeds at each overnight.

TBH I have been too lazy to really have a good crack at breaking the habit, but I am thinking of implementing a 10.30 dreamfeed then going on strike between 11pm and 6 am for a couple of weeks and seeing if it breaks the habit. I don't think 7 hrs is unreasonable at this stage given how much food he is having along with milk x 4 at least during the day.

[bublie]

Much like others have described its a whinge for about 30 mins until it becomes a cry if unattended.

Thinking about trying some CC to see if this habit can be broken. :hair:

[littlechomper]

My DD went through this same thing! I got to the point after 2 months of not much sleep and demand feeding around the clock a friend got me onto a book.. I followed the set breast feeding, solids and sleep routine and within 1 day i had a content bub and she decided to sleep through the night and has ever since...
What i worked was i wasn't feeding her enough during the day.. Then she would always wake up during the night for top ups!!
first DD i did the CC. But this time around i have never needed it.. What ever works for you though.. Good luck

[lou333]

My DD1 did 4 hourly feeds day and night from 3 or 4 months. I kept waiting for her to change the pattern herself but she didn't! Ended up doing controlled crying at 10.5 months which worked - probably should have done it sooner, but didn't have the heart to!

[kar]

Did you do the cc as in when Bub woke you took it from there each time? I have thought about it (but don't have the heart yet) but it seems like something for getting sleep to me rAther than frequent waking. I don't think he is going to give up one on his own though

[lou333]

It was a while ago now, but I'm pretty sure every time she woke up I let her cry for a bit, then went in and gave her a pat and dummy and let her go for longer intervals 3 mins, then 5, 10 or whatever I felt she and I could manage. Not fun! It took maybe 3-5 nights I think. Hope you figure something out.

[mum2bubba]

Could you maybe feed her a bit more during the day in hopes she won't get hungry over night? Is she actually hungry or just looking to suck on something?

[kar]

Right, I'm over it! Last night feed at 12, awake for an hour, woke at 3.30 screaming for milk. Up for another hour. 5.45 time to get up for the day.

Spoke to my mchn yesterday (who i have a great r'ship with, she has been a god send) about what to do with a bub who is having 3 good meals a day, and still feeding 2-3 times overnight and refusing to go back to sleep after feeds. She laughed and said "stop feeding him at 4am and shout out 'there's no milk go back to sleep!'". She is absolutely right. She did say to expect at least 3 nights of very hard going, so you have to be in the right frame of mind, but I have had enough.

Starting tonight, milk at about 11 and then the milk bar is bloody closed until 6am! Cuddles yes, milk no for the first three nights. I'm not going into him until he is actually really getting upset. Shouting out will not get me out of bed.
Will reassess after three nights. If going reasonably will start with trying to leave him in the cot. Am also not going to bring him into our bed in the vain hope he will go back to sleep.

So, I'm in for at least 3 days of torture, but hopefully we can crack this one!

[nick's mum]

I had a similar problem - bub put himself to sleep at night and for day sleeps but was still waking every few hours during the night (more frequently from 3am). At first I tried refusing to feed pushing it back 1/2 and hour each night, reducing how much the night feeds were (by 30ml each night or by minutes if you are breastfeeding), giving water instead (would drink a full bottle of water). In the end decided no matter what I would not feed until morning. I patted, rubbed his back etc to resettle - if he wasn't responding I would leave for 5 minutes and then return and reassure him but would not pick him up or feed, this went on for 1 hour - then he just stopped and went back to sleep - he then woke again at about 4am and I did the same - and within 1/2 hour he went back to sleep on his own. He has slept through 11-12 hours a night ever since - he was 8 months then is now 10 months. We've had the occasional night wake up when he's had a cold but that's all. Also, don't go in unless baby is actually crying - not just talking/whinging a bit. That 1 night was hard but he has slept really well ever since (well he fights day sleeps more than he used to but i'd prefer that to fighting night sleep).

[kar]

So, implemented new mean mummy plan last night. Gave him milk at 11, woke at 3.30 but put himself back to sleep. Woke at 4..20, talking to him self, started to get grumpier at around 4.30 so I went in. He settled in the cot remarkably easily but just couldn't get off to sleep. He would settle and I would leave, he would start doing a few shouts etc, be quiet for about 10 mins then work himself up. Repeat. At 5.45 he started to really lose it so I gave him milk (I thought an hour was long enough and it was almost 6, his designated milk time) and he went back to sleep. Got him up at 7. He is perfectly cheerful today so it obviously didn't bother him too much!

It is a bit of a tricky one - I think if I had sat in his room with him he would have probably gone back to sleep, but I guess we want him to be able to sleep himself, not have me sit next to him! The 2, 4, 6 thing (Robin Barker CC method which many people have told me worked for them in 3 nights) didn't really work because he didn't start crying straight away. F will cry for a minute, then be quiet for 3, cry for another minute, quiet for two until he works into proper crying. Wasn't sure whether the strategy is to do the 2, 4, 6 regardless of how long the gap has been between crying bouts. In fact, until 5.45 he never really worked into proper crying, just shouting at me.

Will see what happens tonight.

[lou333]

Hey Kar - It sounds like it went pretty well for your first night :yes: I think you're doing the right thing. I have a friend who has an 18 month old who BF twice a night and it would be so much harder to break the habit at that age as they're more aware, demanding and persistent. Your little one will forget about it all after a few days. Good luck.

[Roxybond]

For us it generally is just a whinge but he will keep whinging for up to half an hour at which point it becomes a real cry. He rarely if ever falls back to sleep when i leave him - just gets more difficult to settle with or without boob.

We are having 3 full meals a day, incorporating protein (lentils in one and ricotta/yoghurt the other) into two of those and have been for a while now. Might start on some chicken this week.

Caladenia, have tried that too, he thinks it is play time. I do sometimes (like this morning) get a bit more sleep out of him after 5am with this tactic.

This has been his basic pattern since he was a newborn - it was pretty good for a newborn but not so good for a 6 mth old! During growth spurts he adds in an extra feed early in the night and has good feeds at each overnight.

TBH I have been too lazy to really have a good crack at breaking the habit, but I am thinking of implementing a 10.30 dreamfeed then going on strike between 11pm and 6 am for a couple of weeks and seeing if it breaks the habit. I don't think 7 hrs is unreasonable at this stage given how much food he is having along with milk x 4 at least during the day.
I have the same problem with my currently teething 7 month old DS. For the last 2 nights, he's taken 2.5hrs to get to sleep after waking for a feed at 2am. He'll feed really well, so I put him back to bed and he either cries/grizzles straight away or sucks his thumb. It then goes quiet for 30-50 minutes then he starts up again.

I'm ignoring the grizzling and only respond when it becomes real crying but once I go in and pat his bottom, he quietens down so I leave, then either a few minutes later or another 30-50 minutes later, it starts all over again. Last night, I finally got him to sleep on his side after 2.5hrs of this (I also let him cry for a bit to see). He's not hungry, wet, cold, hot or anything else and I'm not sure if it's his teeth coming through or him trying to keep me nearby, but it's killing me!!!!!

He's just started sleeping on his tummy so not sure if he's still getting used to that, but even if he's on his tummy, back or side (where he used to love sleeping), I can't get him to stay asleep beyond me leaving the room after settling him like he used to.

He's never done this before, he's always fed and gone straight back to sleep in the middle of the night, I'm at a loss to figure it out.

Any ideas???

[kar]

well, since i turned the tap off felix has been sleeping through to around 5am after a feed at 11, so much much better.

second night he woke twice and went back to sleep after around 10 - 15 mins with no crying, just a few shouts etc then slept to 5.45.

third night slept straight through to 5.45.

fourth night he sleopt to 5.30 and i fed him and he went back to sleep until 6.45

last night he woke at 4.55 started yelling at 5.15 - see a pattern here?? so i didn't feed him and tried to resettle him until 6.15 when i fed him and he went back to sleep until 7.15.

so, if you are confident it is just a habit waking rather than anything else maybe just try not feeding him for a couple of nights and see if it helps?

obviously F is now trying it on with waking earlier and earlier (he has always been an early riser, we rarely make it beyond 6) so i am going to try and just do the same thing for a few days and see if he goes back to sleeping until around 6.

hmm, sorry, just reread your post and you aren't feeding him, in that case i have no idea - i always fed F when he woke. i don't know if you are open to it, but i know a lot of people who have had quick and lasting success with the 2, 4, 6 CC method once they were sure baby was waking out of habit rather than hunger. I was all psyched up to do it (after having been very anti-CC) but he didn't need it.

[sharonnscotty]

OOoooo I love love this thread, CONGRATS mummies !! Hope your little ones sleep through !! I will keep this in mind for a few months time LOL

[whiteroses]

This is all very encouraging. Well done, Kar. I think I will follow your lead and close the milk bar between midnight and 6ish for my 10-mth-old, and here's hoping he does as well as Felix!

Roxybond, our little one was very similar while he was teething. He used to just go back to sleep after a feed, but we went through a month or two where he was really wakeful from about 3.30 or 4-6ish. I was at my wits' end not knowing what to try. I ended up bringing him into bed with us and we usually got a bit of sleep that way. Then, for no known reason, he just grew out of it. I don't think it was anything I did. I think it was just a (painful for us) phase he went through. That probably doesn't help much...

[Roxybond]

This is all very encouraging. Well done, Kar. I think I will follow your lead and close the milk bar between midnight and 6ish for my 10-mth-old, and here's hoping he does as well as Felix!

Roxybond, our little one was very similar while he was teething. He used to just go back to sleep after a feed, but we went through a month or two where he was really wakeful from about 3.30 or 4-6ish. I was at my wits' end not knowing what to try. I ended up bringing him into bed with us and we usually got a bit of sleep that way. Then, for no known reason, he just grew out of it. I don't think it was anything I did. I think it was just a (painful for us) phase he went through. That probably doesn't help much...
Thankfully, those really wakeful nights seem to have passed and I think it was his teeth that were really worrying him because it's not like him to be that worked up in the middle of the night. The last 2 nights have seen a return to 1 waking with a feed at 1 or 2am (I don't even try to settle him because he seems genuinely hungry) that's over in 25 minutes and straight back to bed until 7am, which is how it always used to be.

I really have to learn to relax and go with the flow rather than trying to diagnose every little change!!! Now that I've said this, things will probably go pear shaped again, but at least I'll relax a bit more!!!!!

As it turns out, he has 3 teeth coming at once (2 on top and 1 more on the bottom to go with the 1 on the bottom already through). Poor little guy was probably really uncomfortable.

Thanks so much

[MrsTiggyWinkle]

Perhaps this is too late if you have already found a solution, but with my DD1, we gradually reduced the nighttime feeds over 2 weeks or so. It worked cos she was bottle-fed, not sure if you are breast or bottle.

Anyway one night we put in 2 scoops instead of 3, then a few nights later reduced the water, then a couple of nights later put in 1 scoop, etc. She just gave up waking and it was relatively painless on us all - I guess she figured it wasn't worth waking up for a drink of water! And by cutting it down gradually, she gradually picked up the extra calories in the day.