Spinoff's Spinoff

[CrankyAndTired]

In regards to non-custodial parents paying child support, what do you think about the rights that come with that responsibility??

Should any man paying child support (forced or voluntarily) be given visitation/shared custody if he wants it?

Do rights and responsibilities always go hand in hand?

[Whispers]

everyman should have the right to see his child unless he has been abusive towards that child.
IMO I think it is selfish of the mother to deny the child of knowing and contacting there bio father simply because she dislikes him or he was abusive to her ect;

[SassyMummy]

Sure, I think they should be granted access.

In a way, I am glad DDs father has chosen to not play much of a role in her life. He moved overseas and gives her a phonecall once every 3-4 weeks. She cries that she misses him, and I hate it... but in a way, I feel that it means she can bond with DP if she wants to (and she does), and not feel bad about it.

It makes my life easier, and I believe that in the long term, it will make hers easier too.

If he comes back into her life in 5 years and wants full access though, I can tell you right now that I'll not be pleased. I don't need DD to be stuffed around because he cannot make up his mind.

[Jakois]

IMO I think that every child has a right to know both parents, unless there is a history of violence/abuse of any form involved.

In regards to paying Child Support = Rights to the child, the question cannot be answered correctly for there are to many variables.

[Deserama]

Thank you Jakois, I was going to say the same thing. :)

It's not about the rights of the father...it's about the child. What are the child's rights? Every child has the right to know their own father (unless he's abusive etc).

[CrankyAndTired]

There are a lot of variables involved, so I'm interested in people's take on the issue.

I agree, first and foremost are the children's rights.. to know their parents, to have a safe loving environment, to have emotional consistency in their lives..

I guess I wonder where the child's right to a consistent emotional environment more important than their right to know both parents? I dont have an answer to this, its obviously case by case but there has to be some boundaries in place?!

My nephew's father was recently granted visitation after 2 years of pretending my sister wasnt pregnant, refusing to put his name of the birth certificate for months, talking about killing both my sister and my nephew... but now he wants to be part of his son's life.

My nephew does have the right to know both his parents.. but in this situation it does seem that that his father's right to know his son has come before his son's right to an emotionally consistent, perhaps even safe, environment..

Obviously a complex issue!

[Deserama]

Ah yes but see...in that instance, if they had a smart judge, then the visitation would start off being for a few hours at a time and slowly build on that while the child gets used to his father.

[Mathermy]

In regards to non-custodial parents paying child support, what do you think about the rights that come with that responsibility??

Should any man paying child support (forced or voluntarily) be given visitation/shared custody if he wants it?

Do rights and responsibilities always go hand in hand?

I believe so yes, unless there is neglect and/or abuse involved etc.

I also agree with a PP who said that a poor relationship between the two parents should not be used as an excuse to deny access, however I disagree that a parent who abuses another should have access to his/her child.

I think when a parent abuses the other parent it harms a child in ways that we cannot even comprehend . Regardless abuse/assault etc is illegal, and I do not believe parents who don't posess the self control not to harm other human beings should have children under their care, unless and until they learn and prove that they are capable of self control and appropriate behaviour.

[SorenLorensen]

child support should be paid as it is in the best interest for the child, it helps the custodial parent raise them.

visitation should be based on what is in the best interest of the child.

a person can pay $20,000 a week for a kid for all i care, im not going to say because of that he has rights to see him or her.....money paid does not mean the child should have to undergo visitation that would not have a positive outcome.

[sockstealingpoltergeist]

Firstly no mother or father has any rights- it is the child that has the right to see their parents if it's in their best interest.

Monetary support and visitation have nothing to do with each other. Some men/ women claim not to be able to see their children so they shouldn't have to pay child support, when they havn't even tried.

If a father is doing no harm to his children then of course he should have visitation. I do not think fathers should have automaticaly have 50% care, because the majority of care of children before relationship breakdowns is still done by women. it would be unfair to take a children away from what they know to suit a parents needs. A father (or mother) can still be a very active parent without 50% visitation.

[reAllytee]

Firstly no mother or father has any rights- it is the child that has the right to see their parents if it's in their best interest.

Monetary support and visitation have nothing to do with each other. Some men/ women claim not to be able to see their children so they shouldn't have to pay child support, when they havn't even tried.

If a father is doing no harm to his children then of course he should have visitation. I do not think fathers should have automaticaly have 50% care, because the majority of care of children before relationship breakdowns is still done by women. it would be unfair to take a children away from what they know to suit a parents needs. A father (or mother) can still be a very active parent without 50% visitation.

:iagree:

Whilst things are difficult between my ex & I at this point in time there is no way I would EVER bring in our issues when it comes to the boys. Their rights to see their father & to have him in their lives is the biggest factor in regards to visitation. They love & adore their father & unless there was a problem with their safety I would never deny them that.