so, who else HATES this? [Archive] - Bub Hub Pregnancy & Parenting Forum

meggie09

14-08-2009, 12:56

Yes i hate it too. When my hubby told his boss we were having no4, he said "what can't you keep it in your pants.":banghead: I just smile and say "well with kids like mine why won't i want more" ;) I must admit I really hate the "don't you have a TV comment." ha ha i hate this we have heard it a million and one times.

Mummaholic

14-08-2009, 13:01

I know what you mean, I am one of four and mum used to get these comments all the time! So stupid.

1. You must be Catholic. (actually we are, that's a coincidence though, not why there wer four of us lol) Mum used to say, actually, I have 4 children because I wanted 4 children.
2. Calling the van a 'sperm bus' - ew.
3. Broken tv, etc...

Check out thses shirts, they are funny with witty comebacks for these comments :) http://www.cafepress.com.au/evilgeniusstore/1225539

Mumma88

14-08-2009, 13:03

I haven't quite worked out how to deal with them yet I tend to just ignore it. But I am working up the courage to start responding now..

Dh and I had two ladies behind us in the shops yesterday waiting to be served.. Master 3 decided he wanted his 3rd lolly for the day and that the one he just opened wasent good enough to eat so he started to carry on... the ladies then started to interrupt Dh and I while we were talking with DS.

They continued to say over and over and over again 'Oh you have your hands full' ... 'you have your hands full there' ... ' Oh geez your hands are full' .... I didn't bother commenting because I was going to go off my nut big time if I tried.

I am really looking forward to seeing one of my mums friends who believes very strongly you are only meant to have one child two is pushing it.

She asked us awhile ago if we were having anymore (While I was pregnant with #4) and was said we are not sure.. maybe we will.. the look on her face said it all. She was horrifed.

So when I see her and get hit with the same question I am going to say 'Would you believe me if I said no?'

Check out this site..
http://www.plomp.com/largefam/comebacks.htm

anewme

14-08-2009, 13:04

Calling the van a 'sperm bus' - ew.

:barf: :barf: :barf:

Just Add Water

14-08-2009, 13:24

I had another parent at school comment the other day, her one child got out and she sat there as our 3 eldest climbed out, I kissed them all and told them I loved them and to have a great day... and she goes "Wow, a car full, how do you remember their names?" (WTF???!!!) Miss 6 then pipes up with "There's a baby in there too!" and this woman just looked at me like she felt sorry for me.

I so wasn't in the mood to be polite.... my response... "Well we still have some spare seats but we're really hoping for triplets next time, thank god for benefits hey?"

People just really sh!t me!

meggie09

14-08-2009, 13:33

I had another parent at school comment the other day, her one child got out and she sat there as our 3 eldest climbed out, I kissed them all and told them I loved them and to have a great day... and she goes "Wow, a car full, how do you remember their names?" (WTF???!!!) Miss 6 then pipes up with "There's a baby in there too!" and this woman just looked at me like she felt sorry for me. I so wasn't in the mood to be polite.... my response... "Well we still have some spare seats but we're really hoping for triplets next time, thank god for benefits hey?" People just really sh!t me! :thumbsup: :laughing: good one :yelclap:

MrsDribbleDrawers

14-08-2009, 14:10

I so wasn't in the mood to be polite.... my response... "Well we still have some spare seats but we're really hoping for triplets next time, thank god for benefits hey?"

People just really sh!t me!

:yelclap::laughing:

I must have no life, I never get any comments from anybody - even last school holidays when I had five kids trailing after me, and I'm obviously pregnant... not even going out just with the two toddlers gets a remark from anyone :D

Teley

14-08-2009, 14:29

Check out thses shirts, they are funny with witty comebacks for these comments http://www.cafepress.com.au/evilgeniusstore/1225539

:laughing::laughing::laughing::laughing:ILMAO. I love the one, no they're not all mine, I round up the neighbour's kids and then go shopping:laughing:.

One day hoping to be able to get those comments, as opposed to, so he's just your only hey?

You women are awesome:thumbsup:!

Mummaholic

14-08-2009, 19:03

I love the one, no they're not all mine, I round up the neighbour's kids and then go shopping

:laughing: Me too.

MyFab4

14-08-2009, 20:53

Oh yes, we have 5 children and I've heard them all too. The TV joke is so lame:rolleyes:, but I never say anything back. The worst thing I had said to me recently when asked how many I had was , " Can't you keep your legs closed?":eek: Felt like saying "can't you keep your mouth closed?" I also constantly get asked by the same people if we're having anymore. I usually say now "Would you really be surprised?"

jembelina

14-08-2009, 21:11

JabberJaw

14-08-2009, 21:13

Ignore them :p

What other people say about me, is none of my business :laughing:

She~Ra

14-08-2009, 22:32

Yep, i too have heard them all :yes:

I cant stand the tv remark, it makes me cringe, i usually just smile, and look down, cause if i say what i really want to say, i might be banned from the shops, lol..

I dont mind it when peolpe come up and tell me how well behaved they are, or how beautiful they all look, that makes me feel like im doing a good job, but it just makes me think im being judged when i get the sarcastic negative comments.
The most common one that i get is the, "im stuggling with just the 2 dont know how u do it with 5"!!
I do it fine thanx :)

my-fab5

15-08-2009, 07:51

Love the t-shirts (esp. if you think my hands are full then you should see my heart) and comebacks. I am just starting to get the rude comments and attitudes so this thread is great to arm myself with. I have been starting to feel like a freak for wanting a large family and have found myself going home doubting myself, until I realise how rich my life is (and I don't mean financially). Thanks for the great thread, it's just what I needed

Rainbows end

15-08-2009, 13:35

Oh yes some i have got in the last month or so

Dont you have a TV ( yep have 3 and one in the shed too )

Doesnt he know how babies are made.

The government supporting you these days !!!!

I dont pay taxes to give it to you.

If the gov stopped supporting people like me i wouldnt have so many .

Hubby cant keep it in his pants hey .

NOT another one your kidding.:devil6:

Dont you want a life.

Thats stupid having that many kids.

Do you realise you ahve to feed them and educate them they dont stay babies forever ( this one from my SIL ) :ecomcity:

Bout time you got fixed so you dont have any more.

I can never think quick enough to say something back and its mostly the under 50's who only have a child or 2 of some age.

The one i get just about everytime i go out is ' dont know how you cope with all of them ' um well beacuse mine are well behaved and i love them and want them so i cna deal with they throw at me maybe try some parenting and you might have good kids too. :hair:

There are others but i thought of these off the top of my head from our last shopping trips.

K

our little treasures

15-08-2009, 14:00

Hmmmm, I only have 3 so that could be why, but I tend not to get too many comments. I very often get the old "you have your hands full" but in all honesty I don't mind. It has only ever been said in a good natured way and well, I DO have my hands full....and some days it is kinda nice that people notice!

I get that one and I feel the same as you. I do have my hands full with 4 children under 6.

When others comment "I don't know how you do it" or " I couldn't do it" I take it as a compliment.

I know that I feel the same about people who have 1 or 2 kidlets. I wonder how come they wouldn't want more cherubs to love and hold.

In the end all of my friends have told me they would feel overwhelmed and stressed with more children so I believe it is more fascination that leads to the comments

Some people think if you have children close together it must have been unplanned:banghead: asd yes I know this happens to be the truth in a lot of families but not in mine. I find that offensive more than all of the above. All of our children were carefully planned and wanted:bee:

Just Add Water

15-08-2009, 14:01

http://www.cafepress.com.au/evilgeniusstore/1225539

http://www.plomp.com/largefam/comebacks.htm

Hubby and I are sitting outside while the kids are playing and reading through these sites... cracking us up - which is good as I'm sure we'll be getting more questions from our neighbours soon given the volume of our kids at the moment :laughing:

Poppetfish

15-08-2009, 14:09

I only have 2 so far but i get so many comments it is not funny. I find it funny that when they see DS sitting in the toddler seat in the pram they dont even notice DD in the back. I then pull her out for a cuddle and you should see people's faces!!!!Priceless!!!!!!

Some comments i get.

"Oh, you have one of each, you don't need any more." We plan on having 6.
"You must be busy, how do you do it?" I am busy but i also have lots of fun!
"How do you get out and about?" With a pram. DUH!
"Aren't you tired?" No. I got 9hrs sleep last night.:p
"I hope you are finished." No we want 6.
"Pidgen pair.":confused:
"Your house must be a mess." No. I clean while my kids nap.
"How do you afford them?" My Husband works and i don't wear Prada.

She~Ra

15-08-2009, 15:29

Rainbows end, the government question, i got that once, they pretty much suggested that i only have the kids to get money as my hubby was out of work at the time we had this conversation.
I got cranky and politley told them that when all 5 kids were concieved that hubby was working and earning the big bucks, we didnt get parenting payment back then, and the ftb is means tested, so we didnt get much of that and the only reason i get parenting payment now is because hubby was made redundant from his job!!
We had planned on having a big family from th start and im not going to put my ttc plans on hold just cause he was out of work!!

I said it all in a nice way of course :)

Hubby since then is now studying a pre apprenticeship in plumbing, so i still recieve the parenting payment, i have for a year now and i dont appoligise for it either, both hubby and i worked hard for many years...

Poppetfish, pmsl to the replys, i love the My Husband works and i don't wear Prada. :laughing:
I have designer things and so does hubby, but for them we choose to go with out other items, my kids have quality clothes too.
Why do people thing that the more kids u have, that u cant afford designer things?

My most hated one is the "you must shop at aldi" wtf, why must i shop there? because the duggars do, omg give me a friggin brake, tbh the things we buy cost just about the same at woolies as they do in aldi, so no we dont shop at aldi!!

Just Add Water

15-08-2009, 15:42

haha at the aldi comment - I love Aldi, but not only because it's cheap. I love a good bargain anywhere, and always have, even before I met DH and inherited 3 kids and added one to the mix.

We run our own business and things are very slow at the moment so we have recently pulled me off the payroll and I am on the parenting payment. DH is not receiving an income either from our business at the moment so he's getting a payment as well (I'm not sure what, being that he had 3 kids first he deals with all of that stuff :) ). But by doing that we are not getting rid of 4 other staff members and leaving them without a job.

Assuming that having lots of kids equals poverty is the same as people assuming that running your own business equals riches... it's all ridiculous and the comment are made by people who quite simply can't manage their own lives.

Hmm... sorry, obviously needed to get that out.

Josh

15-08-2009, 15:46

I have 10 kids and I dont tell many people that i am having my 11th in 6wks, could you imagine the comments, I was at my local chicken shop the other day and when I was ordering I was taking a while cause i was buying a lot:o and I could hear people mumbling behind me saying things like.. who are you buying for a football team:rolleyes: and I like turned around and said not quite.. I have 10 kids, so that shut them all up:laughing:

Just Add Water

15-08-2009, 15:55

LOL Jazzah... I went to the takeaway a while back and the girl said "That's a lot of food" and I just said "Well, I have a big family!"... I actually didn't think I was ordering that much considering we have friends and their kids over as well.

6fornow

15-08-2009, 18:52

Hi,
I just quickly had to add this in relation to the comment about feeling like jumping off a bridge some days- When my Aunty found out I was having my 3rd, she said to my Mum "What was she thinking? I'd slit my wrists if it was me!" Horrible:no:
Having said that, she only ever had two kids and her girls now have 3 kids each. She absolutely adores all 5 of my children, but she lives interstate and only visits annually, so I wonder if that helps?!:wave:

JamieJustDoes

15-08-2009, 19:28

privacy issues

sonlou73

17-08-2009, 09:18

I am pg with no. 4, I'll have 4 boys under 6 (5.5) soon. I've had all types of comments although more good than bad - the one that I have had a few times is 'you must be crazy', I even got that from a midwife friend!

There was a drop kick male tenant who came in to pay rent (I was serving someone else) he saw that I was pg & said to the other receptionist 'she's pg AGAIN, she's just after money from the govt', I wish I had heard him... I only work one morning a month & when I see him coming I walk off, I can't stand him & prefer to be nowhere near him cause he'll prob say something to me & I'd go off my nut!

LuvMy4Babes

17-08-2009, 22:29

I get lots of comments too although I must admit since my kids are getting older the comments aren't as often anymore. There are still lots of looks though, especially if I pull up at a shop and the kids are getting out of the car you can actually see some people counting them - ha makes me laugh!

When they were all under 7 the comments were pretty hurtful at times and downright stupid to be honest!

Don't you have a TV?

Yeah we have 3 and a great p*rn collection :)

Are they all yours?

No I stole some, sshhhhh.

God why would you want soooo many kids?

God would you not have manners?

People are so so stupid and rude sometimes. I just want to smack them :laughing:

I had a lady at school one day say to me "If I had as many kids as you I would drink every day". What a loser. She doesn't like her TWO kids and would never cope with 4, that's her problem - not mine :)

poppie

17-08-2009, 23:09

Some people say the stupidest things when they are jealous!

PunkyDiva

17-08-2009, 23:16

When peeps ask if all the kids are yours just reply " Oh no I work for a condom manufacturer and these are the customer complaints " they'll either laugh or shut up :p

I really hate when they ask if you don't have a television but my death stare is perfected and they get my unimpressed message pretty quickly.

Teley

17-08-2009, 23:16

You know what I think is hilarious (I have only one child btw).

It's when I used to say, I love kids, I want six, and since me being in my teens people would say,
Wait until you have them, then you'll change your mind!

And I used to go, I already have one:D!

Why do people think children are that bad lol?

spoon

18-08-2009, 08:52

I love my beautiful kiddies and my hubby:) I feel so lucky to be building this amazing life for myself and my family. Some people are just horribly shallow:no:. I have had some DOOZIES from people. The worst was by a jerk who was walking past myself and my children on the street in a hurry and he said "you know you have to educate and feed them dotcha" I was so blooming p!ssed off and wanted to say buggar off but he was too fast and gone in no time. That means I didn't get to put him in his place, and THAT infuriates me:hair:

But other days I just think people who say those things have major issues. And they must be crapola at dealing with things like not having favorites and giving and nurturing. I have plenty of people in my own life who are jerks let alone strangers, but we just live our life and we are truley happier than any of them.

siblingdream

18-08-2009, 21:14

Last Easter, I was away with friends and we all walked down to the local milk bar to get them icypoles. I sat all the kids down outside while the others went in to buy all the stuff we needed (me and twelve kids ranging from 2 to 14 years old). This total stranger walked by and said "Are they all yours?" and I said "yep, they all belong to me - seven different fathers though!":D

You know - I'd love to be in your shoes! It took me seven years, five operations and help from about 35 specialists and a lovely woman who donated her eggs to finally hold my beautiful daughter in my arms - and I'd do it all again without hesitation to give her a sibling. Because I've "just" got the one child I get the "how selfish, poor little lonely girl" comments from total strangers:hair:.

I think it's amazing how people feel impelled to comment on total strangers lives and their choices to their face!!

Shepherd

19-08-2009, 13:55

Until reading this thread it never occured to me that Mums to large families get negative comments (I am a Mum to an only). I am dumbfounded that people say some of the things they do to you. When I see Mums to large families I think its gorgeous and the thing I do truly always think is there must be so much love in the heart of that Mum. Why do people feel the need to question what they don't consider 'usual'? Unfortunately there are loads (loads!) of people who like the 'norm' to be 2-3 kids. More than that and people get judgemental or if you choose one like me you get the comments to - it makes me angry sometimes, I need to start my own thread to find some good comebacks for having one!

Myztik

19-08-2009, 14:01

I am pregnant with number 3 and hadn't considered ours to be a large family but I have already been asked if I'm stupid :eek: and also if I've worked out what causes it yet (getting pg) :rolleyes: and one of those came from a 'friend'..

SuperGranny

19-08-2009, 14:32

hi, a lot of people have thought my last baby was an accident, because he was our forth, and there is over three years between him and his older sisters. He was not an accident, he was very much planned and wanted. I agree people just seem to think they can make comments without any regard to your feelings, but also without realising the children can hear and understand what is being said infront of them sometimes. I guess it is just a human condition, not having to engage the brain before we speak. Marie.

MrsBeee

19-08-2009, 15:19

I agree with what someone else said about people not thinking that the kids can hear or understand. Though I've only got number 1 on the way, I'm one of 7 kids, and since I've been about 5, I've had people asking me if my family is catholic. :rolleyes: First of all, no, and second of all, why on earth would you ask a 5 year old that?? They're not going to know the reasoning behind your question (that catholics supposedly don't use birth control), and do you really want to be the one to educate them? I'm sure it created loads of questions for my poor mum from us kids.

Hooves

21-08-2009, 12:54

I hate all the negative comments too.

Although I must say I have made some of them, in my younger days. Before bub 3 came along.

Seriously, it is someones way of trying to be funny, or even trying to say, you must be very busy, with them all, Or trying to say, Gees, you are waaaaaaaaayyyyyy better then me.

I now have 4 children, and I love them lots, and am happy they are all here.

BUT they over whelm, me sometimes, and I find I have an awful lot of work to do, every single day.

I am great ful, I have them, not all of them were planned, and I have spent a bit of time feeling sorry for myself, over that.

I truly hate the comments, about only doing it for money!! wtf is that. As if anyone would do that?? I think that is the most stupid one of them all.

And the ya know you have to educate them. Well Dah!!

Some people are just plain rude. Others are just suffering from a serious case of :footinmouth:

I really do hate having to deal with other peoples stupidity, and misconceptions, aobut having a larger family though. AND I barely even glance in their direction any more, when I hear these comments. Some people just are not worth my time and energy.

I have enough to do, without gratifying these people with any kind of response at all.

Beeza8906

21-08-2009, 14:16

Dh and I get those comments and i'm only pregnant with number 2:no:

The one i got today from someone on facebook was "you two no how to do it don't you?'

These sorts of comments are just uncalled for, Why do people find it necessary to say crap like this?

Maybe there jealous?:p