a hard night tonight

[MeeG]

I had theeee worst experience, jus another way proving my hormones are out of control! the hospital signed me up for birthing classes and since i'm no longer with my baby to be dad i took my mum along as soon as i got there i felt so out of place, it was horrible all the couples together. 10 mintues into i burst into tears, so my mum took me aside and said we can go, it was horrible and i felt so out of place and i dont want to go back, i hate the feeling of me doubting myself, but i cant help but wonder if ive done the right thing with this baby? i knew i shouldnt have gone tonight all it did was upset me:crying: now i jus feel so depressed:gloomy:

[Imogensmum]

MeeG- it is hard to go to those things alone or without a "partner"- I too was with my mum at my birthing classes.

I felt isolated for the first few weeks and then I realised no-one there really cared that i was single- they were all focusing on there bubs and learning about the labour process. Once i realised that I quite enjoyed going- and it is quite useful especially as a first time mum.

Please stop doubting yourself you are/will be a fantastic mum- and single or not ever mother deserves to get all the info for the upcoming event!

Hold your head high and remember you won't be single for long- soon you'll have your baby in your arms and you'll never trully be alone again.

[tee]

hey :) i went to my first birthing class with my partner and STILL felt out of place! i was the youngest mum-to-be there, and the most alternative so felt really isolated. i didn't go back and really really really regret it because i was really unprepared for birth and being so naive really did my head in after a while. you'll find that you'll settle in and things will be okay.

of course you've done the right thing for this baby, and it sounds like you're doing the best for yourself and for him/her so far. keep strong, and i think going to more will really benefit, even if it's just for all the info that these classes provide. it's good that you've got your mum to go with you. i think my mum would have been better to go with than my partner anyway! haha, he was more awkward than me.

:hugs:

[ifoundmyglory]

I was also the youngest when i went, the age gap between me and the next pregnant lady was 6 years, and it was hard to find things it common making it hard and awkward.
Although i did have my partner, and again he was more awkward then me.
But we kept going back because i knew it was for baby's benefit more then my own.
Keep your head high, maybe a different birthing class might be an option?
But of course you are doing the right thing, bring a baby into this world is the most specialist thing one person can do.

[candlelover]

hey don't be upset- forget who is there and who isn't just remember your doing this to educate and prepare yourself for the birth of someone very special.

Go back with your Mum hold your head high, with my 1st DS my ex DP would not allow me to go because he didn't allow me to drive and he would have to pick me up and women have been giving birth blah blah i think you get the picture. Enjoy the support you have with your Mum. You are judging yourself i think you'll suprise yourself and find that nobody else is judging you.

Another suggestion get yourself a bubhub ribbon maybe there is another bubhubber there just waiting to meet you!

[meoneo]

My DP works shocker hours so i was the ONLY one by my self worse still we are in a small town so i knew everyone in the class and they were like oh he isn't here again such a shame :ecomcity: . But in the end it was good to go it is part of the whole kit and kaboodoole. Anyway it is funny how in a small room the dynamics of a group of people revert back to when we were in the school yard and so judging and naieve....
Have fun and thank your mum for bein a good one just like you will be

[SassyMummy]

I sorta understand what you mean...

I had (and still have) a partner, but he worked terrible hours (the joys of being with someone in the hospitality industry...:rolleyes: ) and I attended my first ante-natal class on my own. There weren't many mothers-to-be there (only 3), but all of them had someone with them. 2 had their partners, and 1 had her mother (because her husband was in Iraq).

I felt a little uncomfortable, but tried to tell myself that I had no reason to be. Anyway, I felt REALLY bad when the midwife running the class said, "Where's YOUR support person then?" When I explained that he worked, and couldn't make it, she was like, "Well if he wants to be a father, he's going to have make some sacrifices!" I was astounded - wasn't working in order to earn money helping us, as a family, out?

The next 2 weeks I dragged my mother along (she took time off work especially for it)...and the other weeks I made DP take time off work, just so I didn't feel embarrassed and humiliated again.

Is there a chance that you could get a friend to come along with you?

[Hokey Pokey]

I know how you feel. I did not have the father of my baby with my first but I had my Mum and my best friend and her Mum... it will get easier I promise :hugs:

[Supermum]

Hugs to you MeeG :hugs: - have sent you a PM.

[angcaltam]

I wouldn't worry about it. We had a single mum that went to ours, she bought her mum along with her. We didn't look at her any different, and we have been best buds since. You have the right to be there just as much as anyone else, please just remember that.

Sending lots of :hugs: and :kiss: your way. Keep your head held high.

[chameleon]

I didn't go to birthing classes so I can't comment. But don't worry too much about it, I'm sure the other couples there didn't think anything of it. I think it was brave of you to go in the first place. I was too chicken (and lazy) and I have a partner too.
:hugs:

-The Daddy- 19
-The Mummy- 18
-The Princess- 5 months :p

[~Danni~]

big hugs to you:hugs:

I also had my DF with me at my BFeeding class an the next youngest couple were nearly 10 years older than us, we both felt so out of place and wanted to leave... It must of been hard, it's really good you have your mum for support and like somone else said (sorry cant remember who, but you were very wise;) ) Once your bubba is hear you won't ever be on your own again:)

Things will get better :hugs:

[jessi]

I felt a little uncomfortable, but tried to tell myself that I had no reason to be. Anyway, I felt REALLY bad when the midwife running the class said, "Where's YOUR support person then?" When I explained that he worked, and couldn't make it, she was like, "Well if he wants to be a father, he's going to have make some sacrifices!" I was astounded - wasn't working in order to earn money helping us, as a family, out?




Bah, some midwives hey!! To that comment I would have responded with "Oh Im sorry- I didnt know that working to support your family to be wasnt allowed"...

I havent attended birthing classes or anything, but once we move, I will be. And I, also will be going alone as DF works long hours too.