Another Angel Ascended into Heaven

[polair61]

Hi - my fiance and I were expecting our very first child.

It has been the proudest few weeks of our lives, finally making a decision on how we plan to make it all work.

We got dealt with some difficult news, during my fiance's 12 week scan last Wednesday - that our baby's heart had stopped. :(

We don't know how, we don't know why. - I check to ensure my fiance hadn't received any trauma to her stomach, either by being pushed, or anything like that - but nothing. Our Ultra-sound person - had a tear when she tried to tell us, as we were both filled with excitement about seeing our baby on screen for the very first time....

A second opinion by a doctor - revealed that we had in fact lost our baby.

I am a Volunteer Ambulance Officer in Perth, WA - and have done so for 4-5 years. I've been able to deal with similar cases such as mis-carriages... but I broke down in tears, and apologised to my Fiance... We were left alone and cuddled and cried for what seemed like a life time...

It's been more than a week now, and it seems that nature still doesn't want to help us out by having the mis-carriage come naturally. I am now scared, frightened and just in despair - with what to do now.

Although my fiance is spotting, there is still no sign that her body will expel things all by itself. So I did the right thing by calling the hospital and will take her in to see what is going on...

I need to be stronger for my fiance that what I would out on duty - but I am struggling by the minute, waiting on news, that she has noticed bleeding etc - but nothing... I feel like I have so much to cry right now, but it feels like it's choking me...

George

[c38]

:hugs::hugs::hugs:

I'm so sorry for your loss
You don't have to be strong
You don't have to be anything other then there for each other.

Do you have supportive GP you could take her to?They should be able to help support and advice you and organise a referral for a D&C if thngs don't happen naturally soon.

[sambojambo]

george im so sorry for you both, you need to cry and crying does not mean your not strong for your girl , this is such a sad thing to happen to you both . You sound like such a lovely supportive partner and i'm sending you both a hug and hopes that you will get through this . I dont know why life sometimes presents us with difficulties and sadness , It is so unfair but the love you and your fiance have for each other WILL get you through this as heartbroken as you are. Bless you and your partner and your little angel xxxxx

[gizmoduckus]

I can't say it any better than what sambojambo and C38 said.

I am so sorry for your loss :hugs:

[SweetSerenity]

I'm so sorry for your loss.

It's an awful grief that sets in :hugs:

Make sure you are there for each other and you will get through it.

So sorry again :(

[mytwoangelsC&A]

:hugs:

[Mummita]

I'm so sorry for your and your fiancee's loss. I hope you can both support each other and lean on each other. Crying doesn't mean that you aren't strong or supportive for your partner. You need to look after your needs as well as hers. I agree, perhaps speak to your GP re a referral for a D&C. I have has one before after the miscarriage of my first pregnancy. Physically it wasn't painful for me at all afterwards. Emotionally, another story. Your GP could arrange for counselling for you both as well if you both like. I'm thinking of you both and your little angel.

[SixtiesChild]

I am so sorry.:hugs:
I also experienced this with my first pregnancy & found it devastating.
Just look after each other.:hugs:

[IndigoJ]

:hugs::hugs::hugs: Im so sorry for your loss:hugs:

[lealea79]

GBH's George, i feel you and your partner.. its an awful thing to go through.. ask about the D&C that will help with the grieving part (i know because i also had to have one after a m/c with my first pregnancy). it doesnt heal the pain but it does help to move on.

[singa06]

Oh George, I am so sorry to hear your sad news. I have read your other posts recently and know what hard decisions you have had to make and how emotional that must have been. Then once you finally decide what is the right thing to do for your future wife and child, this happens. My heart goes out to you and after suffering m/c's myself, I can only say that it WILL get better from here, I know these first few weeks are going to be tough and painful. but like the other poster said, you dont have to try to be strong. Let it all out.