dating so much more serious now?

[lochiebearsmum]

HI:wave:
Is it just me or do you now think dating is A LOT more serious now you have kids... I actually havent even been out on a date for 2 years since lochie was born, firstly because i really havent met anyone but also as i dont have anyone to watch lochie or anyone i'd want to explain to that i was going on a date (parents wouldnt appreciate that much!) Also then i worry what if lochie doesnt like the new guy, or if he just doesnt fit etc etc i dont want to date someone for 6 months and then have him leave... i dont want to put lochie through unnescessary changes.. i once had a friend that said you should date then you can come over for bbq's! :rolleyes: as being single im obviously the odd one out!!! i miss the days when i could go out and meet someone, it was noone elses business if it worked it worked and if it didnt it didnt, the only people hurt were the the ones directly involved or noone! i now think i wont date until lochie is 18!!!

[Teley]

I'm very similar in that I don't waste time with people I don't think I'll get with.

Which means I don't waste time with anyone really:laughing:. It's really sad, but yes being with children at least for me places all this pressure on you.

And plus, you don't have the hang out by yourselves time whenever you want, it's short and brief. And I think that makes it hard IMHO.

[Teley]

Btw what's with all the single parent dating threads tonight?:confused::confused:

[lochiebearsmum]

i think cause its saturday night and we are at home on our computers instead of out with some spunky man sweeping us off our feet!

[SurfingDadofTwo]

Would rather a spunky girl, but hey - different tastes!

[SPC]

I have mixed feelings. On the one hand I don't cope well with celibacy, but on the other hand I don't have time for a relationship when Esme is so little. I have found the solution is to send Esme to the market on Saturdays with her uncle and use that time to date with a very clear objective of 'nothing serious'. I told the last bloke about Esme but made it clear he wouldn't be meeting her. And as he was 8 years younger than me, the question of anything more than a fling wasn't an issue.

I don't intend to look for my nice husband until after I have a second child. I want a sibling for Esme but don't want to have one with somebody else, as Esme doesn't have a father around. I'm hoping my nice husband already has children and is happy to blend but not extend.

[Veritas]

I have mixed feelings. On the one hand I don't cope well with celibacy, but on the other hand I don't have time for a relationship when Esme is so little. I have found the solution is to send Esme to the market on Saturdays with her uncle and use that time to date with a very clear objective of 'nothing serious'. I told the last bloke about Esme but made it clear he wouldn't be meeting her. And as he was 8 years younger than me, the question of anything more than a fling wasn't an issue.

I don't intend to look for my nice husband until after I have a second child. I want a sibling for Esme but don't want to have one with somebody else, as Esme doesn't have a father around. I'm hoping my nice husband already has children and is happy to blend but not extend.

I love your approach to things!!!!! I have pretty much come to the conclusion I don't wish to have another child if it's with anyone other than DD's dad.... and since that isn't ever gonna happen in this lifetime, well that's it for me....

Right now, I am enjoying my life too much right now to add another element to it in the form of an emotional relationship, and I don't want people that are not right in and out of DD's life....

As with you SPC I don't mind a little physical companionship from time to time, and lucky for me I have a little and very good friend who feels just the same way..... might not work for some but works for me...

[Teley]

I have mixed feelings. On the one hand I don't cope well with celibacy, but on the other hand I don't have time for a relationship when Esme is so little. I have found the solution is to send Esme to the market on Saturdays with her uncle and use that time to date with a very clear objective of 'nothing serious'. I told the last bloke about Esme but made it clear he wouldn't be meeting her. And as he was 8 years younger than me, the question of anything more than a fling wasn't an issue.

I don't intend to look for my nice husband until after I have a second child. I want a sibling for Esme but don't want to have one with somebody else, as Esme doesn't have a father around. I'm hoping my nice husband already has children and is happy to blend but not extend.

See I'm a bit like you in wanting a second child like that. Except for I'll probably get rejected because I'm too young:gloomy:.

I'm lovin' being celibate though:valentine:.

[SmileyBJ]

For me I am truely happy for the first time in longer than I can even remember. However I still dream everyday that I will find a great man to build a strong, large and loving family with.

Im also coming to the realisation that this may be like dreaming to win the lottery... so id also love to look into foster care, adoption, single and pregnant etc.

[Mum2Bug]

I have recently started seeing a single dad and in a way i find it weird because Im so used to being on my own now I struggle to SHARE my life with Bug. One thing I didnt realise was just how much I wanted someone to hold me until I actually had it in my life again.

[SPC]

See I'm a bit like you in wanting a second child like that. Except for I'll probably get rejected because I'm too young:gloomy:.

I'm lovin' being celibate though:valentine:.

I think it's just a matter of having the cash. Provide your own semen, [from cryos or some other large international sperm bank], and pay for the IUI and it's not relevant how old you are`w. It's your family and only you can decide what spacing you want.

[lochiebearsmum]

My thoughts are very similar to you sweetperfectchild... i do not want any kids to a man im going to stay with as i never want lochie to feel on the outer.... ive also decided if i ever do meet anyone and we decide to get married i wont change my maiden name as lochie also has that... i never want him to feel anything but number 1!

[Issey]

yeah dating is alot more serious but I think it aslo has to do with my being older :eek:

I am hoping I have found the one :fingerscrossed: & am feeling pretty happy at this point.

My DS hasn't had a great deal to do with my boyfriend, easing it on from both sides.

[Amara]

I guess it would be.... don't really know though as I haven't managed to get a date yet..... and can't imagine ever having one again. I would like to though.