New Born wont settle

[Diddles]

I'm so stressed because our ds who is one day shy of being a week old will not settle to sleep of a night. I've been sucessful at putting him in his cot during the day and he sleeps well - I feed him aprox 3hrly. But it gets to 7pm and good baby turns into evil baby- he will just not settle to sleep at all, one night he didn't sleep till 5am. Out of sheer exhaustion last night with him wailing until 1.30am I put him to bed with me and he then settled and slept really well. This is not on though, as it creates bad habits from the start and it means me and hubby don't even share our bed anymore. (poor thing has taken to the couch just to get some sleep). This is my second baby and I didn't have these problems with my first - Any suggestions??????? from stessed tired mummy:crying:

[SJE]

Hi

my bubs did something similar

she would sleep in the day and then fight us until 1am

I ended up trying to keep her up more during the day. Shorten the sleeps maybe?

[the_queen]

If co-sleeping works, why not just go with that for a few weeks, and re-assess then?

[InSaneOne]

co sleeping is great for the first 3 months. by then bubs will be in more of a routine and you can easily transfer them to a cot without developing it into a habbit. thats what i did with my daughter. or you could start off in your bed or on the lounge until bubs is really asleep then transfer him to his cot.

i had an absolute s**t of a time getting my bubs to sleep for the first 2 months during the day and at night. then from 2 months she slept through the night and had better day sleeps. unforunately from 6 months she started teething and all that messed up. now we have a routine where she wakes once about 2am for a feed then sleps until 5 for another feed then maybe back to sleep.

have you tried holding him face down over your arm. put your arm horizontal put his head near your elbow and tuck in tight against your body. then try walking around like that. my bubs loved to sleep on her tummy and this was the easist way to get her to sleep. i could then put her down on her side and she would stay asleep. i know with sids that they say not to put bubs on tummy or side for sleeping but every baby is different and i know that whie some are happy sleeping on their backs others prefer tummys. (i know i can't get to sleep unless i am on my tummy)

[Baby Girl]

IF you are breastfeeding then chances are your supply by the end of the day is not as 'rich' and is taking more to fill him up. Both of my girls grazed of an evening from about 6pm to maybe 9 or 10pm and then they would settle.

If cosleeping is not going to work for you then maybe try sleeping in bubs room until he wakes for his first feed through the night and then go back to your own bed once he resettles (I am assuming once he finally gets to sleep at night he wakes to feed and resettles okay after a feed).

:hugs: It can be so confusing when they are so different to the first one. Good Luck.

[Crazy Monkey]

I had the same thought as you on co-sleeping, didn't want to start any bad habits... After a couple of nights of no (or very limitied) sleep, I just did whatever got me sleep and that meant taking DS to bed... For me it was a last resort... I would always try every other method first...

Your bubs is so young, he is probably trying to work things out just like you are... Go with whatever works... Things change so quickly... You will get one problem sorted out and then everything will change again...

DS is now 13 months and sleeps in his cot, putting himself to sleep... He had gone froma baby that wouldn't sleep much, if any, during the day to now having about 3-4 hours of sleep during the day (over 2 naps) and then sleeping 10-11 hours at night...

All the best

[gillianf]

I found this on another forum I'm on - it was useful when getting Matthew into a bedtime routine and figuring out his sleep patterns.

What is your bedtime routine like? We found that by setting Matthew into a good routine (i.e. bath, low light, last feed, soothing music and certain smells associated with bedtime) helped to get him to settle at night. He was sleeping through (7pm-7am) from 7 weeks of age. Oh, I also breastfed until he was 7.5 months old.

The following might help you (from babywhisperer.com )
Baby Sleep patterns

Keep in mind this is a guideline -- each child has his/her own norm!

1 week old:
Night: 8.5 hours;
Day: 8 hours - 4 naps, 2 hours each;
Total: 16.5 hours

1 month old:
Night: 8.75 hours;
Day: 7.75 hours - 3 naps, 2.25 hours each;
Total: 15.5 hours

3 months old:
Night: 10 hours;
Day: 5 hours - 3 naps, 2 naps of 1.75 hours and 1 of 1.5 hours;
Total: 15 hours

6 months old:
Night: 12 hours;
Day: 2.25 hours - 2 naps, 1 of 1 hour and 1 of 1.25 hours;
Total: 14.5 hours

9 months old:
Night: 11 hours;
Day: 3 hours, 2 naps of 1.5 hours each;
Total: 14 hours

1 year old:
Night: 11.5 hours;
Day: 2.25 hours - 2 naps, 1 of 1 hour and 1 of 1.25 hours;
Total: 13.75 hours

18 months old:
Night: 11.5 hours;
Day: 2 hours - 1 nap;
Total: 13.5 hours

2 years old:
Night: 11.5 hours;
Day: 1.5 hours - 1 nap;
Total: 13 hours

3 years old:
Night: 10.75 hours;
Day: 1.25 hours - 1 nap;
Total: 12 hours

4 years old:
Night: 11.5 hours
Day: no nap
Total: 11.5 hours

5 years old:
Night: 11 hours
Day: no nap
Total: 11 hours

6 years old:
Night: 10.75 hours
Day: no nap
Total: 10.75 hours

[mcinwalsh]

I have a 3.5 year old and a 6wks old neither of whom I would call good sleepers. My 3.5yr old is now however as a baby he wasnt. I know there is a lot of talk of co-sleeping being a bad thing but I go by the saying "whatever works" if he will sleep with you in bed especially at this early stage then I say go with it. He is still so young and just wants to be comforted. You need to remember that you need sleep as well. A happy mum is a happy family!
Our 3yr old slept with us a bit as a baby and we have no problem now with him sleeping in his own bed. I have had our 6wk old in bed with us a bit this week during the wee hours of the morning. We also use music when we her down and did the same with our son maybe that is something you could try.
good Luck with it I know how you feel

[Pixie]

I am currently teaching Eliza to sleep on her own during the day, night time no problems we did co-sleep but now she sleeps in her cradle all night for 4 days now no problems..it's worth a try I think.

[Diddles]

Thanks everyone on your advice. Last night we put a heater in his cold little room and he settled in his cot from about 8pm till 11.00pm, when he woke for a feed his bed was wet so i fed him and we co-slept till 5am. At 5 i changed his sheets and put him back in the cot, its now 8.30am and he is still sleeping!!!:thumbsup:
I think it's true though in these early days you just have to do whatever works to get them to sleep - tonight i will try keeping him in the cot all night and re-settling! DH is now the one who needs settling techniques - he's getting so worked up about lack of sleep that when he gets a quiet night like last night he still can't sleep:sleeping: :sleeping: :sleeping:
Sleep is such a necessity for us to function isn't it???

[bindiloo]

My bubs is 5weeks old and from week 2 we have had trouble with her sleeping from anywhere between 6pm up till midnight.

I would try to let her stay awake longer of a day and play with her but that didnt change things.

I would try a warm bath before her late arvo bottle feed but that didnt work.

THEN I FOUND THE ANSWER.

Ive sat a computer chair in her room and i get her bath ready when i hear her grizzling and begining to wake at that 5pm feed time. I give her a bath,change her nappy and her clothes into something fresh and warm then i sit in her room with just a dim night light on and i give her her bottle and from word go when i lifted her out of her bassinette when she woke i do not speak to her at all. Its hard but you just stay silent and do it all quietly and make sure the tv's in the house are turned down too.

After her bottle i sit there and burp her and put her over my shoulder and continue to rub her lower back slowly then sometimes a bit faster then slowly again and with a light patting of the bum too and if she has wind i just persist and let her whine about it and eventually she settles over my shoulder falling asleep. I will usually do this for at least 20min-30min after her bottle to make sure all milk is settled also. Then i place her down very slowly into her bed. Works everytime like a treat and now from 5pm till the next morning i never have a problem using this techinique with every night feed.
I also play some soft music like waves crashing or pan pipes in the background and leave it going when i leave the room.
I play it for her 5pm feed and the next feed,i never have a problem the rest of the night.
:smiliedance: :smiliedance: :smiliedance: we were so proud of ourselves for achieving this and its been working for days now without a hitch.

Goodluck and i hope you find a way that works for you as i know with my hubby getting up at 3.30am for work it can be very frustrating.

:)

[Baby Girl]

Sleep is such a necessity for us to function isn't it???Sleep deprivation is used as torture in some countries :yes: