breastfeeding 8 year old wdyt?

[em1984]

Came across this which I found quite fascinating, I'm all for extended breastfeeding, but something just doesnt sit right with me, not really sure what though?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxv6R9fUO74

What do you guys think?

[Hollywood]

I'm at work and the site is blocked so I can't view the link, but I'm assuming that it contains footage of an 8 year old BFing.

It is pretty old to be BFing, but if they both still want to then I don't really see the big deal. The natural age for self weaning world wide (according to the WHO) is 2 to 4 years or thereabouts, so this case of an 8 year old still BFing is probably pretty rare.

No doubt a lot of people will say 'that's disgusting' and so forth, but really, who are we to judge?

[studyingECS]

I don't find it gross/disgusting.

I think there are pro's and con's to having a breastfeeding relationship for that long.

And I guess it also shows the mothers dedication to breastfeeding, 8 years is along time.

[em1984]

Yeh its a mother breasfeeding her 8 year old...I dont know whether its the age so much that irks me, but its got footage of the 8 year old and her sister drawing pictures of mums boobies and talking about how much they love them, and they have names for each boob etc... And just before the mum feeds the girl, she has to give her this 'pep talk' almost, saying 'now no monkey business blah blah'.... I dunno, it almost seems like the little girl has this dominance over the mum or something I cant quite figure it out but its just a little odd...

[tyler's mum]

I think its disgusting and dont see the need for it:no:

[em1984]

I don't find it gross/disgusting.

I think there are pro's and con's to having a breastfeeding relationship for that long.

And I guess it also shows the mothers dedication to breastfeeding, 8 years is along time.

Its been longer than that, she breastfed the older sister till she was 5 and I think shes a few years older than the 8 year old!

[Krazy5]

I think "mum" has some serious issues........:(

[Mummy2R&K]

I'm sorry but it just doesn't seem right to me...........The girl is nearing the beginning of puberty!! :no: :barf:

:footinmouth::footinmouth:

[Hollywood]

Yeh its a mother breasfeeding her 8 year old...I dont know whether its the age so much that irks me, but its got footage of the 8 year old and her sister drawing pictures of mums boobies and talking about how much they love them, and they have names for each boob etc... And just before the mum feeds the girl, she has to give her this 'pep talk' almost, saying 'now no monkey business blah blah'.... I dunno, it almost seems like the little girl has this dominance over the mum or something I cant quite figure it out but its just a little odd...

Okay, yeah, I would draw the line at the pictures thing, that is a little creepy to me I have to admit.

I can understand totally how much the girls love BFing, I'm still BFing DS and he obviously loves it, but if he is still feeding at 3 and 4+ years of age I will be setting strict boundaries for him regarding what's appropriate and whether or not we BF in front of anyone except DH.

If we are still BFing beyond 3 or 4 I will tell DS that it's only something we do at home, and I certainly won't be putting a video of it on YouTube!! :laughing:

[ManekiNeko]

Not my thing personaly but hey who am I to dictate what others should do. Good for them not being worried about what anyone else has to say and doing what they feel is right.

[mummy2mimi]

i personally think its disgusting :barf:
but who am i 2 judge!

8yrs is an extradanary long time,what an achiement!!!:yelclap:

there has been studys shown that for the health of children we should really bf our child to the age of 5-7yrs,but because we live in a western environment it is "sociabley" not acceptable so people dont generally bf past 2yrs but their are benifits for the child

[pinkishbunny]

It is Disgusting and Disturbing! :no:

[jennababe]

really wrong!!! i didnt watch the link cos i dont wanna see it!

[BabelFish]

I don't think it's `disgusting' per se, but I do believe that there are underlying issues with anyone breastfeeding their child well past toddlerhood. In nature, you don't see fully grown animals still suckling from their mothers. Humans are (or should be) the same. Breastfeeding past three or four years or age has absolutely no benefit whatsoever and is becoming the sort of relationship that I believe `authorities' would frown upon. Let's consider if this 8-year-old was a boy - what would people think then? And what if, as seems quite possible in this case, he was still breastfeeding at 15, 16, 17?

To me this is just indicative of a mother with some very serious underlying psychological problems because once a child is at school, eating independently, and growing up into a young adult, they should not still be breastfeeding. I don't see it as an `achievement' at all, but some kind of strange co-dependence that could be as damaging in the long-term for those children as sexual abuse would be from someone within their family.

[dreamtobeamummy]

I don't think it's `disgusting' per se, but I do believe that there are underlying issues with anyone breastfeeding their child well past toddlerhood. In nature, you don't see fully grown animals still suckling from their mothers. Humans are (or should be) the same. Breastfeeding past three or four years or age has absolutely no benefit whatsoever and is becoming the sort of relationship that I believe `authorities' would frown upon. Let's consider if this 8-year-old was a boy - what would people think then? And what if, as seems quite possible in this case, he was still breastfeeding at 15, 16, 17?

To me this is just indicative of a mother with some very serious underlying psychological problems because once a child is at school, eating independently, and growing up into a young adult, they should not still be breastfeeding. I don't see it as an `achievement' at all, but some kind of strange co-dependence that could be as damaging in the long-term for those children as sexual abuse would be from someone within their family.


:iagree:.. Well Said.

I have seen that video before.. and Im all for extended breastfeeding but a 8 year old? I just think of it as my DSS breastfeeding.. now thats one thing I couldn't imagine and don't want to imagine!

[Phyllis Stein]

I think it's fricking amazing. :thumbsup:

I find it more "disgusting" and "disturbing" that others see breastfeeding as perverse, akin to paedophilia! :eek: Honestly, do you really think either the child or the mother are getting off from breastfeeding? I find the fact that anyone could even entertain the idea entirely abhorrent.

*sigh*Yet more evidence that women's breasts are seen as primarily and inherently sexual objects for men.

[BabelFish]

You and I are probably going to have to totally agree to disagree on this one Phyllis! :D

What is amazing about it? And who said breastfeeding is perverse? Of course it isn't - it's wonderful and beautiful and one of the most incredible gifts of motherhood.

But why do you actually still need to be breastfeeding an eight-year-old? Please outline the benefits for us. At what age does it become too old? Do you think it would still be ok to be breastfeeding your 22-year-old son? From what you write, it sounds like it ...

There is such a thing as going too far one way or another. Thinking that an eight-year-old at the breast is inappropriate does NOT translate to thinking that breastfeeding itself is wrong. That's an extrapolation that has not been offered by anyone here.

[workin'mumof2]

I think it's fricking amazing. :thumbsup:

I find it more "disgusting" and "disturbing" that others see breastfeeding as perverse, akin to paedophilia! :eek: Honestly, do you really think either the child or the mother are getting off from breastfeeding? I find the fact that anyone could even entertain the idea entirely abhorrent.

*sigh*Yet more evidence that women's breasts are seen as primarily and inherently sexual objects for men.

:iagree:

and to those that say there are no beinafits past 3-4 years of age i think you need to look again at sits like WHO,ABA and even kellymom

google things like
natural age of weaning ect and you will find plenty of info.

it is not discusting there is a hubber on this site that as far as i know is still feeding her 5year old 3year old and a newborn. thats bloody amazing in its self. NOT disgusting.:no:

i have seen the video and think its great.

[Mrs Nietzsche]

better an 8 year old on the boob than a 8 day old on a bottle.

[Hollywood]

I think it's fricking amazing. :thumbsup:

I find it more "disgusting" and "disturbing" that others see breastfeeding as perverse, akin to paedophilia! :eek: Honestly, do you really think either the child or the mother are getting off from breastfeeding? I find the fact that anyone could even entertain the idea entirely abhorrent.

*sigh*Yet more evidence that women's breasts are seen as primarily and inherently sexual objects for men.

Yeah, I agree. I am still BFing my nearly 2.5 year old, and to see people label any sort of BFing as

Disgusting and Disturbing!

really wrong

some kind of strange co-dependence
is a bit sad. As a BFer to a toddler, I can't help but take it a bit personally when BFing is slagged like that :gloomy:

Careful with your words, ladies :(

[PeppaH]

Came across this which I found quite fascinating, I'm all for extended breastfeeding, but something just doesnt sit right with me, not really sure what though?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxv6R9fUO74

What do you guys think?

Oh god I saw that ages ago and it makes me sick.:barf:
I just think that once a child is old enough to ask for it that would be enough for me lol. Im not saying its perverted or anything, I just think that if I saw someone doing that out in public or even at home I would loose my lunch right there and then.

[BabelFish]

better an 8 year old on the boob than a 8 day old on a bottle.
Oh yes, here we go. All of us terrible, awful mothers who neglected our children so terribly that we gave them a bottle at 8 days of age. You know why I did? Because my birth was so traumatic and I lost so much blood that my milk didn't come in for seven days, my baby was starving and jaundiced, and I had to give her a bottle for her own health.

I spent seven months of my life when she was born doing everything I possibly could, in every way, to breastfeed. We made it to seven months breastfeeding because of sheer hard work, persistence, blood, sweat and mountains of tears and there is no way someone should come on here and make such a thoughtless, casual, backhanded insult to those of us who tried so hard and yet gave our babies bottles at some points for their own good.

[Hollywood]

Oh god I saw that ages ago and it makes me sick.:barf:
I just think that once a child is old enough to ask for it that would be enough for me lol. Im not saying its perverted or anything, I just think that if I saw someone doing that out in public or even at home I would loose my lunch right there and then.

Some of these responses are making me sick :barf:

[Mrs Nietzsche]

Shows what a long way we have to go.

God forbid I said I feel like losing my lunch every time I hear about someone using formula for some idiotic reason.

[PeppaH]

Some of these responses are making me sick :barf:
Thats nice

[nothanksbye]

Maire was there any need for that comment?

I don't find it disgusting at all. It doesn't phase me as my cousin is 7 and still breastfeeds.

I would not do it personally as my aim is for my children to become dependent beings.
For my cousin it seems she is a very defendant 8 year old.
Wont go on play dates, wont be babysat always has to be with mummy.

She breastfeeds when she feels anxious and so is on the boob most of the night.

I love her but think its actually damaging her independence.

But I am basing my opinion on one situation so I don't know if it would affect all kids like that!

I can honestly say there s nothing gross or sick about it at all.

[Mrs Nietzsche]

I think someone should organise a toddler feeding sit-in so people can wake up to themselves.

Thosuands of women are feeding their toddlers out of sight because they fear this kind of prejudice!

[Mrs Nietzsche]

Sabio - yes - I think it's outrageous that I am supposed to be supportive of someone bottle feeding because they want to drink or whatever, whereas people feel free to make these horrific insinuations about breastfeednig as though it were something perverted once a certian cut-off date.

eta - Sabio, I would guess that it is not breastfeeding that is making the child you mention dependent, it is something else, and the continued breastfeeding is a *symptom* of that (not a cause).

[BabelFish]

I ask again - why is thinking that breastfeeding an eight-year-old is inappropriate, is all of a sudden the same thing as saying that breastfeeding itself is a problem? Who here has said that? Anyone? Has anyone here denounced breastfeeding itself? No, of course not.

It's just the typical brigade of opinions where if you dare to speak a word against the almighty sanctity of breastfeeding (which nobody has, I point out again) then you are slammed as being anti-breastfeeding.

It's utter crap and I'm so sick of it. Nobody here has said that breastfeeding is wrong, disgusting, co-dependent, perverse or anything else. NOT ONE PERSON. In fact, I think if anyone bothered to find out, they'd discover that each and every one of us breastfed their child/children.

And nobody has answered my question, either. At what age is it the right age to stop? Would everyone be ok with someone still breastfeeding their 22-year-old son? What about people, like me, who tried and tried and tried and tried but just were unable to continue with breastfeeding, being villified for using a bottle (**gasp**).

Also, not a single person here - NOT ONE - has said anything about breastfeeding toddlers, either. Not a single one.

It would be nice if everyone would get off their ridiculously high horses and acknowledge that just because some of us feel that breastfeeding an eight-year-old is no longer acceptable, that NONE of us feel that breastfeeding itself is in any way wrong or undesirable.

[nothanksbye]

Sabio - yes - I think it's outrageous that I am supposed to be supportive of someone bottle feeding because they want to drink or whatever, whereas people feel free to make these horrific insinuations about breastfeednig as though it were something perverted once a certian cut-off date.


Yeah..I know its horrible that people could possibly see extended breastfeeding as some sort of sick abuse.

But by attacking formula all you do is sink to the same level of us against them.

And yes you could be right about my cousin.

[sara86]

IMO 8 years old is WAY too old to be still breastfeeding!

I watched this video a few months ago and to be honest i found it very discusting and disturbing.

Im all for breastfeeding, dont get me wrong, but 8 YEARS OLD! seriously, come on!!

That is very close to puberty, and I find it very wrong.... JMO!

[Mrs Nietzsche]

Why?

Why is it okay for people to post all sorts of crap about extended breastfeeding, but not okay to say that bottle feeding for a frivolous reason is wrong?


Why????

Because breastfeeding is not a norm. Because the bottle feeding demographic wield enormous power.

You can't even have an ad campaign for breastfeeding without a load of people whining that it makes them feel guilty for bottle feeding.

[nothanksbye]

Neither is right.

[BabelFish]

Maire, it would be really great if you would answer some of my questions. Where is anyone here saying that breastfeeding itself is wrong? At what age would you consider it appropriate to stop? How would you feel about someone still breastfeeding their 22-year-old son? What are the benefits of continuing breastfeeding, past say, the age of 6? Why have you turned this into a question of bottle-feeding vs breastfeeding?

[Phyllis Stein]

You and I are probably going to have to totally agree to disagree on this one Phyllis! :D

What is amazing about it? And who said breastfeeding is perverse? Of course it isn't - it's wonderful and beautiful and one of the most incredible gifts of motherhood.

Are you serious? Your post above said: "that could be as damaging in the long-term for those children as sexual abuse would be from someone within their family".

What is amazing about it is that it is a selfless act by a mother wanting to give her child the gift of self-weaning. You can't *make* a child bf, so the fact the child still wants it says that she is gaining some benefit from it.



But why do you actually still need to be breastfeeding an eight-year-old? Please outline the benefits for us. At what age does it become too old? Do you think it would still be ok to be breastfeeding your 22-year-old son? From what you write, it sounds like it ...

The need comes from the child, not the mother. If the child is still gaining comfort and emotional security from it, then there is a benefit. And that's on top of the amazing nutritional and immunological benefits it confers. Breastmilk is one of the most highly nutritious substances out, no less so because it's consumed by an older child.

Of course it would be different if it were an ADULT breastfeeding, though some people do do it for health reasons (cancer). It would also be different for someone who was nearing adulthood and sexually mature, simply because they are at the developmental point of gaining independence. But a seven year old is still very much a child, still very much dependent on the primary attachment with her parent/s, and still making the choice to breastfeed.



There is such a thing as going too far one way or another. Thinking that an eight-year-old at the breast is inappropriate does NOT translate to thinking that breastfeeding itself is wrong. That's an extrapolation that has not been offered by anyone here.

Of course it has. Breastfeeding is breastfeeding. It's a normal, natural part of mothering and child development. Children, when left to their own devices, choose to wean at all different ages, it's normal! When we talk about breastfeeding, we don't limit it to infants, or babies, or even toddlers. So why is the line drawn arbitrarily for children? Why is it any less beneficial or normal because it's a child choosing to breastfeed? I'll answer my own question - there is no reason. Society simply decided that it's wrong because it has an inbuilt discomfort with women using their bodies in intimate ways that don't involve men.

[Mrs Nietzsche]

Why are your questions relevant?

I think it far more appropriate to breastfeed an 8 year old, than to stick a newborn onto a bottle because you think breastfeeding is icky.

It is ludicrous to start going on about 22 year olds.

8 years old is just out of the age range that is considered to be the natural weaning age bracket for humans.

[Hollywood]

Are you serious? Your post above said: "that could be as damaging in the long-term for those children as sexual abuse would be from someone within their family".

What is amazing about it is that it is a selfless act by a mother wanting to give her child the gift of self-weaning. You can't *make* a child bf, so the fact the child still wants it says that she is gaining some benefit from it.



The need comes from the child, not the mother. If the child is still gaining comfort and emotional security from it, then there is a benefit. And that's on top of the amazing nutritional and immunological benefits it confers. Breastmilk is one of the most highly nutritious substances out, no less so because it's consumed by an older child.

Of course it would be different if it were an ADULT breastfeeding, though some people do do it for health reasons (cancer). It would also be different for someone who was nearing adulthood and sexually mature, simply because they are at the developmental point of gaining independence. But a seven year old is still very much a child, still very much dependent on the primary attachment with her parent/s, and still making the choice to breastfeed.



Of course it has. Breastfeeding is breastfeeding. It's a normal, natural part of mothering and child development. Children, when left to their own devices, choose to wean at all different ages, it's normal! When we talk about breastfeeding, we don't limit it to infants, or babies, or even toddlers. So why is the line drawn arbitrarily for children? Why is it any less beneficial or normal because it's a child choosing to breastfeed? I'll answer my own question - there is no reason. Society simply decided that it's wrong because it has an inbuilt discomfort with women using their bodies in intimate ways that don't involve men.

:yelclap:

[BabelFish]

Sorry, Phyllis, but some of what you have said is you putting meanings behind things I wrote, that were not there to start with. I never said breastfeeding itself is wrong. Not once. Not at any point. My comments were entirely concerned with breastfeeding an eight-year-old. Not breastfeeding on its own. And I think we both know that. I appreciate your responses to my other points, though.

Maire, I hope, hope, hope that you are not the kind of woman who sees a mother bottle-feeding her child and pronounces judgement. I hope you don't give them looks. I hope you don't purse your lips and shake your head, as your inbuilt prejudice against bottlefeeding makes itself known, and that you don't deliberately make women you see bottlefeeding feel small, insecure, guilty or otherwise.

If you do that (and somehow I think you might) then you are just as guilty of the kind of judgement that you accuse others of in terms of breastfeeding. You do not know everyone's circumstances and the fact that you have been so able to hurt those of us on here who had to bottlefeed for one reason or another, with your casual insults, shows that you give it less thought than you accuse others of giving to breastfeeding mothers.

If you're talking about stopping the judgement, why don't you make a start on that yourself?

My questions are entirely relevant. That they might make you uncomfortable and you might find them difficult to answer without contradicting yourself is neither here nor there. I only asked one question about a 22-year-old. The other questions were all pertaining to breastfeeding, and this thread.

[PeppaH]

:iagree:.. Well Said.

I have seen that video before.. and Im all for extended breastfeeding but a 8 year old? I just think of it as my DSS breastfeeding.. now thats one thing I couldn't imagine and don't want to imagine!

EEWWW Thanks for the image..... :eek:

[Mrs Nietzsche]

Talk about melodramatic :rolleyes:

YOu act like you are a jew in nazi germany carrying ona bout looks and so on.

I hope hope hope you aren't one of those people who give women looks when they feed their 20 mth old in public.

I hope hope hope you aren't one of those people who have driven women who choose to let their child set the time frame for breastfeeding, into hiding.

I hope hope hope you aren't one of thse people who say 'are you STILL breastfeeding' as if its weird to breastfeed over 6 mths.

[BabelFish]

Absolutely I'm not. I have no trouble answering the questions of anyone else at all. The fact that you keep deflecting everything I ask of you back onto me shows that you cannot (and will not) address a single thing I've put to you.

I've already said here that I breastfed past six months and that I wished with all my heart that I could have gone for longer. I've already said here that breastfeeding is wonderful, beautiful and an incredible gift to mothers. I've already said that there is absolutely nothing wrong at all (in my opinion) with breastfeeding toddlers.

What have you said except empty accusations? Not much at all.

[Mrs Nietzsche]

I am deflecting to make a point, which you are clearly failing to grasp.

There is probably a natural time frame for breastfeeding. it is estimated to be 4-7 years - though there are different ranges estimated.

8 years may be over that age range for breastfeeding - but 8 days - even 8 months - is sure as sh1t under it.

Why are we remarking so particularly on an 8 year old?

Breastfeeding certainly isn't going to do her any *harm*.

WHy not focus on all the infants who never get to breastfeed at all?

[BabelFish]

Thanks for answering.

The thread is about an eight-year-old. That's why we're remarking on it.

And for those children who never got to breastfeed at all, I believe that is a very sad thing, I really do. But that's not what THIS thread is about.

[mamesmumma]

I tried and I cant write this without being somewhat offensive.

All I'll say is that BF'ing till 8 is not for me. That being said to deem something 'disgusting' purely out of societal views shows nothing but ignorance and stupidity.

There is no evidence that breastfeeding should stop at any certain age. As Australians we are one of the earliest weeners in the whole entire world. What we do has been proven medically to be not the best for our children.

Take from that what you will.

[PeppaH]

WHy not focus on all the infants who never get to breastfeed at all?
Yes..Because Im sure bottle feeding will cause harm to a child :confused::confused:
So at what age do you think its alright for a child to be breast fed up until then? Maybe when they start highschool?
It might be natuarl to breast feed, but its certainly not normal to breast feed an 8 year old.

[Phyllis Stein]

Sorry, Phyllis, but some of what you have said is you putting meanings behind things I wrote, that were not there to start with. I never said breastfeeding itself is wrong. Not once. Not at any point. My comments were entirely concerned with breastfeeding an eight-year-old. Not breastfeeding on its own. And I think we both know that. I appreciate your responses to my other points, though.

Maire, I hope, hope, hope that you are not the kind of woman who sees a mother bottle-feeding her child and pronounces judgement. I hope you don't give them looks. I hope you don't purse your lips and shake your head, as your inbuilt prejudice against bottlefeeding makes itself known, and that you don't deliberately make women you see bottlefeeding feel small, insecure, guilty or otherwise.

If you do that (and somehow I think you might) then you are just as guilty of the kind of judgement that you accuse others of in terms of breastfeeding. You do not know everyone's circumstances and the fact that you have been so able to hurt those of us on here who had to bottlefeed for one reason or another, with your casual insults, shows that you give it less thought than you accuse others of giving to breastfeeding mothers.

If you're talking about stopping the judgement, why don't you make a start on that yourself?

My questions are entirely relevant. That they might make you uncomfortable and you might find them difficult to answer without contradicting yourself is neither here nor there. I only asked one question about a 22-year-old. The other questions were all pertaining to breastfeeding, and this thread.

First off, Maire was just using bottlefeeding to make a point, a valid one at that. If our culture thinks nothing of 'elective' formula feeding with all its health risks, yet happily demonises breastfeeding with all its benefits, then we have a seriously deep rooted cultural problem.

Secondly, it is you who is making the artificial distinction between "legitimate" breastfeeding and the "other" kind. I see them as one and the same. This statement of yours, "my comments were entirely concerned with breastfeeding an eight-year-old" - others say the same thing, but put the age at one or at a stretch, two. They are projecting their own prejudices onto a perfectly normal, healthy relationship at that age, you're doing exactly the same thing to an eight year old. It's all just normal breastfeeding, based on the acceptance that a child will choose their own time to wean.

[Mrs Nietzsche]

First off, Maire was just using bottlefeeding to make a point, a valid one at that. If our culture thinks nothing of 'elective' formula feeding with all its health risks, yet happily demonises breastfeeding with all its benefits, then we have a seriously deep rooted cultural problem.


Ty Phyllis for translating. And I thought it was all so obvious, lol.

[PeppaH]

It's all just normal breastfeeding, based on the acceptance that a child will choose their own time to wean.

Im not having a go here, I truely want to know....You say its based on when a child chooses to wean, but what happens if the child doesnt choose to wean at all. What happens if they keep going through adulthood??

[Hollywood]

Im not having a go here, I truely want to know....You say its based on when a child chooses to wean, but what happens if the child doesnt choose to wean at all. What happens if they keep going through adulthood??

I really doubt that would happen.

[BabelFish]

Phyllis - thanks for explaining yourself so well. I understand the point you are trying to make, and I agree with you on one level. I do, however, feel that there is age-appropriate breastfeeding. 8 years old is not that, for me. Not really because of societal reasons but more what I deem to be psychological reasons.

Maire, your point isn't obvious to anyone when it is couched so insultingly. By saying `better a breastfeeding 8-year-old than a bottle-feeding 8-day-old' it is lumping every, single person who bottle-feeds into the same basket, whether they felt as though they had no choice in the matter or not. Perhaps if you explained yourself better, the way Phyllis has, and pointed out in the beginning that you did not intend to include people like me, for example, it might have come across a little better.

You haven't really made that distinction at all though, at any point. So I am to assume that you feel exactly the same way about a women in my situation bottle-feeding as you do for someone who chooses to bottle-feed because they want to drink. And yet you call others judgemental?

[Mrs Nietzsche]

Once again - I would save your concerns for all the newborn babies most certainly do *not* choose to wean but are put on a bottle anyway.

Humans are mammals. As a result, we have an entire world of other mammals to draw on to make comparisons with when it comes to breastfeedign behaviour.

And we can see that, for example, tehre are no adult tigers breastfeeding. No fullgrown gorillas. No chimps breastfeeding once they are in adulthood. Etc.

So if you are so seriosuly worried that a child might never wean, you can take some comfort from the fact that the rest of the animal kingdom seems to have managed natural weaning just fine.

[nothanksbye]

I think its around 9 or 10 that naturally children want to start to be more independant.

Its about 10 they start to seek comfort from elsewhere.
(OH HOW SAD WILL THAT BE!)

So I guess thats the age where you would expect a child to self wean and if they didnt thenm you might start to encourage self comforting in a gentle way??

Thats just what I remember learning..so I could be wrong.

[nothanksbye]

Do you think that oe of the big issues is that we age our children?

we expect quite a lot from quite small humans?

like in all honesty an 8 year old s still a young child. They still need comfort and security.

But our society is big on independance.

[Mrs Nietzsche]

Chesby - I actually referred to frivolous reasons several times.

It's very common for people to read posts and let thier own insecurities dominate their reading.

[PeppaH]

I really doubt that would happen.
Why though? If the child gets comfortable and used to being able to cuddle up to mummy and have a suck whenever they want, it would be like for instant, a child that gets used to waking up everynight and having someone come in to put the back to sleep (they never learn to self settle).
So a child could get used to being BF and not want to stop.

[Looshkin]

Talk about melodramatic :rolleyes:

YOu act like you are a jew in nazi germany carrying ona bout looks and so on.

I hope hope hope you aren't one of those people who give women looks when they feed their 20 mth old in public.

I hope hope hope you aren't one of those people who have driven women who choose to let their child set the time frame for breastfeeding, into hiding.

I hope hope hope you aren't one of thse people who say 'are you STILL breastfeeding' as if its weird to breastfeed over 6 mths.

I think everything you have said is so unfortunately valid.

You're right - At what point is it OK to say oh formula feeding DISGUSTING? Never? That's right because it's totally not ok.

Yet it's totally common for comments to be ew, disgusting, ew gross - in regards to breast feeding a newborn (from some women), breastfeeding a toddler (most of society) god forbid breastfeeding after 2... (unnatural sexually peverted)

I agree with phyllis here, it shows how brainwashed that breasts are for the enjoyment of men, our bodies are inherently sexual and so breastfeeding an older child is somehow sexually related.

I wonder if those saying 'ew' would feel any differently to expressed milk?
So why is it any different?

Obviously there must be insanely powerful health benefits, if breastmilk can be helpful in people with cancer

But it's increasingly upsetting to me, that doing what is natural in human bodies is seen as disgusting, because they are first sexual, and only second functional..

Oh and the animal thing, actually some elephants can breastfeed form their "aunties" as well as mothers after 5 years, but 2 years seems to be "the norm"
But I guess it's not perverted for them, because their breasts are not sexual.:confused:

[Hollywood]

Do you think that oe of the big issues is that we age our children?

we expect quite a lot from quite small humans?

like in all honesty an 8 year old s still a young child. They still need comfort and security.

But our society is big on independance.

Yes, I think we do sometimes expect to much too soon. I keep having to remind myself with DS that "He's just a little boy", especially when he's losing it in a tantrum over something small :o

[Mrs Nietzsche]

It's actually unfortunate that extended breastfeeding isn't heavily promoted i the west.

I think its something like 2/3 of children in our society are deficient in omega 3 intake, a nutrient that breastmilk is rich in.

Some researchers say that our generation is 'dumber' than the previous, as a result of lifelong deficiency of essential fats.

So in a soceity in which 2/3 of children are deficient in omega 3, extended breastfeeding would be a huge and cost-free way to go some way to rectifying that deficiency.

[Mrs Nietzsche]

That's interesting Sabio. I think in our culture we are really big on independence and individuality.

I think also that we just don't cater for mothers, in a way... it's seen as inconvenient to structure society around half the population breastfeeding for more than a token amoutn of time when children are very young.

We kind of don't fully cater for the biological differences... women can spend a bit of time being pregnant and breastfeeding, but to allow for those differences is just too inconvenient for a society in which the male is really the norm... I don't know, I have a screaming baby on my lap so I will have to stop thinking about it!

[PeppaH]

Oh and the animal thing, actually some elephants can breastfeed form their "aunties" as well as mothers after 5 years, but 2 years seems to be "the norm"
But I guess it's not perverted for them, because their breasts are not sexual.:confused:

I think its a bad exsample to say humans and animals are the same. Humans are a more advanced and intellent species and shouldnt be compared to the animal kingdom.
I dont find BF sexual at all, I just think that from a certain age (maybe 4 or 5 at the latest) a child shouldnt be drinking from the breast. If I wasnt to BF I wouldnt do it past the age of one but thats just me and others seem to do it longer which is fine but I still find it gross (again though thats just me).

[Hollywood]

I think its a bad exsample to say humans and animals are the same. Humans are a more advanced and intellent species and shouldnt be compared to the animal kingdom.
I dont find BF sexual at all, I just think that from a certain age (maybe 4 or 5 at the latest) a child shouldnt be drinking from the breast. If I wasnt to BF I wouldnt do it past the age of one but thats just me and others seem to do it longer which is fine but I still find it gross (again though thats just me).

But we ARE part of the animal kingdom :confused:

[mum2bubba]

I have seen that before. I don't think its right at all.

[PeppaH]

It's actually unfortunate that extended breastfeeding isn't heavily promoted i the west.

I think its something like 2/3 of children in our society are deficient in omega 3 intake, a nutrient that breastmilk is rich in.

Some researchers say that our generation is 'dumber' than the previous, as a result of lifelong deficiency of essential fats.

So in a soceity in which 2/3 of children are deficient in omega 3, extended breastfeeding would be a huge and cost-free way to go some way to rectifying that deficiency.

If your only saying BF should be longer used for the Omega 3 intake, well there are other stuff that a child can have instead. So I dont think that a mother should be frowned apon because she isnt BF her 4 year old etc if he has lake of Omega 3, there are carton milk out that has it in or fish etc. So whats so bad about giving a child that? Adults arent told they need to be BF in they lack something thats in breastmilk, that are told to eat more or ........... or take tablets etc

[~Temet Nosce~]

What do I think of breastfeeding at 8?

:no: nooo way! Not for me and to be honest shouldn't be for anyone else either! FFS ...

And I'm not even going to bother explaining myself on why I find it wrong, I just do.

I'm all for 2, or 4, or 5, but 8, errrrr no.

[PeppaH]

But we ARE part of the animal kingdom :confused:

Yeah but, when a lion kills another lion over a meal, they dont get thrown in jail. Im saying we are by far different and dont act on animal instincts in the way animals do. We have rules and laws to protect us and it makes us different.

[Blueberry Crumble]

Not for me, thats for sure. If we lived in a society where it was common, then yeah. But I would worry about peers.

Whatever floats your boat.

[Looshkin]

So you think it's totally ok to drink another species breastmilk well into adulthood?

It seems pretty hypocritical, you know?

So then is the problem drinking directly from the breast, as obviously drinking another species breastmilk is socially acceptable..?

So it then is sexual, as the problem is the breast, not drinking expressed milk or an 8 year old having EBP on their cereal etc..?

[SammieSnail]

Sure lets just let children decide when everything happens. Lets blame peoples disgust on the sexualisation of breasts. Oh come on, an 8 year old child does not need to breastfeed for comfort. The mother has let her child down plain and simple.

I'm all for breastfeeding, heck I breastfed DS till he was 18 months. But anything over 3-4 years old is unnesscessary and is for the mothers benefit not the child.

[PeppaH]

Not for me, thats for sure. If we lived in a society where it was common, then yeah. But I would worry about peers.

Whatever floats your boat.

Yeah I think thats what everyone is getting so worked up about though, people are too judgemental on BF and thats why people dont do it out in public or extended BF etc:o I dont think I would do it even if it was socialally acceptable. Its not for me.

[Hollywood]

Yeah but, when a lion kills another lion over a meal, they dont get thrown in jail. Im saying we are by far different and dont act on animal instincts in the way animals do. We have rules and laws to protect us and it makes us different.

We're more similar to animals than most people would care to admit. Imagine if someone was trying to hurt your child. You would probably go into 'mother bear' mode and do anything you could to save your child. Just about everything we do is based on our natual animal instincts, even down to flirting with the opposite sex ;)

[PeppaH]

So you think it's totally ok to drink another species breastmilk well into adulthood?

It seems pretty hypocritical, you know?

So then is the problem drinking directly from the breast, as obviously drinking another species breastmilk is socially acceptable..?

So it then is sexual, as the problem is the breast, not drinking expressed milk or an 8 year old having EBP on their cereal etc..?

I think I (ME MYSELF AND I) would find it gross even if someone would expressing milk for an 8 year old. So NO its not sexual. I (THATS ME) just find that giving breastmilk in general to an 8 year old is gross whether thats bottled or in a cup.

I find it funny though, when I said something about the way of certain people living like animals, I got shot down...But now because it seems to help the 'other side's argument, its ok to say we are like animals....Funny....

[PeppaH]

We're more similar to animals than most people would care to admit. Imagine if someone was trying to hurt your child. You would probably go into 'mother bear' mode and do anything you could to save your child. Just about everything we do is based on our natual animal instincts, even down to flirting with the opposite sex ;)

Well when lions and tigers and bears start building houses out of wood or brick and start having b!tch wars over the internet or start plugging their ipods in when out doing their daily exercise... Maybe then I will be swayed.

[Semana]

I, personally wouldn't breastfeed my 8 year old.

That is all.

[nothanksbye]

I guess i find the sexuality comments very interesting.

An 8 year old that breastfeeds would only know that breasts are used fro milk. They would have absolutely no idea on the sexual use for breasts...UNLESS an adult taught them.

So we are aging our 8 year olds into sexual beings.
My cousin says that breastfeeding an 8 year old erases all sexual thoughts with her breasts.
Her hubby doesnt touch them as they have changed roles. they are milk supply and nothing else.
She doesnt get turned on by feeding her daughter.

Thats why the disgusting or sick comments astound me...
My 7 year old showers with me and also DH. He doesnt look at us as sexual. He watched me breast feed DD and he doesnt thin its sexual.

[Hollywood]

I guess i find the sexuality comments very interesting.

An 8 year old that breastfeeds would only know that breasts are used fro milk. They would have absolutely no idea on the sexual use for breasts...UNLESS an adult taught them.

So we are aging our 8 year olds into sexual beings.
My cousin says that breastfeeding an 8 year old erases all sexual thoughts with her breasts.
Her hubby doesnt touch them as they have changed roles. they are milk supply and nothing else.
She doesnt get turned on by feeding her daughter.

Thats why the disgusting or sick comments astound me...
My 7 year old showers with me and also DH. He doesnt look at us as sexual. He watched me breast feed DD and he doesnt thin its sexual.

Yeah, it makes me wonder if people who say those things have some underlying sexual issues themselves :detective:

[dreamtobeamummy]

EEWWW Thanks for the image..... :eek:

LMAO!!! Sorry Peppa :D

[PeppaH]

Thats why the disgusting or sick comments astound me...
My 7 year old showers with me and also DH. He doesnt look at us as sexual. He watched me breast feed DD and he doesnt thin its sexual.

I have already said that I wont have my children in the shower with me after the age of 2 lol Not because Im worried abotu it being sexual, more for the fact I remember having showers with both of my parents and I vividly remember it and it grosses me out to this day haha. :laughing: SO thats just a choice for me.

[studyingECS]

Honestly in order to make people accept that breastfeeding is a normal and natural way to feed a child I don't think we (society) should be putting boundries on it according to your own preference.

Fair enough to not want to breastfeed or to want to stop at a certain age, but why should others have to do that?

Just my 2 cents worth.

[nothanksbye]

I have already said that I wont have my children in the shower with me after the age of 2 lol Not because Im worried abotu it being sexual, more for the fact I remember having showers with both of my parents and I vividly remember it and it grosses me out to this day haha. :laughing: SO thats just a choice for me.

aww thats sad that you have such bad memories of it.



******************************

so what is the magic age then in every ones head?
What age do you consider to old?
I would have said younger but now thanks to this thread i am starting to think its purely based ont he child and mother in question.

I guess puberty is probably where it starts to interfere with the childs start of sexuality???

[Semana]

I have already said that I wont have my children in the shower with me after the age of 2 lol Not because Im worried abotu it being sexual, more for the fact I remember having showers with both of my parents and I vividly remember it and it grosses me out to this day haha. :laughing: SO thats just a choice for me.

Same :barf::laughing: DS came into the bathroom once when I was in the shower and said 'Mummy, I can see your suesue's (boobies) and walked back out in disgust :laughing:

[PeppaH]

Honestly in order to make people accept that breastfeeding is a normal and natural way to feed a child I don't think we (society) should be putting boundries on it according to your own preference.

Fair enough to not want to breastfeed or to want to stop at a certain age, but why should others have to do that?

Just my 2 cents worth.

Dont get me wrong I would in no way pull faces at some one if I saw the doing that in public. In fact I most likely would be the first person to jump in and tell others to **** off if they have a problem with seeing it.
However it does make me feel sick, and Its not something I would do. We are all allowed our own POV.

[Looshkin]

I find it funny though, when I said something about the way of certain people living like animals, I got shot down...But now because it seems to help the 'other side's argument, its ok to say we are like animals....Funny....


:confused::confused:

No, I haven't changed to help 'the other side's argument' go read the thread again, I think you may be confused?

I'm not judging anyone for anything, like we hear all the damn time from FF'ers we do not know their exact circumstances, so lets not judge or make assumptions... oh unless someone is breastfeeding a 4..or 5..or 6.. or 7 year old.. that when my right to judge and say EWWWWWWWWWWW kicks in....?

I'm simply saying it totally sucks that the opinion that breastfeeding is 'gross' or worthy of a vomiting emoticon is totally rampant in our society - where as no one says, omg gross your kids and formula feeding ewww... or 'bloody hell your kids 8 and drinking cows breastmilk jeez that is almost beastiality its so wrong'

I added the later point that we are the only animals to drink *another species* breastmilk because it is simply true.

Anyway, I get what you're saying, but I don't think you get what I'm saying at all, so I'll leave it there.

[em1984]

Honestly in order to make people accept that breastfeeding is a normal and natural way to feed a child I don't think we (society) should be putting boundries on it according to your own preference.

Fair enough to not want to breastfeed or to want to stop at a certain age, but why should others have to do that?

Just my 2 cents worth.

That's a REALLY good point :yes: hadnt thought of it like that....

[~Temet Nosce~]

Oh so I suppose you would all have a completely normal, non startled reaction to accidentally running into your mother while she was stark naked or topless, because its allll natural baby :cool: so why should it bother anyone remembering drinking milk from your mum's breasts at 8 too, alll natural :cool:

:footinmouth:

[studyingECS]

Dont get me wrong I would in no way pull faces at some one if I saw the doing that in public. In fact I most likely would be the first person to jump in and tell others to **** off if they have a problem with seeing it.
However it does make me feel sick, and Its not something I would do. We are all allowed our own POV.

I wasn't referring to your post or anyone else's for that matter. Was just "thinking allowed" so to speak.:)

[PeppaH]

aww thats sad that you have such bad memories of it.



******************************

so what is the magic age then in every ones head?
What age do you consider to old?
I would have said younger but now thanks to this thread i am starting to think its purely based ont he child and mother in question.

I guess puberty is probably where it starts to interfere with the childs start of sexuality???

It doesnt help my dad to this dad says one of us (me or my sister) slipped in the shower and grabbed his penis and thats why its so big :barf: He is a great man...But I wish he would keep his mouth shut...

FOr me.... If I did BF I would stop after age one. Well I would start weaning by then. No where past age 2.
I probably wouldnt mind seeing a 4 or 5 year old BF....THough I would be just as uncomfortable around a newborn being BF as a 5 year old...Thats jsut me but I by no means show that Im uncomfy. I have been around people while they did and I was fine on the outside.

I just think, I was 10 years old when I got my periods so Im think that if this girl is still BF at that age.... I would be discusted at that even more :laughing: to say the least.....

[Blueberry Crumble]

We're more similar to animals than most people would care to admit. Imagine if someone was trying to hurt your child. You would probably go into 'mother bear' mode and do anything you could to save your child. Just about everything we do is based on our natual animal instincts, even down to flirting with the opposite sex ;)

I think I may go and take a dump out in the front yard and **** my leg up on a street post, whatya think? ;)

[nothanksbye]

Oh so I suppose you would all have a completely normal, non startled reaction to accidentally running into your mother stark naked, because its allll natural baby :cool: so why should it bother anyone remembering drinking milk from your mum's breasts at 8 too, alll natural :cool:

:footinmouth:

I see my gran naked every day! shes 90.:D

I have sen my MIL naked and shes seen me...

Nakedness dont bother me one little bit.

[faroutbrusselsprout]

I think everything you have said is so unfortunately valid.

You're right - At what point is it OK to say oh formula feeding DISGUSTING? Never? That's right because it's totally not ok.

Yet it's totally common for comments to be ew, disgusting, ew gross - in regards to breast feeding a newborn (from some women), breastfeeding a toddler (most of society) god forbid breastfeeding after 2... (unnatural sexually peverted)

I agree with phyllis here, it shows how brainwashed that breasts are for the enjoyment of men, our bodies are inherently sexual and so breastfeeding an older child is somehow sexually related.

I wonder if those saying 'ew' would feel any differently to expressed milk?
So why is it any different?

Obviously there must be insanely powerful health benefits, if breastmilk can be helpful in people with cancer

But it's increasingly upsetting to me, that doing what is natural in human bodies is seen as disgusting, because they are first sexual, and only second functional..

Oh and the animal thing, actually some elephants can breastfeed form their "aunties" as well as mothers after 5 years, but 2 years seems to be "the norm"
But I guess it's not perverted for them, because their breasts are not sexual.:confused:

I would never breastfeed my eight year old and would get a shock if someone whipped their boob out and started feeding their child at this age...

However I agree 100% with what you're saying.

I've just been conditioned by society to look at this as strange and unusual but when you really really get down to the core of it...it's natural for an animal (which we are) to feed their young.

(Can you imagine a monkey weaning their baby because they had reached a certain age....:confused:)

[Blueberry Crumble]

Breastfeeding an 8 year old in public should be natural. But sex is natural too, should we start doing that in public?

[Looshkin]

If thats what comes naturally to you jbelle, go for it.:)

[Blueberry Crumble]

If thats what comes naturally to you jbelle, go for it.:)

WhooHoo!

Unfortunately it is illegal :laughing:

[SorenLorensen]

i agree with kate :yes:

[nothanksbye]

Tysons mUMMY i so agree.

I often think we could learn so much about parenting form natural animal instinct.

We are spending so much money and time on trying to second guess natural instincts.

Its almost like as soon ans our bubs pop out we are trying to get them independent.
i jokingly say to DH that I parent DD like an Orangutan.

She gets carried everywhere, sleeps with me, bathes with me and feeds from me lol.

[BabelFish]

Chesby - I actually referred to frivolous reasons several times.

It's very common for people to read posts and let thier own insecurities dominate their reading.
Hehe - you're quite fond of the casual insult, aren't you?

You did indeed say it several times. Which was why in my post I stated that had you said it in the beginning, with your very first post, then perhaps it would not have been taken the wrong way.

I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old were your children when you weaned them? And also, for what reasons were they weaned? I.e. - did you wean them or did they self-wean? If they haven't reached 8 years of age yet and are not still breastfeeding, why is that?

And also, if you don't mind me asking, what are your reasons for being so incredibly anti-formula? I know that a lot of people are, and I understand that everybody knows and understands and accepts that breast is best, but I just wanted to know your personal reasons for being so vehement about it and therefore making others feel so rotten about turning to it if need be.

[PeppaH]

:confused::confused:

I added the later point that we are the only animals to drink *another species* breastmilk because it is simply true.

Anyway, I get what you're saying, but I don't think you get what I'm saying at all, so I'll leave it there.
:laughing: Probably not, I get conffussed easy. I wasnt saying *you* changed side, Im just saying that it seems that it changed peoples views on using the word and comparing us to animals, has changed since I used it last. I was getting shot down for using it once for comparing us to animals and now Im getting shot down for saying we arent like animal... Yeah....Its all a head **** to me.... I was going to say something else but forgot now...:rolleyes:

[Looshkin]

(Can you imagine a monkey weaning their baby because they had reached a certain age....:confused:)


No, I can't.
Monkeys seem to have done many things far better than all of our wisdom and technology have helped us to do.. seriously it's a worry when monkeys are outdoing us though.

[SorenLorensen]

Breastfeeding an 8 year old in public should be natural. But sex is natural too, should we start doing that in public?
what a total moo point.
BF = non sexual
sex = sexual

you cant relate the two, while both natural they are so very different....OHHhhhhh wait, no that is what is wrong with society and BF isn't it ;)

[PeppaH]

Oh so I suppose you would all have a completely normal, non startled reaction to accidentally running into your mother while she was stark naked or topless, because its allll natural baby :cool: so why should it bother anyone remembering drinking milk from your mum's breasts at 8 too, alll natural :cool:

:footinmouth:

I know its all natural, but for me, seeing people naked and seeing an 8 year old BF is gross. Dont get me wrong, I have no problem seeing my DF and DS naked, but thats it....I kinda have no choice seeing me naked unfortunately :laughing:

[~Temet Nosce~]

My post was tongue in cheek ;)

[Chunkydunks]

Its not something I'd do but meh.....each to their own.

[Blueberry Crumble]

Haha, Im not against breastfeeding in public at all. It IS natural. But to look at the funny side, can you imagine if we did everything natural to us in public without any inhibitions! There would be a lot of loud farting going on in shopping centres LOL

[nothanksbye]

Its such a society thing.

You have to get that baby out of your arms/bed/room
You need to pop bottles and teach them to feed themselves.

You should not carry them around as they learn to be manipulative..

and so on and so on.
We measure good parenting by independence and compliance.

Its a bit warped really.

[PeppaH]

My post was tongue in cheek ;)

Oh I could tell. Still I replied ;)

[dreamtobeamummy]

Haha, Im not against breastfeeding in public at all. It IS natural. But to look at the funny side, can you imagine if we did everything natural to us in public without any inhibitions! There would be a lot of loud farting going on in shopping centres LOL


too late.. LMAO!!

I too am not against breastfeeding in Public... But your right about doing everything natural to us in public.. That could be rather amusing :laughing: :p

[onabreak]

It is Disgusting and Disturbing! :no:

I agree.

That kid would be in grade 3 at school. So wrong.

[~Temet Nosce~]

going back a bit, but


Sure lets just let children decide when everything happens. Lets blame peoples disgust on the sexualisation of breasts. Oh come on, an 8 year old child does not need to breastfeed for comfort. The mother has let her child down plain and simple.

I'm all for breastfeeding, heck I breastfed DS till he was 18 months. But anything over 3-4 years old is unnesscessary and is for the mothers benefit not the child.

I agree with this. I am 100 percent pro breastfeeding. But an 8 year old, its just ridiculous. Using the 'its all natural etc etc' and 'you must have some problems of your own' etc. because I don't like the idea of an 8 yr old breastfeeding, well, just makes me :laughing:

[PeppaH]

Its such a society thing.

You have to get that baby out of your arms/bed/room
You need to pop bottles and teach them to feed themselves.

You should not carry them around as they learn to be manipulative..

and so on and so on.
We measure good parenting by independence and compliance.

Its a bit warped really.

What I think is that we all do what we want to do...Well most of us. I chose to bottle feed, I knew all the 'breast is best' cr@p that you hear of but I still did what I wanted to. Thats the beauty of being US, you dont (or shouldnt do) what everyone else says your should.
I dont care that breast is best, I dont care that people think this is better than that, or studies have said you shouldnt do this etc. I do it because I chose to and if everyone would jsut do what they choose to do without thinking people are going to look at them the wrong way, I think people would be much better off.:yelclap:

[Phyllis Stein]

Do you think that oe of the big issues is that we age our children?

we expect quite a lot from quite small humans?

like in all honesty an 8 year old s still a young child. They still need comfort and security.

But our society is big on independance.

:iagree:


What do I think of breastfeeding at 8?

:no: nooo way! Not for me and to be honest shouldn't be for anyone else either! FFS ...

And I'm not even going to bother explaining myself on why I find it wrong, I just do.

I'm all for 2, or 4, or 5, but 8, errrrr no.

You forgot to throw in a few of these -> :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

:p


So you think it's totally ok to drink another species breastmilk well into adulthood?

It seems pretty hypocritical, you know?

So then is the problem drinking directly from the breast, as obviously drinking another species breastmilk is socially acceptable..?

So it then is sexual, as the problem is the breast, not drinking expressed milk or an 8 year old having EBP on their cereal etc..?

:iagree:People seem to forget that cows milk is BREASTMILK. The willful hypocrisy never ceases to amaze me.


Sure lets just let children decide when everything happens. Lets blame peoples disgust on the sexualisation of breasts. Oh come on, an 8 year old child does not need to breastfeed for comfort. The mother has let her child down plain and simple.

I'm all for breastfeeding, heck I breastfed DS till he was 18 months. But anything over 3-4 years old is unnesscessary and is for the mothers benefit not the child.

LOL. The early feeding relationship is one of the most important periods of a child's life, where they learn trust and security. Allowing them to choose when they no longer need that relationship and are emotionally ready to move to a more independent existence is hardly allowing them to "decide when everything happens". In fact, most women who do full term feeding set boundaries around when they feed, how often etc.

And what "benefit" exactly do the mothers get from this? I know a fair few full term feeders and I can tell you, they find it annoying, frustrating, painful, irritating and inconvenient. They have people comparing them to paedophiles, ffs. The reward they do get is in their child's sense of security, the close, loving bond they have and the knowledge of the nutritional benefits the child is receiving.



My 7 year old showers with me and also DH. He doesnt look at us as sexual. He watched me breast feed DD and he doesnt thin its sexual.

Good point. There are many ways we inappropriately sexualise kids. Insinuating that their breastfeeding relationship is sexual is one of them.

[PeppaH]

going back a bit, but



I agree with this. I am 100 percent pro breastfeeding. But an 8 year old, its just ridiculous. Using the 'its all natural etc etc' and 'you must have some problems of your own' etc. because I don't like the idea of an 8 yr old breastfeeding, well, just makes me :laughing:

:iagree: I think people should be allowed there oppinons without people shooting them down for it. Obviously all bottle feeders have problems with breast feeders because they choose not to feed. Thats the adatude I see when we have arguments about breast feeding. If you dont like something that is natuarl, you have a problem :confused: Why is it so hard just to accept not everyone is the same?

[PeppaH]

LOL. The early feeding relationship is one of the most important periods of a child's life, where they learn trust and security. Allowing them to choose when they no longer need that relationship and are emotionally ready to move to a more independent existence is hardly allowing them to "decide when everything happens". In fact, most women who do full term feeding set boundaries around when they feed, how often etc.



I never understood the whole breast feeding promote a better relationship with the mother etc. I bottle fed since day one, I held him close to my chest when I did it etc etc We have a great relationship. I used to get so angry at the antenatle women for saying that, people seem to think that if you bottle feed you have the baby at arms length or on the chair next to you while feeding. So I dont see the big deal with if its breast or bottle in terms of the bonding.:no:
My son has only cows milk now not formula and he by no means isnt attached to me any more. He wants hugs all the time and he gets them. So to me he didnt miss out on anything that a breast milk child could of gotten. (apart from the breast milk that is)

[dreamtobeamummy]

What I think is that we all do what we want to do...Well most of us. I chose to bottle feed, I knew all the 'breast is best' cr@p that you hear of but I still did what I wanted to. Thats the beauty of being US, you dont (or shouldnt do) what everyone else says your should.
I dont care that breast is best, I dont care that people think this is better than that, or studies have said you shouldnt do this etc. I do it because I chose to and if everyone would jsut do what they choose to do without thinking people are going to look at them the wrong way, I think people would be much better off.:yelclap:


:iagree: 100 %
you all should do whats best for your child whether that be breast or bottle :thumbsup:

[SorenLorensen]

:iagree: I think people should be allowed there oppinons without people shooting them down for it. Obviously all bottle feeders have problems with breast feeders because they choose not to feed. Thats the adatude I see when we have arguments about breast feeding. If you dont like something that is natuarl, you have a problem :confused: Why is it so hard just to accept not everyone is the same?
all of us :confused:
im a FF and i think you will be pressed finding any posts of mine that are negative towards BF.

you are right with wondering why people just cant accept difference, because yep....we are not all the same ;)

[FiveInTheBed]

I think I may go and take a dump out in the front yard and **** my leg up on a street post, whatya think? ;)

..or flush that dump out into the same ocean we take our food from!!

:p



Re the OP.

Looking at the video the mother seems very pro extended Bfing , even with the little title "extraordinary breast feeding" popping up - means exactly that - this situation is EXTRA ORDINARY.
she is obviously trying to normalise breasts and breatfeeding with her children .

I cried the day my DS1 weaned at 15 months because I was pregnant with his twin brother & sister.
I fully supported my bestie who Bfed her dd til around the age of 3ish (she has LOADS of allegies)...one of the main reasons she weaned was because she found it exhausting.

My mum has (fond) memories of coming home from school at age 5 and lifting up her mums top for a feed.

I also cried the day I had to wean my twins at 9months (to save my sanity..because the society we live in demands so much of women and mothers).
but they still have a comfort bottle!! - they are two and a half....plenty would judge about that too I am sure! But it is 'their comfort' thing...yes they can drink from a cup and use utensils,,,but they are not ready to give up their bottle. so I won't make them.

If I had a child that still requested the boob at 8 - to be totally honest I don't know how I would feel - I would probably feel like it was another thing I had to do - another demand, because it can be tiring.
It by no means would be sexual!!

- my children snuggle close to my breast for comfort - I love it!

I also started a thread not long ago about showering with kids - and again I think it is when both parties become uncomfortable with it that it should stop.

I'm sure no-one is trying to tell another what to do and what is acceptable...but reading comments, hearing comments - negative comments in particular, can and do shape a person and the society they live in.

They girls in that clip don't look affected by it.:confused:

My ds1 (4)...points to my boobs and says, "they are your boobs mum, they are for feeding babies. I have little boobs - I don't feed babies with mine"

:goodvibes:

[Mrs Nietzsche]

I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old were your children when you weaned them? And also, for what reasons were they weaned? I.e. - did you wean them or did they self-wean? If they haven't reached 8 years of age yet and are not still breastfeeding, why is that?



I weaned my daughter when she was nearly 4 (very easy process at that age, just distracted her). I did it because I didn't want her going to school and getting teased.

I am breastfeeding my 11mth old still.

I am 'anti-formula' because I have spent hours and horus and hours reading scientific studies that all conclude that not breastfeeding carries risks. Breastfed children score higher in IQ tests. They have better blood pressure evn in adulthood. They are more protected in infancy from disease. It goes on, and on, and on.

Like anything, sometimes breastfeeding doesn't work, in which case thank god there's an alternative.

But nobody should choose not to breastfeed because they think that formula feeding is just as good. It's not. It never will be. And it is your right as a woman to have that fact available to you.

Breastfeeding is essentially a continuation of the life support system that a woman's body provides during gestation. So choosing not to breastfeed is like choosing to give birth 10 weeks early in a way - it's a premature cessation of maternal support to the infant.

Sometimes this happens despite everyone's best intentions.

However 'civilised' you might think human beings are - we evolved to be dependent on breastfeeding for an extended period of time. Just as we evolved to be dependent on iron, or vitamin C, or being bonded into a community, or whatever. It is really strange to read of people saying 'but we aren't animals, why should we breastfeed?". People in this thread have likened it to something 'dirty' like taking a dump, or killing someone. What a shame.
And what volumes that speaks of the discomfort women feel for one of the biological functions of thier own body - lactation.

No, humans aren't animals. We are more intelligent. We are scientists. We are anthropologists. We want a better world. For all those reasons we can use our brains, look at the research, and conclude that breastfeeding is best.

But all too often we don't.

[PeppaH]

all of us :confused:
im a FF and i think you will be pressed finding any posts of mine that are negative towards BF.

you are right with wondering why people just cant accept difference, because yep....we are not all the same ;)

I was being sarcastic ....:yelclap:

[Blueberry Crumble]

But nobody should choose not to breastfeed because they think that formula feeding is just as good. It's not. It never will be. And it is your right as a woman to have that fact available to you.



Iknow that this is another topic, but i wonder if thatis true?Ibet with science getting more progressive all the time, in 50-100 years, they may have formula exactly the same as breastmilk. WOuldnt that be great!

[Mrs Nietzsche]

They think that part of the reason that breastfed babies do so much better on cognitive and IQ tests is that breastfeeding promotes bonding and interaction (which enhances brain development).

There's also a link been recently established between SIDS and formula feeding.

The hydraulic action of breastfeeding improves lung volume and strength well into adulthood.

It's just not something that can be replaced with a formula, no matter how good.

[PeppaH]

I weaned my daughter when she was nearly 4 (very easy process at that age, just distracted her). I did it because I didn't want her going to school and getting teased.

I am breastfeeding my 11mth old still.

I am 'anti-formula' because I have spent hours and horus and hours reading scientific studies that all conclude that not breastfeeding carries risks. Breastfed children score higher in IQ tests. They have better blood pressure evn in adulthood. They are more protected in infancy from disease. It goes on, and on, and on.

Like anything, sometimes breastfeeding doesn't work, in which case thank god there's an alternative.

But nobody should choose not to breastfeed because they think that formula feeding is just as good. It's not. It never will be. And it is your right as a woman to have that fact available to you.

Breastfeeding is essentially a continuation of the life support system that a woman's body provides during gestation. So choosing not to breastfeed is like choosing to give birth 10 weeks early in a way - it's a premature cessation of maternal support to the infant.

Sometimes this happens despite everyone's best intentions.

However 'civilised' you might think human beings are - we evolved to be dependent on breastfeeding for an extended period of time. Just as we evolved to be dependent on iron, or vitamin C, or being bonded into a community, or whatever. It is really strange to read of people saying 'but we aren't animals, why should we breastfeed?". People in this thread have likened it to something 'dirty' like taking a dump, or killing someone. What a shame.
And what volumes that speaks of the discomfort women feel for one of the biological functions of thier own body - lactation.

No, humans aren't animals. We are more intelligent. We are scientists. We are anthropologists. We want a better world. For all those reasons we can use our brains, look at the research, and conclude that breastfeeding is best.

But all too often we don't.

Yes because as humans, we have choices. I wasnt BF but I by far have a much healthy immune system to alot of BF people i know of my age. Im never sick, I have one allergy, I dont have any diesese etc. Just because the studies show BF is better for children, I dont think that is a reason to look down on FF. People do what they think is best, even if they do it for selfish reason ie, the paretn having a mental breakdown due to BF, it might be 'selfish' because she is doing it for herself, but really, she is doing what is best.:confused: Im just shocked that for someone who gets sho angry at people who are discusted by this artical, you yourself can be so discusted by another persons choice.

[Skittles]

yeah sorry but nope. That doesnt sit right with me

[NonnyMouse]

I only read up to about page 5 before realising that this thread had strayed completely from the topic and onto some sort of breast v bottle debate between a few posters who I reckon all need to take a chill pill.

But, to answer the OP...

I don't like the idea of BF'ing an 8yr old and seeing it would no doubt make me feel rather uncomfortable.

Breastfeeding a baby - great.
Breastfeeding a 2 - 5yr old - great.
Breastfeeding a child who is half way through primary school, and nearly old enough to get periods - not great in my view.

Not because there is a sexual connotation to breasts being used this way and not because I find it disgusting or offensive. I simply see breastmilk as necessary food for babies and toddlers until they are old enough and with mature enough gut systems to get all their required nutrients in the form of actual food. When there is no longer a physical need to get sustenance from breastmilk, and the child has passed well and truly into 'school age', then it becomes a co-dependence issue. I would wonder if the mother was unwilling to let her child grow up. I would wonder if the child was insecure to be clinging to babyhood, despite what I assume would be terribl ragging from her peers about it (or would she keep as their little secret?).

[Phyllis Stein]

:laughing::laughing:

I find it hilarious that what started out as a beat up of full-term breastfeeding has turned into a defense of the beater-upperers "right" to choose what they want to do. Oh, the irony! :laughing:


I think I may go and take a dump out in the front yard and **** my leg up on a street post, whatya think? ;)

Yeh, excreting and breastfeeding. Same exact thing!


Breastfeeding an 8 year old in public should be natural. But sex is natural too, should we start doing that in public?

Of course, now it's sex and breastfeeding! Believe it or not, when I defend full term breastfeeding as 'natural', I do actually refer to full term breastfeeding. It's a bit of a red herring to extrapolate that therefore, everything natural = great. Nuance, peoples!!


I never understood the whole breast feeding promote a better relationship with the mother etc. I bottle fed since day one, I held him close to my chest when I did it etc etc We have a great relationship. I used to get so angry at the antenatle women for saying that, people seem to think that if you bottle feed you have the baby at arms length or on the chair next to you while feeding. So I dont see the big deal with if its breast or bottle in terms of the bonding.:no:
My son has only cows milk now not formula and he by no means isnt attached to me any more. He wants hugs all the time and he gets them. So to me he didnt miss out on anything that a breast milk child could of gotten. (apart from the breast milk that is)

Re-read my post, Peppa. I said feeding relationship, not breastfeeding. I'm a bottle feeder too and my son gets heaps of comfort from our "milky" cuddles. Though I also found (but some don't) that breastfeeding was a whole other level of connection, lactating hormones are powerful things that shouldn't be underestimated.

[PeppaH]

They think that part of the reason that breastfed babies do so much better on cognitive and IQ tests is that breastfeeding promotes bonding and interaction (which enhances brain development).

There's also a link been recently established between SIDS and formula feeding.

The hydraulic action of breastfeeding improves lung volume and strength well into adulthood.

It's just not something that can be replaced with a formula, no matter how good.

GOD dont get me started on sids :laughing: Nah, it just annoys me that you said that because SIDS is an unexplained death of an infant..>So if there is any link to Formula and SIDS it wouldnt be SIDS, because they would have an explaination :laughing: Right?

I believe though that maybe one day, there will be formula as good as breastmilk, either way I would still FF.

[BabelFish]

I weaned my daughter when she was nearly 4 (very easy process at that age, just distracted her). I did it because I didn't want her going to school and getting teased.

I am breastfeeding my 11mth old still.

I am 'anti-formula' because I have spent hours and horus and hours reading scientific studies that all conclude that not breastfeeding carries risks. Breastfed children score higher in IQ tests. They have better blood pressure evn in adulthood. They are more protected in infancy from disease. It goes on, and on, and on.

Like anything, sometimes breastfeeding doesn't work, in which case thank god there's an alternative.

But nobody should choose not to breastfeed because they think that formula feeding is just as good. It's not. It never will be. And it is your right as a woman to have that fact available to you.

Breastfeeding is essentially a continuation of the life support system that a woman's body provides during gestation. So choosing not to breastfeed is like choosing to give birth 10 weeks early in a way - it's a premature cessation of maternal support to the infant.

Sometimes this happens despite everyone's best intentions.

However 'civilised' you might think human beings are - we evolved to be dependent on breastfeeding for an extended period of time. Just as we evolved to be dependent on iron, or vitamin C, or being bonded into a community, or whatever. It is really strange to read of people saying 'but we aren't animals, why should we breastfeed?". People in this thread have likened it to something 'dirty' like taking a dump, or killing someone. What a shame.
And what volumes that speaks of the discomfort women feel for one of the biological functions of thier own body - lactation.

No, humans aren't animals. We are more intelligent. We are scientists. We are anthropologists. We want a better world. For all those reasons we can use our brains, look at the research, and conclude that breastfeeding is best.

But all too often we don't.
I can't believe I just agreed with everything you said! :D

There are always risks in life. You talk about feeling sorry for all the babies out there that never had breastmilk, and I agree. But I'm MORE sorry for all the children out there who are neglected, abused, abandoned, mistreated and unwanted and unloved. There are degrees of risk, and formula feeding is still beneficial and wonderful.

Formula feeding is not as good as breastfeeding, and nobody here is denying that, but it is still a wonderful gift for a mother to be able to formula feed her child and experience all the wonderful bonds and nurturing that that brings.

If I saw an eight-day old being bottlefed that's what I'd think, not `oh that poor neglected baby'. I'd probably think, `oh that poor Mum might well have gone through all the problems that I went through, I'm going to give her a smile and show her that it's lovely to see her bonding with and nurturing her child that way'.

Even though what you said earlier was intended to be hurtful, you were right. I am incredibly insecure about the fact that I feel I failed at breastfeeding, even though I did everything humanly possible to continue it. I would love the opportunity to have fed my DD until she is four, and am hoping that she will return to breastfeeding when my second child is born and I am hopefully able to breastfeed that one for as long as possible. I loved it so much, and was heartbroken when it ended, which was something that was out of my control.

But my daughter is happy, healthy, loved and absolutely cherished, and part of her happiness is due to the fact that we stopped having so many issues with feeding once she self-weaned.

Women out there who breastfeed AND who bottlefeed are riddled with insecurities because of the judgement of others. Instead of making blanket statements about which one is better and lumping everyone who does one or the other into the same basket, I agree with everyone else here who has said that the BEST choice is the one that is best for the baby and the mother in their own situation, and nobody else should make them feel bad about it.

[PeppaH]

Re-read my post, Peppa. I said feeding relationship, not breastfeeding. I'm a bottle feeder too and my son gets heaps of comfort from our "milky" cuddles. Though I also found (but some don't) that breastfeeding was a whole other level of connection, lactating hormones are powerful things that shouldn't be underestimated.
I knwo what you wrote, I wasnt haveing a go at YOU. Im jsut saying that I never understood when people said breastfeeding is better for bonding. Just your post reminded me of it.

[FiveInTheBed]

GOD dont get me started on sids :laughing: Nah, it just annoys me that you said that because SIDS is an unexplained death of an infant..>So if there is any link to Formula and SIDS it wouldnt be SIDS, because they would have an explaination :laughing: Right?

I believe though that maybe one day, there will be formula as good as breastmilk, either way I would still FF.

they have many eplanations for it!
It is 'sudden' not unexplained.

:confused:

[Mrs Nietzsche]

Perhaps you should google it Peppah.

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/T102100.asp

Excerpt:

A study from New Zealand shows that SIDS was three times higher in babies who were not breastfed. The risk factor for SIDS from not breastfeeding was even higher than from maternal smoking.

http://www.sids.org/nprevent.htm

7. Breast-feed babies whenever possible. Breast milk decreases the occurrence of respiratory and gastrointestinal infections. Studies show that breast-fed babies have a lower SIDS rate than formula-fed babies do.

http://blacktating.blogspot.com/2009/03/breastfeeding-reduces-sids-risk-by-50.html

http://www.vancouversun.com/Health/Breastfeeding+linked+reduced+risk+SIDS+study/1344893/story.html

Excerpt:

NEW YORK - Women who breastfeed lower the chances that their baby might die of sudden infant death syndrome or SIDS, according to a German study.
Dr. M. M. Vennemann, from the University of Munster, and colleagues said they believe that based on their findings women should be encouraged to breastfeed their infants for six months to reduce the risk of SIDS, which is also known as cot death.
These results add “to the body of evidence showing that breastfeeding reduces the risk of SIDS, and that this protection continues as long as the infant is breastfed,” Vennemann said.

[Sunnygal]

When I look at the video I don't see a 'perverted mum, and dependant child' I see a mother comforting and providing for her child!
Would I breastfeed and 8 year old - probably not, but I also never thought I would still be breastfeeding my 20mth old :goodvibes:

[PeppaH]

they have many eplanations for it!
It is 'sudden' not unexplained.

:confused:

Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) is the "sudden death of an infant under one year of age which remains unexplained after a thorough case investigation, including performance of a complete autopsy, examination of the death scene, and review of the clinical history

Its unexplained. Thats why it ticks me off so much when I got told by people "Dont do this because it will course SIDS" etc. You know what I mean??:confused:

[Phyllis Stein]

Iknow that this is another topic, but i wonder if thatis true?Ibet with science getting more progressive all the time, in 50-100 years, they may have formula exactly the same as breastmilk. WOuldnt that be great!

Not a chance, even scientists in the field have accepted that. Breastmilk is not 'one' substance, it's many, continually changing, evolving to the child's specific needs. It contains stem cells, as well as highly specific blends of bacteria and enzymes along with heaps of unidentified constituents. Humans aren't even close to an artificial equivalent and I truly can't see how we ever will be.

[PeppaH]

Perhaps you should google it Peppah.

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/T102100.asp

Excerpt:

A study from New Zealand shows that SIDS was three times higher in babies who were not breastfed. The risk factor for SIDS from not breastfeeding was even higher than from maternal smoking.

http://www.sids.org/nprevent.htm

7. Breast-feed babies whenever possible. Breast milk decreases the occurrence of respiratory and gastrointestinal infections. Studies show that breast-fed babies have a lower SIDS rate than formula-fed babies do.

http://blacktating.blogspot.com/2009/03/breastfeeding-reduces-sids-risk-by-50.html

http://www.vancouversun.com/Health/Breastfeeding+linked+reduced+risk+SIDS+study/1344893/story.html

Excerpt:

NEW YORK - Women who breastfeed lower the chances that their baby might die of sudden infant death syndrome or SIDS, according to a German study.
Dr. M. M. Vennemann, from the University of Munster, and colleagues said they believe that based on their findings women should be encouraged to breastfeed their infants for six months to reduce the risk of SIDS, which is also known as cot death.
These results add “to the body of evidence showing that breastfeeding reduces the risk of SIDS, and that this protection continues as long as the infant is breastfed,” Vennemann said.

Whats your point? Im saying that SIDS is an unexplained death. So just because its higher in FF babies, has nothing to do with what Im saying. Im saying its an unexplained death.

[Mrs Nietzsche]

You can take the horse to water, but you can't make her drink.

[beebs]

Oh yes, here we go. All of us terrible, awful mothers who neglected our children so terribly that we gave them a bottle at 8 days of age. You know why I did? Because my birth was so traumatic and I lost so much blood that my milk didn't come in for seven days, my baby was starving and jaundiced, and I had to give her a bottle for her own health.

I spent seven months of my life when she was born doing everything I possibly could, in every way, to breastfeed. We made it to seven months breastfeeding because of sheer hard work, persistence, blood, sweat and mountains of tears and there is no way someone should come on here and make such a thoughtless, casual, backhanded insult to those of us who tried so hard and yet gave our babies bottles at some points for their own good.

Ahh the joys of hearing about the evils of bottlefeeding from someone who obviously doesn't have a clue what its like not to be able to breastfeed and the feeling of devastation it causes and the guilt ,axiety and worry that you are not giving your baby something that is natural....yaayyy - and here I was thinking that this was a pretty cruisy saturday on the hub:confused:

Chesby - I wouldn't worry about it - I think you did an amazing job to pesevere - good on you!! I know what you mean about backhanded and insenstive comments on the hub. You gotta love it. not.

[FiveInTheBed]

Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) is the "sudden death of an infant under one year of age which remains unexplained after a thorough case investigation, including performance of a complete autopsy, examination of the death scene, and review of the clinical history

Its unexplained. Thats why it ticks me off so much when I got told by people "Dont do this because it will course SIDS" etc. You know what I mean??:confused:

the death is ufortunately unexplained -but has many contributing factors that over time have been linked ...that can be avioded.

certain things won't 'cause' sids, but may put a baby at risk.

(apologies for taking the thread of track again)

[Areca]

To answer the OP

4 years ago if this was posted I would've been on the 'that's disgusting, it's perverse, she's doing it for herself and those poor kids are suffering' bandwagon.

However, now that I've educated myself on breastfeeding and breastfed my own babies I am no longer part of that bandwagon. To see an 8 year old breastfeeding still weirds me out TBH but I know it's because of the general view of society. If the mother is still happy to be breastfeeding her child at 8 years age then more power to her. I can't ever see myself breatfeeding an 8 year old (don't think I'd get far past two tbh because I get to the point where I'm 'over it') but I know it's not my place to judge and I know enough now to know that there are benefits to it and that it's most definitely not for the mother's benefit, nor could she be 'forcing' her child to breastfeed.

[Kizmet]

This will be closed if it doesn't calm down people

Let's just stick to the OP



(Sorry pink ladies seems my pinkness hasnt fully worn off yet :o:laughing:)

[Looshkin]

Why does it always have to be personal?
Why can't we ever have a discussion about the reality - the facts - without having the thread locked because someone is hurting?

I am interested in learning about these facts. I had no idea about some of the information posted so far.

And I think we are doing a discredit to anyone currently TTC, currently pregnant, currently considering formula before even trying BFing for no reason at all - like I read all the time - or not looking into everything that could go wrong, and having all the facts.

I think sharing the knowledge is important here, but I understand it's a fine line between discussing and upsetting someone.
But discussing it isn't to make anyone feel bad, it's so we all know what the truth is. right??

I don't want to stick my head in the sand and refuse to discuss the facts because I'm scared of upsetting someone with the truth.

[Areca]

Why does it always have to be personal?
Why can't we ever have a discussion about the reality - the facts - without having the thread locked because someone is hurting?

I am interested in learning about these facts. I had no idea about some of the information posted so far.

And I think we are doing a discredit to anyone currently TTC, currently pregnant, currently considering formula before even trying BFing for no reason at all - like I read all the time - or not looking into everything that could go wrong, and having all the facts.

I think sharing the knowledge is important here, but I understand it's a fine line between discussing and upsetting someone.
But discussing it isn't to many anyone feel bad, it's so we all know what the truth is.

I don't want to stick my head in the sand and refuse to discuss the facts because I'm scared of upsetting someone with the truth.

:iagree: It's threads like these that made me change my mind on the whole thing...seeing the facts in the raw like that...whilst I still would've disagreed until I was blue in the face during that actual debate I went away, thought about it some more and was made to question my thoughts on subjects like these.
It's a shame that threads like these constantly end up closed...there's so much information to obtain from them, even if it does just seem like it's going around in circles at the time.

[~Temet Nosce~]

Why is this being turned into another bf vs ff debate? :confused:

Yes we all know breast is best for babies, infants and toddlers.

an 8 year old does not need the nutritional benefits of breastmilk. They would have gotten all the goodness they need to get a good start in life, and by 8 years old, they should have well and truly 'started life'

I would find it just as weird seeing an 8 year old drinking formula from a bottle. Because there is simply no need for it.

[Oya]

:sleeping:

Good on her, what a selfless thing to give her child for so long. Legend in my eyes, I don't think i could BF for that long but I wish I had this womans endurance and strength. What a gift!

[PeppaH]

Why does it always have to be personal?
Why can't we ever have a discussion about the reality - the facts - without having the thread locked because someone is hurting?

I am interested in learning about these facts. I had no idea about some of the information posted so far.

And I think we are doing a discredit to anyone currently TTC, currently pregnant, currently considering formula before even trying BFing for no reason at all - like I read all the time - or not looking into everything that could go wrong, and having all the facts.

I think sharing the knowledge is important here, but I understand it's a fine line between discussing and upsetting someone.
But discussing it isn't to make anyone feel bad, it's so we all know what the truth is. right??

I don't want to stick my head in the sand and refuse to discuss the facts because I'm scared of upsetting someone with the truth.

I have no problem discussing the facts, its just when like you said get personall. The fact is the OP ask for our thoughts, so I said it discust me, then when people say that, they get shot down and THEN it becomes personal. I dont like people making a big deal out of other peoples choices. The fact is, everyone (most) know that breast is best, so I dont see the point in discussing that because it is a known fact. People just get so peeve at people who find something disusting.

[Areca]

I would find it just as weird seeing an 8 year old drinking formula from a bottle. Because there is simply no need for it.

Who says? would you frown upon a mother giving her 8 year old formula if they had allergies that prevented them from getting all the nutrients they need in their diet? Doubtfully so.
Would you look down upon an 8 year who still took a teddy to bed for comfort? Unlikely.

Who's to say that for this 8 year old (or any other 8 year old that is still breastfeeding) the breastmilk isn't providing her with nutrition that she can't get from elsewhere? Why is it so bad that this 8 year old drinks from her mother's breast for comfort instead of clinging on to a teddy bear?

Is it because there are breasts involved? If it is then that is purely the sexualisation of breasts that have made seeing an 8 year old breastfeed seem so wrong. and that is why it's important to question yourself (not you personally Amethyst but anyone who is finding this to be so disgusting) as to exactly why it is. If you actually look at the comfort factor, or if you look at the nutritional benefits (I know my 8 year old niece, whilst she has no allergies, she has a shocking diet due to her own refusal of foods...bet she could benefit from some extra nutrients) then the only thing that makes it 'wrong' is soceity's views on the topic.

[Looshkin]

The fact is the OP ask for our thoughts, so I said it discust me

I dont like people making a big deal out of other peoples choices.

People just get so peeve at people who find something disusting.

You can see the hypocrisy there right?

"I don't like people judging me for my decisions..

But what *she's doing* - *thats* disgusting ":barf:

Peppa you can see how that could be seen as ott hypocritical right?

You're right - this is OT I'll start a new thread.
Because I know breast is best too - I hear it on here a zillion times - but why?
What are all the reasons? I dunno..
But I want to.:yes:

[ManekiNeko]

I am sure everyone here has been judged at some point for something they did because they love their children. I don't understand how one who experiences that kind of judgement can inturn turn around and cast a finger of judgement at a mother nurturing her child. Sure it's not somehting all of us do but who are we to say what's right or wrong if it is in the name ove love and nurturement. I think anything that is done for the better of a child is positive. Really ppl who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones or Let he who has not sined cast the first stone.

[battlecrumpet]

Back to OP....
I think BFing an 8-year-old is beautiful. If both mum and daughter enjoy it, and it's good for the daughter nutritionally, and obviously good for their bonding, it's great, good on them all.

[nothanksbye]

Instead of attacking each others choices, we could look at ways of understanding why some women do feel the need to breastfeed for a longer time.

would an anxious child benefit from the extra bonding?
does it help the child to relax into a state that we often lose?


any one else?

[PeppaH]

You can see the hypocrisy there right?

"I don't like people judging me for my decisions..

But what *she's doing* - *thats* disgusting ":barf:

Peppa you can see how that could be seen as ott hypocritical right?

You're right - this is OT I'll start a new thread.
Because I know breast is best too - I hear it on here a zillion times - but why?
What are all the reasons? I dunno..
But I want to.:yes:

Thats not judging, thats just saying I dont like it and its not for me. If I was judging I would say somethign like "How could a mother do such a discusting thing to her child" I just think its gross that she is breasting feed a 8 year old. But it is her choice and Im not saying that she is wrong to do so.

[Cicho]

I think it's a mummy issue :yes:

I would not do it but meh, each to their own

[nothanksbye]

Thats not judging, thats just saying I dont like it and its not for me. If I was judging I would say somethign like "How could a mother do such a discusting thing to her child" I just think its gross that she is breasting feed a 8 year old. But it is her choice and Im not saying that she is wrong to do so.

hun read your post back to yourself.;)

Its not nice to call a choice disgusting or gross.

For example it woud be nicer to say its not something i would choose to do.

You dont need to labe it something...IYKWIM?

[~Temet Nosce~]

Instead of attacking each others choices, we could look at ways of understanding why some women do feel the need to breastfeed for a longer time.

would an anxious child benefit from the extra bonding?
does it help the child to relax into a state that we often lose?


any one else?
I think all that extra bonding could quite possibly contribute to anxiety issues.

Might come back later and explain that one a bit more, but at the moment :sleeping: I really need to get some cleaning done lol.

[PeppaH]

hun read your post back to yourself.;)

Its not nice to call a choice disgusting or gross.

For example it woud be nicer to say its not something i would choose to do.

You dont need to labe it something...IYKWIM?

I still dont think Im judgeing her or her kid. All I said is that I think it is gross. Like I have said I think it is gross to breast feed in general, doesnt by any means mean Im judging breast feeders. I just dont think its a plessent thing to see or do. How is that judging? I know breast is best, I formula feed I dont judge myself because I FF and not breast feed though.

[nothanksbye]

I still dont think Im judgeing her or her kid. All I said is that I think it is gross. Like I have said I think it is gross to breast feed in general, doesnt by any means mean Im judging breast feeders. I just dont think its a plessent thing to see or do. How is that judging? I know breast is best, I formula feed I dont judge myself because I FF and not breast feed though.

I think its a whoel other thread babe! maybe start one on judging?

[PeppaH]

I think its a whoel other thread babe! maybe start one on judging?

Why? To get shot down even more so just because I dont think the same as other people? No thanks :no:

[Oya]

Why? To get shot down even more so just because I dont think the same as other people? No thanks :no:

Maybe a little tact? Or use less offensive terms if you can't handle being 'shot down'.

[Pax]

I'm just glad it isnt my boobs! :yes:

[cja]

better an 8 year old on the boob than a 8 day old on a bottle.

I think this statement is offensive.:thumbsdown:

It is fine to say that you think an 8yr old breastfeeding is OK, but there is no need to bring in a criticism of bottle feeding.:no:

[Skittles]

:iagree: with cja. Thats not called for at all

[Pax]

I think this statement is offensive.:thumbsdown:

It is fine to say that you think an 8yr old breastfeeding is OK, but there is no need to bring in a criticism of bottle feeding.:no:
:iagree:

its a shame this turned into a make the FF'ers guilty session.

[tyler's mum]

I think this statement is offensive.:thumbsdown:

It is fine to say that you think an 8yr old breastfeeding is OK, but there is no need to bring in a criticism of bottle feeding.:no:

:iagree::iagree:

[maisymum]

I have a 6 & an 8 year old.....The thought of them breastfeeding off me just seems a bit Ewwwwwww!........But each to their own i suppose.....but still Yuk :barf:

[Areca]

:iagree:

its a shame this turned into a make the FF'ers guilty session.

Threads on breastfeeding ALWAYS turn in to a FF vs BF debate because someone somewhere gets offended. If it wasn't Maire's comment it would be something else that sets it off.

[Mrs Nietzsche]

Yet it was fine for multiple posters to say it was disgusting to feed an 8 year old :rolleyes:

The fact of the matter is - there are far greater risks to an 8 day old being fed formula, than an 8 year old breastfeeding.

Fact.

[bada]

better an 8 year old on the boob than a 8 day old on a bottle. Nice one!

Each to their own. It's nobody else's business. Why should anyone else care, not your boobs not your kid.


ETA crikey so many pages! I have a lot of reading to do!

[Pax]

Yet it was fine for multiple posters to say it was disgusting to feed an 8 year old :rolleyes:

The fact of the matter is - there are far greater risks to an 8 day old being fed formula, than an 8 year old breastfeeding.

Fact.

but those members that said that might not have been FF mums either!

some BF mums would find it 'disgusting'

some FF mums might not..

didnt need to be assuming and then tit for tat is all

and i dont have to be a know it all either :laughing: so i am backing out of here...

[Cicho]

Nice one!

Each to their own. It's nobody else's business. Why should anyone else care, not your boobs not your kid.

Well said.

If only that applied to every aspect of life :laughing::laughing:

(EG cloth/sposies, co sleeping etc!) :yelclap:

[beebs]

Yet it was fine for multiple posters to say it was disgusting to feed an 8 year old :rolleyes:

The fact of the matter is - there are far greater risks to an 8 day old being fed formula, than an 8 year old breastfeeding.

Fact.

Not if you can't breastfeed and then your baby starves to death and then you are up on neglect and murder charges....FACT formula is better than letting your child go hungry. So I guess the fact is that it depends on the circumstance no? And good on you Maire for having boobs that work. I think I need to ask the big man for a refund on mine.

[Mrs Nietzsche]

but those members that said that might not have been FF mums either!

some BF mums would find it 'disgusting'

some FF mums might not..



How is any of that relevant? Who cares?

The fact of the matter is - we should be using our energy trying to get breastfeeding rates up - something that is proven to *save lives* rather than gasping at someone else feeding their child at 8.

I'm sorry but pretending that formula feeding doesn't have risks because of the fear of someone having hurt feelings does no one any favours.

I will say it again.

Breastfeeding an 8 year old does not carry risks.

Artificially feeding an 8 day old does.

[Mrs Nietzsche]

Beebs I actually said numerous times that it is good formula exists for those times that it is needed.

[cja]

Yet it was fine for multiple posters to say it was disgusting to feed an 8 year old :rolleyes:

The fact of the matter is - there are far greater risks to an 8 day old being fed formula, than an 8 year old breastfeeding.

Fact.

Marie, I think you have missed the point that your original comment was offensive to formula feeders.

Why don't you state your opinion without being critical of other people's feeding choices... it is great to hear peoples opinion on bubhub....but you don't need to criticise other people's choices when giving your opinion.

[Mrs Nietzsche]

I'm sorry?

I can't understand that at all.

It is fine for people to liken extended breastfeeding to taking a dump in public, blah blah blah.

But I can't point out the well proven scientific fact that feeding a 8 day old baby has risks?

Honestly, we have huge problems if that is the case.

A bit of perspective please. Formula feeding is *not* the best. Breastfeeding rates *can* improve. Normalising formula is *not* the way to improve the health of babies or mothers.

If someone *chooses* to feed their child something that is not the best for their long-term or immediate health, then I think it's very important that they do so with all the available information.

I can't change the science to suit people's feelings - artificial feeding has risks!

[readytogo]

......... decided not worth it some people must live by ignorance is bliss





and for note I FF and BF so not side taking either way

[Lily_Pad]

I've read over this whole thread and...


I'm sorry?

I can't understand that at all.

It is fine for people to liken extended breastfeeding to taking a dump in public, blah blah blah.

But I can't point out the well proven scientific fact that feeding a 8 day old baby has risks?

Honestly, we have huge problems if that is the case.

A bit of perspective please. Formula feeding is *not* the best. Breastfeeding rates *can* improve. Normalising formula is *not* the way to improve the health of babies or mothers.

If someone *chooses* to feed their child something that is not the best for their long-term or immediate health, then I think it's very important that they do so with all the available information.

I can't change the science to suit people's feelings - artificial feeding has risks!

No you can't change that.
And yes you can point those facts out.

But, public forum or not, you could be a little more considerate of other peoples' feelings with the way you state your opinion and those facts.

Anyway, for me personally, I would not bf my 8 year old. I find it gross. But if that woman wants to and she's happy and her daughter's happy who am I to say she shouldn't be doing that. What does it matter to me what she does with her children. Not my boobs, not my kids, not my life.

:)

[talia11]

I personally think it is weird at that age.
Absolutely no reason for a child fo that age to be BF - and the ramifications I believe for that child's social development are more parmount than the benefits it may still be getting from breast milk.

[spoon]

It is weird and I think the mother has some serious issues still breastfeeding a child at 8 years of age.:no: yuck.

[Mrs Nietzsche]

The point is this....

Instead of thinking it's weird to see someone breastfeeding a (much) older child - think about how it's weird that we just accept that such huge numbers of people choose not to feed thier newborns.

Breastfeeding has become so far away from being the normal behaviour that we evolved to do that we never assume people are breastfeeding... we ask 'are you breastfeeding?' or, 'are you still breastfeeding?' etc.

Why is feeding an 8 year old weird but artificially feeding an 8 day old normal?

[beebs]

Why is feeding an 8 year old weird but artificially feeding an 8 day old normal?

Who are theses people you speak of? I personallly dont konw anyone who bottlefed except myself for medical reasons and my friend who lives in a hippy community also for medical reasons and we both struggled with Bfing for months...i've never known anyone in real life who chose to ff without reason - be it medical or premmie babies or no milk supply- so I don;'t see it as normal at all.

[Jezzy]

Its not for me, but that is probably societies conditioning of me.

I think it is admirable that people want to increase the awareness of the benefits of BF short term or long term, I just find it a little sad that a group of intelligent women can not accept that for whatever reason we are all different and not make personal judgements about others choices.

[nothanksbye]

wow..

there are only 3 breastfeeders left in my mums group.

out of over 20 women.

they are all 10 week old bubs!

[~Temet Nosce~]

Why is feeding an 8 year old weird but artificially feeding an 8 day old normal?
because breast milk and artificial milk, are made for babies, not 8 year olds.

I WOULD think its strange that an 8 year old drank artificial baby milk too, even if they were intolerant and lacking stuff in diet, because there are supplements that are made for children and adults, each meeting seperate energy needs etc.

Also, this 8 year old in question is clearly healthy and nothing wrong with her, so why the need for breast milk.

[Mrs Nietzsche]

Beebs - I am surprised that you haven't seen on Bubhub many many people saying they find breastfeeding disgusting, that they choose to formula feed, breastfeeding is not for them, etc etc etc (including in this thread I think).

[spoon]

And in addition to that, if I knew of someone in real life who was doing it I would not want to be around them.

Maire, your points about bottlefeeding are not really working. I get the whole think outside the square yadda yadda but a mother who is bottlefeeding her child is not doing her untold damage the way you all rant on about.

Feeding a child at 8 is not the best thing for the child at all. It is wierd.

[Lily_Pad]

It's normal because so many people don't get the kind of support and help they need when they start breastfeeding.
Breastfeeding is hard at the start when you've never done it before.
Formula is readily available and advertised all the time as being so good for babies.
It's just the way society's evolved.
I was the first person in my family to breastfeed and I stopped at 4 months.
Even if formula was not available and everyone breastfed, I hardly think anyone would still be breastfeeding at 8 years old.

[Mrs Nietzsche]

Amethyst - the idea that breastmilk is made only for babies is a *cultural* notion, not an objective fact.

The benefits of extended breastfeeding are well documented, and the natural age of weaning is estimated to be 4-7 years of age, based on anthropological studies and best comparisons with other mammals.

[talia11]

The point is this....

Instead of thinking it's weird to see someone breastfeeding a (much) older child - think about how it's weird that we just accept that such huge numbers of people choose not to feed thier newborns.

Breastfeeding has become so far away from being the normal behaviour that we evolved to do that we never assume people are breastfeeding... we ask 'are you breastfeeding?' or, 'are you still breastfeeding?' etc.

Why is feeding an 8 year old weird but artificially feeding an 8 day old normal?


Sorry but your comment has nothing to do with the OP...this was a question about BF an 8 year old not a baby.

You can go off on a tangent all you like -but the crux of this discussion is about the above and nothing else - I am pretty much sure by now everyone is well-versed in pros/cons of BF vs FF so is there really a need to druge it all up again???

[Mummy2R&K]

Maire, regardless of how a baby is fed, at least they are fed!

Sure formula rates are rising, but with the pressures and stress of TRYING to breastfeed and the anxiety it causes mums these days (at the moment me and my best friend included!!), what is more important I believe is a happy mother, because that means a happy baby!

Would you rather a mother feel resentful towards their baby because of the pain, the fussiness breastfeeding can cause?

No I think not.

[HeidiLee]

I'm sorry?

I can't understand that at all.

It is fine for people to liken extended breastfeeding to taking a dump in public, blah blah blah.

But I can't point out the well proven scientific fact that feeding a 8 day old baby has risks?

Honestly, we have huge problems if that is the case.

A bit of perspective please. Formula feeding is *not* the best. Breastfeeding rates *can* improve. Normalising formula is *not* the way to improve the health of babies or mothers.

If someone *chooses* to feed their child something that is not the best for their long-term or immediate health, then I think it's very important that they do so with all the available information.

I can't change the science to suit people's feelings - artificial feeding has risks!

I formula fed my 8 day old baby. He has grown up perfectly healthy. I dont feel bad about it and I dont care what you think about it.

I also think breastfeeding an 8 year old and having the child have names for your breasts is absolutely disgusting.

[Looshkin]

because breast milk and artificial milk, are made for babies, not 8 year olds.

I WOULD think its strange that an 8 year old drank artificial baby milk too, even if they were intolerant and lacking stuff in diet, because there are supplements that are made for children and adults, each meeting seperate energy needs etc.

Also, this 8 year old in question is clearly healthy and nothing wrong with her, so why the need for breast milk.


ooh I'm playing devils advocate here..:p
But what about cows milk?
totally normal.. so we mustn't need that..
although I've heard (even on some crappy add advertising ice cream) about how important dairy is..
So I think maybe breast milk could still be healthy and useful... you could almost say essential, in that we supplement it with another species breastmilk and market it as essential to development?

Also that cancer thing,People drinking (human) breast milk..which makes sense now that Phyllis informed us of the stem cells ..you know?
So in that sense, if growing children still need supplements from dairy- or let's be honest - another species breastmilk - why not human?
I know the formula adds I've seen say - oh they still need this for immune system until at least 3.. so formula is normalised, but out of a cup, but then breastmilk.. well I bet you a similar amount of people would say ew or gross about breastfeeding a 3 year old.. simply because it looks different to what we're used to seeing..

So while I can understand the point of them being socially 'weird' because they are drinking from the breast, it would seem that if we weren't this society that over sexualises children and sees women as boobs that are firstly sexual,and functional and nurturing as an afterthought maybe it's possible if you were taken away from that, it could be more normal.

[nothanksbye]

:hair::hair::geek::thumbsdown::crying:

[Mathermy]

Amethyst - the idea that breastmilk is made only for babies is a *cultural* notion, not an objective fact.

The benefits of extended breastfeeding are well documented, and the natural age of weaning is estimated to be 4-7 years of age, based on anthropological studies and best comparisons with other mammals.

Maire, I ask this with no disrespect or sarcasm or anything like that I am still really unsure how I feel about it or why I feel that way so have been keeping my stoopid mouth shut and just reading...

do you think there is ever an age that is too old? It's hard for me to consider at what age a child might naturally self-wean because in most cases the mother seems to intervene and I keep sitting here wondering if society wasn't what it is and we were all left to our own devices would adult breastfeeding be the norm do you think?

I'm not making a leap from 8 yr old to adult to be sarcastic, I am aware that there are many years in between but as someone pointed out before the "norm" ranges to about 7, and 8 isn't far beyond that but if a child isn't showing any signs of weaning at 8 then who is to say when they might decide to stop?

I would have thought convenience and factors like school and friendships etc would make the need for teenage BF unlikely but if you took these factors away do you think we would just feed forever?

If they are not ready at 8 even with the above factors coming into play then why would 10, 11, 12 be so substantially different? What happens do you think in those years that makes the difference?

I find it all very confusing but fascinating :detective:

[beebs]

Beebs - I am surprised that you haven't seen on Bubhub many many people saying they find breastfeeding disgusting, that they choose to formula feed, breastfeeding is not for them, etc etc etc (including in this thread I think).

I have - but you must admit its a very small minority. One or two spring to my mind. Maybe I'm just not in the right threads?

[StrawberryTheMilkshake]

I didnt read through all the threads (too many). Im not going to jump on the bandwagon of breast/ bottle feeding.

I believe that each mother chooses to do what works best for her baby and herself. If thats breast or bottle feeding, who cares? Who are we to judge?

I watched the video.

I wonder if the little girl at 8 is still benefiting from the breast milk as a younger child would nutritionally?

I figure (and NO im not saying that its wrong, etc, its just an opinion)- that at 8 the child *should* be getting the nutrients she needs from food, etc, and therefore the NEED for breast milk should be lessened?

For fear of putting my foot in my mouth, im going to stop here. Im just wondering about the nutritional value for the little girl. Would breast milk continue to be very nutritious?

And no im not judging, saying its wrong, etc, just asking a couple of quesitons.

[reAllytee]

Cant be bothered reading the entire thread but may come back & do so when I dont feel the need to hit my computer.

The first few pages were enough to see why so many breastfeeders keep hiding when b/f a toddler ...

Cant believe people are that fooled that feeding a child breastmilk is 'bad' somehow yet weaning them onto cows milk is ok ...

Seriously.

Why should a mum express into a cup just because a child gets to a certain age ... For one many cant express & what so because of this the child should be denied the best stuff available ????

Seriously.


talia11 - What Marie is trying to point to is that were we in many other countries around the world who have fantastic b/f rates no one would bat an eyelid it would just be " oh b/f child " instead there are *gross* comments & the likes.

I find it very very sad.

[Mathermy]

hmmm, still thinking :o

I think what I asked before was a bit dense right? because other animals all wean eventually so why would human beings be the only ones to continue? But what makes other animals wean? I'm assuming it has nothing to do with them thinking BF is gross:rolleyes::laughing: I still wonder if left to our own devices when we might stop and why..

[Looshkin]

Malol, maybe when we no longer need it and get everything we need from what we can eat..? In the same way our bodies tell us what we need to eat if we listen? (like nutritional cravings?)
As in, don't need to supplement another species breastmilk, like dairy, and are getting enough calcium, protein, other vitamins (and etc) from what we eat?
I saw elephants having a breastfeed from "auntie" (assumed role) or other non related elephants (when the said elephant would allow it) when they were unwell or injured.. but they weren't super old elephants..

[Sunnygal]

For fear of putting my foot in my mouth, im going to stop here. Im just wondering about the nutritional value for the little girl. Would breast milk continue to be very nutritious?

Human milk contains things like fatty acids (for the brain), fat soluable vitamins, vitamins A, D, E, K, C, riboflavin, niacin, enzymes, carbs and heaps heaps heaps more :ecomcity:... So I reckon breastmilk would never stop being beneficial, like a super vitamin milkshake :D

[Looshkin]

Maybe we would live longer and not get cancer and as many diseases if we did, it'd be an interesting study, considering the potential in people ingesting it who already have cancer, perhaps it would have added benefits in prevention..
Well maybe just drinking it expressed though... to not disgust society and all that..

[Mathermy]

Malol, maybe when we no longer need it and get everything we need from what we can eat..? In the same way our bodies tell us what we need to eat if we listen? (like nutritional cravings?)
As in, don't need to supplement another species breastmilk, like dairy, and are getting enough calcium from what we eat?
I saw elephants having a breastfeed from "auntie" (assumed role) or other non related elephants (when the said elephant would allow it) when they were unwell or injured.. but they weren't super old elephants..

Thanks for answering me!:goodvibes: I was afraid I was bout to get yelled at for being too stoopid!:o

So what do you think makes this child special then, because she doesn't look nutritionally deficiant or unwell?

Do you think she is just falls randomly outside of the "norm" simply due to the nature of statistics in that some people always will be at either end of the spectrum or do you think perhaps she has an emotional need that is not being fulfilled yet by the world around her? Or do you think that most children would still need the emotional connection at that age if we didn't intervene and wean them earlier to suit ourselves?

[LeeJ]

wow marie, are you that rude to everyone?

really, wow.

i just wrote out some of my reply, but realise, it is irrelivant.

you say people look down on you for breastfeeding,
well you are lowering to the same level by tut tutting the FF's....

[beebs]

Thanks for answering me!:goodvibes: I was afraid I was bout to get yelled at for being too stoopid!:o

So what do you think makes this child special then, because she doesn't look nutritionally deficiant or unwell?

Do you think she is just falls randomly outside of the "norm" simply due to the nature of statistics in that some people always will be at either end of the spectrum or do you think perhaps she has an emotional need that is not being fulfilled yet by the world around her? Or do you think that most children would still need the emotional connection at that age if we didn't intervene and wean them earlier to suit ourselves?

Good questions:yes:

[Mrs Nietzsche]

I think it would probably be behavioural?

My kids have both stopped feeding as much as they do more indepedent stuff during the day, they are busy with other things etc.

I assume this stuff is built into us. The sucking reflex = comfort is so so so dominant when we are born, it probably just fades away as we develop and the brain gets filled with other stuff.

It's impossible to really know what's going on with an 8 year old, we just don't have enough info .. it could just be that she's on the outer edge of a natural bell curve of natural weaning, or it could be something else entirely.

[Looshkin]

Thanks for answering me!:goodvibes: I was afraid I was bout to get yelled at for being too stoopid!:o

So what do you think makes this child special then, because she doesn't look nutritionally deficiant or unwell?



No she doesn't look unwell I agree.:yes:
Maybe her mum just thinks breasmilk is the better choice over weaning to dairy breastmilk, to get the whole dairy 4 times a day or whatever it is you know?
*shrug*
maybe they don't see it as physical or sexual and see it as food.. like we don't see getting milk as molesting cows..?

[Mathermy]

I think it would probably be behavioural?

My kids have both stopped feeding as much as they do more indepedent stuff during the day, they are busy with other things etc.

I assume this stuff is built into us. The sucking reflex = comfort is so so so dominant when we are born, it probably just fades away as we develop and the brain gets filled with other stuff.

It's impossible to really know what's going on with an 8 year old, we just don't have enough info .. it could just be that she's on the outer edge of a natural bell curve of natural weaning, or it could be something else entirely.

It's so interesting! I wonder if she is home schooled? I imagine if she were this could be a factor because it would work for convenience sake and the child would unlikely be as influenced by her peers and possibly more dependent on the reationship with her mother.:detective:

[Mathermy]

No she doesn't look unwell I agree.:yes:
Maybe her mum just thinks breasmilk is the better choice over weaning to dairy breastmilk, to get the whole dairy 4 times a day or whatever it is you know?
*shrug*
maybe they don't see it as physical or sexual and see it as food.. like we don't see getting milk as molesting cows..?
:detective: thats interesting too, I wonder if the whole family drink it? How amazing would it be to never have to buy milk! But then she probably wouldn't make enough milk though...or would she if she had the "demand"?

[Lily_Pad]

Completely off topic, but has anyone ever heard of cancer patients drinking breastmilk? I remember seeing something about it on tv, a man with cancer was drinking a certain amount of his daughters' breastmilk a day hoping it would help him. But it never said if it actually works?

[Mrs Nietzsche]

Yeah... it is prescribed in the US at some cancer clinics.

Apparently it can inihibit cancer cells in petri dishes etc.

There is a man in the US who swears by it curing his prostate cancer.

I have a load of links someone sent me on it from the ABA coz my Dad has prostate canceer but I didn't get around to reading them through.

[~Temet Nosce~]

Why drink cows milk then and why is it ok many ask?
Because we wouldn't exactly be able to mass produce breastmilk now would we, we can't just line em up and milk em- and even if we could, I think that milk would be better off going to prem babies, hospitals etc.

Anyway.. this thread is seriously making me dizzy from the circles its doing :dizzy:

[Mathermy]

Completely off topic, but has anyone ever heard of cancer patients drinking breastmilk? I remember seeing something about it on tv, a man with cancer was drinking a certain amount of his daughters' breastmilk a day hoping it would help him. But it never said if it actually works?

I think I remember Phyllis mentioning this :yes:, yanno it is probably like superfood that we should all be drinking! Joke is probably on us who do not partake, might be the fountain of youth :goodvibes:

[biscotti]

Completely off topic, but has anyone ever heard of cancer patients drinking breastmilk?

:yes::yes::yes::yes:

This child is known to me, it's just a fabulous story click here (http://www.thedaily.com.au/news/2009/jan/13/breast-milk-cancer-fight/)

[Mathermy]

Why drink cows milk then and why is it ok many ask?
Because we wouldn't exactly be able to mass produce breastmilk now would we, we can't just line em up and milk em- and even if we could, I think that milk would be better off going to prem babies, hospitals etc.

Anyway.. this thread is seriously making me dizzy from the circles its doing :dizzy:

Well we certainly have a lot of women, and the vast majority of them end up having babies at one point or another...and if we were not under so much intense pressure to wean perhaps many would lactate for far longer :detective:

But I agree, we best not "line em up and milk em" but I'm sure a mother might be able to produce enough for her own brood :detective:

[Pax]

Fascinating!

Breast milk used in cancer fight

12:00a.m. 13th January 2009
| By Kathy Sundstrom (http://www.thedaily.com.au/staff/kathy-sundstrom/contact/)

A Sunshine Coast mother believes the breast milk she has fed her gravely ill nine-year-old daughter since October has contributed toward substantial improvement in the youngster’s health.
The girl was given a bleak prognosis by doctors in October when they found she had a life-threatening tumour.
The mother’s close friend, a Sunshine Coast midwife, suggested that they try breast milk as a treatment option. She said she had recently finished studying its unique health benefits.
“Six months before the child was diagnosed, I was doing research as part of my midwifery and read that breast milk contains a protein that causes cell death in malignant tumours,” the midwife said.
“I thought I would like to research this as an innovative treatment and when the child was diagnosed, I suggested they try it. There was nothing to lose and plenty to gain.”
The midwife went to an Australian Breastfeeding Association meeting in Maroochydore and asked mothers if they would be prepared to donate their milk to help.
She also advertised for breast milk in the Sunshine Coast Daily classifieds.
The child was given 500ml of breast milk each day mixed with fruit in a “smoothie”.
“Since those first weeks, donations have grown through word of mouth,” she said.
“There are so many generous wonderful breastfeeding mothers on the Coast who will do anything to help.
“We are extremely grateful to all those mothers who have donated their ‘magic milk’ as we are certain that it has been of substantial benefit.”
An examination of the child in Brisbane on Friday showed that there had been a significant turnaround in the girl’s condition.
She is now looking at going back to school.
The breast milk was used with other alternative and traditional treatments.
The girl would require ongoing check-ups, but “the doctor was very happy with her results”.
The Australian Breastfeeding Association’s Lactation Resource Centre manager Kate Mortensen said no research had been undertaken in Australia on the medical benefits of breast milk.
It was however a documented fact that breast-fed babies were less likely to obtain a certain form of leukaemia and incidences of breast cancer were less in mothers who had breast fed.
“There have been anecdotal reports (of treating cancer with breast milk), but no formal research has been undertaken,” Ms Mortensen said.
“In the laboratory it has been found something in breast milk knocks off cancer cells. In America, they have donor milk banks and you can get it on prescription. There could be great potential for research.”
The midwife encouraged anyone trying breast milk as a medical treatment to document their results. She can be contacted through the Daily.
Last night, the little girl’s father thanked the midwife and the mothers who had given his family help and support.


http://www.thedaily.com.au/news/2009/jan/13/breast-milk-cancer-fight/

[Lily_Pad]

Yeah... it is prescribed in the US at some cancer clinics.

Apparently it can inihibit cancer cells in petri dishes etc.

There is a man in the US who swears by it curing his prostate cancer.

I have a load of links someone sent me on it from the ABA coz my Dad has prostate canceer but I didn't get around to reading them through.

Wow. Amazing stuff.

Malol - might just be! Maybe breastmilk is what I need to finally get rid of this cold that's been lingering for weeks haha

[bubbasmum]

GROSS! GROSS! GROSS!
I don't care what anyone says, what evidence they have to back up why its so great:ecomcity:. I think its wrong and those kids sound a little weird to me anyway.
You asked me what I think - I'm telling you.:D

[Lily_Pad]

Thanks guys, it's fascinating isn't it.
The reason I'm so interested is because when DD was first born she got really sick. At 3 weeks old she had a stroke and at 6 weeks old she got meningitis. I breastfed her for all those months in hospital which was very hard. But all the drs always used to say was how well she looked for a baby with meningitis. It really was amazing. They were telling me that she should be completely out of it, always sleeping, floppy, pale, not feeding. The only symptoms she had were irritability, headache and fever. I've always wondered if breastfeeding her helped out in that sense and was the part of the reason why she recovered so quickly.

Sorry for hijacking the thread! Just something I was wondering.

[TacoFest]

Ok well here is how I see it. I matured very early and got my period when I was 9. So at 9 years old I was a woman, had been through puberty and could fall pregnant technically. If this woman continued to breast feed her child for a couple more years, at what point does the girl stop being a child and become an adult? Is it ok for a mature (gone through puberty) child to still be breastfed???

I have nothing against breast feeding at all. My daughter is 3 days old and at this stage fully formula fed. I would love to breastfeed and hope I can at some point.

However I don't think breastfeeding til 8 years old is in the best interest of the child.

[Poppetfish]

I have read this whole thread.

I remember watching this documentary on tv. Apparently they are homeschooled children and they are fruitarians (sp?)

I personally think it is wrong as the mother is keeping her children in a buble so that she can breastfeed them. I don't think it is wrong in the breastfeeding is best sense but the whole "Lets get the kids to talk about and love my boobies more then anything else so that i feel needed" is.

I personally believe breastmilk is best but like beebs, i cant breastfeed. When i was pregnant with DS i planned to breastfeed. I went to all the classes and learnt all the techniques. At hospital i went to the breastfeeding clinic so i could find out if i was doing it right everything. My DS kept loosing weight. I can't produce breastmilk. I took all the drugs and i was so sick off of them and i still tried. At the height of my expressing, i was managing 20mls a day. When i finally got up enough nerve to go out in public i was insulted. A woman came up up to me and said that i was killing my baby and i was ill-informed and if i had a brain in my head i would be breastfeeding. I went home crying. I now openly tell people about what has happened to try to enlighten people that say that everyone can breastfeed, some just choose not to.

I Think that if i saw an 8yr old being breastfed in public i would be just as disgusted as seeing an 8yr old sucking down a bottle. Something that is done for comfort before bed or when stressed is one thing but doing it out in public and not caring about the negitive comments that might be aimed at your child is another, far more selfish thing to do.

That is my opinion anyway.


EDIT: Also DS and DD have severe allergies including anaphalaxis and my DS has Autism. I don't think that they are caused because of FF and anyone that does has their head in the sand.

[beebs]

Breastmilk is best no doubt, its normal and natural. But I too don't think that this is at all about breastfeeding, it seems to me that the mother either can't let go of her 'baby' or a co-dependency issue or something. Not that I am judging - each to their own - I just feel it is more than what it seems - there is more at play here than just breastfeeding.

[kezzaskids]

I can honestly say I dont know what to think! I dont think it is the wrong thing to do but I dont know If I would want to..... I have enjoyed reading the thread though....

[beebs]

EDIT: Also DS and DD have severe allergies including anaphalaxis and my DS has Autism. I don't think that they are caused because of FF and anyone that does has their head in the sand.

I have allergies, chronic asthma and I get 2-3 middle ear infections a year - I catch every cold/flu going around, I was diagnosed with Osteo athiritis at 28 years old, i have vasospasm and now have to be tested for auto immune diseases after I have the twins and I was breastfed:)

[~Temet Nosce~]

:( that sucks beebs.
I'm lucky my dd was blessed with my good immunity, regardless of being fed formula. She's never had anything worse than a bad cold, ever, no ear or chest infections, only time she needed antibiotics was when she had conjunctivitis at 9 days old (wish I had of been able to get some of the milk I still had out then, stupid inverted nipples), and she turns 2 on monday. Sure she will probably get something eventually but shes done pretty well so far! I was formula fed too.

Aaaanyway I sense this may be derailing again :laughing:

[Lemonhead]

Breastfeeding is best for BABIES....

Babies. Over 1-2 years old IMO is just unnecessary.

Give the kid some damn juice.

[4OnEarth1InHeaven]

I just wanted to drop by and say i saw this a while ago and did not like watching it.

But peoples choices are thier own, i just beleive that at this age or at the age when milk is no longer a "food" that it should be kept at home. i beleive this goes for breast and bottle. just my opinion.

and marie i think it is, some people just find bf purely uncomfortable and do not like it, so why should they be forced to be down and depressed purely because breast is better? is a depressed mother better than a bf baby?
i have bf all my children even expressed measly amounts when my second son was born premmie i did this for four weeks, so i am not talking about myself, but i have a very close friend who cannot imagine bf she did not even try with her daughter.

i guess my thoughts are everyone is entitled to their own choice an no one person should get judged.

[reAllytee]

Yep give the child juice ... :rolleyes:

Ok I am so going to log off before I just say something so freaking nasty.

[TacoFest]

Breastfeeding is best for BABIES....

Babies. Over 1-2 years old IMO is just unnecessary.

Give the kid some damn juice.

I just spit my drink everywhere at "give the kid some damn juice" I agree with you though. 8 is just wayyyyy to old. A lot of girls are going through puberty at this age. At what age does a person stop being a child and become an adult??

I formula feed my daughter and she is 3 days old and I am sure she will turn out just as clever and healthy as those children who are breastfed.

[Lemonhead]

Yep give the child juice ... :rolleyes:

Ok I am so going to log off before I just say something so freaking nasty.

What? Is orange juice really unreasonable for an 8 year old? I have a 10 year old sister and I would be so so disturbed if my mother was still BFing her. Its wrong, we dont live in a third world country where food is hard to come by....at this age I dont think it is justifiable. Just my opinion.

[workin'mumof2]

:confused:JUICE! WTF

juice is no where near close to the nutritional value of breast milk and the comparison is laughable :laughing::laughing::laughing::laughing:

[Sunnygal]

Breastfeeding is best for BABIES....

and toddlers :yes: upto and beyond 2 :D

[Mathermy]

and toddlers :yes: upto and beyond 2 :D

and possibly Malols :p

ewwww how dirty and gross and disgusting am I? ew ew eeeeewwww.:laughing:

[Lemonhead]

:confused:JUICE! WTF

juice is no where near close to the nutritional value of breast milk and the comparison is laughable :laughing::laughing:

For an 8 year old...we arent talking about a baby or even a toddler...this is a CHILD and as previously mentioned bordering on puberty!


and toddlers :yes: upto and beyond 2 :D

I did say that :)

Is it ok to BF your 16 year old then? When is it NOT ok?

[Sunnygal]

and possibly Malols :p


Yes and the Malols - seriously Im going into business just for you :D breastmilk smoothies, breastmilk vitamins, and breastmilk moisturisers!

[Sunnygal]

Breastfeeding is best for BABIES....

Babies. Over 1-2 years old IMO is just unnecessary.


Not having a dig hun :o Just wanted to clarify :yes:


Is it ok to BF your 16 year old then? When is it NOT ok?

No idea!! I spose when either party decides to stop?!

[TacoFest]

:confused:JUICE! WTF

juice is no where near close to the nutritional value of breast milk and the comparison is laughable :laughing::laughing::laughing::laughing:

yes of course breast milk has more nutrional value that juice. butttt we are talking about a child here. She would get nutrients from all the normal food she eats! Breast feeding is not beneficial to a child of that age. They get their nutrients from food!!!! The breastfeeding of an 8 yr old is only for comfort! and its wrong imo.

So sure breast milk is more nutritional for a baby or toddler but an 8 year old should not be breastfed!!!!

[Phyllis Stein]

So I think maybe breast milk could still be healthy and useful... you could almost say essential, in that we supplement it with another species breastmilk and market it as essential to development?

Also that cancer thing,People drinking (human) breast milk..which makes sense now that Phyllis informed us of the stem cells ..you know?
So in that sense, if growing children still need supplements from dairy- or let's be honest - another species breastmilk - why not human?
I know the formula adds I've seen say - oh they still need this for immune system until at least 3.. so formula is normalised





I wonder if the little girl at 8 is still benefiting from the breast milk as a younger child would nutritionally?

I figure (and NO im not saying that its wrong, etc, its just an opinion)- that at 8 the child *should* be getting the nutrients she needs from food, etc, and therefore the NEED for breast milk should be lessened?

For fear of putting my foot in my mouth, im going to stop here. Im just wondering about the nutritional value for the little girl. Would breast milk continue to be very nutritious?


Breastmilk is totally unique, a super food if you will. Most people in the west don't get nearly enough of it for optimal development, so it's quite ironic how many are close minded to drinking it after babyhood.

I think we simply set the bar for health so low that we don't recognise ill health until it's chronic disease. It's not just about the vitamins and minerals in breastmilk - it's the good bacteria that colonises the gut and directly and indirectly affect the immune system and even brain chemicals, it's the fatty acids that allow proper myelinisation of nerves, contributing to cognitive development and perhaps protecting against Alzheimer's, it's the stem cells that provide the body 'instructions' for optimal development and overcoming disease. And that's only the beginning.

Honestly, the more breastmilk you can get into a child, the better. I would happily feed a teen or adult breastmilk in a cup, only our culture would frown on it for no reason except conditioning and prejudice.


I have allergies, chronic asthma and I get 2-3 middle ear infections a year - I catch every cold/flu going around, I was diagnosed with Osteo athiritis at 28 years old, i have vasospasm and now have to be tested for auto immune diseases after I have the twins and I was breastfed:)

And I have diabetes type 2 with no risk factors, and I wasn't breastfed. Anecdotes fail to show a pattern that would indicate cause and effect. I'm very sorry you suffer all those illnesses, though.

[Lemonhead]

Not having a dig :o Just wanted to clarify :yes:

No probs!
I always ad a little IMO at the end so nobody can get too annoyed hehe

IMO... lol

[workin'mumof2]

The breastfeeding of an 8 yr old is only for comfort! and its wrong imo.
so do you confort your child. at all. god forbid you should.

HOW is this form of comforting wrong:hair:

[PeppaH]

No idea!! I spose when either party decides to stop?!

No one seemed to have wanted to answer me for this when I asked before, but WHAT IF the child doesnt want to stop and the mother wants the child to self wean? Would it be ok (in the eyes of the people here that have said this is ok at 8) foran older kid to breast feed? I would like to know if those people would still find it ok to see a 20 year old sucking on their mums boob.

[Mrs Nietzsche]

lol. It is okay to comfort an 8 year old with a playstation or a big mac, not with a breast, apparently.

[~Temet Nosce~]

I'd prefer a cuddle, personally, over a boob or big mac ;)

[Mrs Nietzsche]

Peppah, you may perhaps have not seen the analogy, but I said that considering no other mammal in the world continues to breastfeed into adulthood, we can extrapolate that humans probably wouldn't either.

I think you can stop worrying.

[Sunnygal]

No one seemed to have wanted to answer me for this when I asked before, but WHAT IF the child doesnt want to stop and the mother wants the child to self wean? Would it be ok (in the eyes of the people here that have said this is ok at 8) foran older kid to breast feed?


I reckon it would be different according to different opinions, so what one person might think is a 'wrong age' another might not! I mean on this forum alone, some say its wrong over a year, others say its wrong over five IYKWIM - I could only tell you at what age I think it would be wrong - and honestly Im not sure - Ill have to think about it and get back to you :yes:

[TacoFest]

so do you confort your child. at all. god forbid you should.

HOW is this form of comforting wrong:hair:

8 year olds can be comforted in many ways. Give them a cuddle! Its not the comforting that is wrong, its the breastfeeding part. A child of near puberty should not be comforted by breastfeeding! I ask then, at what age in your opinion is it wrong???

My child is 3 days old. Of course I comfort her. I cuddle her, kiss her and she looooves her bottle, so shoot me!

When she is 8 however, I will not be comforting her by breastfeeding her. IMO it's wrong.

[workin'mumof2]

As far as i know once the childs jaw changes shape. when they get more teeth 6,7or8years of age that is becomes incredibly hard to suckly anymore at the breast to get milk. so then they would wean. i read that from a post in another thread.

[PeppaH]

Peppah, you may perhaps have not seen the analogy, but I said that considering no other mammal in the world continues to breastfeed into adulthood, we can extrapolate that humans probably wouldn't either.

I think you can stop worrying.

Yeah but like you (I think) have said, we are the only animals that drink another speicies milk. So I guess that makes us different from other animals. Obviously if an 8 year old wants to drink from the boob, whats stopping her from wanting it when she is a teen? She seems pretty happy doing it now.

[TacoFest]

lol. It is okay to comfort an 8 year old with a playstation or a big mac, not with a breast, apparently.

What if it was an 8 year old boy? You would have no issues breastfeeding your 8 year old son in public? What if it was a 14 year old girl who has already gone through puberty? Would you still breastfeed then?

[TacoFest]

I'd prefer a cuddle, personally, over a boob or big mac ;)

me too :D:D

[misskittyfantastico]

A few years back, I would have had a toe firmly dipped in the digusting camp, but now, after having my mind opened and educated by some spectacular women, plus breastfeeding my second child past the socially acceptable, magic, 12 month mark, my thoughts have changed. I say to those who think women BF fullterm because they "love" it? PFFTTT! PFFTTT! It's hard and painful and invasive, but it's also the BEST, most normal way to comfort a child. It's a committment (one that if you have never breastfed, you cannot comprehend) it's a sacrifice, it's a joy.

[beebs]

And I have diabetes type 2 with no risk factors, and I wasn't breastfed. Anecdotes fail to show a pattern that would indicate cause and effect. I'm very sorry you suffer all those illnesses, though.

Yeah - i know:)

[CrankyAndTired]

Childhood development is multifactorial. To really evaluate the benefits or drawbacks to a situation you have to look at the entire context; physical, mental, social, emotional, cultural.

As has been well established, there is no physical need for an 8 year old child to be breastfeed, as they can get their nutritional needs met in other ways.

There is no proof of any intellectual benefit from breastfeeding at 8 years of age, and in fact the social and cultural stigma associated with an 8 year old feeding from her mother's breast could easily lead to being outcast and finding it very difficult to assimilate with peers of her own age group.

Being ostracised from her peer group could have serious implications for her emotional and social development.

From early to middle childhood many things change, children no longer require their mother to provide their feeding, as children grow up they feed themselves, part of their growing independance.

Children need to find other ways of having closeness to their parents and to others, beyond suckling from their mother's breast. I think anyone looking at this situation holistically would have to admit that there are many potential problems for the little girl, socially and emotionally.

Not to mention, sexually. Girls can experience early onset puberty. How is a girl who is starting to learn of her own sexuality, how her body feels etc when she is still suckling from her mother's breast.

Is she finds sexual pleasure from touching herself - perfectly normal - how could it not confuse her to feed from her mother's breast at the same time. I do think there is potential for sexual dysfunction as a result of such an extended breastfeeding relationship.

I feel for this little girl. The effects of this unusual mother-daughter relationship could have devestating consequences for her later in life, in many ways.

[Mrs Nietzsche]

I don't know why you are asking me lululeah, I have never breastfed an 8 year old.

I actually think that the 8 year old in question is probably very insulated and that it would be very unusual for a child to want to keep feeding past 5 or so... but who can say.

I don't really think one breastfeeding 8 year old in the world is a big problem compared to the dismal rates of breastfeeding infants, or the plague of obesity in children, or any other number of concerns.

[TacoFest]

I agree with everything you said. Very well written:yelclap:

[misskittyfantastico]

What if it was an 8 year old boy? You would have no issues breastfeeding your 8 year old son in public?

I sure would! I get enough comments and "looks" feeding my 16 month old son! You appear to believe that women who breastfeed are doing it for their own enjoyment, as an entertaining hobby, as a perversion.