View Full Version : Share your labour and birth secrets!
I'm a first time mum and we all know that nobody can tell us exactly what labour and birth is like. However I did learn a lot while in labour and thought I might share a couple of things, maybe making it easier for others. My labour took 5-6 hours, and even though it was hard work, it was better than expected.
1. Throughout my pregnancy I was very calm, people used to comment on how calm I was. I was scared of what was to come, but I knew there was no point in being uptight. I tried to bring this into my labour and birth.
2. As soon as my contractions were 5 mins apart I remember one getting to me so badly that I cried out in pain which in turn made the contraction more painful! I realised that of course our natural instinct is to fight against the contraction, the pain, but it only makes the pain worse! So I thought I would go with the contraction instead. When a contraction would come on I would visualise what my body was trying to do and with all my might I tried to overcome the pain with deep breaths and watch the contraction come, do it's job and help it do it's job, then visualise it leaving.4 hours later I was in the hospital admissions room and I was fully dialated (made it just in time). At that point, contractions were on top of each other and I was just experiencing constant pain. I realised I must go with the contraction, that's what my body is doing and I have to stop fighting it! Next contraction I visualise my body opening up and baby moving down and just as I did that my body automatically pushed! I was not expecting it at all! It was on, an hour later my son was born.
This might seem like the obvious thing to do I don't know but it certainly helped me. I believe these were the reasons my labour and birth was quicker and better than I thought.
If you have any birthing secrets and it can be anything, please share. It might not work for everone. It might seem obvious, but it probably wont be obvious to others. I believe it can make mothers to be a lot calmer which is one of my secrets.
:thumbsup:
ButterflyMama
02-07-2009, 20:01
Labour in the water. Birth in the water if possible. Water is such an amazing tool for soothing pain and allowing you to relax into your body's rhythm.
Another tip
Keep active! Walk, rock those hips.
Keep your voice low and grunt/moan instead of scream. It takes less energy and can actually help keep you focused.
Surrender surrender surrender. Give in to your body's power and rhythm. Don't try and fight the pain or intensity, just go with it.
HTH :)
1. Have a fantastic support person with you who will put up with any possible rantings and ravings etc :laughing:.
2. As pp mentioned, try to keep as fit as possible throught your pregnancy and eat as healthily as possible.
3. Don't stress or worry about being naked/exposed in front of doctors/nurses/midwives etc. They really have seen it all before. :D
Find the right care provider for you. Don't put up with someone because you think it's too late to change. Ask the hard questions at the very beginning and find the care provider that has the same thinking as you....without it you're fighting an uphill battle before you even get started.
crazymuma
02-07-2009, 21:08
Remember to breathe - sounds stupid but it makes it ten times worse if you hold your breathe.
Concentrate completly on every breath in and out. My midwife told me to imagine the baby coming further down and closer to being born with every breath out - strangly it worked.
Another stupid one (that alot of women don't know with the first) when they say stop pushing as hard as it is stop and pant like crazy - I didn't with my first and ended up tearing - with my second I did and no tear :smiliedance:
I agree with move as much as possible - don't stop moving until the pain gets that bad that you have no choice.
Melbaby07
03-07-2009, 18:34
I like these :)
- Don't go to the hospital too early.
The feeling of rocking up to the hospital and finding out I was already 8 cm was absolute pure joy! If you can smile, it's too early ;)
- Read "Natural Birth: The Bradley Method" by Sarah McCutcheon ...
even if you plan a hospital birth with drugs (actually, especially if you plan a hospy birth with drugs). Bradley births are 'partner assisted births'. It will help you time contractions, explain best birthing positions (even with a drip line in your hand) and how to avoid forceps etc. It will also help you (and your DH) understand what stage of labour you're in - and why the nurse is telling you its too late for an epi! Everyone should own this book, lol
-Don't be afraid (or too embarrassed) to be messy.
Birth is messy. Have your DH watch a birth online so he doesn't freak when he sees what birth really looks like.
- After you've given birth to your beautiful baby you'll probably be in shock.
Talk with your DH/partner about what you want to do after you've given birth. You'll probably need someone to support you after the birth - as you shower, dress etc. Everyone will probably be looking after your new bub, so don't be afraid to ask for someone to help you out a little too :)
Have a waterbirth - best advice I can give.
Another great tip I was given during early transition when the pain went up a notch was to focus on a point across the room and when trying to focus on your breathing - imagine you have a long straw in your mouth and you are breathing out that straw and breathing all the pain away with each breath to that point. it sounds stupid but it really, really helped me at that stage when was like "I can't do this anymore!!!!:crying:"
Great tips girls thanks!!! :thumbsup:
Believe in your body. Read lots of positive birthing stories, and trust that your body, just like every other woman's, was designed to birth babies. That your body, will make a baby that should be the perfect size for you to cope with.
A must is having people with you that you trust, and who believe in you and have the same philosophy as you do about birth.
On the actual birthing side, i found that with my 3rd birth, the birthing bath was fantastic. Water really is so calming, be it water birth, or shower or whatever you have.
I also found it great to visualise my cervix's opening with each contraction. I was blowing out, and visualising in my head that i was blowing out the rim of my cervix, assisting it to dilate. It looked to me more like just a ring that i was blowing open in my mind. I think it really helped.
miasmumma
13-07-2009, 11:05
I agree with all of the above advice. What helped me through my 3 1/4 hr natural labour (from 5cm onwards) was:
* keeping the lights off or low as lighting can inhibite the release of oxcitosin (spl).
*walking around the maternity ward until i physically couldn't anymore (with drip in arm).
*focusing on breathing over anything else. i found the gas helped with this but i know for others it makes them sick (i put my scuba diving experience down to my ability to use the mask:))
*using pillows to prop me up onto all fours to help me to dilate further (i went from 4cm-10cm in 45mins).
*and above all as previously said, remebering that birth is natural and exciting and theres no reason why it shouldnt be any of those things:D.
Go in with an open mind. Anything can happen!
Trust your body and your instincts.
Don' be afraid to ask for anything. You are not going to 'bother' anyone, that's their job.
( I am always to scared to ask for anything because I don't want to be a pain)
ooo, I forgot another good one:
WHen you're at that point where you say/think "Oh my god, get the f*****g thing out! I don't care about a natural birth, give me all the drugs!!!"
...when you're at THAT point, the baby's just about to come out! :thumbsup:
mummabec
17-07-2009, 20:51
thanks for all your tips ladies it great as im just about 39 weeks and starting to wonder about all this
sweetseven
17-07-2009, 21:52
Music is very effective pain relief. Find some music you are comfortable with and have it played to help you cope with the contractions.
peanutbutter&jelly
17-07-2009, 21:55
I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who has put forth their ideas :)
I'm actually really looking forward to second bubby's birth in December - my first natural, thanks to a breech 1st bub who definately wasn't moving (he was last head down at 26 weeks or something ridiculously early), so a VBAC is in store for me... in roughly 21 - 23 weeks :D
beachmummy
21-07-2009, 13:10
These worked for me:
1. Go against your natural instinct to tense up with the pain and just completely relax, let go and breathe very slowly and deeply through each contraction.
2. Google the fear-tension-pain (**** Grantley Read) syndrome to understand why number one is so important
3. watch lots of calm births or hypnobirths on you tube!
4. Definitely birth in water if you can
Excitednewbie
22-07-2009, 13:15
What a great thread!! I'm 33wks 4dys and have just started to really read up on ways to help labour. Advise from real people is invaluable especially as everyone so far has had similar tips along the same lines as what I have been looking for.
I hope to add to this thread in about 7 weeks time with my own personal advice but will keep reading until then!!!
ooo, I forgot another good one:
WHen you're at that point where you say/think "Oh my god, get the f*****g thing out! I don't care about a natural birth, give me all the drugs!!!"
...when you're at THAT point, the baby's just about to come out! :thumbsup:
:laughing: SO true!
miasmumma
20-08-2009, 09:00
As ive said in previous posts the best massage during labour other than water (esp if the contractions are being felt in your back) comes from a tennis ball being rolled firmly over you. :yes:
oh and music literally drove me nuts in transitional stage so make sure someone is aware to turn it off if you start complaining of noises they cant hear (like a lionel richie song turned down ridiculously low but to me it sounded like the base was pounding next to my ear!)
and as previously said walk walk walk until you physically cant anymore and enlist a support person to practically make you.
remember if you scream for an epi and they say 'to late', dont freak out cause bubs is on its way...keep rocking.
all fours!!! helps to dilate, turn prostrior bubs and takes pressure off back labour if propped up well.
an active labour is generally a quickish one so move around and around and around.
if you wanna eat, then eat. if someone tells you you will spew it up who cares, take care of each need as it arises and worry about vomiting if it happen, which it wont necessarily.
headoverfeet
20-08-2009, 10:20
:confused: stay home?
okay yeah :laughing: honestly everyone has given some really good tips ^^ I just wanted to add...
Delay cord clamping http://www.gentlebirth.org/archives/cordIssues.html#Delayed
troubled
20-08-2009, 19:48
ooo, I forgot another good one:
WHen you're at that point where you say/think "Oh my god, get the f*****g thing out! I don't care about a natural birth, give me all the drugs!!!"
...when you're at THAT point, the baby's just about to come out! :thumbsup:
wow... thats EXACTLY what i said with my first 2... well actually i screamed it.. but yer
MagicalLeopluradon
20-08-2009, 21:10
Hahahaha yes very true! I went through my active labour drug free and at the very end I was like give me a f*****g epidural!!!!!!! I was too far dialated anyway so I didnt have one :laughing:
Things that worked for me:
The birth ball in the shower :thumbsup: I spent quite a few hours sitting on the birth ball with water pouring down on me....worked heaps!
Also staying active....really helps!
ooo, I forgot another good one:
WHen you're at that point where you say/think "Oh my god, get the f*****g thing out! I don't care about a natural birth, give me all the drugs!!!"
...when you're at THAT point, the baby's just about to come out! :thumbsup:
Mmmmm - the only thing I can think of is that when you feel like you are about to do a poo the size of a watermelon it actually means you are getting the urge to push. Somehow I missed that piece of info in all my research & I had no idea that I was ready.
If youe overdue, have a day where you just rest and relax (often it will send you into labour:laughing:).
My Biggest tip is to relax and allow your body to it's job.
Mmmmm - the only thing I can think of is that when you feel like you are about to do a poo the size of a watermelon it actually means you are getting the urge to push. Somehow I missed that piece of info in all my research & I had no idea that I was ready.
:laughing: I remember telling this group of girls, "You want to know what it feels like? It feels like you're pushing a massive poo" and they looked at me stunned... haha, love it!
firsttimeparents
01-09-2009, 18:09
My advice would be to stay at home as long as possible. I had a 51/2 hour labour and was at home for 41/2 hours of that lying in bed and breathing deeply and focusing on my breath through each contraction.
Also like the other ladies have said focus on your breathing and not tensing up and with each contraction I said out allowed baby down cervix open. Not sure if this worked but my waters broke at 4am was at the hospital at 4:45am fully dilated and pushing so something surely worked. There was no time for drugs.
I also found some useful ideas in the book called birthing skills by sarah murdoch and juju sundin.
kobi'smama
02-09-2009, 20:54
[QUOTE=miasmumma;4007029]
remember if you scream for an epi and they say 'to late', dont freak out cause bubs is on its way...keep rocking.
all fours!!! helps to dilate, turn prostrior bubs and takes pressure off back labour if propped up well.
QUOTE]
:iagree:
Also be prepared for your birth plan to go out the window - I was looking forward to my 'epidural induced, give me all the drugs you have birth' but got a 'went from 2cm-10cm dilated in 30mins too late for drug birth'
But it ended up being fantastic - esp to be able to be up and running straight after the birth.
As much as you stress about doing a poo on the table you cant stop it so dont worry! I think 90% of woman do - you dont even notice.
Dont worry about who is going to see your vagina - my MIL and Mum were in with DH and I when i birthed DS, i initially said they had to stay uphead end. When it came down to it i didnt want them anywhere near me so they were down the business end and described it as a flower blossoming...um no Its a vagina but hey child birth is a beautiful thing.
And lastly if you can ask to keep bub attached to the cord until it stops pulsating, makes sure they get all of the nutrients!
sandy_1902
03-09-2009, 11:31
ooo, I forgot another good one:
WHen you're at that point where you say/think "Oh my god, get the f*****g thing out! I don't care about a natural birth, give me all the drugs!!!"
...when you're at THAT point, the baby's just about to come out! :thumbsup:
so darn true
dont be shut of to everything
if they suggest breaking your waters.. most times it speeds things up and you birth sooner :D
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