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no one special
28-06-2009, 22:24
Long time member here but I would prefer to keep my anonymity. I would also like to share my story as it may help others to understand.

***

The day I found out I was pregnant was the worst day of my life. I had been in a relationship with my bf for a few months. I was late but I couldn't remember how late I was as I never remembered the date of my lmp. So I started at the test in horror and cried. I knew before I had even taken the test that should it be positive, I was 99.9% sure that I would have an abortion. The 0.01% would have been to allow for any radical change of mind that may occur, but it didn't.

I was angry, so very angry at myself for getting myself into this situation and you know what, you see we had been a bit lax about contraception. :rolleyes: More than 10 years later I am still angry at myself for this.

It's difficult to explain but in my head there was no concept of 'a baby growing inside me'. I had a growth, a medical condition that needed to be removed. That might sound really harsh but that's how I felt.

Let me make something very clear, there was absolutely no way I was going to have a baby. I had a myriad of reasons that primarily boiled down to, 'I wasn't ready'. I didn't know how 'easy' it would be to get an abortion. I didn't know that I would have thrown myself down stairs, gone to a backyard abortionist, found a coat hanger, drunk a bottle of gin, done ANYTHING to terminate the pregnancy. I was fully aware that it may mean that I would loose the ability to have children in the future and that was fine and I knew I wanted to have children in the future but just not now. I can't stress enough that I would have done 'what ever it took' to terminate the pregnancy.

As for adoption, not an option. I am not made of stone. I couldn't go through with a pregnancy only to give a baby to a complete stranger. I take my hat off to woman who can do this but I couldn't and no amount of support or counselling would have changed my mind about this.

I went to the doctors asap and advised then that I wanted an abortion. From memory over the next week I had to see a second doctor as well as a social worker and I think a sugeon (or at least the person who performs the procedure) so each could either make sure I was making the right decisiona and tell me about what was going to occur. I have to say they were all very supportive and non judgemental.

I was booked into the hospital and I remember filling out the forms. The form said "are you pregnant" and I didn't know how to answer it. Sure I was technically pregnant but I wasn't going to have a baby.

When I was wheeled into theatre I cried and cried and cried. I just wanted it to be over. The nurse hugged me and held my hand whilst I had the GA administered.

I woke up later, with the greatest feeling of relief I had ever felt. It was over.

I have never regretted that decision. I am angry at myself for getting myself into a position where I had to make that decision but never regretted the actual decision.

I don't wonder what if, because there never was.

I was 25 at the time.

That was my story :)

sunnyflower
28-06-2009, 22:46
:hugs:

Mummaholic
28-06-2009, 22:56
I hope it helps to share your story. :hugs:

beebs
29-06-2009, 10:05
:hugs: Thanks for sharing your story.

Lily_Pad
29-06-2009, 10:12
Thankyou for sharing :hugs:

MissWinter
15-01-2010, 01:12
Although I could never feel the way you did, I am so proud of you, and so glad that you made the right decision for you :) Nobody ever says congrats on a termination, but in your case, I think it is due, as you seem to have not one ounce of regret! :)

fox_girl
15-01-2010, 01:23
Thanks for sharing your story.

I couldn't post and not give you some of these.....


:hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:

ChangedMyMind
04-04-2011, 16:03
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

The strength you have not only to tell the story but to make such a definite decision is really inspiring.

I cried when I read that you cried, not for your loss, but for comfort for your frustration at the long drawn out process when really you just want it to be done and move on.

Thank you

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: