on becoming babywise

[mitchsmum]

hi

was wondering if anyone had read the book ' on becoming babywise' and if so had they used the programs?
I would really like to hear other peoples experiences.

[Tea Lady]

G'day Mitchsmum,

Although I haven't read the whole book, I have read significant parts of it and seen several of the videos and done my own research - my basic conclusion being that I'm not keen on the program for several reasons. The main ones are that it appears that the Ezzos (who wrote the program) are of questionable integrity and have been shown to be dishonest in several different situations, that they don't base their program on any good quality research (but instead make huge claims about what your child "should" or "shouldn't" do based on nothing in particular unless you count their own badly documented "research") and last but certainly not least I think their theology is REALLY sus.

As you can tell, I'm not a fan(!). Having said that though, the majority of kids whose parents use the program turn out fine, particularly when the parents are flexible with it - the main problem seems to be when the program is interpreted rigidly - leads to much stress for everyone concerned. Also, there are some good things about it - eg focussing on relationship between parents (ie not getting completely hung up on the baby) and the aim to have well behaved, not-self-centered kids.

I don't want to keep raving on here, because I really don't want to be inflammatory (I've got quite a few friends who use the program and I think they're great parents) but I would be happy to chat more if you want - just send me a private message. Also, if you want to know more about the negatives, there's a site that's called something like www.ezzoinfo.org (not 100 % sure of the address - google should help) which has articles written by pediatricians and more info about the history (and dishonesty I talked about before) of the Ezzos.

Happy parenting (whatever you choose!)

Lucy

[Tea Lady]

The website is www.ezzo.info. I'd really encourage anyone considering the program to have a look, just to weigh up their options.

[Milly]

I have heard about this book series and it does have quite a reputation for being too strict and the author has been surrounded in some controversy. He is not what he claims to be and apparently he is a fraud. There was a lot on this last year in the news and on US Parenting sites. Even the most routine parent I know (I know two who have read the books) have said that they have taken the advice in them with a grain of salt. Intersting for the odd tip, but not something that they would stick too.

For me personally, I would avoid these books. There are many other great parenting/baby books out there and you will find that you and your baby will develop your own pattern too. Read advice but be flexible and adapt it to your own baby. :)

[AM]

Run! Run in the other direction!
Babywise books are bad news.

Try reading some of Dr William Sears books, The Baby Book is a good starting point.

Angie

[Nan]

Hi girls!
I'm afraid I'd have to say "On the contrary" to these suggestions! No offence, but I believe that proof is very much in the pudding, so to speak. It doesn't matter to me about controversy and media hype. I'm into personal, relevant proof. Five good friends of mine have all passed on the book to each other and have used it! (I've just finished my copy.) Every single one of them have had their child sleeping through the night by 11 weeks! The babies all have different personalities so no one really says 'yes, but you have an easy baby'. One of my friends now has her daughter sleeping for 11-12 hours per night at 16 weeks.

I think the books are definitely worth looking at. They are not as strict as they have been made out to be. Sometimes I hear people say things that are supposed to have come out of them and I go 'Hang on, I never read that! Where did that come from?!!' So do check them out for yourselves and don't just go by what you hear.

Love,
Nan. xx

[mimi]

Run! Run in the other direction!
Babywise books are bad news.

Try reading some of Dr William Sears books, The Baby Book is a good starting point.
I would like to concur Angie!

and here is something I was reading about the Babywise book


An outcry from medical and child development experts persuaded Ezzo to revise his 1998 version of Babywise to say that babies should be fed when they're hungry. However, the book still instructs otherwise: It tells parents that if their baby doesn't eat at a scheduled feeding, he must wait until the next one. In fact, the book abounds with mixed messages. For example, in one part of the book it says, "Understand that some babies may need to feed more often, others less." Yet two pages later it says, "The point is this: It's okay to deviate from the two-and-a-half- to three-hour feeding norm. But do not deviate so often that you establish a new norm."...

Alarm bells went off when doctors began seeing more and more infants who were showing signs of failure to thrive, poor weight gain, and dehydration. When questioned about their feeding practices, many of the parents admitted they were following Ezzo's PDF program. And though they could see something was drastically wrong with their infants, the parents found it hard — sometimes impossible — to blame Parent Directed Feeding. After all, they were following the advice of a Christian pastor and a pediatrician. How could such experts be wrong?

Many members of the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) found a great deal wrong. In fact, in April 1998, a hundred doctors, lactation specialists, and childcare professionals sent a letter to the AAP contending that a number of Ezzo's statements were unsubstantiated and false. Although it didn't name Ezzo specifically, the AAP responded by issuing a Media Alert reaffirming its position that scheduled feedings may put babies at risk for poor weight gain and deydration. The statement advised parents that "newborns should be nursed whenever they show signs of hunger, such as increased alertness or activity, mouthing, or rooting. Crying is a late indicator of hunger. Newborns should be nursed approximately eight to 12 times every 24 hours until satiety."

Hope you find some better books mitchsmum!! as I am sure you will!

[channy]

I also have not heard much positive about this book. I had a friend who read it because it was recommended as being written by a Christian. Because her baby was different she felt like a bad mum and sufferred severe depression.

Nan - I do not see why having your baby sleep 12hrs is a thing to boast about. My son is 4mths and does not sleep that long. Think about it, we do not sleep and go without food or drinking for that long why should we expect a baby too. Especilly considering the size of their tummies. Sure you can train them to sleep that long but I think it is cruel and selfish.

Just my thoughts. As I have not read it I can't comment that it is completely wrong but do not agree with some things I have heard.

Chantell

[Nan]

Hi!
I didn't mean to sound as if I was boasting. Sorry! It's more about training children to learn that night is for sleep and day is for wake, as that is what they will be doing for the next decade or so.
Mimi, I do agree that the book does sometimes sound like it is contradicting itself, but it doesn't. You have to read those quotes in the context of the whole chapter, not just pick out bits. (as you would with any book)
Channy, I don't know if you can compare infant sleep with ours as they always need more than we do.
I suppose we all just have to do what what we believe is right for our baby. I think this is right for mine, but others may not and that is cool! I can respect that.
Hope everyone is traveling well.
Love,
Nan. xx

[mimi]

Hi Nan

You seem to like the book under scrutiny here!! Have you read a variety of books to get a feel for what information is available? I have read sooooo many books prior to, and since, my childrens' arrival - and I found it a long and arduous process to sift through what is out there! and more importantly, to work out what is based on real research, versus what is simply based on someone's personal idea.

Re Babywise again ...

Ezzo, who has no formal medical training, is executive director of the for-profit organization Growing Families International (GFI). With his wife, Anne Marie, Ezzo runs church-based classes for parents who wish to give their children a rigid religious upbringing. Although few readers know it, the Babywise books are the secular versions of Ezzo's original parenting program, which includes guides such as "Preparation for Parenting" and "Growing Kids God's Way" (GKGW). The content of these guides is based on GFI's own unpublished self-conducted studies. The studies have not been subjected to peer review, which means there has been no independent, professional evaluation of the studies or their findings, the usual method of verifying the worth of scientific studies.
We can now find oodles of books by [and programs offered by!!] so called 'sleep experts', promising how they will get your baby into a more convenient 'sleep through the night' routine [often at ridiculously early ages] to make life easier for you [the parent] .... when if fact, all they are doing, is trying to force unnatural routines upon babies, in less than caring ways, just to fullfil some incorrect, societal expectation of babies sleeping long and hard alone at night!! A true expert on sleep is someone who observes sleep in thousands - or maybe millions!- of babies to discover what is normal - like J J McKenna PhD, who has observed mothers and babies and their sleep habits for 25 years or more. See his information at
http://www.nd.edu/~jmckenn1/lab/index.html and
http://www.naturalchild.com/james_mckenna/

His words...

An infant sleeping for long periods in social isolation from parents constitutes an extremely recent cultural experiment, the biological and psychological consequences of which have never been evaluated. Most ... assume that solitary sleep is "normal," the healthiest and safest form of infant sleep. Psychologists as well as parents assume that this practice promotes infantile physiological and social autonomy. Recent studies challenge the validity of these assumptions and provide many reasons for postulating potential benefits to infants sleeping in close proximity to their parents – benefits which would not seem likely with solitary sleeping...
Given the human infant’s evolutionary past, where even brief separations from the parent could mean certain death, we might want to question why infants protest sleep isolation. They may be acting adaptively, rather than pathologically.
The words of another anthropologist, Dettwyler PhD, makes for interesting reading also! http://www.kathydettwyler.org/detsleepthrough.html
Dr Sears also has some good information at http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T070300.asp
Happy reading!
:)

[RED]

I read babywise and I did find some parts a bit 'strict' and couldn't follow it (the waking of the baby throughout the day is a bit tough)but I thought it was useful to have a guide for sleep & feed times as I loosely based my daughters day around these. I never woke her at 10pm but always woke her at 7am to start the days routine and still do. As with all these parenting books that are available we need to decide what works best for us and our babies.

[sasholi]

I just want to start out by saying that anyone who uses on becoming babywise and it works for them – great. Only you know what is best for your baby and what works for you and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

To this day I thought I did something wrong. Just like Channy’s friend, I think I have suffered some mild (undiagnosed) depression as a result of the book “On Becoming Babywise”. Even though I should have questioned the book more closely. I should have asked my intuition about what I read in the book, as much seemed to be counter-intuitive. I am an intelligent person and I currently study at uni. When we quote facts and statistics we must must must provide references but this book didn’t. Why didn’t I twig? Anyway. Here is my story (I’ll try to be brief).

A wonderful mother and friend of mine loaned the book to me. I decided to read and follow the book as I hadn’t read or thought about any books at that stage in my pregnancy (about ½ way through). She followed those books and she has the most beautiful, adorable little angel boy. She is also a wonderful, loving, patient and kind mother. I thought, well, I want the type of interaction she has with her child. Obviously it comes from following this book to the letter, which is exactly what I did.

I don’t know why I did this. I still feel a bit stupid and foolish as if my brain disappeared for a while and I shouldn’t feel bad about the book because it is my own stupid fault for not being a bit more intelligent about it all.

Anyway, I realised that by 10 weeks of age I still didn’t know my baby’s cries – when he was hungry, tired, bored, in pain etc. I stopped cuddling him to sleep at 2 weeks of age for fear he wouldn’t fall asleep independently, and I obsessed over his daytime sleeps and naps so much so that some days we both just ended up crying and frustrated all day (even if he was happy I would try and “force” my amazing little bundle to sleep). I felt totally emotionally unattached to my baby, even though I loved him so fiercly and with everything in me, I just couldn’t connect with this little creature. I would end up screaming into the pillow in another room out of sheer frustration and anger while my poor little bundle just wanted to get up and be happy and play with mummy. By 12 weeks he still wasn’t sleeping through and his day time naps were sketchy. Just let me reiterate. I followed the book *to the letter*. I jotted down his sleep times and everything (I still have them recorded in his aptly named “sleep book”). I became obsessed. Truly obsessed with his sleep. Pretty soon, I felt like he stopped looking to me for comfort as when he would get upset going to sleep, I could pick him up and he still wouldn’t calm down. I feel like he lost trust in me, and that is something I can’t forgive myself for (or the book).

I gave up on the book thinking I had somehow failed as a mother. I read and re-read the book wondering what on earth I had done wrong, scouring the pages for the bit I missed, the magic formula that would help me “mould” my baby into what the book promised. Was it because I didn’t let my baby cry himself to sleep (I still could not do that, even though the book highly advocates that)? Was it because I cuddled him to sleep once or twice?. Then I read the ezzo info site and realised that maybe it wasn’t me – it was the book.

I feel like that I let the book take away my instinct and my intuition. I almost felt like I had allowed it to “brainwash” me. Parts of the book remain in my mind, and I still obsess over day time sleep, no matter how hard I try to “relax”.

There is a positive end to this story.

At three months of age I decided to try and forget the advice in the book. Three weeks ago he fell asleep in my arms for the first time since he was a tiny baby. I felt totally validated as a mother again, and I cried and cried because that is what I had been missing so often. I didn’t feel guilty about it and I sometimes let him drift off in my arms even now and know that I am just developing a trust bond with my little creature.

Sorry for babbling on.

My advice is this: read whatever you can. But remember that these people have an agenda. In order to not breach copyright, the author must write something totally different to someone else’s ideas. Therefore, quite often, books will be one extreme version. Get ideas and guidelines. But remember that each baby is an individual. In my opinion you want to connect with your child and build trust before you establish independent sleep etc.

Take bits and pieces from books and don’t be scared to be critical of them. And do your research. What works for one parent and baby may not work for you and yours.

But I am still dealing with some echoes that I have from that book.

Sorry for going on and on!!!!

I just read that and realised I sound like a total nut. I am not as neurotic as it sounds!

[mimi]

I just read that and realised I sound like a total nut. I am not as neurotic as it sounds!
Of course you are NOT, Aleksander's mum!!!
You are a kind and loving mum- who has now realised the power of her own intuition! Too many, so called, 'experts' are taking that away from mothers these days ... but don't worry, it started way back with Dr Spock!! and just continues. As I have said before, it takes a loooong time and a lot of effort to sift through the mountains of baby care books - and to try and discover who is actually giving us valid information!

There are just too many 'baby experts' promising the 'more convenient'/'better behaved'/'routine loving' baby - giving definite sleep times/amounts/feed times etc :eek: [no wonder you became obsessive A'smum!!] BUT this must sound all so appealing to a new mum in the midst of the chaos that is REAL mothering!! I could not possibly condemn anyone who falls for this, but I do feel frustrated that it seems that almost anyone seems to be able to write baby care books and suddenly become an expert in the field!

Anyway, I won't continue to go on :rolleyes: I would just like to congratulate you, Aleksander's mum, on having the courage to trust your instincts and I hope you can happily continue following your heart - Aleksander will thank you for it;)

[ethanconnorsmum]

hi

was wondering if anyone had read the book ' on becoming babywise' and if so had they used the programs?
I would really like to hear other peoples experiences.


I started reading this book when my son was 2 weeks old. To me, a lot of it was common sense, which I put into practice & have benefited from greatly. An example of one benefit is that my son has been sleeping through the night since about 7 weeks old, & is still doing so at 12 weeks. I am just about to buy the Babywise Book Two which relates to 5 - 18 months. I didn't follow the program 100%, but what new mum could, when you are in that intense, survival mode time in your life! And I was careful to filter things which didn't really work for the lifestyle of my husband & myself. But overall, I put the principles into practice & found them to be successful. I have since read several other early parenting books & have found the variety to be great, as it gives different perspectives.

[hannahizzy]

I have also read and followed babywise, but i have been a little bit flexible with it and i think it has worked a treat!!!! i have now used with 2 of my 3 children and would be lost without it, as long as you are flexible it works wonders and reduced my stress levels greatly!! because i knew why they were crying all the time!!! cant rave about it anymore love it love it love it!!!!!:thumbsup:

[Mrs Little]

I have to agree with Nan, Ethanconnorsmum and hannahizzy.

I too have used the principles from 'Babywise'. I would highly reccommend this book to anyone. Just like ALL other parenting styles, each style is different and will require some changes or flexibility to match the parent's lifestyles or personaility. I don't think i've ever followed anything verbatem, and babywise isn't meant to be followed verbatem! We don't all have the same personalities or the same looks so why would we all parent the same? or follow a routine to the T!

Babywise has some great routine ideas...that are very much common sense! I agree with Ethanandconnorsmum. My mother read the book when i said that we were going to follow it when we had our bub. She gave it back to me and said
"Wow. it's exactly what i did with you 25 years ago....just in a book!".

I have shared my routines with many a mum on bubhub....and no one has said anything negative about it. But as soon as you say 'oh...i use babywise'...people start to think negatively.

My suggestion to mums is that if babywise suits you...then use it! The books says to make their routines and suggestions fit your family lifestyle...and even gives examples of two or three different families that follow babywise at different levels. If it doesn't suit you...then don't bag it out. Just find one that suits you. There are so many out there......

Mrs Little & Son.

[Tulp]

My younger sis used the principals of Babywise with her 2 little ones and the first one was sleeping through the night at 7 weeks and the 2nd at 8 weeks. Guess it works for her. We are reading it too now.

[the_queen]

Can I just ask, the people who are saying how great the book is because it helps babies to sleep "through the night", what exactly does that mean to you? Is it 12 hours, is it midnight till 7am, how many hours are we talking here??

[MamaSage]

I have not read the entire book, but have read alot about it. I think the likes of Ezzo need to realise that babies are people, not robots. And as for babies sleeping through the night at weeks old, what an unrealistic ezpectation! There will always be the odd few, but it is definitey NOT normal and mothers should not expect this as when it does not happen they will (of cousre) be upset and think something is wrong with them, their milk, their baby. Like someone else said - RUN!

[Goosie22]

Hi,

I think you need to be careful recommending a book you say "I have taken little bits from and ignored the rest as being to strict to follow". Its dangerous to recommend something you dont fully agree with as someone else might think you totally agree with every aspect of the book when in fact you dont. They take you recommendation as proof that everything in this book is OK to practice on their child because you obviously practice it on yours with no adverse effects.

Garry Ezzo is a Fundamentalist Christian with no actual training in childhood development. I suggest you follow the links posted earlier to find out what many others think.

[Pippi Longstocking]

I'm more likely to use these http://www.canismajor.com/dog/yobed.html tips on my child than I would be to use ezzos books.

[Mrs Little]

Hello everyone

I am visiting my daughter and have been interested in reading your thoughts about raising children. Ok I had my three beautiful children some 20 odd years ago and I only had my nursing experiences to draw on - but we all survived. I have three well adusted children who have grown into adults that are kind = loving and respectful of others and yes - they all sleep through the night ! :-)

What saddens me about what I have been reading is the harsh criticism you are giving each other - this forum is a wonderful medium and used properly can be a fantastic source of information and support. Used incorrectly it will become a medium which attacks the very heart of parenting - LOVE.

What does it matter whether a child sleeps through the night at a week old ( and no I don't believe a child can do that ) - what does it matter whether you watch the clock or feed every 10 mins ???? What DOES MATTER is that Mum is given as MUCH INFORMATION AS SHE CAN ASSIMILATE and that you give each other the credit each of you is due - that you can make informed decisions as to what is going to work in your own environment.

Please PLEASE - stop with the negativity and support each other with LOVE !! and continue using this forum for what it is meant - discussion - information and SUPPORT.

Thanks for listening and good luck to you all.

[Tam-I-Am]

Hi guys,

Just wanted to add my two cents - I am unfamiliar with the Ezzo books (aside from what I've read here).

I have never used any sleep books, I've used my own version of the feed-play-sleep routing since DD was 2 weeks old - and my own version of self-settling (that is, becomming familiar with DD's different cries, and responding appropriately - when upset or distressed responding immediately, when just whinging or whining off to sleep - letting it go unless or until she begins to get upset).

DD began "sleeping through" the night at 9 weeks of age. That is, she would have her final feed between 10:00pm - 11:00pm, and wake up at around 5am.

She is now 11 months old, and is a very contented and placid little soul. She knows that mum is always there when she needs me, and is independent enough to play on her own for limited amounts of time during the day - up to 20 minutes, while I'm in the room with her of course, but not necessarily entertaining her.

And I acheived this all by being the mother that my instincts told me to be. I don't pretend that I'm perfect - I'm certainly not that - but I do know my child.

Perhaps we should all have a little more faith in ourselves as parents, and remember that a parenting relationship is just like any other - you have to spend time getting to know your child.

Sorry, didn't mean to preach!

[Bubbamamma]

Clarabelle, I couldn't agree with you more! My little boy was a wonderful newborn, feeding every four hours night and day, and crying only when he needed something (food, winding, cuddles). I read the Babywise book on recommendation from a friend who had used it with her child, and started using its principles when he was 3 weeks old. After two days, he had gone from a happy little fellow to one who cried constantly and wanted to be held 24-7. It broke my heart. So I stopped trying to force the Babywise routine on him, and went back to letting him let me know what he needed. He is now 10 weeks old, and has only just started getting less clingy. I should have trusted my instincts and my child from the outset.

Oh, and he sleeps 6-hour stretches at night.

[Kristenfisher]

hi

was wondering if anyone had read the book ' on becoming babywise' and if so had they used the programs?
I would really like to hear other peoples experiences.

I started baby wise right from the begining. I absolutely love it. I think the book is right on as far as their information. My ten week old baby sleeps through the night about 9 1/2 hours. She take 3 naps a day that last about 2 hours, She is such a happy and content baby, and when she cries I know why. I would recommend the book to anyone. All of my girlfriends who have used these principles have such good babies. But you do have to remember to be flexalble. Good luck

[jessgray]

Hello everyone

I am visiting my daughter and have been interested in reading your thoughts about raising children. Ok I had my three beautiful children some 20 odd years ago and I only had my nursing experiences to draw on - but we all survived. I have three well adusted children who have grown into adults that are kind = loving and respectful of others and yes - they all sleep through the night ! :-)

What saddens me about what I have been reading is the harsh criticism you are giving each other - this forum is a wonderful medium and used properly can be a fantastic source of information and support. Used incorrectly it will become a medium which attacks the very heart of parenting - LOVE.

What does it matter whether a child sleeps through the night at a week old ( and no I don't believe a child can do that ) - what does it matter whether you watch the clock or feed every 10 mins ???? What DOES MATTER is that Mum is given as MUCH INFORMATION AS SHE CAN ASSIMILATE and that you give each other the credit each of you is due - that you can make informed decisions as to what is going to work in your own environment.

Please PLEASE - stop with the negativity and support each other with LOVE !! and continue using this forum for what it is meant - discussion - information and SUPPORT.

Thanks for listening and good luck to you all.

well said:thumbsup:

i havent heard of the books are they helping ? if they are who cares:D

[Snow Mum]

Hey
it is important to remember that the writters of babywise say (on the cover) "A Guide..." there is no exact way of raising childern.
As a frist time mum I found babywise a great help. It gave me and idea about what to do with my bundle of joy. My son wasn't always perfict, but the sleep, eat, play routine helped me through the rough patches.
You cannot expect your baby to exactly on time for each of the activities but if you remember that babies are like us, have hungery days or sleeply days ( or the exact oposite), the babywise routine works well.
I love babywise it gave me some sanity when all else was lost! My son had colic and was always on a growth spuit, but with the help of babywise we had our son sleeping through at 4 and half months!
Read it and use what works for you, not one baby is the same! Have a go.

love snow mum
P.S. do you have the revisied adition

[borntobemummy]

just wanted to say, that we applied the book to our DD and it worked wonders for us:thumbsup:

[Tulp]

DS is now 5 months. We used the sleep/eat/play routine too and it helped very much right from day one. Of course there were times when you go out of routine but having a routine was a big help. DS has been sleeping through the night from 11 weeks and every nap we put him down to he settles himself to sleep. No issues at all. It's worked wonders for us.

[jessgray]

it sounds like a great book why are so many against it:confused:

[the_queen]

it sounds like a great book why are so many against it:confused:

Have a read of THIS (http://www.ezzo.info)website and see if you still think it sounds great.

I just don't like "baby trainers".

[mimi]

it sounds like a great book why are so many against it:confused:

And this one ...
http://www.nospank.net/dribben.htm

And this
http://www.nospank.net/granju2.htm

From my first link..

...the cautionary sentences telling parents not to be too rigid are few and far between in the text...

It contradicts much of what has been learned about infant development since the 1950s. It creates unrealistic expectations, makes wild claims about the connection between eating and sleeping cycles, and could damage the relationship between parents and children... followed zealously, the program could even lead to child abuse.

On Becoming Babywise is a bad book. One of many, promising fool-proof methods to raise perfect kids. They'll keep coming, because they sell. And they'll sell because people want to believe there's an easy way. There isn't.

[emilysmumma]

I have such guilt because of this book.
It was recommended to me by a midwife who even wrote it down for me, so when my DD was 3 weeks of age I bought it.

I at that time completley agreed with it. So much so I got the second book for toddlers way in advanced.
It's when I started to read that book was when things started to click that something wasn't quite right.
About the same time I read somewhere that Ezzo was a fundamentalist and so I did a google search.

I felt sick. Sick that I let my brand new baby daughter suffer to cry in her cot without the warmth and love from the one who could give it to her.
Sick that I let myself be led by something that I thought had authority just because it was published.

I try not to think of those days of letting her cry as it makes me cry.

As I woke up to the fact early enough that it was wrong, we have a happy ending and we have a lovely little girl. If you just rely on your own instinct and follow loosely some advice by someone who actually knows the realistic side of things you will be fine.

[jessgray]

thanks guys. i am in shock a self proclaimed expert can make such a book:thumbsdown: thats so dangerous:no:

[Tulp]

Yes we read the book, yes we kept to the routine. But we also used our instincts. I don't agree with everything in the book but it provides a framework to where you and your family can pattern your lives to predictable patterns.

We didn't follow the book 100%. When DS cried, we checked if he was clean and if he was fed and full so what else could there be?? Uncomfortable tummy, want cuddles? We used our instincts. When you have babies, you need to use your instincts. DS is a healthy, happy and alert baby. He is able to entertain himself, settle himself and is just such a joy. I am not saying it's all because of Baby Wise. I believe it's because we had a routine, it kept us sane, we were not flustered, and DS probably picks up on our calmness.

Now at 5 months DS is so predictable on his feed/play/sleep requirements it's truly amazing. We know when to put him down for his nap and especially at nite when he goes down for the day he knows that it's not playing time and it's sleep time. We say his night prayers, put him in his sleeping bag, he smiles at us, we kiss him goodnight and leave his room. He settles himself to sleep. Not a peep out of him. Babies need routine. This is what I've learnt from Babywise.

Don't ever ever believe everything you read. Go with instinct and do what you feel is right. Use what is useful to you and what works. There is always new things to learn. No one way is fullproof.

My two cents worth.

[annb]

Tulp I agree with you 100%. I also read babywise and took from it what I wanted, I also read Gina Ford and Tizzie Hall and follow routines that I think work. If I hadnt have read any of these books quite honestly I dont think I would have had such success with my 2yr olds sleeping patterns or my new born 5wk old

[mimi]

... I also read babywise and took from it what I wanted, I also read Gina Ford and Tizzie Hall and follow routines that I think work...
Great idea to read as much as you can! To add some balance, maybe try ...
'The (New) Baby Book' by Dr William Sears ( http://www.askdrsears.com/ ),
'Parenting By Heart', '100 Ways To Calm The Crying' or 'Sleeping Like a Baby' by Pinky McKay ( http://pinky-mychild.com/index.html )
and definitely something by Dr James McKenna ( http://www.naturalchild.com/james_mckenna/ ) :thumbsup:

Arm yourself with as much well-researched information as possible, then, as has already been said, go with your deepest, heart-felt instincts.

As parents, we all want what is best for our kids ... we just tend to get a bit 'side-tracked' by the constant 'blahhhh' of those that try to tell us that there is a 'better/easier/quicker/more convenient' way to do these things for our children. Best to keep in mind, though, that our babies will, only too soon(!), be grown and gone from our lives in many ways ... and when we comfort them, honour their needs, cuddle them to sleep etc we are not spoiling them - we are teaching them to LOVE and showing them how to act with COMPASSION. :yelclap:
Got to be good for everyone!:yes:

[princesslover18]

Hello everyone

I am visiting my daughter and have been interested in reading your thoughts about raising children. Ok I had my three beautiful children some 20 odd years ago and I only had my nursing experiences to draw on - but we all survived. I have three well adusted children who have grown into adults that are kind = loving and respectful of others and yes - they all sleep through the night ! :-)

What saddens me about what I have been reading is the harsh criticism you are giving each other - this forum is a wonderful medium and used properly can be a fantastic source of information and support. Used incorrectly it will become a medium which attacks the very heart of parenting - LOVE.

What does it matter whether a child sleeps through the night at a week old ( and no I don't believe a child can do that ) - what does it matter whether you watch the clock or feed every 10 mins ???? What DOES MATTER is that Mum is given as MUCH INFORMATION AS SHE CAN ASSIMILATE and that you give each other the credit each of you is due - that you can make informed decisions as to what is going to work in your own environment.

Please PLEASE - stop with the negativity and support each other with LOVE !! and continue using this forum for what it is meant - discussion - information and SUPPORT.

Thanks for listening and good luck to you all.
Well Said I couldn't agree more!
No matter how we all do things is no concern of anyone elses. So please tell me why we get into the mother bashing to try to make people feel bad because they do something different. This mother was asking for advice not a flogging!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Susan Mac]

Do you know what? I don't touch parenting books with a ten foot pole.

I get sick of "experts" telling me that this method will get your baby sleeping through the night/putting themself to sleep. I get sick of "experts" telling me I need to do this or that or the other. I don't want to be guilt tripped into thinking that I'm a bad mother because I'm not doing a books list of thigns.

If I'm a little unsure about something I'll check on a credible webiste that I trust, or, more commonly, I ask one of a handful of mums I know and trust. People who I have seen have had babies grow up to be normal people, or people who have babies now and I like their syle and trust their opinion.

And I go with my instinct. We had been planning that after Jack turned one we would try and help him ditch the 2 am feed, stop him feeding to sleep, and help him go to sleep by himself. After a few days I worked out that he just isn't ready. (This was my boy who I couldn't put down for the first few days, he just needed to be held, even when he was 'asleep'. he was 8 weeks old before he slept longer than 2 hours)

if a book works for you, go for it, but don't hang everything on what an author says is the best thing for baby. Mothers have been raising babies successfully for thousands of years without them.

[MissyMaloo]

Read it. Read the whole thing. Then only take from it what suits your parenting style and only if it works...

It works for me and my baby never had to cry himself to sleep. I just used the feed, wake, sleep guidelines and have a breast fed baby sleeping 9 hours from 9pm to 6am and then 3 hourly through the day (unless he's hungry before)...

This means I can plan my day and the baby and I are both getting the sleep we need.

My baby was premmy and started out behind the 8ball, but with a proper FLEXIBLE feeding GUIDELINE he's now out in front.

Do what works and ditch the rest...
I find it utterly ridiculous to blame the results of literal interpretation of a book on the writers of the book... It's just another example of people not taking responsibility for their own actions. GenY - You're FAMOUS for it. :yes:

I know many people that read this book and then went on to have happy, well rested, well fed babies... None of them are cruel or let their babies get distressed. They just took control with a flexible routine and the rest just fell into place.

[Cheli]

I have read the book babywise and know many others who have. Several of us had children who were being fed using demand feeding techniques suggested in the hospital and by GP's and each one of us had children who didn't thrive or put on enough weight. Once a routine was established, using suggestions from the babywise books, our children all started to thrive, putting on good amounts of weight for their age (according to doctors and other baby/parenting books).

Another thing to note is that I have heard that one of the first ways to treat mum's with postnatal depression is to ensure that they are getting enough sleep each night. The babywise book offers suggestions of ways to help babies learn the difference between night and day, and to help them to sleep at night, therefore helping the mum's get the rest that they need to care for their children.

The book suggests a routine, but also says that a hungry child should be fed. The main thing to focus on is having a baby eat a full meal instead of snacking. This is what my first child did, eating and then sleeping straight away and ended up loosing over 10% of their body weight, which worried doctors and midwives. I followed the suggestions in the book with my second child, rather than wait until he woke up to feed, and he lost some weight after birth, but only in the 10% that is ok.

All baby books are bound to get things wrong, and all have a lot to offer. There's no point saying that everything in this book is bad, and that other books have it all right. After all, the writers are only human, and I haven't met a perfect one yet!

[Annabella]

I'm actually surprised by how many people are against babywise. Hardly anyone I know has even heard of it! However, I was given this book by a friend (who didn't et have kids) when I was pregnant with my first child at the age of 22. Although I have been around babies my whole life, I was a bit worried about having my own etc and read it, along with a few others. At the time I thought it sounded good in theory, but doubted it could work so well in practise. And that its sounded maybe a little bit harsh. I don't personally think it hurts a baby to let them cry a little bit, but sometimes it just sounded too mean! Also my pregnancy was unplanned and my partner was only half supportive, the book makes a lot of assumptions that you're married, happy families etc which annoyed me a lot (but hey, don't they all!!!).

However, I did it when my daughter was born, and I would honestly say that this book was the SINGLE BEST THING anyone gave me to prepare me for parenting. My baby was not particularly easy, she cried every night for 2-3 hours between the hrs o4 5-9pm til she was 3 months old, but Babywise actually says this often happens, don't stress etc. Babis have growth spurts where they feed more often, go with it. And my favourite- "The routine is there to serve you, you are not there to serve the routine". So yes, have a routine, but if you need to break it, its no big deal. And it doesn't say the baby HAS to sleep through the night at 8 weeks, just that it is normal to if they are following this pattern.

The most important thing I got from it tho was just the feed, play, sleep pattern, ie DON'T FEED YOUR BABY TO SLEEP. I followed it fairly loosely, my lifestyle doesn't have a lot of routine so I wasn't too rigid with it, but definitley followed the basic principle.

My children are both very content, well adjusted kids who know there are boundaries but who also know I love them more than anything. I have breastfed for longer and more successfully than any of my friends, and have had better rest due to my kids sleeping well. People are also always happy to babysit my kids as they are 'easy' to take care of, knowing roughly when they will need to feed and sleep.

Obviously parents must follow their instincts and if your baby is hungry, and you KNOW they are hungry, you feed them. However I felt as a 1st time mum that having a 'guide' really gave me the confidence and knowledge to do what was best for my babies.

The friend who gave me the book now has kids and follows it a lot more strictly than I did and her son is very well behaved, a lovely little boy. I personally couldn't follow it as much as her (not disciplined enough!!) and didn't go onto the toddler book but would recommend it to anyone and will definitely use it for my next kid.

[Jwren]

Babywise was recommended to me by four mums while I was pregnant, and my daughter, now 8 months, is healthy, happy and has slept right through the night from 10 weeks. The method is simply wake your baby for a full feed every 3 hours, followed by a play/wake time then put baby to bed while sleepy but awake (but don't wake them at night). My baby's metabolism regulated to this straight away so she didn't want food inbetween and I had a stable milk production. Falling asleep in her cot is normal, so when she wakes during the night she doesn't cry for attention, she just talks a bit and goes back to sleep.

Babywise says something along the lines of 'a cuddle will comfort a startled baby, burping will relieve a windy baby, sleep will comfort a tired baby and food will satisfy a hungry baby' - ie feed your baby if he/she is hungry, but not just because they cry. Babywise says it's the parents who have common sense, experience and understanding, and the baby needs their guidance to establish healthy eating and sleeping paterns.

My baby had a predictable fussy period between about 5-7pm every day for a couple of months but now hardly ever cries - she doesn't need to - her needs are met, she has regular food, enough sleep and plenty of love and play. She is a healthy, secure and friendly baby.

I hear about other babies who need to be fed to sleep several times a night and demand milk constantly throughout the day - why do parents train their children to be demanding and needy? How do they cope on so little sleep? I can't understand why there is any controversy about Babywise. I highly recommend it.

[Tam-I-Am]

You've got to be kidding, right? Luckily for you, it sounds like you've never had a sick or temperamental baby who just fits into a routine. FYI, some babies have reflux, or silent reflux, or special needs, or are just 'clingy' babies, and forcing them to fit into a routine that doesn't suit their needs, temperament, or emotional needs isn't going to make them learn how to sleep or feed on a 3 hourly schedule - it's just going to distress them and make them MORE clingy.

My first baby was a 'textbook' baby, in terms of feeding approximately 3 hourly and sleeping on cue. What a shock it was to have a baby who had silent reflux and just couldn't sleep on his back for the first 9 - 12 months of his life, or feed in a 3 hourly pattern. And how cruel it would have been of me to try and force him to, simply out of my own selfish need to have a regular routine.

People are all different. We all need different amounts of sleep, food, and affection - and sometimes it changes on a daily basis too. I don't know why people persist with outdated and harmful ideas that babies are little robot clones who can be 'trained' like animals to only have their needs met when their parents are good and ready to meet them.

[kar]

Jeten surely you are kidding??? I didn't train F to be a difficult baby! He had reflux, an active alert temperament and wasn't a bkardy robot! He needed his mamma. A lot. I am so si glad I gave him what he needed. At 1 he is an independent, cheerful, adventurous wonderfully loving sleeping boy. I wouldn't change a thing.
If your sole goal in the early months (or weeks WTF is that aboutUSIA to get your baby to sleep through the night maybe these types of books will help. If you give
other things priority follow your instincts.

[kar]

Sorry, bad angry iPhone typing!

[twotrunks]

I cannot believe how many people are saying: "baby slept through at 7/10/12 weeks, so it must work". Babies of that age should not be sleeping through!!! Yes the odd one will, but they are not naturally designed to go that long without food. And if you let them cry themselves to sleep, guess what? They haven't been trained, they've just gone into shock and learned that their parents cannot be relied upon. And the damage all of this causes may not be apparent right now, but years and years down the track.
Sorry to be so harsh, I have just been reading some of Steve Biddulph's work, and have had my eyes opened up enormously about babies and what they need. And our love, attention and affection are the main things. They shouldn't have to go for 12 hours without it as small babies.
TT

[brogeybear]

I got halfway down the first page and realised that if I read any further it could turn into a debate, so hear is my straight reply to the OP:

I have read On Becoming Babywise since a friend gave it to me. I have to say, that from what I can remember, it did make sense to an extent, but I don't think it would be sensible to follow it to the letter. It has been 2 years, so lets see how I go.

I remember that I did follow the advice to feed, play, sleep and found this practical. I also followed a loose 3 hour cycle. I don't personally find that babies will feed every 1/2 hour to hour after the first week, and IMO if they are feeding that regularly after 2 weeks it does indicate that they are not having full feeds and are rather, snacking.
You have to remember that breastmilk is watery at the start and richer and more nourishing toward the end of a feeding. If a baby is having short, frequent feedings, they are not being satisfied with the rich hind milk.

I also believe that babies need to learn the difference between night and day, but do not advocate controlled crying. I think this book did, although not as fanatically as some others. DS was sleeping from 10pm til 6am from 8 weeks and from 6pm til 6am from 12 weeks. I do think that this is important, though not the most important thing, because just as we are not our best with a lack of sleep, neither will baby be. Babies do need a lot more sleep than we as adults do as well.

Remember that you and your family were there first and baby will adapt to your routine, the world does not revolve around baby and what I mean by this is that, having a baby is a normal part of life. While it can take a few weeks to adjust, it doesn't mean you have to change your whole routine becuase baby needs to feed at 10 and sleep at 11:30...

Do what works for you and your family. Personally a lack of sleep would not work for me. I will attempt to teach all of my children to sleep through at an early age, in a gentle and reassuring manner. If they would not, I would probably have them sleep with me. Work out what is really important to you and your family; sleep is my big necessity! LOL I will try anything, bar CC (sorry, I just find it really mean, they're only little for such a shor period of time and they dont yet know how to sleep, w need to teach them, not torment them...sorry for rant) in order to get regular sleep.

Read the book and take bits and peices that you think will work for your family, but IMO don't follow it like a law. I am amazed at the vast variety of baby/sleep books out there and have to admit to wondering what ever happened to our natural instinct and confidence in our own ability as parents. I think it is sad that we feel the need to follow a regime in a book, rather than ourselves.

Thats my opinion anyway. Hope you find a nice balance.

[justmum]

Interesting :detective:

Missymaloo, Cheli and Jwren's first and only posts are about this book. Do I sniff the authors / people acting on their behalf doing an internet search to bring up critical discussions about Babywise so they can then extol the virtues of this method of baby training with their miraculous first hand accounts of how their babies were literally saved from being needy little blighters by this magnificent book?

Well yes, since I asked, yes I do. :rolleyes:

[Raising Leprechauns]

Had it. Read it. Tried it. Sold it on ebay. :no:

[Raising Leprechauns]

I hear about other babies who need to be fed to sleep several times a night and demand milk constantly throughout the day - why do parents train their children to be demanding and needy? How do they cope on so little sleep? I can't understand why there is any controversy about Babywise. I highly recommend it.

How do I cope on so little sleep?? NFI! Until now! It's my fault!! I've trained my DD to be up at all hours, scream and vomit and poo and breath hold........ how stupid of me not to have seen it before. As you seem to know more than my Paed and Ngala and the variety of sleep clinics we have attended - come on over and sort her out. My problems are solved. :smiliedance:

[Refresh]

I do nearly everything Babywise says to do - in opposite land. :laughing:

[Jwren]

Interesting :detective:

Missymaloo, Cheli and Jwren's first and only posts are about this book. Do I sniff the authors / people acting on their behalf doing an internet search to bring up critical discussions about Babywise so they can then extol the virtues of this method of baby training with their miraculous first hand accounts of how their babies were literally saved from being needy little blighters by this magnificent book?

:rolleyes:

Yes, my first post was about Babywise because I signed up to have my say about it. I'm a real mum of an 8 month old girl in Tas. I don't spend much time on the internet, but that doesn't make my experience or opinion fake. Babywise was recommended to me by four mums while I was preganant - in fact, it was the only feed/sleep method recommended to me by anyone. If people find that attachment parenting or demand feeding work well for them then great, do that. Obviously there are differing theories that work and that create healthy, happy babies. For me Babywise was perfect and I'll use it again.

[Opinionated]

I read some of it. When I got to the bits that were detrimental to a good breastfeeding relationship I canned it.

Any program may suit some babies, however no program will suit all. Babywise may suit formula fed babies with parents that want them to be independent beyond their age. It wouldn't ever suit my family and it could never suit all babies. Humans are all different and unique and need treated as such.

It makes me sad to hear of babies being called needy. Um der! They are largely immobile, incontinent, with limited cognitive skills and unable of meeting any of their own needs. Of course they are needy. They are meant to be:confused:

[LeanneJO]

We read this book before our DS was born on the recommendations of friends and found it very useful. It's not so strict really, you just need to make sure your baby eats, plays and then sleeps, not being fed to sleep, which is good sense and have also seen in other non-babywise books. I have found that people using the general ideas and methods in the book definitely have children that sleep better and through the night at an earlier age.
I have also read that children on the BabyWise method could be undernourished as you try not to feed more than 3 hourly but my little boy was just breastfed every 3-4 hours and was really chubby until he started to move!
So have a read, take from it what you want, and leave the bits you find too extreme or whatever and decide for yourself!

[presley]

This is what I got from babywise:

*Just because baby cries, doesn't always mean they are hungry. Think, listen and asess - are they crying because they are hungry? Or is it something else that needs dealing with (reflux/wind/overtiredness etc). It's not always a sign to begin the next feed. I found this really helpful as sometimes Bub just needs some help resettling to go back down for another 45mins sleep - not just assuming that because he woke up and was crying that means he's hungry - especially if it's only been say 1.5 hrs since his last feed. Sometimes I get it wrong, he won't settle and so that's him telling me he IS hungry nd I get him up for a feed.

*Generally, for my babies, a more settled day leads to a more settled night, and a happier bub. So I try and keep an eye on his day sleeps as I know it makes him happier at night (after an unsettled day his sleep is lighter, he frowns in his sleep instead of looking floppy and relaxed). I have in no way forced him into sleeping overnight (I don't think that's humanly possible anyway) but I have noticed that when bub gets good day sleep and I don't keep him up too long, so he doesn't get overtired, he sleeps for longer stretches at night.

Having said that - I found him pretty smug and condescending. ANd I completely disagree with his stance that you can CC babies as young as a few weeks old. I think that's outrageous - my stance on that is that if bub can't get to sleep as they're overtired (which generally is why my bub can't sleep - previously it was silent reflux which he has grown out of) then it's my fault for not getting him down to sleep in time so I need to help him as much as I can to sleep - cuddles/rock/whatever. If a routine works, then great, but if it doesn't, then bub shouldn't be punished.

I also don't think there's enough encouragement to follow your instincts - if bub is sick or there's something wrong and you let them cry then that's awful. I think we need to be encouraged to throw the routine out the window sometimes.

[milklady]

Interesting :detective:

Missymaloo, Cheli and Jwren's first and only posts are about this book. Do I sniff the authors / people acting on their behalf doing an internet search to bring up critical discussions about Babywise so they can then extol the virtues of this method of baby training with their miraculous first hand accounts of how their babies were literally saved from being needy little blighters by this magnificent book?

Well yes, since I asked, yes I do. :rolleyes:

:laughing::iagree:

I was going to say the same thing justmum, because I noticed that too. I thought it was strange that some people were defending the book a bit too fiercly especially for their first ever post on Bubhub?!?

Someone needs to uphold the book's reputation to keep up the sales!!!

Yep I sure smelt a rat.....

Anyhoo....my opinion to the OP. Don't read that book!! Read Dr Sears or Pinky Mckay or just read the baby.

:)

[jenine74]

Wow, this is my first time posting on this forum. I have to say I am disappointed that there is so much negativity on a site that is supposed to support mothers. I am particularly sad that just because some people have posted a positive experience with this book you would assume they were the authors! Does this mean we can't have a contrary opinion to you without being devious?

Well I have used Babywise, and like I do with everything I read regarding the raising of my child I use what works for me and disregard the rest.

No my baby is not yet sleeping through the night and if he doesn't for the next few months I will not be distressed. But I do know that he is happy and well. I do not feed him everytime he cries - because I know that is not always what he needs. I do have a routine I try to work to - and if it doesn't seem to be working for him on a given day then I make the adjustments he seems to need. All of this is encouraged by the authors of Babywise as they do say that flexibility is a key to good parenting!

So. To clarify. I am not an author of Becoming Babywise. It has some very common sense advice that i like and have used and if others get some value out of it then great! use what works for you and if you or your baby are unhappy then search for something else that works.

[Cazarol]

Wow, this is my first time posting on this forum. I have to say I am disappointed that there is so much negativity on a site that is supposed to support mothers. I am particularly sad that just because some people have posted a positive experience with this book you would assume they were the authors! Does this mean we can't have a contrary opinion to you without being devious?

Well I have used Babywise, and like I do with everything I read regarding the raising of my child I use what works for me and disregard the rest.

No my baby is not yet sleeping through the night and if he doesn't for the next few months I will not be distressed. But I do know that he is happy and well. I do not feed him everytime he cries - because I know that is not always what he needs. I do have a routine I try to work to - and if it doesn't seem to be working for him on a given day then I make the adjustments he seems to need. All of this is encouraged by the authors of Babywise as they do say that flexibility is a key to good parenting!

So. To clarify. I am not an author of Becoming Babywise. It has some very common sense advice that i like and have used and if others get some value out of it then great! use what works for you and if you or your baby are unhappy then search for something else that works.
Completely agree with you Jenine74!

I've read it and follow some of the principles and honestly don't understand what all the fuss is about! It follows many of the same principles as Save Our Sleep which seems to be highly regarded, without being nearly as rigid.

My advice is to read it and take from it what suits you!

[milklady]

Geez I thought I killed this conversation a fair while ago...:laughing: Did you have to dig back a little to find this one or did you do a search to find threads about the babywise book?

Sorry if we seem to be a little suspicious, but five people became new members on Bubhub just to post their extremely positive experience of this book on this thread, and have not posted anything else since...which is just so very strange!!! No-one was having a go at the people who said the book worked for them, only just recognising the unusual coincidence of all the first-time posters, thats all.

I suppose I feel strongly in my personal opinion that the advice in this book is very wrong. I read the book myself when my baby was very young, I was searching for answers to why my baby would only sleep for 45 mins at a time! (I now know that this is very common for babies of that age). I began doubting the way I was parenting, the book told me I shouldn't nurse by baby to sleep, that he should learn to fall asleep on his own. Thats why he woke after one sleep cycle. Apparently. When I started following the book not only did my son start to become very unhappy, we began to feel disconnected to each other, our bond was breaking, I no longer felt like I knew him, and I started spiralling into depression.
When I realised this wasn't right, I continued my search for information, I read everything I could find, and I found out why we were becoming so unhappy...I was following the book, not my heart or my own instincts, I now know that attachment parenting is what babies need, to be with their parents always, nursed or rocked to sleep, co-sleeping, carried and fed on demand, and thankfully my son and I have bonded again. We are both so very happy now, I just know in my heart that this is how I am supposed to parent my son.

I deeply regret that I had ever read that book, and I fear for the parents that might travel down the same sad pathway that I did. Thats why I feel so strongly about this...that in my opinion that book gives bad advice.

Just follow your heart, and be with your baby.

[kribby]

Geez I thought I killed this conversation a fair while ago...:laughing: Did you have to dig back a little to find this one or did you do a search to find threads about the babywise book?

Sorry if we seem to be a little suspicious, but five people became new members on Bubhub just to post their extremely positive experience of this book on this thread, and have not posted anything else since...which is just so very strange!!! No-one was having a go at the people who said the book worked for them, only just recognising the unusual coincidence of all the first-time posters, thats all.


I totally agree this is the second or third time I've seen this thread resserected it does seem strange and a tad fishy! I'm sorry if that offends anyone but it is strange! I Also wonder if they are searching posts?
I don't wanna put anyone off the site it's wonderful and helped me a lot but it does seem weird it keeps popping up!
if I see a thread this old in search I tend to just start a new one!?!? I dunno I just found it stangr to see it yet again in new posts! Not a bad thing just strange

[kribby]

And I dunno about post counts or anything I don't look when I'm on my pc and I'm usually on my phone anyway so I can't see but it's been resserected 6/7 times always by positive opinions on the book. I have no opinion I've never read it and I don't judge others on how they choose to raise their children or what books they read! If the book worked for you great! If it didn't then glad you realised and moved on!

[Lateralus]

I read the book when DD was quite young - to be 100% honest I can't exactly remember the recommendations of the book word for word as I was mightily sleep deprived when I read it, but I do remember that I didn't like it. In my opinion it was too harsh and rigid a routine to enforce on a newborn. We must be the only mammals on this planet who don't give our very young food and comfort whenever they seek it, all in the name of a good nights sleep!

[pinkroseinthedesert]

This book has brought our household a lot of peace. My baby was a preemie and she would sometimes fall asleep while feeding despite my attempts to keep her awake so I wasn't as strict as I should have been. She started sleeping through the night at 14 weeks (10 weeks adjusted). The book was given to me as a gift by a friend who had had success with the whole series. The book arrived a week after I had demand fed and by then I was fatigued. Looking for a light at the end of the tunnel, the promise of my baby sleeping through the night was like gold and I was willing to try the plan. I know women who have breast fed successfully on the plan but I had to supplement. As I said before, my baby was a preemie and found breast feeding tiring. Although I was bitterly disappointed at not breastfeeding exclusively, I did what was best for the health of me and my child.

Put simply, Babywise is worth its weight in gold because it gives our days some structure and allows me and my baby a good night's sleep.

[Mathermy]

This is not something I would ever consider for my family :no: