View Full Version : I'm a little bit lost
As some of you might know DP and I lost our little baby sometime between Wednesday and Monday I had a D&C today and I am feeling a little lost like the whole world is moving but im standing still. I think it is just the shock of having something you wanted so so so much and something you loved so much more then you ever imagined you could taken away from you. Im getting by ok and cant wait to start trying agian as im not going to let this get me two down.
I have come to the conclusion that my baby was too beautiful for this world and is watching over me all the time.
Is it wrong to want another baby agian so quickly does it mean im a bad person or that I didnt love this baby. i just feel like I would just be replacing this baby with another.
For all you women out there who have lost bubs you are all truly very strong women I have offered advise and sympathy for years now without fully understanding the emotions and hurt that a women goes through when they loose their babies its something words can not describe.
Take care all
OMG krystal, i didnt know. :crying:
i am so sorry!!! :hugs:
You poor thing.
And no i dont think its wrong to want to get pg again soon. :hugs:
I'm so sorry for your loss- big hugs to you :hugs: . I don't think it's wrong to start trying for another baby as soon as you want to. You won't be replacing your little angel- he/she will always be with you, in your heart, thoughts and looking down from heaven!
Be gentle with yourself at this time
Honey :hugs: to you!
You are certainly not a bad person for wanting another baby. It's something you have dreamed of for so long and even though you were only pregnant for 8 weeks, you would have done anything for your baby, which means you loved it more than anything.
You're feeling perfectly normal, but only you can really decided when you're ready to start trying again.
What ever you decided your beautiful baby is watching over you knowing how much it was loved by you.
Im so sorry to hear about ur loss :hugs:
I dont think its selfish to want another baby straight away, After my miscarriage i pretty much got pregnant straight away and its a great thing! It doesnt mean you dont love your other baby any less.
Hope you feel better soon!! :hugs: Big hugs to you!!
Krystal I am so sorry to hear about your precious little bub :crying: I can't imagine the conflicting emotions you must be feeling but I don't believe that it is wrong for you to want to continue your journey to become parents as soon as you feel ready. :hugs: to you.
hey Krystal :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
I am so sorry for your loss. :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
You are not a bad person for wanting to start again. Best wishes and take care of yourself.:kiss:
Hi Krystal- Oh darling i am truely sorry for your loss.
It is not a bad thing or you are not a bad person for wanting to TTC again you are just like me you want to me a mum and why should you feel bad for wanting that.
People say you should wait until your emotional stable to TTC again but been through 2 losses it does get easier as time passes but the pain never goes away for our lost little angels.
My adivce would be TTC When you feel it's the right time you will know when that is.
We TTC after my 1st AF with this one..
again i am very sorry :hugs:and :kiss: to yuo sweetie.
If you ever want to chat please PM me.
Take care fo yourself. I am sure our angels are all palying together looking down on us.
Krystal, I am very sorry about your loss. I agree with the others, you are not a bad person for wanting to try again quickly. Best wishes to you and your dh:hugs:
Im sorry to hear of your loss :hugs:
Its not wrong to want to try again i think anyone can understand why you want to try again but just remember to let yourself grieve & use us all here when you need to talk, cry or vent.
Take care of yourself :hugs:
im sorry to hear about your loss, and you defniately arn't a bad person for wanting to try again :hugs:
Krystal - I am so very sorry. :hugs:
Everything you are feeling is very legitimate, you are allowed to gieve and mourn, you are allowed to want to try again. The way you describe the world continuing while you've stopped is so familiar. It is a heartbreaking situation, and one that sadly many many women go through.
We are all here with you krystal, if you need any support, we can talk to you. I'm thinking of you. Be kind to yourself and give yourself space to heal emotionally.
:hugs: :kiss: to you...
You are not a bad person to want to try again.
Your little angel was to perfect for this earth, it was sent back to heaven to watch over you! You should try again, your body is ready for it.
If you wanna chat feel free to add me to msn or send me a pm. Look forward to hearing when your blessed again...
Im so sorry for your loss :hugs: I miscarried nearly 2 months ago and am desp to get pg soon !!!!
sending hugs your way !!!:hugs:
Oh Krystal I am so sorry to hear your news. :hugs: :hugs:
Everyone is so different in how they respond to a loss but if you and DH feel ready to try again then there is nothing bad about that at all - you aren't going to forget your angel, you just want a brother or sister for him or her to hold in your arms.
I am so sorry for your loss. I cant imagine how painful this has been for you. I just wanted to offer lots of hugs :hugs:
Take care of yourself and take as much time as you need to reflect.
Krystal - I was wondering how you were only today. I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I hope that the lovely advice here brings you some comfort and that you find a way through this. Wanting another baby will not diminish the feelings you had for the one that you lost, in the same way that having a second child born alive doesn't diminish the feelings for the child you already have - the heart has capacity for infinite love - and of course, infinite pain when the object of our love leaves us. Wishing you healing vibes......:hugs:
So sorry to here your sad news :hugs:
I recently went through the same thing and I was 13weeks, except the baby was fine on ultrasound about an hour before I lost him?? It's absolutely horrible to go through this, and most of the time theres no explanation for it, but it does get better, you won't forget but you will heal.
We are ttc already! So no, I don't think you should feel guilty for wanting to replace your lost bub, its completely normal. I felt the same. I guess just make sure your body is healthy and hormones are back to normal before you ttc so you are in a good state of mind and body for your next pregnancy.
Please feel free to pm me if you want to talk, and look after yourself....... always remember your bub is watching over you. :hugs:
Krystal - I have sent you a PM but I just wanted to give you another hug... Take some time to grieve, rest and dont be too hard on yourself. I hope to hear from you soon!
Krystal, I am so sorry to hear of your loss.
Losing your baby is so devastating and it is such a hard journey to travel. Your angel will always live in your hearts and you will never forget the dreams and the joy that they brought to you in your pregnancy.
When I lost my baby, I also thought that somehow I wouldn't be 'respecting' her if I was to get pregnant again. I now see it that she sacrificed herself to look after her little brother and to help him safely into this world. If we hadn't lost her, we would never have had a chance to meet and grow with our little boy - bittersweet but true.
Take care of yourself and DP and TTC whenever you feel comfortable. Only you can make that decision. Just know that your baby is watching you and will always be part of your life.
So many hugs for you,:hugs: :hugs:
Oh Krystal I had no idea! I am so terribly sorry to hear about your loss.
I certainly dont think wanting to try again for another baby is a bad thing, and wish you all the best. Your little angel will always be in your heart
I promise you as a woman who lost a daughter before my son was born, no matter when you fall pregnant again, no matter how much you love your next child, your angel will always hold a special place in your heart.
My feelings about my daughter and my loss didn't change when Tom came along, I still grieve for my daughter, but I wanted to be the mother of an earth angel too!
:hugs: to you Krystal... i hadnt heard... i am so sorry for your loss
dont feel bad for wanting to get pregnant again...
another baby wont ever replace your angel and you know that... but its ok for you to want a baby to hold in your arms...
There's not much that i can say that hasn't already been said.
I am in the same position as you. I lost my bub at 12 weeks and had a D&C last week. I too am eager to TTC asap and went through the guilty feelings that are all too natural in these situations. I wish you and your DP all the best in TTC again and who knows, we may be in the same Due In Group together some time soon.:fingerscrossed:
I really am sorry to hear of your sad news and please know that i am thinking of you right now. Please PM me if you want to talk about anything.
I'm sorry to hear that Krystal. Losing a baby at any stage of a pregnancy is hard. Take care of yourself.:hugs:
Krystal, sending lots of :hugs: to you!
Hi Krystal. I'm also in the same position. I had a M/C recently, and am already dying to start TTC again. I haven't felt guilty for wanting to start again so soon - it was a horrible thing, but its nothing I can change, so I have to look forward and be positive about the future. I just know we'll both have BFP's again soon!!!
I'm so sorry Krystal :hugs:
I got pg straight after my m/c so I obviously don't think it's bad to want to try again soon! I knew that waiting to TTC wouldn't bring my other baby back, and I think it has helped me to heal to be pg again. I'm not suggesting you rush things of course, but like all the others have said, it's not wrong to try again. I think the feelings you have after a m/c are some of the hardest you'll ever experience - do try to take things easy :hugs: :hugs:
I didn't know either Krystal - I'm so sorry.
:hugs: to you and to your DH. Each pregnancy is unique, you can never replace one with another.
Take care sweets, you're in my thoughts.
:hugs: krystal, its not wrong to want to concieve again, i told myself, and so did a psychic that it was the same baby trying to get through....they just wanted to be a diiferent star sign;)
i think so long as you can communicate your emotions and have a shoulder to cry on, you'll eventually feel better.
best of luck for next time:fingerscrossed:
Im only new on here so i do not know you, but sorry to hear. Remember there is always next time.
I was so sad to hear your news, we were on the TTC journey for so long together. I'd been following your posts on the 'due' thread and was devastated to read your last post:crying:
Try again as soon as you're ready, only you will know when the time is right.
Sending you lots of :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Krystal, I am very sorry to hear of your recent pain:-)
In the last two weeks I have also had a m/c following my previous two:gloomy: It's not a happy place to be and hurts like hell.
And each time I dont know how I can do it again and I feel so raw with emotion...
But after a few days my strength to have another wins over and I am ready to fight on and begin the journey again.
NO - there is nothing wrong with wanting something so badly. Sometimes you just have to fight a little harder and longer before you succeed and hold that precious little bundle in your arms..
So sorry that I missed this thread till today. Don't worry about wanting to conceive again. You will never be replacing this baby.
You are now a mother even though you won't be able to mother this child. Your baby has already changed you forever. Big hugs to you.
Hi Krystal (and everyone who visits this post)
I have been absent for a few weeks due to internet problems, but am back and have missed this place. Krystal, I suffered a first pg m/c 7 weeks ago today-see my thread. I was the same, wanted to actually wave a magic wand and be pg again- I was due on my b'day in Nov, which has made it even harder for me. I dont think you can ever replace the baby you didn't have, but you can always wish for another. I know that it gets easier to feel more optimistic because i am just getting to that point now, but when your body is physically ready you will get pg again. So i feel it is a matter of being emotinally ready. :hugs: I know from this site that some people have gotten pg without having an AF and others it takes longer- me being one of them! Please continue to write and hopefully we can all support you.
Thankyou to everyone for your support it means so so much to me. Im feeling a little bit better and really optimistic about coneiving agian hopefully soon. DP has been a little distant I think he has taken it pretty hard but he is getting better. He has taken all the baby stuff that we brought specifically for the baby like its first toys and stuff and put them in a box with the babys ultrasound photos and a note saying mummy and daddy love you which I think is his way of dealing with it.
my heart goes out to you Krystal.
keep strong... its easier said than done... you now have a gardian angel looking after you and your baby will always b in your heart... even wen its easier and your not thinking of her or him every hour that love never dies you are a mother now and i hope you get to act on them duties soon
I'm coming in a bit late, but I'm so sorry to hear of your loss Krystal...big hugs to you :hugs:
:hugs: to you Krystal. I'm sorry to hear of your loss. :hugs:
:( Only read your post today, what can I say :( I don't think you're wrong for wanting to try as soon as you feel ready ....
My gosh I missed this, I am so,so sorry for your and your husband I hope you both are getting by OK and you're not a bad person for wanting to have another baby, that little one gave you 8 weeks of happiness always remember that xx
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